apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

i have my own side. although i always wake up to find his elbow in my head or something.

I have a weird and indescribable system of side-selection that involves proximity to doors and windows, neither of which I want to be near, but in a pinch, I'll sleep closer to the window than the door. I'm not sure when I developed this mysterious system, but it means that in our bedroom, I sleep on the right, but in other bedrooms, who knows. My husband lets me claim my side first when we stay at hotels or in someone else's home. He does claim that no matter what side I choose, I somehow end up sleeping in the smack middle of the bed.

West is west and East is east, and never the twain shall meet. He never steals the blankets, but he does steal the top sheet. Its some bizarre combination of macrame, sleep-ballet, and magic. The blanket stays perfectly positioned, but the sheets end up wound up and neatly tied in a square knot.

we each have our own side of the bed; however, i often get up in the middle of the night and sleep in the guest room if the snoring gets too loud.

I sleep better when my face is close to the edge of the mattress - I am convinced I breathe better. And I have some back problems that make it more comfortable to sleep on my left side. So I prefer the left side of the bed, when sharing. But I can cope with either as required (guest rooms, etc.)

I don't care what side I sleep on, as long as I get HALF of the bed. Which I find is impossible because he is a hugger, be it with arms or legs. If a bed is positioned against a wall, I can't sleep on that side because I'm claustrophobic.

I always pick the right side of the bed, unless there's a wall - then I pick whichever side is against the wall. The hubby and I do pretty well with our bed arrangement. We have just a full-size bed, but stick to our own sides. He snores very loudly, but as long as I can fall asleep before the snoring starts, I rarely wake up.

When we upgrade to a king-sized bed, oh what bliss that will be.

This post makes me think that we need to flip the mattress!

FF, my wife makes the same claim. We have to start out close to my end of the bed, so that she has a chance of staying on the bed at all.

You mean to say they are people that don't have a "side" and just sleep wherever they land each night - how weird is that... I need my own personal nesting spot that is the same night after night... I am joined by a number of small people throughout the night - but it is my side ... I just thought everyone had a side - their own consistent side!!!

In my current bedroom, I prefer the right side (as sleeping, left as viewing from the foot of the bed).

However, if the bed is against the wall on the side, I cant sleep next to the wall... and I usually prefer to face the door, for some reason.

-Ruth

i choose the side with the alarm clock on it, if I wake up in the middle of the night and cant see the time i freak out.... I am strange

My boyfriend and I sleep just fine together in his bed. I have my side, he has his. But when we sleep at my place he always ends up pushing me further to the edge until I have no place left to go. Our beds are both queens, but for some reason I can't sleep with him at my place.

i prefer good old-fashioned spooning when bf is over. :) otherwise, i just sleep on my side of the bed, the one away from the wall and then my 2 pups and cat pick their spots.

I take whichever side is furthest from the door/bathroom, since he gets up earlier during the work week.

I typically don't care what side of the bed that I am on, however my boyfriend prefers the left because it is close to the wall. By the morning I usually find that I have been moved (yes, not by my own volition) towards the middle of the bed entangled between him and the cat. The both are very into snuggling so they end up sandwiching me tightly.

A king sized mattress doesn't help us one bit. I would like to videotape my sleep activities sometime, because I manage to push the top sheet to his side and down to the foot of the bed, while pulling the very heavy comforter almost entirely off the bed on my side. Every night.

But otherwise, we do have our "own side" and gravitate toward the edges while we slumber, leaving a wide swath of mattress in between.

I don't care, but I usually end up on the right side of the bed because I think he prefers the right. Also, we do a lot of spooning, so we're both usually in the middle anyway. Sometimes, the dog is down by my legs, too... that makes it much harder! So... perhaps my greater personal difficulty is between me and the dog.

I have a side, though we do tend to cuddle in the middle. As soon as I'm up for more than 5 minutes, my fh has stolen either my side of the bed, my pillows or both. Also he has an odd quirk that he can't sleep with the top sheet tucked in - it makes keeping the bed neat an incredible pain.

KING SIZE BED! It's the only way to go.
More room to... snuggle!
Left side for me (right side if looking from foot of bed towards headboard).

