Now that you know the rules of when and where to make fake phone calls thanks to our post on 'Communifaking', we thought we'd give you the juice: How to actually pull off a convincing phony conversation in a desperate situation. A few tricks and tips after the jump...
- Make sure your phone is on silent! This includes all sounds, ringtones, text messages, low battery reminders, voice mail chimes...anything. If that phone goes off in the middle of a fake conversation, the jig is up. Most phones have a profile or quick silent setting that will allow you to turn all sounds on or off remotely fast. BUT two exceptions to the silent rule follow...
- Know your phone. Some phones have buttons on the side for controlling volume. Get to know these buttons well enough to utilize them in the dark or while they're still in your pocket. This way, if you're in the middle of an awkward convo and you need desperately out, you can always bail out with that urgent phone call. DO NOT forget to return to silent mode as soon as you "pick up" the call. Try to fumble with the screen as if you're deciding to answer or not.
- If you don't have side buttons and want to fake someone calling you, go to your ringtone section and hover over one or select one and it will play. Play the ringtone, then go back to your homescreen. This will interrupt the tone and it will look like you are answering the phone. Proceed with a conversation.
- Even if your phone is on silent, it may flash when events occur. If you have an external screen, face it away from the target.
- Have a fake conversation ready. In most social situations, a general fake laugh, or "really?" will do the trick for a quick blow-by. Think about how much you talk when your buddy calls. Probably not much more than a laugh or a quick, "That sucks."
- If you know in advance that you'll be needing to stage a phone call, try the popularity dialer. With a selection of empty other halves to conversations; a man friend, a chick friend, a boss and a cousin who needs money; you can easily get out of any unappetizing social situation. We tried out a little spell just talking back to the computer, and we think it's pretty easy and very convincing.
- Another option to the popularity dialer, especially handy if you need a specific excuse, is to leave yourself a half-ended message before you leave. Call your cell from any other phone and leave a message with whatever you'd want your imaginary bailout buddy to say. Set an alarm for the crucial moment later (or rely on one of the above "ring" methods). When the alarm goes off, go quickly to your voicemail and listen to your message. Voila! Instant sister-in-the-hospital!
- If this is an impromptu fake call, make sure that you leave time for the fake person on the other end of the fake phone call to respond. It won't sound realistic if you're the only person talking.
- Be courteous to the person you're dissing. A simple smile and nod, or a quiet "Hi" showing them that you would just love to stay and chat, but you're too busy!