apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

Curtains. He hates them b/c they block the light. We have beautiful huge victorain windows, and I would love to do long sheers, but even that blocks too much light for him, so we've gone without, so far.
Don't know if that's our "biggest" comprimise, but one that's been on my mind lately.

My husband tends to let me do what I want with the apartment because I work from home (and do all the housework) and he works outside, though there were years when I accepted that he wanted big speakers in our tiny living room (though it would be impossible to position them properly in a 9' x 9' room). When our tuner died, the speakers left the room (currently, they're in the closet).

My main compromise is I accept (removable) hooks over the woodwork in the bedroom so he can come home and just hang things all over the place rather than put them away (as it's more effort than he wants to go to when he's tired). When we have guests, I can put everything away and remove the hooks, but usually, clothes are hanging along one wall of the bedroom for his convenience and this would not be my preference.

Hmmm. Yeah I'm totally not mature enough yet to live with a significant other. :P

Also an audio related compromise: when Mr. DJ announced he was going to get back in practice spinning vinyl, I cringed. I love him and his music, but those turn-tables do not fit in with what I'm going for in our new place: traditional, arts and crafts inspired decor - and they take up a lot of room! The compromise: he cleaned out his closet... and created a built-in turn table set up. I sacrificed some of our shared storage space so his clothes had some place to go, and now we're back to squabbling over where we store the vacuum.

My husband and I have a rule that we must both agree on any home item before it can be installed or placed permanently. This really delays the process, but at least we both feel like we have a voice. I should probably just give in to him since he has the design background, but I definitely do not. Oh, and I'm winning the battle of no TV in the bedroom due to this rule!

Garbage and Dishes - He doesn't do either.

We have got into many tiffs about this before, but not sure it's worth it anymore.

oh man. for the most part my bf lets me do whatever i want. but he does have the "this was free" or "cheap" gene in his body. so he has a lot of hand me down ugly chairs and lamps that no one wants to see. right now they are banished to the basement. but once i am done framing that out i am throwing them out!

My wife's electronic and computer room. It's full of computers and parts, the furniture is all unpainted pine wood and there are no decoration and it's her territory. It's an ugly room but in exchange unless she really hates something she is ok with the paint choice and the decorations in the rest of the house and willing to build shelves and buy whatever is need.

TV in the living room -- I hate it, but she really wanted it, and I caved. But slowly I am purging the glass & metal ikea furniture (she's a metalsmith, and more "industrial" in her tastes -- I'm more "ethno"...). She occasionally makes noises against my stereo & books, but there I hold the line. Guys & their stereos, huh? Growing up, my dad's stereo was exiled to the hall closet, with the toggle-buckle galoshes and the coats....

My girlfriend and I also have a policy of agreeing to changes in the apartment before we implement them. Funny enough, and maybe this is one reason we're together, we have nearly the same taste in design/color, so decisions are often easy.

That said, my biggest compromise is her dog. Her biggest compromise (I think?) is my scavenged pieces of industrial junk and deer skull I found while walking with a best friend.

I'm moving in with my bf next weekend so this is perfect timing! For the most part, we have very similar styles and tastes in decor and we're both very clean.

He really wants a huge TV and I'm trying my hardest to keep it to 42".

He'll have to put up with me moving furniture all the time. It's a disease!

I haven't moved in with my significant other yet (we'll be doing that shortly) but already we're talking about compromise. If ever there was a real life Dharma & Greg, that would be us. I'm hippyish and love color and funky shapes and mixing styles, and he's more of a traditional/modern kinda guy - clean lines and nothing more outrageous than a tonal print on a brocade fabric found in the tv room. We've already preliminarily compromised on the office wall color - I want a dark pinkish-red on all four walls and black accents, while he doesn't want it at all. So we've compromised down to 2 of the 4 walls. Oh, and typicalstudent reminded me that he's already compromised on my cat - he knows my animals aren't going anywhere, especially the cat.

Other than paint colors, dimmers. I like on-off, he likes dimmers, and we hashed it out in the aisles for weeks until we settled on an on-off switch with a little dimmer slider along the side. It was our biggest compromising success; angels sing every time we turn one on to this day. (Not so much the chili-colored bathroom wall.)

My favorite story is when my mid-century loving friend's new husband brought home a six-piece, unreturnable mission-style living room set (couch and all) from a Restoration Hardware warehouse sale last year. It was so pricey, they had to keep it, but boy does he know chapter and verse of her style preferences now!

