apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

I also live alone, and I love my coming home ritual.

1. Walk in the door, kick off the shoes, deposit the purse by the bookcase, and set the keys in the bowl.

2. Stretch out on the couch and sort through the mail. Toss the junk into the bronze can at the end of the couch and read the real stuff.

3. Grab this month's Atlantic Monthly or this week's Entertainment Weekly and read until my body temperature has returned to normal after my mile walk home from the metro station.

i remember what it was like to come home to an empty apartment. (heavenly!) my ritual was to shed my bag, keys, coat, shoes - this was pre-cell phone. i would change into pajamas, or just skivs in warm weather, pull something out of the fridge and settle into the couch with my book, magazine, knitting or something else.

i really miss that time alone, as a mom of a 4-year-old and 2.5-year-old who jump into my arms the second i walk through the door. that's great in another way, but i miss having that quiet little transition time before starting the work of cooking and keeping house.

The most important and memorable thing I do when I get home each day is say hello to my cat and ask him how his day was.

And my stress level, from work and traffic, plummets to zero.

Lock door, greet cat, take off shoes and outerwear, deposit keys and bag in appropriate places, sift through mail, turn on computer for e-mail.

Come home, take shoes off, jacket/coat, place in hanger, stow purse in the designated space in the closet. Repeat this with my 17 month old son. Walk together in the bedroom, change into home clothes (comfortable cotton clothes) he also gets a diaper change and his house outfit. Then we drink some clean water, have some bread with olive oil and olives (he loves these) and cheese. Read a book, The Car book is a hit lately - the Wheels on the Bus is so yesterday now. Prepare dinner, one of us sits with our son, feeding reading etc. Then we sit again together and have dinner as a family.

I just love that door.

At one place I'd put down my stuff, undress, wash my feet and remove my makeup, put my hair up and put on comfy clothes, and then lay on my bed to read mail.

At another place, I'd usually drop everything, strip and throw clothes around and hit a cold, cold shower to cool down. Then I'd lay on the bed and flip on the TV until I got cold and needed to get dressed.

Deposit purse & keys, turn off alarm, greet the dog & give her lots of pets. Then I fill her bowl with kibble and sort through the mail...

I like this post. I too live alone and have been lamenting the fact that I come home and mess around on the computer for longer and longer stretches. Sheesh, I sit at a computer all day and can't stand that I've gotten into the habit of doing the same once I get home. Glad to hear I have company and maybe tonight will be the night I break the habit.

I come home, shed all my commuting/workday accoutrements and change into something comfy right away. Next, I fill up a basin with hot water and a little bit of fragrant soap, and then I go sit in my comfy chair soaking my feet, which take quite a pounding [not to mention get stinky :-) ] since I don't own a car and walk everywhere. Usually, I'll either just sit quietly and clear my mind awhile, or I'll read something light. This does WONDERS for helping me wind down and relax after a long day, and it's especially great in cold weather for getting me warmed back up after standing at cold bus stops.

Put my things down. Sort mail. Greet dog. Greet husband. Go for a walk with dog and husband.

Don't live alone, but the hubby gets home after me so I come in the door, at which my two kitties are impatiently waiting. I greet them, get their food out and talk to them while I prepare their dinner. After the furry friends are fed, I wash my face and hands and get into pajamas or a sweat suit and lay on the bed (at which time the furry friends come to join and snuggle). I watch a little Grey's Anatomy for a while (which I love because it's all about friendship) and then get up to cook or whatever, but the wind down time is absolutely necessary and appreciated.

Ideally I would like to greet the cat, remove coat, remove shoes and wash my hands but somehow it has become greet cat, remove shoes, check messages, then remove coat. It is sad and gross that I have somehow rid myself of washing my hands when coming in from the outside.

here is my routine:
1)walk in, grab mails, say hi to my cat, set keys and mails on top of the entry table.
2)kick my shoes off and put my purse on a dining chair
3)feed my cat, and change into something comfy.
4)turn on stove and cook. mails can wait...

I say, forget the dog 'authorities' and give your poor dog some attention!! There's nothing better than giving love! When I come home, I have 3 kitties and my teenage son to greet and shower love on. That completely relaxes me and I breathe better knowing I'm home with my loves.

Thank you so much for a real first person piece. Really.

As one who also lives alone and *also* spends too much automatic time on the computer, even after working in front of one all day....it's comforting to hear that I'm not the only one.

Enter, shed outerwear, drop keys and purse on counter, check mail, if I'm just getting home and it's after 9 PM, pouring a glass of wine figures prominently in there somewhere...

So - who has better suggestions? I do always greet my cat...she's very affectionate after being left to her own devices all day.

