My mom's place, for sure. It might not be 100% clean, but I don't have to do anything around there, and ever piece of furniture is comfortable and familiar. We have a tradition in our family, whenever one of us (5 girls) has wisdom teeth yanked, or a similar surgery where we need to be sedated, we schedule it for a Friday, and crash at my mom's place for the weekend to recover. We're all scattered throughout California with lives of our own, but that's always "home".

My brother's house for sure.

I will just go veg out in front of their huge tv and hang out with my nephew and play with the dog. I completely decompress and my sis-in-law is a great cook who always feeds me. :o)

Definitely my oasis.

I think it's the "other people" there not just the homes. The familiar things around are comforting for sure, but would the space be as wonderful if the people weren't there?

i def agree with this!... at home i feel like i can never just veg out and relax completely...

i'll try to watch tv for hours, but i find myself getting up every commercial break to wash a dish... put something away (and in a studio all the things "out" stare me in the face!)

but at my boyfriend's house i can lay there for hours... maybe it's because he has tivo?

were moving in together this month so i hope the tivo keeps me engrossed enough to not do chores every 5 minutes.

Good friends are the best medicine. Hope you are feeling beter.

On a mildly related note, when I visit my parents' place I have mini panic attacks when I'm sleeping in my room. It's weird. I love going home, but I can never sleep well because I'm worried about all the stuff I need to do. But when I sleep in my room in my apt, no matter how much work I have, I sleep like a baby.

Yeah, I agree with orchidday. I would much rather sleep in my own room in my own apartment.

awww!!! all my family and friends are 6 hours away from me =o( but your really bless for having a frien who takes care of you like that!!! hope your feeling better.

That's what my OWN home is for -- I am never comfortable away. Making my own place my refuge was the whole point. And trying to keep up with the to-do list is part of keeping it a refuge.

I much prefer my place to someone else's. A lot of people I know are packrats or are busier or whatever. They're good friends, but it stresses me out. I just ignore the mess and relax in my bedroom. It's the best place.

I can't relax in my Sis' home: Too much stuff to do, dinners to make, kids & dog to look after, etc...

...and I'd never impose that way on a friend.

That's why I have my own home.

I am not sure if it's because I am an introvert, but I feel best at my own place. I am always stressed when at other people's places. It also doesn't help that my best friend lives on the other side of the ocean...
But anyway I can relax fully only in my apt, when I can decide to do nothing, not to stress about anything, and even if there are dishes to wash - there is no one else who can be bothered by it... so if I decide to take "vacation" one afternoon after heavy work - I do nothing for hours. I would never be able to do it at other people's homes! I would always feel like I have to help, do something, chat, have a conversation and use the time we have together etc.

This is such a brilliant idea... I had forgotten all about this until I read it! I had this as a teenager. A friend of my mom's had an open house for whenever I needed a break: A huge fluffy bed with crisp sheets, one or two good reads on the nightstand (not ten books due back at the library last week)... no desk, no place to work at all!!! Basically went to lie round the pool, read the paper in peace and eat buckets of ice-cream. Not to mention breakfast of choice every morning... no chores, no cleaning up, no little responsibilities. What heaven!!! And no I didn't appreciate it nearly as much as I should have!

I love my own house, but I can relate. No matter how much I enjoy (and I do) taking care of my home, some times it just seems overwhelming. I wish I had a single friend like you do, a nurturing buddy. But instead, when life is too much, my husband takes me for a good night of sleep and self indulgence to the Hampton Inn. :)

I love packing up and spending a weekend at my parents house. I don't remember them being that doting when I LIVED there as a kid, but they sure go out of their way now.

How funny ... you just reminded me of the fact that, when I was in my 20s (a long time ago!), I used to love hanging out at a friend's place and talking late into the night, then sleeping over on the couch and having breakfast with her in the morning before heading back home. Something about avoiding that whole "rattling around by myself at home in the evening like a lone pea in a pod" thing made me feel much better. Now I'm much more rooted in my own life and my space and don't feel I need to escape solitude like that ... but two years ago, coming back late to the city with a friend after taking a vacation together and spending the night at her place rather than heading straight home felt similar ... especially when she made breakfast in the morning!

It is nice to have a place to go to when u need to get away, but I must agree with the people who'd rather be in their own homes to get away from it all. Your space is your refuge from the outside chaos, therefore, make it a peaceful space, a happy space - surround yourself with the things that you love and with the things that make you smile when you walk through the door. It's your HOME and there should be "no place like home".

Debbie
http://girlwhimsy.blogspot.com

I feel very comfortable at home, and actually I love playing hostess when people come to my place and also having them spend the night. I chose my couch partly because when the back cushions come off it's as big as a twin bed and it's so comfy to sleep on. I also make killer huevos rancheros and french pressed coffee for my guests :)

I love to stay over at some my friend's houses, too, because they will dote on me and that's a nice experience every once in a while. I don't feel anxious staying at others' houses, and it makes me wonder if people who do feel anxious grew up in homes where they did not spend the night at other people's houses. When I lived at my grandmother's in Mexico, she would never let me spend the night outside of our home, thank goodness my mom didn't enforce the same rules!

YeeeeEsss.. those Friends Homes are just Oasis for your SoUl... having a Green Tea with arOma..70% CAcao CholOlate...with Lots Of magaZines abOut inTeriors...Injoy in NIce Balcony With LOts of Flowers and sea View..just RelaXing... MMmMmmmm.. NiRVANA.

... Its also Nice to know that some Friends Feels so In my Own Home Too:-)))

Not really. I feel most relaxed and at ease at home, even when there are things that 'need' to be done. But when I am down I usually am not so hard on myself and it doesn't really matter if the windows need cleaning or there are papers waiting to be filed.

Home for me every time.

orchidday -- Agreed. I can't sleep well anywhere but in my own bed in my apartment. Everyone has moved since the fiance and I got this apartment (excluding my father-in-law who lives in this large house he keeps looking like a model and you are afraid to touch anything) - so no other place feels like home but here.

I had to chime in . . . I'm with the homebodies. I never feel fully relaxed at others homes, even my best friend. My own bed knows me like no other sleeping surface will, and only there can I fully, 100% relax.
I'm so comfortable with being by myself . . and I don't feel 'lonely' when I'm home alone. I actually LIKE being home alone. I can putter about and do as I please. And if I decide to stay in my PJ's all day and indulge in junk food, I can! Or I can enjoy a relaxing afternoon of yoga, with zero interruptions, etc etc. It's MY place, my very own retreat. :)

I understand feeling that your own home is the perfect sanctuary but… if you have a generous friend who wants to extend his/her home to you, I think it’s important to be a gracious guest and enjoy! Letting yourself relax in their care may show how much you appreciate them, their friendship and their fantastic hosting skills.

What's up at Chez AT? Laure, Abby and Bethz are all in a funk. It has to be something Maxwell's doing. Yes, Maxwell must be evil. Gregory's probably in on it, too. Bacon, he's the ringleader.

amber_lane -- It's not always that you wouldn't like to relax and feel at home there - you just get used to your own place. I can relax at my mother's apartment, I can relax at my mother-in-law's, I can relax at my grandmother-in-law's house (which is probably where I feel most comfortable besides home) -- but I can't feel at home and feel completely free to do what I want unless I am indeed HOME.

Another home body here.
And at the moment I'm being the one to offer a mini-break to a guest who needed some time away from home. I'm really enjoying looking after her and hopefully easing some stress.