I got a new cat about a year ago, and added him to my household of one person and one dog. I'd had another cat who died about a year prior. I followed the advice on this web site: http://www.messybeast.com/first-impressions.htm and found it really helpful. The cat and dog were successfully ignoring each other and happily co-habitating in about two weeks.

Last week, I got another cat, and followed the advice again. The cats were friends in about five days. I barely work, so I had plenty of time to do all the viewings and room exchanges and things, but it still happened very quickly. The new cat is a bit timid around the dog, but I expect another week will do the trick.

Both cats are extroverts, and the dog is old and cat-like, so as long as the cats don't try to play with her, she's fine.

When I introduced a new cat, it ended up in a 6am trip to the emergency vet and a staple to hold my poor cat's skin together. It is definitely very important to err to the side of caution when introducing cats to one-another.

One of my cats is very friendly but playful, so when he sees the other cat around, he goes right up to him to play. The other one is really defensive and a big biter, so we have to keep them separated in different parts of the house at all times.

I got super anxious when I got my second cat. I kept the new one in one room and let the other one keep roaming the rest of the house, but eventually they caught on to one another's presence and that's all they seemed to care about, poking each other under the door. I let them meet each other the next day, and let them start being together alone the day after that. It wasn't nearly the big deal I thought it would be--I was SO worried about introducing the cat the right way and trying to make sure everything went smoothly.

To sum up, sometimes humans are more anxious about change than the animals we're worried about. Base your actions on how they are actually acting, not how you think they'll act.

No way it will take months. It only took about a week before our babies had each established their own role in the home's hierarchy. Since we control the food, they allow us to think we're in charge. But, number 2 was probably pretty set on keeping her number 2 status.

The hissing and snarling stage, although totally traumatic to us, was thankfully, fairly short lived. We then went thru the "you don't exist and I refuse to be in the same room with you" stage; but, that didn't lasts very long either. Nowadays, they're licking each others' butts.

quiltmaster, I'm glad your experience was different, but it can indeed take months - or never happen, as in bethanyboo's situation. I've fostered dozens (truly, dozens) of cats. Each situation is different, even though my permanent residents remained the same throughout. One would think the same cats would react the same way every time to new residents, but in thinking that, one would be wrong. I would always err on the side of caution.

I'd go with a modified version of fjordtjie's recommendation. I say start out separated and following the strict introduction guidelines. If it becomes clear your situation is going well, then speed things up, being really careful and ready to go back to separte quarters BEFORE a trip to the vet is necessary.

After all of my experiences, I think I'll just wait until I'm all out of cats before I introduce a new one - and then I'll get 2 at once. Ha. Who am I kidding? I'll never be able to hold out that long.

Ahh Beth - there you are stealing my cat again! I love seeing your little beauty but it is always a bit of a shock to see my girl's twin on here. Glad things are working out with the cats.

I must disagree with quiltmaster; it totally depends on the cats involved. I have 2 and my oldest is a alpha male tabby (I can't even let him out of the house if I am outside because he attacks any dog crossing my path - I've watched him through the window and he totally ignores these same dogs if I am not around). When my youngest cat was brought home I followed all the advice, but the oldest still has issues. He will tolerate her only to a certain point, but makes it clear that he is still not happy, after five years that she was allowed to live in his house. I have photo evidence though of them totally getting along if I am not around, which proves he is jealous. I give him lots of attention so he will not feel replaced, but he sticks to downstairs while the youngest stays upstairs.

I'm impressed as it sounds like you have really planned this process, I hope you give an update with 2 kitties napping in each others arms.
The 2 times I introduced a new one to an old one never sent us to the emergency vet but never ended in a love story. And of course I will always wonder if I should have done this or that but I think cats will always be a mystery and I will never be able to outwit one.
I have read about the Rescue Remedy for animals but never tried it, do Like it for myself tho. How was it working?

