Dishwashers and Grandmothers

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Q: My husband and I are planning for our first child and my mother is suddenly really hung up on us getting a dishwasher. Our kitchen is tiny, and there is nowhere we could put one without doing a complete remodel (which we can't afford). She says we can't raise kids without one, and has gone so far as to inform me that "everyone else can get us traditional baby things at the shower, but she will be buying us a dishwasher" She is convinced she can find a model that will fit in our kitchen (doubtful) or, failing that, seems to think then when presented with the dishwasher she thinks we secretly want, we will change our minds and go ahead with a remodel. My husband grew up without a dishwasher... and he came out okay. How do I convince her to let it go?

Sent by MeganEditor: It can be hard to make people understand the limitations of small home living. Sure, I'd love a dishwasher too, but there isn't room in my "cozy" apartment kitchen for one either and I'm surviving just fine, too. If it was my mother I'd just be very firm - gracious but firm. Readers, have you found yourself in a situation like this with a parent? How would you handle it?

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As Apartment Therapy's Family Editor, Carrie covers design and modern homelife with children. A lapsed librarian, she lives in Brooklyn with her husband and two kids and is in contention to break the record for most hours spent at the playground.

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