We have sides. And when we wake up in the morning it looks like I haven't even slept on mine because I hardly move in my sleep, so all the covers are still tucked in at the bottom. But his side looks like it's been attacked by a rabid beast. Sheet torn off the mattress, blankets in knots etc.. I usually get an elbow in my face at some point in the night.

Ha! Different sleeping styles cause conflict but are easily cured.

Remedy:
Take 1 200 pound man. Add one 110 pound girl.
Mix with first cohabitation situation: a frat house room, un airconditioned, in the summer.
Top with bed: Regulation twin bed.

Fit these people amenably on this bed for three and half months, and there will never again be sleeping problems. We have been living together for 4 1/2 years now, and we still huddle in the middle of the bed. Might as well ditch our full for a twin.

I have the perfect solution! I use a common east Asian style of bedding which solves most of these problems- and some others; only a fitted sheet and two single duvets. Each person in the bed gets their own duvet. There are no sheets to steal and no blankets to steal. You also save a little money on bedding and can be more creative with your bedding by mixing and matching different duvet covers between the two of you. My husband and I have done this since we first started living together some 10 years ago. It is really a great solution!

Ahhh, the best of both worlds. At his place, we each have our side. Mine is the side with the blanket under the pillow, cause I need lots of pillow-ness to sleep comfortably. At my place, we tend to congregate (cuddle, spoon, etc.) in the middle because my bed is weird and somehow sinks in the middle if two people try sleeping on either side (though it's fine with just one person).

On the flip side, I do highly enjoy sleeping alone and being able to sprawl out diagonally on my bed. :D

I've noticed that we have a "sides" for sleeping, eating, camping, and dining out.

In bed, I'm to his left at his house and mine; at the dining table, I'm to his right at his house and mine; when we dine out, I'm always on the right if we're at a sushi bar.

When we go camping, if it's really cold I'm the 'inside' spoon. If it's really warm, I'm the 'outside' spoon.

I think it's funny that we habituated these positions pre-consciously. And if it gets mixed up, I'm weirded out.

k_darling, I don't think that's odd at all. I always have to go around the whole bed in a hotel to untuck the sheet. Otherwise it feels way too constraining, I can't move my feet and I can't sleep

Usually it's the dog taking up one half of the bed, and my boyfriend and I on the other half. Luckily the bigger dog sleeps in the guest room! I have to have my alarm clock. I usually end up fighting for blankets too!

He has a side. I need the side with a nightstand for keeping glasses, pills, etc. If we are staying someplace where the only night stand is on "his" side, all hell breaks loose!

I agree with Aariel. I cannot sleep with a sheet tucked in the bed. I could care less which side of the bed I sleep on but my feet have to be sticking out of the sheets and blankets or I start to feel claustrophobic.

We're fine cuddling as long as it's warm enough. I think there was one time that my husband snuggled me right off the bed when it was cold. I must confess to kicking him a bit when he snores, so that he'll change position and stop. But he hasn't figured it out yet, so we're OK.

Add two cats and things are a bit more complicated. The little one likes to perch on my legs or feet; I have no idea why she finds it comfortable. But often in the middle of the night I open my eyes to notice her 'sailing' up and down as I roll over. Then I try not to kick them; a lot of times I do these weird movements to let them have their space, and then I'll realize they're not even on the bed.

You know you're out of college when you'd no longer think of shacking up in a twin bed.

On my twin air mattress I do not have a side. The cats on the other hand sit on my chest and behind my legs. I toss and turn and wake up different every morning. I also do the fitted sheet and blanket only system. Top sheets are just something to get tangled in.

At his house, or anyone's, I sleep on the side away from the door. It's a protected feeling thing for me. And once that side is chosen it can NOT change!

And if you couldn't guess by the twin air bed, he doesn't stay at my house.

And yes, I'm in college. The twin bed is a definite tell of that.

I sleep alone and enjoy it - I get to sleep in the middle of the bed with all the pillows and nobody is there to snore or hog the covers...

...I'm thinking that when I get married again, separate beds (with occassional visitation) may not be such a bad idea.

i always assumed everyone picked a side... people dont?? I usually take the right (looking at the bed) because i end up sleeping on my left. we just recently moved the bed against the wall, and i took the left side (looking at the bed, the side against the wall) partly because my husband gets up early for work and now he wont wake me up.

i dont really care for sleeping against the wall, but I just dont care as much as I used to.