Wow, I could NEVER try to introduce another cat into our household. When I moved in with my then-boyfriend, now-husband, my cat stalked and attacked him continuously for about two months. All three of us were traumatized. She loves him now, but it was enough to convince us to try to keep all changes in her environment to the bare minimum. I dread our next move...

Please keep up updated on your progress. Sounds like you are doing a great job from everything I have read here. I've seen some cats move in together and become best buddies within days, other cats who barely tolerated each other after weeks. All depends on the individuals. My cat Charlotte had to learn to live with a dog. While she was open to him right from the start, he was crazed around her. We had to take him to a trainer for a few lessons, and we also used a baby gate, slowly introducing him to her on his leash and giving him treats when he would remain calm. It took a few months, but now they are like brother and sister, and they even nap together.

How is this post about apartments or design?

Why can't they jump over the baby gate?

i dunno, but it the gates worked for my friends

I have been through a few moves with cats and it's my experience that they adjust very quickly. I think you do have to remember to spend a little time with/on them each day - something one can forget when in a rush to get everything in place.

Quiltmaster, my cats STILL hate each other even after five years. If the youngest walks up to the oldest, the oldest will hiss, swipe at her and then get up and leave. Some cats just don't get along, just like people.

Feliway worked (sorta) to calm my oldest at the vet. She only tried to kill him once, which is actually a huge improvement.

I wish this post had come out a year ago. I lived with a girl who decided to get a second cat (asking the other roommates as a sort of afterthought) and the two cats HATED each other! Not only that, our apartment was way too small for two fairly large cats. And our room doors had a tendency to pop open (awkward for other reasons), so the cats would get out and then beat the hell out of each other.

Even months later, after a sort of calm had come over the situation, they would periodically just get into fights. Needless to say, this experience did not change my mind about being a dog person...

Thank you Sox - I was wondering why it took so long for someone to say that. :)
My family cats would be over that gate in a heartbeat. Especially if there was food on the other side (doesn't matter if there was food on both sides). They can jump up on the counters (when they think no one is looking), they can definitely jump a baby gate if they want.

We have two cats - the first we had for over 10 years and the second "adopted" us about a year ago. The older one still gets her tail in a bunch if the new one is around. The new one could care less. I think no amount of introducing would have helped that situation.

Hi all, Beth here. So far, so good (meaning no physical attacks... yet). Just some hissing back and forth between the cats behind the gate. Not sure if the anxiety medicine has kicked in yet or if it takes a few days. And yes, the cats can jump over the gate--but have not tried it when the other cat was in the opposite space.

@Gallivant-- I love that she has a twin

@thistlefinch while Apartment Therapy is largely about home design and small space solutions, we also try and incorporate posts that deal with lots of other helpful home topics (pets included).

Rescue Remedy is perfect for this kind of situation, but a better (and easier) way to administer it is to put a squirt in their water bowl, that way they can be drinking from it throughout the day. It's also best to give it to them starting several days before the move, and continuing until several days after.

There is also a full range of Bach remedies (38 if memory serves) and, depending on the character of your pet, one or more of them administered the same way could be a good idea (for example, there is one for jealousy, another for change, etc)

Bach flower remedies are pretty much alcohol and superstition. What did the vet say?

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/12635462

I had to do this recently when combining 2 households. Unfortunately, 8 months later, when the 2 (male, neutered) cats meet there is STILL chasing followed by much hissing and clawing & someone has to break up a cat fight. I guess It doesn't always work out.

At this point we're trying to decide if it's best to keep them separate & in their own rooms (which seems cruel, they cry if no humans are in the room with them) or just let them continue to duke it out and break up the fights as best we can.

One tip I read and used:
While they're being kept in separate rooms for the first week or so in the new house, put their food dishes on opposite sides of the same door. That way they (sort of) have to eat next to each other.

And I guess it worked, as my cats live together just fine now!!

Oh, and they said if you ever see your cats grooming each other, you know they're OK.