No computer allowed for me, but I tend to do too many chores with not enough playtime with the cat.

I greet and feed cat; dispense with mail; put away shoes, outerwear, keys (so as to not leave them in the door again), lunch dishes, bike gear; and then relax a bit.

I am not living alone, but have a much shorter workday, so it's soon dinner duty time for me.

Word to whomever said petting the cat equals relaxation!

As bike riding season comes to a close, it will be time to incorporate an indoor workout into my routine.

Kyle,
Your dog is so precious!

I pet and scratch cat, hang up key, switch outdoor to indoor shoes and take off outer layers, recycle any envelopes I've removed from the mail in the elevator (since I'm so super-efficient) right into the paper recycling in closet by door, put the rest of the mail on the table in the kitchen or wherever it belongs if clear, drop my bag in an interim spot for unpacking and eventually unpack. Feed and water the kitty. Then, I'm not sure what I do, but I don't think I'm doing enough relaxing things, based on what I'm reading here. I either get stuff ready for the next day, because I never want to do it later, or start cooking dinner, or root around in the fridge, turn on an internet radio station and then get stuck surfing. Generally, I'm moving towards eating and either watching something or reading something. I agree, it's really easy to get stuck on the internet. But, I've gotten better since I put a premium on my reading and viewing (netflix or online shows).

Cats, cats, cats. They come first. They eat, and then everything else falls into place.

Oh, I forgot a step. In between the depositing the keys and sitting on the couch with mail, I generally strip and then put a robe on, because I am loaded with sweat from the hike from the metro. I am so thankful winter is here - summer walks are brutal in DC.

You know what I really miss from the pre-internet days?

Clicking my answering machine for messages. Or asking my college roommate if anyone called.

Shoes off, dig pockets, pull out keys and change and put'em on top of my wardrobe. Throw away fast food receipts or any other trash. Sit on my chair and see what I missed (email, blogs, etc.)

A habit learned from life in a big city - the first thing I do when I come home is go to the kitchen sink and wash my hands.

Why did you change the picture, I liked the one with all the hats and the wellies.
My kitty boy comes first and must be fed and praised for his hard day when he had so much sleeping to do.
And thanks for pointing out the habit of cking email or phone messages, it is a habit I want to break unless expecting something important. It does become mindless after a while.
I like the idea of washing the feet, with a little massage it really rejuvenates you.

I receive the dogs' greetings (at least one is right there when I crack open the door). I fight my way into the house; the dogs are usually exuberant in greeting me even if I haven't been gone long. They generally stand right in the doorway and are reluctant to make room so I usually have to step over one, but I have to be careful that they haven't anticipated where I will step or I end up stepping on a paw or other body part. I try to find a spot unoccupied by a dog in order to put my purse and/or bags down right inside the door. While the dogs sniff and investigate whatever I have set down (I have to be careful when I bring in groceries), I take a quick look around and assess what they've done in my absence (the house is never exactly how I left it). I immediately change into my 'take out the dogs shoes' and then take out the dogs.

Unlock door, pet very excited dog, hang up coat and purse, pet dog, check freezer to see if I should thaw something for dinner, pet dog, turn on music, pet dog, let dog out, let dog in, sit down at computer, pet dog.

I used to live alone and now have a roommate. When I lived alone my ritual was pretty similar to what it is now with a few exceptions- mainly choice of rooms for ritual activities.
Of course the very first thing I do is hang my bag and keys on their hooks when I walk into my room. It is in said room that early phase of activity begins. I then shed the day's clothes and crawl into loungey clothes.
I check my facebook since I can't do that at work. I like to do this with my macbook while sitting up in my most comfortable bed.
After scrolling through all my friends recent status updates, pics, etc, then it's time to check the snail mail. This is where things shift. I grab the macbook and my phone and head to the living room. I flip the TV on (usually to HGTV, food channel, or Bravo) walk outside, grab the mail, come back inside and start to sort. On a good day, there's a magazine waiting for me, so I grab a cold glass or water, sit on the couch, flip through the magazine and catch up on tv and just let the day melt away. That's the ritual, the rest of the night lends itself to dinner, boyfriend, friend, roommate, or on all too rare an occassion, a hot bath, painting my nails and Bravo!

.

1. Throw down my bag
2. change my clothes and get into my grubbies

I must be the only anal person on here because...

3. Wash my hands

I can't think of doing anything else until I've washed my hands and free myself from the grime of the day (no, I don't work in a coal mine). :o)
4. Then make dinner, read a book, check phone messages, maybe make some calls, watch tv.....

Wow, I've really got to get out more.

