apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

How small is small? I lived in an apt in my youth on Beacon Hill in Boston that had a kitchen about 6x4ft. Most of that was sink, stove & one tiny square of counter. The fridge was around the corner in the dining/living room. The place had high ceilings and great light and is still one of my fave apts, although the landlord never did any maintenance.

There was NO room for a dishwasher in there. Or much room for dishes, either. The good aspect--it forced me to wash dishes immediately after using them (or stick in the oven overnight). The oven was barely big enough to roast a chicken!

Never had a dishwasher and most likely never will. Always seemed overkill for only 2 people. I recall my mother wheeling out the old dishwasher for our family of 5 back in the 70's. It was a chore hooking it up to the sink each time but she was so proud to finally have one. After about 6 months the luxury wore off and it was never used again.
She kept it in its cabinet recess though - I guess the idea of having it never faded.

I lived without a dishwasher for many years and swore by handwashing to get my glassware crystal-clear and spot-free. Come wintertime, sinking my hands in the warm, soapy water was not so much a chore as something I looked forward to after a long, chilly day...

That was before I met my husband, who relied on his machine to do the dirty work. Eventually, he brought me around to his way of thinking and now, in our new house, I don't know that I would want to live without our dishwasher. It saves me lots of time (we're now a blended family of six) and water, too!

On the other hand, our house features a Jacuzzi tub as well - a luxury I would rather do without. I am secretly looking forward to the day that it breaks down so that we can replace it with an old claw-foot. All those pumps and tubes seem like more hassle than their worth, I can't use bath oil, salts or bubbles, and the drone of the motor creeps me out too much to turn it on.

This is not, mind you, a newly built or expensive custom home - it's a 1928 colonial that we bought from a bank and rehabbed. The tub was there when we bought it, and I can't figure out why the previous owners installed that darned thing while neglecting to do anything about foundation and roof leaks, the fallen 10' retaining wall, dangerous wiring and ancient furnace. A jetted bath must have been more necessity than luxury to them!

I'm pretty sure I would consider a dishwasher and a washer/dryer a necessity if I was doing that stuff for more than just myself. I don't want kids though and if I get married chores will be egalitarian. So, handwashing and the laundromat (as long as it's close) isn't a big deal. I also thought I'd miss a garbage disposal a lot more than I do.

I also don't consider television to be a necessity as long as there's internet and a computer. One can always watch DVDs or download movies and TV shows and that's more than enough for me.

I do, however, consider central air to be a necessity where I live in the Midwest, even though some don't. Those window air conditioners just don't cut it (they're also eyesores to boot). If you share living quarters with a mate, tempers seem to rise with the temperature. Maybe that was just us / me though.

Horror story? I remember when my mom bought a very old, very large house with a very inefficient furnace. She kept the temperature just high enough to keep the pipes from freezing. Seeing your breath in the living room was common and friends didn't take off their coats when they visited. I developed this method of using blankets I called "The Taco": wrap body with a comforter and a blanket to line tucked in on the sides and layer a larger comforter over top to pull over your head to keep your face warm. I might be moving into an eco-progressive group house with a wood-burning stove in January though, so I have a feeling I'm going to be reviving The Taco again. It's not so bad though. Keeping the heater at 75 in the dead of winter is not a necessity. Being able to sit around in the living room without a parka is, though. :)

After lugging laundry (for two) 8 blocks to the "good" laundomat in NYC, I now consider my washer and dryer (in the kitchen) an essential. The perfect apartment sans en suite laundry would be a deal breaker to me now (in a rental). That said, if there was a hookup and I was buying-as opposed to renting- that would be fine.

I should make clear, bernat, that our household duties are split fairly:)

We also choose not to own a television. Television didn't play a big role in either of our childhoods, and it just isn't a big deal around here either. We have found some great educational shows and games for the kids on the internet, and we often use our computer for cozy Monty Python marathons in bed after they've gone to sleep!

One luxury we have allowed ourselves recently is weekend newspaper delivery. While we can get all the news we need right here on the internet, nothing beats curling up on the couch on a sunday morning with a cup of coffee and a stack of unwieldy newsprint!

Our thermostat is set at 60 degrees during the day, and once we get a programmable one it'll kick down to 57 automatically during our sleeping hours. My dad always kept it this way when I was growing up and his response to our complaints about the chill was always "put on a sweater!". Wool socks and thick sweaters are a necessity around here!

