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as a single woman on my own - both. Safety is key but i can't bear to live in an ugly place.

This is a very interesting question, one my husband and I talk about a lot. For instance, I absolutely love Carthay Square - the houses and streets are so beautiful. BUT - there are hardly any amenities within easy walking distance, which is a big turn-off for both of us, and really a deal-breaker for my husband, who works from home. Still, if someone gave me a house there, I'd be there in a heartbeat!

I did the former, sacrificing neighborhood for a decent price to live with a boyfriend and I don't recommend it. The relationship became very insular...

I highly suggest hunting HARD for a space you don't hate in the neighborhood you love. You can set up an RSS feed for Craigslist with certain search terms (e.g. area, street, qualities such as stainless appliances or wood floors, etc). Keep an eye on those like a vulture, but also put in some shoe leather just walking around the neighborhood you like for FOR RENT signs that may slip under the e-radar.

It's important for me to feel alive in my neighborhood. Culture (good food, good coffee, good people) and safety. I feel fortunate to have a nice pad in a nice hood.

i spent 2 years in a dark basement apartment within walking distance of my office and that allowed me to save up to buy my little house last year.

I love my neighborhood AND apartment. But, after 2 years in the same place, my secret wish is to have a dog. My landlord won't do it so I've only been half-heartedly looking because I don't hold much hope for finding all that I want. I saw a GREAT townhouse--cheap rent and pet-friendly place--BUT it was pretty much in the ghetto--edgy, if you like. Though I loved the space, the light, the amenities and pet-friendliness, I think it would be soul-crushing I think to wake up in that neighborhood. So--for me--neighborhood is key.

As much as I love visiting my friends with more affordable and larger living spaces, I absolutely detest the fact that they live in far remote corners of the city where there is nothing interesting around them and they become isolated in their units. So I would choose the neighborhood over space. However, this is about co-habitation. Personally, I would move with my partner to a new (and neutral) unit that would be a compromise of location, space, amenities and $$. I recently did this (Angelino Heights - still Echo Park but also near Downtown!) and we are all the more happier for it.

Unless you are a very private, stay-at-home type of person, neighborhood really matters. I had to make the same choice recently and I am very happy I chose neighborhood. It's nice to be able to walk down the street for dinner etc., and I feel like I can spruce our place up with elbow grease-- whereas there's nothing I could do to fix a crappy neighborhood!

location, location, location!

I recently moved out of state and didn't know much about my new city. I wish I could be in a neighborhood again. I currently live in a great apartment that is almost a house, but is in the middle of suburbia. Nothing but complexes and cul-de-sacs for miles. I'd squish back into my old 1 bedroom in a heartbeat. The neighborhood made up for the lack of closet space.

Sit down and make lists of what you actually do daily, weekly, monthly. Not your dream life, not your friend's lives, not TV lives.

Emily's comment about her husband working from home is one way to help decide. For instance, realizing that every day is "take your spouse to work" day when a person works from home. There has to be a set up for a good work space that doesn't make you feel like you're living in an office.

Questions to consider:

How often do you eat out and where?
How often do you visit stores and where?
How many vehicles do you have (if any) and where is parking available?
How is public transit?
How is safety?

Everything costs money, not just the apartment. Living farther out might mean a big apartment, but you have to drive everywhere. Living in close quarters may have parking problems, especially if you entertain often.

Parking tickets are costly. Parking garages are costly. Gas is costly.

If it's a question of him moving in with you or you moving in with him, I'd like to suggest that you find a new place for the two of you. New for BOTH of you.

You'll discover more about each others needs that way.

Sometime there will be an argument and the power play will be used of "it's MY apartment".

I noticed you said "MY favorite part of town", not OUR...

Don't forget the Wagon Wheel Coffee Table phenomenon either. ;)

Thanks everyone for sharing your experiences/tips! I really want the nice neighborhood while the beau really wants the big apartment (and he's willing to look for an apartment in my preferred neighborhood). But it is important for the space to be somewhat large because we both work from home and together, we'll be housing 3 cats and a dog... So you can see how the problem would be solved by me moving in with him (but I'm really swaying towards looking long and hard for the perfect place).

Neighborhood, definitely. While space is nice, it will get claustrophobic pretty fast if there's nothing to do and nowhere to go without getting in your car.

I'd say hunt very hard in neighborhoods that appeal to you. It is much easier to fix up even a rental apartment to something more your taste than to transform a neighborhood into a place you'd like to be.

i second bernat... when my boyfriend and i moved in together, we went for space not neighborhood - and a year later, we moved again. the house was lovely and spacious and everything we could want, but we couldn't WALK anywhere, it was incredibly hot in the summer, and we just hated life living there!

the boy works from home - it's possible to find decent space in nice neighborhoods that allow for it. you might just have to sacrifice the marble countertops!

