apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

Get a system for mail:

try to handle each day's incoming mail immediately. Recycle, toss and file the new mail when it comes in the house. Be ruthless--are you really going to base the weeks' meals on the circular from Safeway? If this isn't already your habit, toss the circular.

Have lots of open storage (i.e. baskets) for kid clutter. Have them help you put away toys--make it a game, or play an upbeat, favorite song.

GL!

Good article. We've been doing a very small version of the Cure at home...focusing on one room a week and REALLY cleaning it, donating stuff we don't need, tossing stuff no one would want. I think it's so important to do one room at a time so that you can see success and that what you're doing is something that you can see.

Missuswayne,

This is not intended to be unkind .... it looks more like you have conflict over throwing things away than having organization challenges. I agree with all the advice given -- sounds like you need a 1 or 2 day vacation from being a mom, and *then* on the 3rd day, you could begin tackling one defined area.

Another tactic might be to ask two close friends to help. The first friend (or husband??) would take the kids out for an entire day. Second friend would help you be ruthless and focused as you fill donation bags and trash bags with all that forgotten and unused stuff.

Purging feels fantastic. You'd be amazed. :-)

I have my own clutter problem. It's called the dining table! No matter what I do I cannot get that sucker cleared off.

There are always stacks of envelopes - I mean I toss the (Comcast) ads (that I get every stinking day no matter who I call to make them stop) - I have a pile for shredding that goes to my boyfriend's house because he keeps threatening to get a shredder. I pay my bills on line and toss the mailings in their designated ,pretty basket - but it always seems like there are envelopes I hold on the table to 'get to' - whether it's an interest rate I should consider or the rewards rebate for my credit card. I went through the whole stack again last week and ended up tossing only half the pile. Grrr!

But I tell myself that I have better control than some others. Last night I caught an episode of Little People Big World - and could not believe the mess all over the counters and everywhere in their house!
I mean - my mom made me pick up my toys if the mailman came up to the door! How can people let camera crews in their house - with their house looking like that? My mom would die!

Judgemental rant endeth.

A lot of people swear by Flylady.net. When you sign up, you get daily emails reminding you to complete a small task. Really small--things like scrub your sink or put away your laundry. The idea is that baby steps will get you to a clean home, and it's much more manageable than tackling it all at once.

I am working through this myself. I exhausted and overwhelmed (6yr, 4yr and 1yr old at home). One thing that is helping me work through the clutter in my house is to find a place for everything. Once I have identified all of those places, I can start by cleaning out those places first. Then I can go around to the other rooms or locations and have places to put things as I clear the room out.

I also agree with the poster who mentioned FlyLady.net. It's not only daily e-mail reminders, it's a whole system that will help you manage your life. (Incidentally, the FlyLady system teaches that clutter can't be organized--you can only get rid of it.) Key concepts in the system include establishing morning and evening routines, taking baby-steps, tackling things just 15 minutes at a time, and letting go of perfectionism and guilt. Another important concept is to not let yourself get overwhelmed--don't try to clear everything out in one big swoop like you see on television. Those folks have 20 crew-members working on a show. Your home didn't get messy overnight, and it's not going to get clean and organized overnight either.

A couple of caveats about FlyLady: (1) It can be a lot of e-mails, so you might want to get the daily digest instead of the individual e-mails. (2) The system is geared towards stay-at-home moms, but don't get caught up in that. I work full-time (and then some) and have found it pretty easy to tailor the system to my needs. Pick and choose what works for you.

A few other things that I personally try to keep in mind when I'm in the process of de-cluttering. (1) Only keep the things you LOVE or NEED. If it's not useful and/or doesn't make you smile, get rid of it. (2) Handle something once, then make a decision about it. If you pick up the Band-Aids, move them to the bathroom medicine cabinet right away. Don't put them back into the pile with the mail. (3) I agree with the main article--You don't have to do everything all at once. Tackle one drawer. Or one shelf. Or one sofa. Do it for 5, 10, or 15 minutes at a time--and set a timer. And work QUICKLY--don't let yourself get distracted. (4) Don’t keep things out of guilt, like a gift you received that is not your taste or style. And don’t keep things out of fear or feelings of “what if.” You don’t need 3 blenders or 4 vacuum cleaners—trust yourself to be able to replace anything that will get broken or lost months or years down the road.

When I am doing something that I dislike, like filing, I often do it in short bursts during TV commercials. My television is in the same room as my TV (as I live in a studio apartment...), so I go over to the desk and do 3 minutes at a time. I can do a week's worth of filing during the commercials one TV show!

I mean my television is in the same room as my file boxes!

