Move to the big city, they said. You'll love Chicago, they said. Housing is affordable and there's always something to do, they said. All was well and good until that dreaded night when we first saw them. Bed bugs. Big ones, small ones — it was like an instant infestation. After a mildly embarrassing freak out, I'm here to take advice and give it back to our readers who might do battle with them some day.