You're not just marrying him or her you marry into all the chaos that you think you won't have to deal with

Get a passport.
People don't suddenly change for the better after you marry them.
Keep your resume current.
Having Children will not make you closer to your spouse.
Buy quality once, Buy junk forever.

Amen to sdt43's input.

If you are a parent, have a will and SIGN it...if you are an adult child, don't be afraid to ask your parents about their will and if their affairs are in order -- especially burial plans and end of life decisions.

Totally agree with everything listed. Especially the one about thinking twice before you have kids.

Teach everything on this list to your children.

Buy cheap everything for your guests!

So my sister in law came to visit and brought her kids. I want the best for my family so I went all out and bought a Queen size Aerobed, and all sorts of expensive placemats, napkins, towels etc., and FOOD. From the very first day, I realized I wasn't going to make the kids obey my super tidy rules in my "museum house" because I wanted them to enjoy themselves and I didn't want them to know me as Aunt Grouchy. Well, from day one, they started jumping on the Aerobed and they broke it. The placemats are ruined because my SIL did her nails on them, and I don't even want to know how much expensive food we tossed away when the kids just wanted to taste things or they just didn't finish it or whatever. I love them dearly but next time I'll save me the stress and buy cheap stuff and put out my old everything around the house.

Don't need to buy paper towels- this one took me a long time to know.

Floss every day.

@ b77 - but what do you use for disgusting messes (cat throw up, blotting up grease off bacon)?

@ bepsf - sounds like 1-4 could all be related.

Make sure that when you measure a tight space for piece of furniture that you measure at the baseboards level before committing to the purchase and assembly.

audacious- Cat puke is best handled with two scraps of cardboard (scrape rather than wipe) even if you have paper towels on hand. Then wipe down the spot with your cleaning product of choice and a cloth / paper towel / mop.

- Never trust anyone that your basement is dry. Treat it like it will flood. When you get that 'once in a 100 years' rain storm, you'll be glad you put your stuff up off the ground.

Never skimp on lingerie, chocolate, opera tickets & sex toys.

Hmm, there was no youtube in 1987 when I became an adult.

Eat right and exercise a little every day

No one ever said being grown up would be fun. Stop whining and go do something productive.

Don't marry him unless you would be downright proud if your child turned out just like him.

Good one, Moxie! =)

Wow, thanks everyone! Lots of good advice. I had to learn that not everyone who smiles to your face is a friend, and to leaving the nest to find yourself can be a good thing.

Get your oil changed regularly, and wear sunscreen.

Per William Morris - Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.

@audacious - getting rid of paper towels..
I have two small bins full of rags - cut up old towels, old dish towels, old tee shirts and microfiber cloths. One bid is for the disgusting rags used for cleaning gross things like dog throw up, cleaning trash bins, toilets, floors, etc. The other bin is for the rags I use for surface cleaning. I keep one microfiber cloth in the kitchen for cleaning the counters I rinse in hot soapy water after each use and after 3-4 days I toss that in the wash with towels. The gross rags get washed together and reused or I toss them. I got rid of sponges too and use a dish brush and brushes for cleaning bathrooms.
Its a small part of trying to be as green as possible along with a few other things I do.

I use to go through paper towels like crazy, this is much better.

I still use papertowels for cat...emissions (unless they're mostly liquid), but cloth for everything else.

@leapkate

You post reminded me of this:

"You change your socks. Why not your oil?"
--Mike Rowe

:-)

Re: thinking twice before having kids. If you think too hard, you never will (who in their right mind would?).

I wish I had known that it really doesn't matter what other people think of me (I'm 46 years old and I'm still trying to learn that--thanks Mom!)

The best way of cleaning up cat puke? Get a dog.

(I *know*! I *know*! It's disgusting! I kept trying to get to it first, but my dog does a much better job than even my steam cleaner! There's not any kind of stain left when she's done. I've given up and decided that this is going to be my dog's chore. Goodness knows she loves it.)