We have central air now, but have not yet had the need to run it (moved in in August). I don't expect we'll use it much even in the summer months, though. I like sticky heat!

And oh, AC is a necessity too. One time mine died and I was in a heat wave for a week without one, and I slept on my patio in a hammock because it was too hot inside. That, actually, was really nice and fun, but it would have been better if it was optional, as opposed to completely necessary.

I have three things that could be considered luxuries, but that I would NOT want to be without.

1) a washer and dryer in my apartment: this was a deal breaker for me when I was scouting for an apartment --- I hate doing laundry so much, that to add having to lug everything up and down three flights of stairs and to a laundromat was too much for me.

2) high speed internet -- it's my one window into the outside world, I use my computer as my radio, tv, dvd player, and newspaper as well as a place to check email and comment on AT

3) A/C -- I've lived without it in California (which was fine), Seattle (which was fine), and Pennsylvania (which was NOT fine, but I lived) -- but I can't even contemplate a Dallas summer in a 3rd floor apartment without central air.

The dishwasher and the air conditioning are pretty much essentials - I don't think I could deal without. The TV and at least one of our computers would have to stay since we (fiance and I) love gaming and love movie nights. It's just not the same trying to watch a movie on a tiny laptop screen versus the larger flat panel TV.

I also love having laundry hookups, but it's something we could live without. I know I could live without the garbage disposal since I don't use it all that much. We don't use the heat as much as people would think. I much prefer just adding a sweater and some thick socks to my outfit than waste the electricity. Now if I'm cold enough to bury myself in blankets, it gets turned on.

@ tmoore-- holy c***, 60 degrees? Wow, we use our AC a lot, but it stays at about 78. AC is most definitely a necessity here in Houston. We use it almost year round. We could probably live without a heater, but it's nice to have. Agree laundry is a must-have. Four years of hauling laundry in college was enough!

Other Must-haves:
Dishwasher. I hate doing dishes, esp. when I forget to remove something for the fridge. I don't wanna touch that.

TV. I watch a lot of tv and use it as background noise too. I feel too alone and creeped out without the tv on.

I don't take baths and I won't, so a shower is a requirement.

Cable. Not only for variety, but for picture quality.

I grew up in a middle-lower middle class single-parent family. We always had what we needed, just not always what we wanted. We at times we had to cut the cable or share meals if we got to eat out. We never went without necessities, but I was always aware that my mom worried about money. I can definitely be um, frugal. I don't worry about having the newest technology or trends, and it's also made me aware of the importance of savings.

Necessity; high speed internet. I caved and downgraded to DSL vs. broadband and though a little slower, it is infinitely better than waiting on dial-up, which makes me want to pull out all my eyelashes.

AC is a must here in Miami. Ours went down once and those were the longest, hottest four days of my life!

If my husband ever divorces me, I am going to hide the Tivo in a vault until he is gone because I am hooked on watching TV without commercials (keeps me from buying unecessary things and saves a lot of time since I can fast forward through a program).

I have learned that I really don't need new shoes all the time or new clothes. I 've become quite thrifty in that area. I don't do trends so my clothes move through the times pretty well. I've given up getting manicures and pedicures and do it myself, which is time consuming, but I would rather buy a great chair if I saw one in a thrift shop! Eating out is over and I am experimenting a lot in the kitchen. My husband actually said he finds he likes my cooking a lot better than a lot of the food we used to eat out!

bernat, you are not alone. My father was very bad at remembering to pay the oil bill and once a month every month after October you could expect to waking up to a 25 degree house (which also meant the water was cold!). After my sister got older she got fed up and made my father give her the money and she paid on time, but there is nothing worse than feeling like someone put your bed outside while you were sleeping. Oh, bless him, he was so kind, but so absentminded:)

After leaving my washer and dryer for an apartment without one, that is an extreme necessity for my next place. Begging for change in quarters, lugging around giant loads, waiting to wash clothes until there's enough to validate a whole trip, never having enough money to wash work pants AND kitchen towels... yes, there will be laundry facilities. And I'll keep the dishwasher and garbage disposal. TV- not necessary, back yard with a fence - necessary for the big dog, and central air if I'm still in Texas - definitely necessary.

Dishwasher, W/D, A/C
I could probably live without internet, since i live in an urban area with lots of free access, but i'd rather not.