We just got two new cats last summer, added to our one cat and two dogs. (It's a full house, especially when you add in five people!) Our oldest cat is around 10, male, and always did well with our dogs. One of the new ones was a kitten, the other a one year old; both females. The kitten tolerated everyone immediately, but loved our other new cat (we didn't adopt them together). She's just now starting to play with our younger dog (I think her size is helping her now) and she'll follow the older cat around all the time.

The one year old and our old cat took some time. The new girl is big, much bigger than our boy. She tried to boss him around, chase him, but it never went very well. They didn't fight...but they hissed alot. Eventually they settled into ignoring each other. Now they will sit with each other, or the boy will follow her around. On very rare occasions they'll play together.

So, pretty much, everyone gets along now. It definitely took a few months though, to get where we are. Oh and a warning; seriously consider how much of your life you want to spend vacuuming/sweeping/scooping before bringing that many furry ones home! I wouldn't trade them for anything but it has seriously upped the amount of cleaning we do!

My husband moved in almost exactly a year ago and brought his two cats into my apartment with my pug puppy. It's been HELL. One of the cats lives under the bed and only comes out around 2 or 3am to whine for a few hours, the other is a spiteful pooper and when anything is upsetting or cornering it or too loud or anything, plop goes the poop wherever the cat happens to be hiding. We've tried the Bach's and it's not even made a dent in their attitudes (my vet said it's just alcohol and it makes them a little drunk). Feliway was suggested to us a few days ago and we've ordered some online, but honestly... not just because I'm a "dog person".... I wish he could find another home for them. It's sad that they're so unhappy here, I'd never want that kind of life for my dog. But the chances of someone adopting two socially retarded, 11 year old cats with so many problems is like zilch and they'd probably end up being put down. So here they stay for now, and I'm really hoping the Feliway works miracles.

I can't wait to get a second cat to add to our family! We only have one cat right now (Abbey Road) and she is in desperate need of a playmate. In the mornings she always attacks us and runs around the whole apartment like a wild woman and I can totally imagine in her kitty brain playing this huge game, all by herself. She is so friendly with strangers and always likes to be in everybody's business (trying to use the computer is impossible - she sits right on the keyboard!) and I can't wait until we can get her a kittie friend.

Our place is much too small right now for another cat but when we upgrade (hopefully in about 2 years??) I would love to get a friend for her. She is about 2 now, so I don't know what would be best in age - should we get a new kitten or an adult cat? One part of me thinks that a kitten would be best because we could train it to our liking, but an adult cat could be good as well because they are calmer...oh I don't know! I can't wait for the time when Abbey Cat can have a friend.

http://www.abbeycatchat.com/2009/11/queen-kittie.html

Like a few other people, I'm interested in how the baby gate kept the cats apart. Was it taller than a regular gate? I'm soon to be introducing a baby to our cat and would like to keep them apart, for obvious reasons.

(More on topic - we tried introducing a second cat to our household once, and it was a huge disaster. Our first cat literally went on a hunger strike until we found a new home for the newcomer. It was extremely stressful to all cats and people involved.)

I had to go on an overnight conference the day I brought a new cat into the house, there was drama before I left (which is an amusing story also)... but when I got home the next day it was to find them totally in love with each other.

@amiebarber8:

I've read that it's usually (though not always) better to adopt a cat this is younger than the cat you already have. Maybe it's something about younger cats being more willing to take a subordinate role in the heirarchy or something. But then again, I guess it depends on whether Abby Road is still rambunctious and playful by the time you're ready to adopt. If she's calmed down a bit, an older cat could work. So maybe the most important thing is to find a cat with a complimentary personality?

We did it with two bitchy Calico's. We each had one. We were really nervous and thought it would never work! It took all of 24 hours before they were playing chase and hanging out on the bed together go figure. It all depends on the cat(s) I believe.

We clearly didn't go about this the right way. After 10 years together, our two cats still can't stand each other. And when we adopted a puppy four years ago, one of the cats took to sleeping with the neighbor's daughter, until we lured her back home with consistent offerings of extra special wet food.