Something that always seems to help me tackle the clutter is to first:
pull out "the clutter" and throw obvious "junk" into either
1) trash
2) recycle
3) donate

and then whatever is left gets sorted into the rooms where it belongs. From there, clean each room and organize each room. Its easier to focus on individual rooms when you know there isn't any "junk" and everything belongs in that room.

: ) goodluck and hang in there! you're not alone

I think it helps to think about editing spaces each time you look at them even if you don't get around to doing it while you think about it. If you're searching a cabinet for something, it doesn't take but a moment to think about what is in it and what you really need to keep or really like. Once you consider it a few times, you'll be ready to toss some things next time you approach the space. It's a way of psyching yourself up for getting rid of things and changing your mindset through repeated applications of this type of thinking.

It gets easier to ditch things as time goes by if you do this. Eventually, it'll be very easy to toss things you don't like or need.

use ritalin.

Here's the deal: the clutter is totally kicking your butt, and it's generating negative feelings in you toward your living space. I can sympathize, because I'm fighting the same battle! You need to try to change your attitude about it, because that will not only help you DO something, it will also help you teach your kids how to deal with clutter.

Start small--a lot of people do 15 minutes, but you could even do 10. Get your older kiddo involved. Put on some fun crazy music, set the timer, and grab a laundry basket. Start in one room, filling the basket with things that don't belong in that room. If you have time, make deliveries, putting things where they go. If you happen to spend the whole 10 minutes filling your basket, then just wait an hour or so, set your timer again, and spend the second session putting things away. The key is to not get sidetracked--if you just need to put away a pair of slippers, don't start organizing the sock drawer.

You can start a version of this for your oldest kiddo. Give 'em a basket, set the timer, and let them run around all crazy picking up their toys and putting them in the basket. Make it fun, and keep it simple. Don't start them with the "clean your room" syndrome, which is probably what you have. I remember being sent to my room to clean it and sitting there wondering where in the heck to start. My mom has the cleaning gene. I do not. Sounds like you're missing it, too, so MAKE a place to start. If that starting place is 5 minutes to put as many stray items in a basket as possible, then do it! It's SO much easier to do the harder stuff when you feel like you've already accomplished something.

Also, be creative about your own solutions. Decide what can be a mess within certain confines, like the toy chest. If the crayons are a constant mess, then confine that mess to one box and don't fret. If you hate sorting laundry, sort clothes when you take them off, and train the rest of the family to do this, too. That's another key--everyone has to help. Make it as easy as possible, and try to make it fun too, so it seems less like another chore. Remember, you're not the only person creating the mess, so trying to clean it all yourself probably won't work. Your family probably needs some new habits. Start with baby steps and encouragement, and I think everyone will soon be happier.

Good luck!

I recommend reading three books

It's All Too Much: An Easy Plan for Living a Richer Life with Less Stuff by Peter Walsh (the guy from Clean Sweep)

Organizing from the Inside Out by Julie Morgenstern

Maxwell's Apartment Therapy.

I know, you don't have time to read a magazine let alone three books. Check them out from the library and just skim them or get the CDs from the library or audible.com. The three books are very complementary and will give you the skills & tools you need.

Try to keep inspired by pictures in magazines or on the web and picture a home like Benita Larsson's and how cool it would be if your place looked like hers. I know that might not be realistic, but it's something I keep in mind while I'm purging. A beautiful, clutter-free home is a great reward for getting rid of crap I never even use.

Edit, edit, edit. Do it once with the easy stuff and then come back a few days later and do it again. Use Maxwell's outbox method but don't let the outbox stay around too long - get the stuff out of your house or put it back where it came from.

This post is great: http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/la/organizing/top-10-organizing-tips-from-chez-larsson-050026

Finally, (I know, super long preachy post) if you want to take it to the next level, read David Allen's Getting Things Done. The time you spend now working on these skills will help you for the rest of your life.

Good luck!

I've set aside time every Sunday that I devote to getting rid of stuff. I do this acknowledging it as a part of my life, rather than rushing to get it "done." Don't we all know by now that even if you got a section uncluttered and "done," more always finds it's way into the house, right? I'm coming to grips with that and that's gone a long way on my perspective of organizing and decluttering. It'll probably be a lifelong process for me and I'm okay with that... as long as my weekly time is eventually spent as upkeep and not catchup. Upkeep means I'm content with the amount of clutter and am just seeking to maintain. Catchup is what I'm in the process of, where I'm getting my home back from clutter's grips. Good luck to all in a similar situation :)

I agree with both of the above mentioned books, but what's the deal with Oprah she just like completely forgot about Julie Morgenstern when she discovered Peter Walsh. I like them both, but poor Julie, lol.

Someone said something about using a ruthless friend. That idea is tried and true for me especially since I can also be tolerant of my own clutter.