Earlier this week one of our Good Questions sparked loads of lively comments about baby showers and gift giving, and the take-home message was that most of our readers are eager to celebrate new babies and give useful gifts. When parents are expecting more than one baby it can challenge the conventional wisdom that applies to singletons. Here are a few things to think about:
Before buying or making anything, trot out the loaners and hand-me-downs. The expectant parents need lots of everything and will be eternally grateful.
Clothes Yes, twins need twice as much clothing, but don't make any assumptions about how these babies will be dressed. My fraternal twin daughters look nothing alike and have no more in common genetically than sequentially born siblings, so I don't dress them the same. Look for versatile items that are easy to mix, match, layer and launder, like American Apparel onesies and BabyLegs. That said, there are some incredible garments that are fun for multiples, like the onesies pictured above from Etsy seller Oliver Blu Designs, perfect for our dachshund loving family.
Feeding Mealtime can feel like a military operation, and what works for one baby doesn't always work for a small posse. Devices like the Beaba Babycook aren't practical for turning out large quantities of food. Expectant parents who don't have a fully equipped kitchen but intend to make their babies' food from scratch would benefit tremendously from a steamer and a Cuisinart or immersion blender. For bottle feeding many parents of multiples swear by Podees.
Toys & Books No matter what, parents expecting multiples are anxious that their home will be overrun by baby toys, so the best choices for multiples come in small packages. There are a few personal toys that we have in duplicate (Sophie the Giraffe and the Squish), but in general we like toys that the girls can take turns with or enjoy together, like an activity cube. Sets of small board books like the Bright Baby Chunky Book Tray are great because there are enough to go around and they are easily stowed in an overstuffed diaper bag.
Gear This is extremely subjective, so when in doubt, ask. We are a two Ergo, two Gymini family who never uses more than one bouncy seat or pack and play at a time. We had no interest in new or matching; with our family's expanding carbon footprint we were grateful to borrow briefly used space-hogs like swings and exersaucers. Of course, some things are non-negotiable, so consider chipping in with friends on some of the costliest necessities like car seats and strollers; those requisite items make it possible for new parents to get out of the house with the babies. Those things are a family''s freedom and mobility.
Remember that love don't cost a thing. If all new parents are thankful for a home-cooked meal, a hand around the house or a few hours to themselves, then parents of multiples will appreciate that support exponentially.
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Frozen meals and gift cards were my favorite gifts. Oh, and diapers. Lots and lots of diapers. :)
I was overly grateful when people gifted diapers! I still want diapers for their birthday. I, too, have fraternal girls and never dress them alike. Many a time, I've returned one matching gifted outfit to get a coordinating outfit instead.
Great points. I wasn't so excited by identical outfits for our identical girls either.
Frozen meals were by far our most helpful gifts. I think cleaning services, photography sessions, and house help are great too.
My family put together a book of poems and family songs - we often read the books before bed. Now that my girls are older and know the people they love to hear each poem even more. Hint: don't make identical books!!
My twins are 7 months now and here's what we found invaluable:
Basic clothing separates in bigger sizes (6 month at least)
While we got lots of nice "party clothes" and plenty of newborn outfits, we are still using the 5 pack of simple one-color onsises long after the party dresses have been sent to the consignment shop. Also, I can almost never find both of the cute matching outfits when it's time to get dressed so their adorable factor is sort of a waste.
Gift cards, gift cards, gift cards.
We just had no idea what we were going to need so we asked to gift cards and I couldn't be happier. Most of our needs were things I never thought I would buy (like two full size electric swings) and things I thought we would use all the time (like that fancy Pack-N-Play I just HAD to have) are gathering dust. Gift cards let us buy the things we need as we need them.
Bottle holders
We bought a pair of podee bottles but our girls didn't have the mouth dexterity to keep the nipple in their mouth for a few months so were had to keep handing them the nipple back. In the meantime we made some simple beanbags to chock the bottle where it needed to be so the girls could just maneuver around the bottle to get the nipple.
Twin Nursing pillow
Even if you are bottle feeding these extra-big pillows are great for feeding two at once. I wasn't going to buy it but my pediatrician talked me in to it and now even my husband uses it to keep the girls and comfy on the couch.
My fave practical gifts to receive:
baby-sized hangers
monogrammed burp cloths/old-fashioned cloth diapers
nursing pads and x-large men's sleeveless undershirts
newborn socks from Children's Place in every color
quilted eye-cover/mask, for napping when the baby is napping
All great tips. I have almost 2 year old twins and an almost 5 year old daughter. The best gifts we received after our twins were born were:
-a double nursing pillow. I nursed exclusively for 6 months and wouldn't have been able to do it without the pillow.
-Any gift for the big sister. She was completely knocked for a loop (like we all were) when the babies were born and it meant so much to us when others remembered her.
-Meals, meals, meals. Don't underestimate the value of a casserole.
-Diapers, of course.
*diapers are ALWAYS welcomed!
*basics in WHITE ie-onsies, sleepsacks, towels, etc. (I have boy/girl twins and it's so much easier just to grab one white item instead of that horrid pink or "baby blue"
*frozen meals were great
*babysitting services so that i could get out of the house for a little while
When my friend had twins I made lasagna in (big) single portion throwaway containers.
Here are some more adorable onesies that are great for gifts - there are twin sets too - but they are cute on their own and very unique! Washable and durable, my babies got them as shower gifts and wear theirs all the time.
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheWishingElephant?ref=pr_shop_more
@ avimom: Genius! Baby hangers! I would never think to buy that for somebody, but I can see how that would be a useful gift!
The musts for us included a double nursing pillow (mine has been used 6 times daily for the past year!), some kind of carrier like an Ergo, 4 lovies (2 for the babies and 2 in the wash at all times), a pressure cooker for making fresh beans & lentils, and an immersion blender. Also, I completely disagree with the comment about Baby Cooks not working for twins. You'll want to feed your babies a variety of foods, and the amount that you can process in one batch with the Beaba is perfect for a few days - who has a bigger fridge/freezer anyways?