@mangabanga I had a similar problem when my hubby introduced a dog to our two kitties. One cat adapted fine, the other not so much. After two years of peeing over everything and spastic, aggressive behavior, we took him to a vet with a specialty in cat behavior. It was a long consultation, but after a month on calming pills, we had a much more calm and happy cat.

Brought in a 3rd cat in December of 08. My older male cat liked her, but would mount her every once in a while. The second, who is an adorable bitch, didn't want anything to do with her. It took months for them to start playing with each other. Even today, over a year later, Clem, the middle one, will stop her playing and swat the crap out of Toots, the newest one. Just to show that that she might love her, but she sure don't like her.

When I was younger we got a second cat to keep our first cat that we had had for several years then company. It didnt go well. They didnt fight but the young one was clearly scared and would pee on the sofa (which was brand new!). We gave her to the vet for a few days so see if she would pee somewhere also and it she was fine. We finaly decided to give her away again (the vets assistance fell in love with her and gave her a good new home). I do think if you have had just one pet for a long time who is used to being alone it will be difficult to bring in a new one.

When we got new cats 2 years ago we got brothers so as they could keep eachother company and not have to introduce one at a later point.

btw: I think it's great that apartment therapy has posts like these. Because homes are about so much more then just the newest living trends or the right wall color.

I'm with thistlefinch in wondering what this topic has to do with apartments or design.

Mangabanga, two recommendations: a book called Cat vs. Cat may be helpful to you. Secondly, somebody may need kitty prozac. They make it tuna-flavored, just for stressed-out cats. Talk to your vet about the behavior. She may have other ideas.

@Mangabanga - I sympathize. Been there.

I'd bet tho, as a "dog person", you let your pooch be the king of the hill - cats are interlopers /pup was here first, attitude. Unfortunately, it won't ever work.

I had to learn - If I REALLY wanted peace - not just hoping hubby will eventually get the message if you keep things as bad as you possibly can -

- you're going to have to change your attitude and your tactics.

Don't let the pup chase them, intimidate them in any way. A squirt bottle of water is the best, with a quick "off" command. Same for cats, not allowed to hiss and spit at dog for no reason. You may have to confine dog into a small 'exercise pen' while cats are allowed free. Then vice versa. Goal is for them them to be able to be in the same room and just ignore each other. Keep them separated when you are not there to supervise, or else all your hard work will evaporate each time.

Happy home is very possible. For all.

hard lesson learned: in keeping our new girl cat Mika isolated so our existing boy cat Widget didn't have to lose territory to an intruder right off, we put her into the guest room. Where she informed us of her displeasure in being locked up by constant crying and destroying the berber carpet in the doorway with her claws. $75 repair bill, since the house is new and I didn't want to DIY the job and mess it up.

The lesson? THINK about the solutions you come up with very carefully! This seemed perfect, but obviously wasn't. Thanks goodness they get along now, so these preacautions aren't needed... It did take several weeks, though, to get by the hissing and biting phase.

@mangabanga Your cats are afraid of your pug? I've only known one pug, but aren't they about the same size as cats, only with less scary claws? I'd think your pug would be scared of your cats!

My mom's dog (a Westie, similarly sized to a pug) got swiped once by our cat (who weighed the same as the dog). After that, the dog never bugged the cat again!

I r an affexionet n soshal 9 y.o. calico. Mama's friendz fownd a teeny lil stray in teh snow. She thawt dat becuz we was both so nice & loving that we'd git along. i hatez teh baby. i hizz n chase her rownd de partment. Jus cuz kats iz nice 2 hoomans not meen dey be nice to udder kats.

We took in a stray adult female cat two years. We had two others at the time. She has an anxiety problem, probably related to her time as a stray. Our vet put her on tranquilizers. It helped tremendously. After 6 months we tried to work her off but she started freaking out again. We tried again in 6 months and she is off medication. She is still a little neurotic, but they all manage to coexist comfortably. It's something you might want to try if you are feeling desperate.

lol, lemook!