After being transferred from Dallas to Los Angeles I was surprised at what little amenities apartments have here.

My 1-bedroon apartment in Dallas had reserved covered parking, dishwasher, full sized washer/dryer, garbage disposal and central A/C and heat. I din't live in the suburbs either, I lived in the gayborhood of Oak Lawn, think West Hollywood. I paid $650 a month for that 4 years ago.
Now I have a 1-bedroom in Long Beach that I pay $1100 a month for and it doesn't have any modern conveniences and only street parking. I miss central a/c, I live on the coast and it does get hot and humid here. The window unit I installed doesn't cut it. Plus, the power goes out if I run the a/c and hair dryer or microwave at the same time. My dishes pile up and so does my laundry since 8 apartments share 1 washer and dryer. Both bumpers of my car are beaten up from people hitting them while trying to parallel park.

The trade off? I now live 2 blocks from the beach in a wonderful historic neighborhood that I feel safe walking in after dark. I'm within walking distance to shops, salons, grocery store, bars, restaurants, coffee shops, etc, etc. During the fall and winter after the leaves have fallen off the tree in front of my window I even have an ocean view.

@bernat, I was with you on the dishwasher/washer/dryer philosophy, thinking I don’t really need them for one person, won’t have kids, and am into egalitarianism. However, my guy uses a lot of dishes when he cooks (he used to be known for dirtying up every dish in the house, but he has too much stuff to be able to do that now). And he cooks a lot and eats it all. He also sweats a lot, is big, and likes his clothes oversized, so there’s three times as much laundry as I make by myself. I’m very glad we have a clothes washer and really wish we had a dishwasher. We don’t need a dryer, though; we use drying racks.

We keep it as cold as I can stand in the winter and as hot as he can stand in the summer. If one of us finds we have no energy at all, either splatted in a chair in summer or curled in a tiny ball under the covers in winter, it’s time to adjust the temperature. Where I live, fans are a necessity in the summer. Most people find AC to be a necessity, and we don’t really need the heater except for a few weeks in the winter.

Covered parking is pretty important here, too, because the sun is quite damaging to car interiors and we have frequent hail storms.

A computer, fast internet service, music playing devices, and a digital camera are luxuries I love. I also want enough floor space to be able to dance in, so I want a big living room.

I do without a cell phone, a pocket computer (iPod Touch, Palm, etc.), and a TV (though I do watch rented movies and TV shows on the computer). I also do without supposed luxuries such as granite countertops (pretty, but they make it too easy for me to break things!), new cars (expensive, with expensive insurance, and it makes me too paranoid about dings and stains), make-up (pretty, but smelly and smeary), salon cuts (with the panic every time your stylist moves on—I cut my own hair now) and, like cliokitty, up-to-date rather than classic clothing and manicures.

the definition of necessities and luxuries depends upon your lifestyle, career, where you live, etc. since my job requires that i be online everyday, an internet connection is a necessity. Also my wife & i are busy professionals & like to spend our time together not doing household chores so a dishwasher is a necessity. tv & cable, another necessity as we both teach cinema/media studies. have lived in the south & can attest that ac is a definite necessity. i consider it a necessity in the humid new england summertime too. luxuries for us mainly revolve around time. it seems there's never enough of it. & oh a claw foot tub another one.

Nobody needs A/C here in San Francisco.
I could survive without a dishwasher since I've done it before.
I haven't had a microwave in a decade.
I'd prefer a laundry in unit, but as long as there's one on the same floor as I have now I'm fine.

However whenever contemplating a new place, I absolutely must have huge windows on at least two sides of the apartment with views plus a balcony or terrace, sizable closets, a decently roomy kitchen, 2 bedrooms or a bedroom and a den, and be within walking distance to shops and public transit.

Love to have but can live without: washer, dryer, dishwasher, nice bathtub

Necessary luxuries: a car per person, central AC (this could also be categorized "things about Dallas that I hate")

Refuse to give up: FiOS

Completely unessential: garbage disposal, pantry, cable tv

I'm starting to consider things that I currently don't have necessities. I've started bringing my laundry with me to visit my parents about every other week, they live almost two hours away. My apartment has coin-op in the basement, which is common for Providence. But the dryer never dries the clothes fully, making it more expensive. And our basement is the creepiest basement ever. And I've decided it's definitely haunted. SO, after this place it is an absolute necessity to have NON coin-op laundry in the house/apartment. I will never go into a scary ass basement to do my laundry ever again.