Pretty much the same as most:
1) bag near landing strip at door, keys on hook beside door and coat on coat hanger
2) greet kitty at door and ask kitty what she did today
3) proceed to have conversation with kitty cuz she's important, too
4) I don't just stop at washing my hands. I go for the face and brush my hair, too - nothing feels better!
5) glad to see a lot of people change into their comfy clothes and schlep about
6) I work nights, so a nightcap is in order and then I unpack my lunch bag, plug in my mp3 to power-up (if I remember)
7) maybe read or watch an internet show

I'm on oxygen due to a bacterium that nearly killed me, and did kill my partner of 15 years.

Now my arriving home habit is to switch from temporary tank oxygen to my home oxygen concentrator.

It makes you appreciate the little things.

I love that so many others understand the importance of greeting the cats. It is the first thing I do when I walk through the door after I have deposit my shoes outside the main entry. Then the purse goes in the closet, cell-phone on the counter, and keys on the landing strip. I immediately straighten up the living room. Then I shed my "teacher garb" and begin to think about dinner for the hubbie and I (who comes home later).

Hey, they have a different photo now than the original post. This door I don't love as much.

I get out of my car, walk down the sidewalk to the front door (cursing my husband for leaving the porchlight off AGAIN because spiders tend to congregate there), I unlock the door quickly in the hopes a spider won't have time to jump on me. I yell at the cat who is trying to escape and gently push her back into the house with my foot. After clumsily kicking off my shoes, I toss my purse, keys and any other items in my arms on the couch. My husband looks up from his book to say hi, I say hi back and then we commense with ignoring each other for a few minutes while I shake off the stress of my commute. Usually after that we decide on dinner.

It sounds a lot more unhappy than it actually is. I commute on a very busy and roadrage stricken stretch of highway for half an hour each way, so it's best if no one addresses me right when I get home lest I bite their head off.

lock the door.
climb the stairs.
deposit the mail.
check phone messages.
change into home clothes.
take medication.
check to see mother in law is still alive [she lives with us].
turn on the tv for her.
make cocktails for me and my partner.
start to cook dinner.
we be hungry.

My routine is mundane but those shingles are gorgeous.

Open the backdoor and step aside so the cats can make their mad dash to the neigbors house for "tuna juice", I have very excellent neighbors. Change in to my "after school clothes" get the mail, putter around around the yard looking at the weeds... sit on the porch read the mail and decide how much energy I have for dinner and plan a menu accordingly, one involves firing up the grill the other making a delicious bowl of Cherrios!

I greet the cat and have a conversation with him while getting out of working day clothes, cleaning up and putting on sweats. Then I make tea and sit down at the computer, but not for long because the cat yells at me to play, so we have a few games of chase and hide before I try the computer again. This time he sits on my lap and gives me a little massage; only fair, hmm?

I check the mail on the way into the building, drop my bag on the chair by the door once I'm home, take off my shoes and chat a bit with my cats. Change into home-clothes (cats are hard on work clothes), feed the cats and then call my parents to say hi and see how their days were. While I'm on the phone with them I pull my gym clothes out of my bag and hang them to air, hang my work clothes to air and open windows/turn on fans if the room is too warm.

After that it's straight to the computer and assorted chores for the evening. If it's the computer, I become a cat bench so I type with one hand and pet with the other.

i wash my hands when i get home also!
put down parcels, put bag away,take off coat and put away, take off shoes and put away. wash hands. change clothes.take off any and all make-up. turn on lights. light incense.then make tea.

My birds hear me when I turn the key and greet me from across the room when I open the door. I quickly hang my stuff on hooks, kick off my shoes, and go give them kisses and ask them how their day was. Then I wash up, change into comfy clothes and put some dinner on.

-walk in sorting mail @1:15am (2nd shifter);
-greet excited doggy;
-boyfriend comes downstairs to greet me;
-wash hands/eat something;
-talk to boyfriend about day and we both take doggy out for final walk of the night; and
-wash up for night and settle into bed with a decor mag/book.

Live alone too.

With a cat and a dog, coming home is more than just plopping the keys down and taking the shoes off (which the shoes come off as soon as I enter).

Both are genuinely happy to see me enter and the dog (he's a 70 lb lab) gets spazzy and does circles with his tail under his legs in "Mom's home, Mom's home....MOM'S HOME!!!" It's funny as can be.

The cat greets me too with a meow as if to say "sheesh, where have you been all this time? Now feed me!" If it's time to feed them then I do that after a couple of scritches.

Depending on the time of day, then I take my dog out for a pee, come back in, change into something comfy and I settle on the computer chair.

It's a similar ritual to pre-computer (early 90s) when I would plop on the couch so my routine hasn't changed much, just different animals and I do check my regular haunts on the computer now.