I have two tom cats, both abandoned at our apartment complex. We adopted one first, and his friend (our second cat) would wait outside the door for us to let 1st cat out to play. I thought they must really love each other. They would prowl the neighborhood as a pair. Two years later, they still chase each other all over the place and fight. I think it's just playing, although it occasionally gets rough and requires some loud hand-clapping to make it stop. Just like kids, though, right? Even if they love each other, they are still going to fight, right? That's what I keep telling myself.

The only surefire way to make them love on each other is to drop the temperature in the house. When it gets cold, they inevitably call a truce and snuggle.

I too have to disagree with quiltmaster. In our case, out cats still doesnt get along even after two years.

Cats are individuals and apart from their personality there is also the difference in age, temperament and similiar that will affect how fast they accept other cats. Some cats will never accept another cat in the household, while others accept newcomers after just one day.

It's just like with humans - we all behave differently when we meet new people.

Introducing cats can so different. We had an 18 month old drama queen female and we bought in a laid back male kitten, she was mean to him, I was always rescuing him, it's ended up he is much bigger than her and that solved that problem. My big boy takes along time to get mad, but sometimes she gets him going and she pays for it and I have to save her, not very often thankfully.

Around 6 years ago I introduced a rescue cat to the mix, my drama queen female hated her, they would sleep together, but they always hissed at each other, sadly the rescue cat passed away last year suddenly. My drama queen has put weight back on and seems happier.

I wonder if anyone else has any experience with their children and the loss of a close pet. It's only 4 months since the cat passed away and my daughter who is 6 and consider the cat one of her friends still talks about her all the time and this weekend I found her crying in her room looking at photos of the cat, it's so heartbreaking.........we let her talk about the cat, we put some photos in lovely frames, we have a cross in the yard for the cat, we bought a necklace for her to remember her, she draws pictures and takes them for show and tell and she talks about the cat.................there is one thing I cannot do, is get another cat, due to my drama queen cat.

Anybody else experience such grief from a young child for such a long time?

Have you considered getting a rescue kitten?
We have a very petted/ jealous/ highly strung/ peco affected (eats material/ plastic bags etc) but loving neutered stray cat whom we have had since he was a kitten. When he was 3 or 4 we found another several week old kitten. He was a tiny little fella with mites and gunky eyes due to an infection, so we kept him in a cardboard box for a couple of days until the vet gave him the ok. All the while the cat is sniffing at the box, peaking in, listening to the new mews etc. When we introduced them the cat was a bit put out at first but soon took to mothering the kitten- grooming and cleaning him. They are now like peas in a pod, who spend several hours a day grooming and snuggling along side a healthy hour of so of play fighting to fill the day when they are not snoozing.
Is your drama cat speyed? What sex and age was the rescue cat? If they were of similar age she may have felt threatened or if she may feel that while she can put up with the other fella another one just pushed her over the edge.
You could try fostering a rescue kitten... drama cat`s mothering instinct may kick in or the big fella may take on this role, leaving drama cat to her own devices. By fostering rather than adopting you can watch the dynamics without worrying too much if it all goes pear shaped.
Of course, explain to your daughter that the rescue centre is always looking for temporary moms and that she has been chosen for an exciting new project to bring up a kitten for a few months. It will take her mind off the loss of the rescue and if it works out ok I`m sure the rescue centre would be happy for you to adopt the growing kitten.
It is only natural for her to cry over the loss of the rescue, but it is an important life lesson that she will get over. If she has lost a close family member or if anyone in the family has been ill she may be transferring this grief/ fear onto the death of the rescue. I am sure you are doing all you can to help her.
The following kids books all deal with the issue to death. Perhaps another reader can recommend one of the books personally?
http://www.best-childrens-books.com/childrens-books-about-death.html

Good idea on the kitten, kindled. I have had both male and female cats over the years become very paternal to young kittens we adopted. One of our toms used to let our kitten "nurse" on him, rescue her when she climbed too high in trees, etc. He also taught her to hunt. My parents have a tom now who does the same thing to their kitten.