High speed internet, my pet cat, fresh coffee beans, cold-processed soap, and having no roommates are my necessary luxuries. I'd love to have w/d in my unit, but am fine with having them in the building at least.

I didn't grow up with cable or dishwashers, so I consider these to be luxuries. I have window A/C units but only use them when it's sweltering..

We moved from a brand new house to an 1960's bungalow 2 years ago. While I love the charm of our current home, central location, and huge yard, what I miss about our last home is a fireplace & dishwasher. Living in a chilly climate, I miss the luxury of warming up by the fire on a colder winter evening.

Must haves: Great light, kitchen counter space and storage. And of course our pets.

Luxury item must haves: DVR, internet, Coffee machine, and cell phone with internet.

Luxury items we could do without: Dishwasher, Coffee grinder and machine,

Things we could do without: We only need one car, right now we have laundry in the basement of our building and it isn't that bad (although, I hope to never go to a laundry mat again), I've never lived in a place with AC or really a thermostat for that matter, and recently we've been living without our microwave and we've survived.

Unnecessary/Unwanted:

TV
AC
Garbage Disposal
Microwave
Dryer
Land Line
Car

On my wish list:

Dishwasher
Washing machine
Bathtub/larger shower
Radiant floor heating
Better landlord
Large dog/yard

I have been living in an apartment without W/D, dishwasher, disposal, land line, car, television for over a year now and have discovered that I really just wish I had a small dishwasher and a washing machine sans dryer. My boyfriend cooks every meal and I am constantly doing dishes by hand. We also have no car or a close laundromat so we either have to walk over a mile or take the bus to do laundry. We also shower in a disgusting 2' x 2' stall that the landlords refuse to improve or replace which really makes bathing a horrible experience.

Plenty of natural light is my #1 priority when looking for a new place to live.

Fortunately, I've never lived in a place where I had to leave the premises to wash clothes. I can't imagine what a pain that would be to haul your stuff across town, not to mention that I almost always do some other house project while I'm doing laundry. And I'm thankful that I haven't had to collect quarters for laundry in quite some time.

And sometimes we take things for granted, like plumbing being behind walls. We stayed at a friend's grandmother's flat in Paris (I know, boohoo for me), and the shower, which was tiny, had exposed pipes! My husband had to actually step out of the shower to turn around, because if he didn't, he'd run into the hot water pipe and burn himself! We've decided to remember it as "charming."

@lbc - really, an air-conditioner in Long Beach? I'm a native, and never had a/c, never minded. Huh.

Now that I'm married with a baby, in-home laundry is key. But our real necessity is our home library. We carved a dining area out of the living room at our new place so we could use the dining room for our books. We're both writers.

Things I have and need: bidet toilet, dishwasher, washer/dryer, trash compactor, central air, microwave.

Things I don't have and don't need: stereo, MP3 or iPod, high speed internet, cable, lap top, designer clothes/shoes, new car, cell phone, multiple tvs and hot tub which I got rid of a couple years ago.

Guess I need creature comforts and NOT toys.

ricestein, if you grow up with central a/c as I did, than you really miss it. Plus, I have 4 neighbors that all choose to smoke outside and their stink gets into my apartment. With central a/c I wouldn't care if they smoked.

This is very interesting to me because my husband and I had very different views on this and we are both moving towards middle ground.

His must have luxuries when we met were: organic veggies, dark roast free trade gourmet coffee, he's a programmer so also fast internet and computers with lots of memory, nice wine every day, an in-home washer and dryer, a dishwasher, lavish gifts for his sister and parents for birthdays and christmas.

My necessary luxuries when we met were: to be able to eat three meals every day, washer and dryer in the apartment building, a close bus stop, being able to walk to a park and the grocery store, a land-line, my library card, reading, sending birthday cards and christmas gifts to my family.

He is getting used to budgeting, he actually enjoys it now, and I am getting used to the in-home washer and dryer, dishwasher, a tv (no cable but we watch videos and play video games), lots of computer memory, a pull out kitchen faucet, wall oven, a backyard, and desserts.

Necessary luxuries I want but don't have are a wood burning fireplace, a vegetable garden, an entrance from the dining room to the back yard, a sun room, a second bathroom, a car, and a baby (or two).