Home is my sanctuary so there's not a lot of activity and I am just fine with that.

When I was single, I used to come from work, dropped my purse somewhere, get comfy clothes, grab something to eat and sometimes a small cocktail, grabbed the remote and zapped like crazy. I had too much time in the computer at work I didn't want to get near one.

Now I am a sahm so my routine is all about getting my 20 month comfy and carring his stuff inside, or when I go out without him I run inside to greet him, theeen I drop my purse and stuff.

Come home, de-coat, de-bag, de-shoe, flip on fireplace, de-bra, slump on the sofa for 10 minutes and then go search for some food and/or wine with my dog at my heels.

Throw bag down, put keys and sunglasses in nice pewter bowl, take shoes off, remove all jewelry, take a shower throw clothes in hamper, put on comfy lounge clothes, throw load in dryer from morning wash.

Then, I turn tv on or NPR on radio. raid the fridge for fruit and my favorite vitamin water. Oh forgot, say hi to husband and ask him what he is cooking for dinner.

Jump on my coach (we each have our own) so no fighting for coach space LOL, check FB and email, check out my favorite blogs, eat dinner, read my favorite magazines and daydream about all the new decor stuff I want.

I loved reading everyone's routines. Mine is pretty simple: enter, lock door, take off shoes, greet kitties, put bag where it goes, take out cell phone, put cell phone on charger, put my rear-end-length hair in a pony, and then deal with whatever I brought home (I don't work so when I leave, it's generally to get something).

-Ditch purse and shoes as I come in
-Shut door and lock (it's always locked)
-Empty pockets into tray by door
-Put jacket (if I have one on) where it goes
-Deal with the mail, groceries, etc that I brought it

I agree with the other people that commented that you should take care of your dog first. Your puppy has been cooped up all day without any human contact. You are his/her pack leader. Your dog is glad you came back. Isn't it great to have someone happy to see you every time you come into the room? Get closer to your dog's eye level when you come home and give your animal some kindness. Set you stuff down and change into running shoes. Then, take your dog for a walk. Good weather, bad weather - your animal needs to know there's more to life than the couch and television and the big cold box with two doors that holds food. Try it. Works for me :)

usually I left my bag and my coat in the living room and then I go to my bedroom, open my closet and then, very slowly take off all my clothes, my earrings and all the rest of the jewlery and finally put on my home-clothing (old t-shirts and pants), wash my hands and brush my teeths...

then i lay in my couch with my mac to check my google reader ;)

lovely post!!

I live alone too... and... I LOVE IT!!!!!
I work until 7 PM so I'm never home before 7.30 PM.
I always take my shoes off before entering my flat! Say hi to the kitties while I wash my hands, switch on the heating and check the contents of the fridge for my evening meal. I change into comfy clothes, close the curtains, settle down in the couch with a cup of herbal tea and chill out.

Great post.

I'm with Sugarbakers--I miss coming home to an answering machine and coming back from a meeting or lunch and finding little pink While You Were Outs on my desk. I'm not sure that fielding a call from one's gynecologist on the crosstown bus at rush hour is progress or a mark of a civilized society.

Here's my homecoming routine: Remove shoes, hang up keys, bag, and coat. Deposit mail in its spot. Turn off cellphone and plug into charger. Greet cat and remind her that she's still the best one (she knows). Slip into something more comfortable and wash hands, face, and, in sandal weather, feet. Sit quietly in my favorite chair for 10 or 15 minutes intentionally not doing anything.

I live alone as well, I put my keys in the bowl, messenger bag down, change into my house clothes (pj's or sweats). I recommend that you greet the dog first (I greet my cats the minute I drop my keys & bag) and then give him something to occupy him (treat hidden inside a toy would work well, I give my cats treats and it keeps them occupied for about 15 minutes before they come looking for me to play or for laptime). In most seasons I head outdoors to check that the potted plants are OK but in cold or rainy weather I just head to the kitchen to make tea or spiced cider or for a glass of wine. In my case, I'm learning to avoid computer time in the evening, I try to check my regular sites in the early morning as I'm starting my work day from home before heading into the office. I just seem to get the 'standard' sites, like email, checked more quickly (I also limit myself to 7 daily sites to check in on and that includes 3 email accounts, 1 for job hunting, 1 for personal emails, 1 for junkmail). I have an ulterior motive because more and more, in the evenings, I'm trying to get away from the computer & TV and head to my studio to make stuff. There's something about doing that, whether it's making art or sewing or painting or writing, that clears my mental clutter from the outside world... home is becoming more sanctuary.

Come home
Kiss the guy
Snug the dog
Wash my feet
Close myself in the bedroom
Light a candle
Grab a book
Read for a bit