Good Lighting: Nothing is more uncomfortable than a dark room or a room lit by a single ceiling fixture - but plentiful light sources spread around the room on dimmers makes any room cozier.

Large Wool Rugs: Little rugs can easily look cheap and sloppy. Large rugs convey luxury, and nothing feels better under your feet than wool.

Occassional/End Tables - Every chair/sofa and bed needs a table next to it for a reading lamp and where one can place a drink or a book . Tables needs to be no more than 1-2 inches lower than the height of the arm of the chair/sofa or top of the mattress so it's easy to reach while seated/in bed, but no higher so it won't knock your elbow. The best tables will include some sort of storage so that remote controls, kleenex, magazines, etc. can be conveniently stashed away.

Plants and rugs. Snacks when guests come over. Knick-knacks and toys for people to play with.

"Have plenty of coffee tables and ottomans..."

I don't think I have ever seen a living room with more than one coffee table...

I allow, no, encourage my smoker friends to smoke in the house... and set out ashtrays.... there are so few smokers left and they are so well trained and well mannered about their habit now (the old-grump complaining about civil liberties is a thing of the past) that my apartment runs no long term risk of smelling bad and stale, an open window overnight clears it out... if non smokers are present the smokers always head for the balcony anyway...

plus I am a 60's stewardess at heart: coffee tea or me, or a nice voddy, is offered the second anyone comes in the door (glasses of water are the most popular)

also, there is almost nothing in the place that you feel obligated to commit ritual suicide over if you spill on it... I have a dark couch... being carpet free for guests is a great relaxer for everyone, though patterned rugs are up to anything, very forgiving

I am also HONOR BOUND to never betray distress over any breakage or spillage EXCEPT around the computer which gets PUT AWAY for that reason

Finally, if you are comfortable pooping in someone else's house then that someone has truly made you feel at home: so I check the T.P., and leave matches or a deodorizer and reading material in the bathroom. Paper towels by the sink win over little fussy towels... so (note to self) I better get some....

"I am also HONOR BOUND to never betray distress over any breakage or spillage EXCEPT around the computer which gets PUT AWAY for that reason"

Word. There's nothing more off-putting than a host running around tucking coasters under guests' drinks and freaking out about every little dropped crumb.

I agree with bepsf that lighting is critical. When a room just has a couple of dimly lit, small lamps it feels like you are rare visitor in the home. It's also nice to be able to see food and drink clearly but never with glaring light. If you are having a guest spend the night, here are some tips whether they are staying in a dedicated guest room or in a space that is pulling double duty:

http://www.mydesignsecrets.com/2008/05/05/gracious-guest-rooms/

MyDesignSecrets.com

Books. They show that life is actually lived in that room.

Also, though this may not be for everyone, a cat or two add a comfortable vibe like nothing else.

I totally agree on the side tables. I love to eat/drink while reading and it's very awkward to have nowhere to put something down. Also, I am very cold blooded, so a soft warm blanket is very high on my comfort list.

"...a cat or two add a comfortable vibe like nothing else."

Unless you're a guest who is allergic to pet dander - then it's very uncomfortable...

"...a cat or two add a comfortable vibe like nothing else."

Unless you're a guest who is allergic to pet dander - then it's very uncomfortable...

... which is why he said this may not be for everyone. Hello!

My (mildly) allergic friends like to drop by and play with the cats breifly, because they like cats but can't live with them. I am happy to vacuum for friends, I have Claritin, I have Allerpet. But if anyone's insinuating I shouldn't have cats for the comfort of my guests, you're not invited.

We are lucky enough to have a (mildly) fussy formal living room for cocktails and chit-chat AND an ultra-relaxed "rec room" in the basement for full relaxation. This allows me to have my "carefully arranged tablescapes" and eat them too.

But parties always end up in the kitchen anyway. The number one thing I want to do next is put a dimmer on my kitchen ceiling fixture.

Fruit in a bowl for anyone to snack on

"...there's nothing more off-putting than a host running around tucking coasters under guests' drinks..."

While I agree that a host shouldn't freak out and chase around over coasters and such, if you consider yourself person containing a decent amount of courtesy, wouldn't you either look for coasters or improvise something to rest your sweaty glass on?

Philip_Littell, you totally captured my hostessing aspirations: less Martha, more 60's stewardess.

& this is what we mean when we say that many of the color entries look "too staged".

i think a thing that bugs me is when you visit someone & instead of chilling out they start pointing to all the reasons you should hate their home. it's usually the homes that are perfect. so, i sit there thinking, man, i must be a slob or something. haha

*btw, as w/ cats, some of us are allergic to smoke too. so, keep that in mind. last time i was around a smoker, i got a migraine for 2 weeks. & nothing is worse than leaving a party, knowing you're going to have to dry clean your clothes b/c you now smell like a bar.

flowers, personal photos, and candles

bprophs
YEAH!!!!

Some people get too comfortable.

I have a friend who whenever he comes over he is always touching the walls. I am not sure what his compulsion is, but I have seen dirty fingerprint marks on my white walls in every room he has been in.

Then I have another friend who wears sandals everywhere and insists on taking off his shoes in my house (I don't require it or even want it), and then puts his dirty feet on the couch. Let me just say, microfiber is a blessing.

I was raised that you made people comfortable by offering them a drink and or food, showed them where the bathroom is and gave them your undivided attention when they came over. I love it when I do casual and my friends come over to hang out, drink some beers and have a pizza and watch the debates and I love it when I do formal and have a dinner party. But host and guest behavior should be mutually respectful. Hosts should make guests reasonably comfortable. Guests should respect the investment that the host has made in their decor and follow their lead. If the host puts their feet up it's OK for you to do so. If they don't then don't unless they invite you too.

the real advanced level test is if you can make your in-laws comfortable when they visit while staying comfortable and secure yourself (NOT EASY)

find out what they drink

the most comfortable homes I've been in have corners that invite you to curl up with a book in them... the more the better

I haven't gotten the knack of the nook yet in my current place

blankets ( I call em binkies) REALLY work

Lighted candles.