Luxuries I don't need or want but do have would be the jacuzzi bath; I never use the motor, it came with the house, and I prefer to have showers.

Another difference for us was that he needed to listen to music, buy music and play music. These things had been luxuries for me. I did own a few records, but otherwise never bought CD's, nor did I own a stereo.

I think it depends on what city you are living in. All these appliances are rare in San Francisco rentals in buildings with character:
1. a/c (not necessary)
2. washer/dryers in the apt (but once you do, you can't go back to sharing or laundromats)
3. dishwashers (not standard, nor hard to find if you demand one)
4. garaged parking space (the ultimate luxury!)

Try living in Tallinn, Estonia in a former Soviet apartment block (built by German WWII POWs) with a two burner gas stove, a 1950s dorm fridge with a freezer that only holds two ice cube trays, no hot water in summer months, no heating controls in winter months, no phone line, no laundry room, and halls that reek of cooked cabbage and most anything looks luxurious by comparison !!

sfgirl, I can totally relate since I grew up in Tallinn as well. Looking back I wonder how we did it but back then it was normal and we didn't know any different. No car, no phone, no freezer, no washer (my hands always looked horrible from having to hand-wash all the clothes. White socks were only for special events back then :) And yes the not having any control over the temperature in our apartment. Usually they waited until it was super cold to turn on the heat and then they didn't just turn it on, they turned it tropical! So we went from totally freezing to having to actually keep our windows open to be able to breathe. Oh and we didn't own a vacuum cleaner but did have 2 small dogs, so you can only imagine- to clean the carpets you had to roll them up, carry them outside ( we lived on the fourth floor), through them over a special stand and use a small brush....Crazy times! I feel totally spoiled now...

@ sfgirl and sim- I adore Tallinn! How nice to see both of your comments (I'm a Soviet historian, with a particular interest in the "Pribaltika"). Walking through the meandering cobblestones of the Old Town, there is no quicker way to come to the realization that oftentimes less IS more- forgoing size in favor of efficiency, you can truly decide what is and is not 'necessary'.

Like many here, I'll echo the sentiments that having certain things are indeed nice enough to nearly warrant them as necessities. After spending time as a student in Guadalajara, Mexico, I recall being shocked at the strange laundry apparatus that looked more like a large bowl with an egg-beating contraption than a washer! With due time, I too learned how to operate the antiquated washer and diligently strung up my clothes in the moist environment of a covered patio to dry. I've hauled duffle bags of laundry up and down city blocks in heels (thanks to a retail job!) and I can attest that having a washer/dryer is a nice thing... one that buys me much more time. But what exactly I DO with that extra time is the key. If I use it to make more errands or spend more time in the car, then I might yearn for the days of reading a good book on top of the dryer at the laundromat.

I suppose the one *little* thing that became a requirement for me is not so little at all- a garage. My husband and I both adore the freedom that our motorcycles bring to us- smiles on our faces, more change in our pocketbooks and better fuel economy than most anything. But, beside that, we need a place to WORK on our babies. While they can be kept outside, the elements and 'predators' prove to kill off most motorbikes outside. What's more, the ability to wrench on our own bikes (ie maintain them) is as important to the sport as actually riding them (for safety and for entertainment... ok, it's my hubby's job but I bring good conversation into the fixing!). We ultimately chose to buy a townhome downtown rather than a flat condo because of the attached garage it brought us. Man, we are spoiled....

Everyone so far seems to have a good grasp on reality. I am working on my M. of Architecture, and often times I am sent out to do a housing analysis or talk to homeowners (often in the Kalorama $$ area) and some of the extravagance I see is beyond ridiculous. One home I visited had 3 Miele Dishwashers, 2 of which still had the user instructions wrapped in plastic inside the tub. Another had a power operated toilet w/ a remote control. Insane.

Internet is a must...can't live without that.

A washer and dryer in the apartment is an essential for me...can't do without that, either. Nothing beats being able to do laundry in your pajamas and bake/cook/read, whilst the laundry is going.

A dishwasher is a must...I use it sometimes to sterilize things that might not be clean enough for me after washing them in the sink. (large cutting boards, etc.)

MotoBonnie, I'm totally in love with Tallinn's Old Town. I bet you know more about our history than I do :)