Alice, I Found My Dream Apartment But it Makes My Mother Nervous, Should I Take It Anyway?

Alice, I Found My Dream Apartment But it Makes My Mother Nervous, Should I Take It Anyway?

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Ask Alice
Aug 29, 2017

Hi Alice,

I'm currently renting in a new city and have found what I'd like to call a dream place. I've been for a viewing and have already started visioning the interiors and imagining life in my new home. It's a lovely flat with lots of light, large windows and an amazing view.

Only issue is, it's on the 16th floor. There are lifts and fire safety stairs, and although my mum originally thought the space was delightful, she is now opposed to my moving in due to it being so high up.

This will be the second home I've rented, and although she won't be living there, my mum's approval is important to me. I've spoken to friends who have given me a pretty 50/50 split on the place and I'm not sure what to do — should I follow the advice of others who may be more experienced in house hunting, or trust my heart/gut and prepare myself for eating dinner with a beautiful view?

Kind Regards,

Lost in Translation

Greetings Lost,

Congrats on weathering the apartment hunt, it's always exhausting and challenging in new and unexpected ways. When it comes to finding *the one* when it comes to apartments, nothing beats that gut feeling. You just kind of know don't you? You feel like the life you've always wanted sort of unfolds in front of you on your new kitchen island or exposed brick or whatever it is that gets you going. But I digress. After that rush, it's important to do your due diligence; read Yelp reviews of the management company, even just a google search of the address and the people you're about to hand over a considerable deposit to is worth it.

I'm guessing your mom is concerned for fire safety, and generally buildings of a certain size are legally required to have yearly inspections from the fire department, you can also request the records of inspections from your fire department . When you call to follow up on the place, ask your landlords about the building's sprinkler system. (If they get cagey or annoyed at you asking about safety features that is a big old RED FLAG and you will be happy you asked so you know to move along). Be smart and get acquainted with the fire safety features and exits of your building.

Now there are plenty of other disasters, natural or otherwise, that your mother could be worrying about. It never hurts to know the safety precautions and emergency plans of your new city, but aside from that, life is life. Everything is a risk. And while that may be a cold comfort to your mother, it is true. If this building is holding up its end of the bargain to keep you safe, and it feels truly right, go for it.

It is great to have your mother's approval, but you are going to live there, not her. And I highly doubt that living in this spot will stop her from coming to visit you. If she's super nervous ask her to buy you a fire extinguisher for a housewarming present (depending on her sense of humor). Have a safe and happy housewarming!

Best,

Alice

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