And wisdom for the ages?
Learn how to go to the movies by yourself.
If you've been yearning to do something for 3 years straight, either do something to make it happen or let it go.
Don't think a bigger paycheck will lead to a better life.
If you have a good family, keep hold of them with both hands. If you have a lousy family (back-biting, abusive, self-centered, don't give a crap about you), really, it's OK not to talk to them. You will meet people who will be your true family.

go to college. i didn't. i lost my good paying job 2 years ago and now work for less than I did at age 20!

Awesome advice, moxie!

Make a will and various powers of attorney in your state and keep them up to date.

This really hit home when my BIL almost died from a chance viral infection last year. It was finally the boot we needed to get all our "stuff" in order.

Very little matters and your home, job etc don't define you. Every day you should think about who you love and who loves you.
I learnt this last year when I went through (successful!) cancer treatment. Makes life very simple.

Travel! Even if it's just a 2 hour drive away, go away whenever possible. A change of perspective does wonders for your mood.

Take care of your health and know your body. Be aware of any changes, good and bad.

Rosie2, bless you and bless the subjunctive tense!

Don't just get a will- when you divorce, update your will and update your life insurance beneficiary! Someone I know, his new wife got nothing and the witch he divorced..well you can guess what happened.

I agree with the paper towels (don't need them) and keeping boxes of rags.

I love the old saying 'A place for everything, and everything in its place'. Makes life so much easier!

I've never met a parent who said 'my kids don't have enough toys'. Most of your relatives love spoiling your kids so they'll always buy loads of crap for your kids. Your really don't need to buy them much.

Don't buy your kids a games console. It'll be hell trying to get them to do anything like homework or engage in anything healthy!!

Oh, I've just remembered a good one from the Bee Gee's. 'To many lovers in one lifetime ain't good for you'.

There is never a perfect time for anything.
Just keep your body in good order and live life to its fullest, seizing every opportunity, because opportunity may not come knocking twice.

Don't wait to have children... You don't need as much as you think. Kids are more fun and more rewarding than anything else. Ever. Period.

You don't HAVE to have children. Being a favorite auntie who picks up your sister's/friend's kids and takes them for a day of fun is plenty of kid time for a lot of people, and your sister/friend will love you even more.

Volunteer. Become a mentor or a tutor. Sponsor a classroom in a needy school for supplies or a field trip.
Fund a year of college or set up a scholarship at your alma-mater for the School of Education. The school will find a worthy recipient.

Amen, Pearmelon. I second the advice of not thinking too hard before you have kids or waiting for the "right" time. That time will never come.

And take fiber pills :)

Smile, exercise, eat healthfully, indulge occasionally, say "Thank you", keep learning, and relax.

Never, ever, ever settle for your significant other. It might take talking to someone else about it before you realize it, but do not settle! You deserve to be happy and if you're not happy with your significant other, then get out of that relationship!

>22. Don't start activity B until you've cleaned up after A.

Still struggle with this one, sometimes it's because I'm trying to do three things at once and sometimes it's just because.

>No one ever said being grown up would be fun. Stop whining and go do something productive.

Love this, and will recycle it.

Mine would be something around those big decisions we agonise and lose sleep over.

Imagine yourself doing A, if that feels wrong then the answer is B.

my two biggest "I'm an adult now" realizations:

Learn to be grateful regardless of the situation.

Not needing to rely/depend on anyone does not mean that you can't or shouldn't lean on someone who tries to share their life with you. - Just because we can do it all by ourselves, does not always mean we have to.

In learning to repair things yourself, you'll save time and money if you have the right tools. Start with basic tools and a good toolbox. Take care of your tools.

Do NOT be afraid. Fear is the only real barrier.

"It's okay to ask for help."

Still struggling mightily with this one... :-(

Keep a Power of Attorney for Health Care card on you at all times, believe me, it does come in handy. other tips:

1. Always treasure your friends, they are priceless.
2. Live clean and don't but in others' drama, talk about peace of mind.
3. Try to repair your credit worthiness, but by all means don't let it define your worth as a person.
4. Be sincerely nice to others, it'll get you far in life, believe me, I know.

"You get what you settle for"

This is so true. People moan and complain about the treatment they receive from their partners, but mostly they have allowed that behaviour. Get out. Don't settle. Value yourself.