Wall color. My old condo was a really light grey that I loved, but when we bought a place together he wouldn't do the grey (even though I think it would have looked amazing!) Now we have what I like to call "compromise beige" in most of the place. It wasn't the first (or even second) choice for either one of us, but it was the only one we could agree on. It's worked out better than I thought though, but still doesn't feel like me.

My gf and I have very different tastes when it comes to furniture and decor, her style being much more colorful and eclectic, mine being very muted, clean, and simple. We've sort of managed to find a middle ground and our tastes have definitely influenced each other, with a couple of items I once found horrendous actually growing on me.

I can't decide if conflict of tastes is made easier or harder based of the fact that we are dirt poor and cannot afford a damned thing; on one hand, it keeps our options so limited that there isn't much to discus half the time, and on the other, if we actually had the means, it is quite likely we would be able to find pieces and things that we both love. But anyhow, there are far fewer decisions to be made, and fought over, when you haven't the means

The dreaded PS3! Not being able to pry him away to eat dinner sometimes is extremely annoying! As for myself, I love revamping wonderful old furniture! Every time I find a new treasure he makes snide comments about clutter. In my defense, I get rid of something every time I bring in a new piece! As for advice on co-habitating with your main squeeze, always be able to humor each other. You don't have to win every fight to be taken seriously.

Clocks, mechanical banks, and tin toys

The place is small but there are at least two clocks in every room except the bathroom.

I've relegated all banks to a hallway bookshelf and all tin toys to high shelves that run the perimeter of the living room.

No more purchases! I tried that 'as one thing enters another must leave' rule and it did not work out.

Of course, I have about five different coffee making machines - all of which brew very different, equally important cups of coffee / espresso.

We've been living together for a couple of months, and despite some minor fights, I think we're doing great. I sacrificed my dream wedding (or just getting married, for that matter) and he... well, it should be him who says it.
We've found ways of making it work, such as coming up with "traditions" (weekend breakfast, new recipe saturday...) that make a little but important difference to avoid routine. Also, we just started a blog to share all the things we're discovering since moving in together, such as how to live a little bit greener, make a joint budget, how to cook meatballs from scratch (that post is a work in progress) or how to put together a home that doesn't look untidy or random but it doesn't look like a museum.
It has become a nice way to spend time together working on a project.


If you want to check it out, http://www.wetakeiteasy.com

I put up with his mountains of books (which I consider clutter) and Red Sox stuff and my husband tolerates the girl dog. The boy dog, other dog on the other hand, he has adopted as his own. Oh and Lo1221, I totally empathize about the PS3!

Mine are the grey walls (blech and yawn) and the 3 desks in the loft that he made (out of metal pipes painted cream and hunks of painted wood on top), along with the 3 monitors that live on his desk.

His would probably be my ever-growing collection of craft supplies, and my need to have knick-knacks (a family photo or two isn't bad, you know).

the mister wants all natural light completely blocked at all times.
I, however, am not a vampire and love sunlight.

shades up, shades down, shades up, shades down etc..
that is my life. sigh.

good thing I love him.

Mike and I took the path of least resistance; we sold all of his stuff and all of my stuff on craigslist and started over together. Sure we kept the odd piece but the furnishings have been almost completely overhauled: http://www.torontolife.com/features/orange-crush/

I would LOVE my apartment to be all white (concrete or white epoxy floor, chrome, minimal). He likes warmer colors. We've gone with a neutral palette with pops of color... orange rug, vases, paintings, bedding, etc.

The result may not be my first choice but, it is amazing.

My mom gave us this painting of the sea. I would have painted right over it, but he says that it reminds him of his hometown in England. Every time he has someone visit from back home, they nod in agreement. It can stay.

He puts up with my compulsive filing. ("Where's my bank statement?" "In your yellow B of A folder, Sweetie." "I have a B of A folder?"). And attempts to relegate his books to the back of the shelf.

Mostly cleaning rituals and having the A/C on when he's steaming hot and I'm freezing cold. I'd rather put on more clothes than have a sweaty bed.

I'm trying to be more lax about how much I expect in terms of cleaning the apartment, but I do get little bouts of rage when I find food wrappers in the coffee table or on our desk.

I wish my biggest problem was a piece of electronic equipment--that I could handle. My husband and I are complete opposites an control freaks, so our renovation has dragged on forever. I started a blog about it just to keep my sanity: renovationwars.wordpress.com.
I am a design junkie who likes a clean, modern, but colorful look; he wants everything to be beige and traditional. This is a man who wanted to tile our living room floor and once actually said to me when I suggested buying a vintage piece, "No, because then everything would have to be antiques. You can't mix modern stuff with antiques." Sigh.