I second the suggestion of a fitted sheet and two seperate duvets. It's the only way my husband and I can survive! I throw my legs out at night and bundle up my head and shoulders. He wraps his feet and leaves his shoulders exposed. One cover and neither of us are happy. Two covers and we're cuddled and cozy all night long.

Try it, you'll like it.

I'm currently single and I sleep on the right side of the bed but towards the middle.

When I was with my last boyfriend I would sleep on the left side of the bed because the right side was 'his'. Unfortunately the left side was against the wall and the alarm clock was on the right side. He didn't have a job (and didn't seem to want to get another) and I had morning shifts. I'm the type that likes to hit the snooze button like 6 times before I actually get up. I wouldn't do it that many times while with him but it would drive me crazy that I would have to reach over him to get to it.

And then when I would need to get out I'd have to crawl over him. Which always bugged me because if I slept on the right side I wouldn't have to deal with that. I never thought I had a side but thinking about it every other boyfriend I had I've slept on the right side and even when I change where the bed is (putting the right side is near the wall) I still sleep on the right.

I sleep on the part of the bed to the wall. It's practical to me, as if something were to ever happen (a break-in, etc.) My boyfriend could jump up and protect us without having to climb over me. Also, he sleeps less than I do, so its nice not to have him walking all over me.

Before I met him and we started co-habitating I always slept in a single bed with no room for "sides"

I'm not so much as a side but I like sleeping closer to the bedroom door. It's mostly out of convenience - I get up more in the night and I always get up earlier, plus that's where the alarm clock is. I just can't sleep well facing a wall or window.

Now on the sharing, I tend to get a third of the bed while he sprawls out on the other 2/3rds - sadly we only have a full. We so need to upgrade to a queen at least. I always manage to kick the blanket off while staying under the top sheet if it's just me in bed for some reason - but when he's in there, I might as well just hand him the covers since he takes them. I may have to try out the separate twin blankets suggestion.

My ex and I were completely incompatible in sleeping styles. In the morning I would hear that I scooted around the bed, hogged the covers, moved to his side of the bed, kicked and thrashed all night, moved my legs and arms all weird, and essentially kept him awake. We also had "sides" and stuck to them, no matter where we were.

My partner now is a dream - our sleeping styles are so perfect. No numb tingling arms, uncomfortable snuggling positions, and complete flexibility, even in our own bedroom - it all depends on our mood, and the position of the cat. I've also never heard a single complaint with the new guy about any of my previous "oddities" - I described them, he says none of that has appeared. So. I guess I found my perfect sleep partner. :)

I sleep on the open side and he sleeps by the windows. I get up earlier so it makes it easier for me to get up without disturbing him. He also has a much higher body temp so the cool air from the windows keeps him comfortable and would make me too cold.

When we travel I like to deliberately switch sides just to mix things up. It adds to the feel of being somewhere new and different.

if the bed is pushed against the wall then I must sleep on the outside.

My sweetie and I keep separate bedrooms, for a wide variety of reasons, but often sleep together. In his room, I sleep on the right. In mine, I sleep on the left. It's to do with things like where the sunlight is, where the lights are. I wake up to an alarm; he doesn't, so whichever side is within arm's reach of the alarm is mine. In his room, the left side is near the door, and I just can't sleep that close to the door. Etc.

Sounds like a lot of us could almost get accustomed to what we see in old tv shows - where the couple has twin beds with just "visits" to the other bed occasionally. Would be a great space saver since you could just get bunkbeds - LOL.

I have to have the side with the door. I cannot sleep with my face covered or anything in front of it so I guess I lump the wall with that. The sides we sleep on switch depending on where the bed is in relation to the door. I thought I was a right side sleeper but that has changed to the left side with bedroom rearrangements. My husband swears he has to sleep on his left side but that has switched along with the bed. It works for us keeping our backs warm but also gives me a great excuse for kicking him when he snores.

I have to have the side that faces out into the room or I get claustrophobic. Now that our bed is in the middle of the room and not against a wall, it doesn't matter much, but "my" side (with the nightstand with my stuff) faces the wall with the windows. This works well enough since he hates light when he is sleeping. I also have to know what time it is before I can fall asleep... yay for being compulsive. We start the night snuggling, but usually end up on opposite sides with the cats in the middle by morning!