My biggest thing is to not owe on anything- live within your means. American society puts so much emphasis on living up to others expectations. Sometimes at night I'll peer into people's homes while in the car and notice that everyone has a flatscreen TV but they're in tiny ranch homes of no certain style. What is the point?

Don't buy things if you cannot afford it at that moment. Find a nice mid-class used car. Some instances are considered "good debt" but very few.

Don't take crap from people about your home, you are the one that lives there, the rest just visit and if they don't like it you can visit them.

Say hi to people in the elevator, it's only tense if you make ir so, even a smile goes a long way

It's nice to be nice.

Don't have kids or marry because "that's what adults do". Do it when you are ready.

As a teacher I have worked with many kids who came from homes where noone seemed to educate themselves on child-rearing, leaving it up to the school and church to do it for them. I learned how NOT to raise my own kids from these people. If you are too lazy or not interested in learning how to raise healthy and educated children, you are too lazy to have children.

Keep kids mostly TV free: let them fall in love with other things first (like reading, being outdoors, being creative, being social....)

Someone already wrote this but these are words to live by: "Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful." -William Morris

@ sukie: I love all of your advice. So many people assume that couples wait to have children b/c of financial concerns. As a fellow teacher (and someone who grew up in a home that was short on cash but abundant with love), I see that kids need love, stability, and guidance to thrive. My husband and I can't wait to provide those things for our child... someday when WE feel ready.

And don't forget the sunscreen.

Use the bathroom before you get on any form of public transit. You will never regret this.

There are things you'll only learn through relationships and love, and things you'll only learn in solitude. Both are valuable.

Make your sins worthwhile. In other words, don't get fat on Mickey D's and store-brand ice cream sandwiches, but definitely take a slice of your grandma's cake at Thanksgiving or order the steak at that bistro on your once-in-a-lifetime adventure in Paris. Don't waste your money on impulse buys for crappy junk that doesn't mean anything; do spend as much as you can for something you love that will be useful and beautiful for a long time to come.

Be grateful for every single day.

Everyone in the world is fighting a hard battle, and most of them are battles you can't see. So be kind every chance you get.

Happiness is, for most of us, more a matter of our individual choice than anything else. If you're waiting on money/success/a significant other/kids/possession/etc. to make you happy, you will spend a lot of time being miserable.

Spend less time judging other people's actions and choices and more time examining your own.

1. When you are carrying drinks on a tray, look straight ahead -- NOT at the drinks on the tray.

2. When you are chopping onions, place the cutting board on an UNLIT gas burner in front of a LIT (on low) gas burner. The back burner will burn off the fumes and you will not get watery eyes.

3. Use "it's" only when you can substitute "it is" or "it has." Otherwise, use "its" (w/out the apostrophe. There are no exceptions to this rule.

Love love love this thread. More, please.

If he was never made to do his own laundry and his momma still comes over to clean, don't marry him.
Know how to check the oil in your car.
Take a walk every day.
Make your kids read books. Reading comprehension and a long attention span will do them more good than trying to make "digital natives" out of them.
A smile plus the words for "Please," "Thank You," "Coffee," and "Stop bothering me" in the local language will get you through most foreign cities.
Some animal rescues need people to socialize kittens and walk dogs. Go play with kittens and puppies, but adopt an older animal. They need you more and you know what you're getting in terms of personality.

Truer words never spoken, Schnitzelbank. Investigate a potential partner's laundry habits before becoming emotionally invested. Those who never do their own laundry or cleaning tend to have lots of practice in hiding this flaw or deflecting blame onto roommates.

If you're buying a home get it professionally inspected. You wouldn't buy a pair of pants without trying them on so know what you're buying. A house costs more than pants.

Your job does not define you. How you treat others is how you will be remembered. The greatest gift you can give people is your time. Be present.

Sometimes all you need to do is shut your mouth and listen. People do not always want advice or you to solve their problems. They just want to be heard.

Don't waste your time on being respectful to those who go out of their way to disrespect you. Simply be civil. Life is too short to go out of your way for those who treat you poorly.

Be your own best friend. You are the only one who is with you 24/7 for your entire your life. Pay attention to how you talk to yourself. Is it positive? If not you should work on that.