How is Echo Park a compromise? It's right in the center of everything and has great amenities. This makes me think that what constitutes a decent neighborhood is quite subjective and might depend on what we're used to or where we lived before etc.

* Or Angelino Heights, which is just a mini-neighborhood within Echo Park

My boyfriend is being relocated, so we're making a swift move to Berkeley, CA. If you're moving within the same city, it's easy to search long and hard to find the perfect combination of location and aesthetics... when you're moving 900 miles, you're lucky if you can find one of those things!

We actually had three options:
- The tiny brick cottage with fireplace, vintage charm, and a redwood growing right out of it... for a tremendously high rent in a mediocre neighborhood.
- An enormous 2 bedroom flat with a living room, sitting room, dining room, remodeled kitchen, laundry room, mudroom, deck, spiral staircase... for an outrageously low rent in a seriously frightening neighborhood far away from work & play.
- A totally unremarkable 2 bedroom apartment in an ugly building... for reasonable rent, and just a couple blocks away from Chez Panisse, Peet's Coffee, the market, etc.

Those other apartments will haunt us forever, but we had to consider that the "at home" feeling should last even after you walk out of your front door!

Really it depends how much time you spend at home. Are you a homebody, or do you like to go out?

Aesthetic of the apartment still counts high on the list but I will always sacrifice square footage and price for the right location.

I'm a firm believer that you can have both... if you've got the time to look. Neighborhood, walk-ability and public transport options far outweigh the details of the living space for me. On average, I'm in my car only once a week, and I love that freedom! Fortunately, I had time to look and found the ideal, reasonable priced place in my favorite neighborhood. Good luck!! :)

neighborhood!

Agree, ideally you get a great mixture of both, but nothing beats living in your favorite neighborhood! I learned this the hard way after living in a series of fabulous apartments (the Brooklyn Heights brownstone, the Marina del Rey beach apt, the Spanish duplex in Carthay Circle, and I could go on) in neighborhoods where I never hung out and no one would come to visit! Not to mention the amount of money I racked up in cab rides home after late nights. Now I'm so happy in Silver Lake - my apartment is fairly non-descript but I live near some of my favorite restaurants and cafes and I can walk down the hill to the reservoir and dog park!

Seriously, what's the point of living in a big city like LA if you can't easily take advantage of its amenities? Otherwise, you might as well move somewhere smaller where you can really have everything...everything but the city lifestyle, that is.

When I was just out of college my partner and I chose space and affordability over neighborhood. We had a mix of neighbors age- and culture-wise and a charming place that was great for entertaining. On the upside, we were the first of our friends to be able to afford a condo (in the same slightly dodgy area). On the downside, we didn't have any interesting shops and restaurants or easy access to downtown, and I was often worried about my safety when I was alone. Looking back, I wish we had at least tried a year of living in the trendier, safer neighborhoods our friends did. I'd probably encourage my kids to do that.

In my city (Vancouver, Canada), I find there's not a huge price difference for renting in different areas. So no, it's not worth it.

I lived for a year in an area that was quiet, but driving distance from any restaurants or grocery stores. I had also just started working from home, and I felt painfully isolated.

I'm going with neighborhood, too - you can do a lot to a nondescript apartment in a better neighborhood, you can rent a storage space for your extra stuff if you need to, etc., etc., but if the neighborhood doesn't work for you, all you can do is wait it out and hope for the best.

I lucked out and fell into a wonderful neighborhood. I talk to and hang out with my neighbors and I love it.

I also found a job in my field (art) I can walk to! Yeah Pasadena!

Location, location, location.

My mother always says, "You can change the house, but you can't change the neighborhood." The times I have sacrificed a quality neighborhood for what I thought was THE perfect apartment, I have eventually come to regret. You don't realize how much the things outside the four walls of your home end up mattering -- until you don't have them. There are a lot of things you can do, quick fixes, that will improve your quality of life in a lackluster apartment. But there's not a lot you can do about the fact that it's a twenty-minute drive to the nearest grocery store.

And out of all the apartments I've lived in, do you know which one I look back on and regret leaving? The shoebox in the awesome neighborhood.

I am a single mother of one so location is very important to me. On the same token, space is also a needed element given that my toddler's collection of toys alone is enough for those tiny, claustrophobic apartments. So I aim for the largest I can possibly get in a good neighborhood.

I really miss being in a city neighborhood, with the bodegas and small businesses. I chose my neighborhood for the condo and the access to bike/walk trails--very active neighborhood and pretty. The chain restaurants and lack of walkable smaller grocery store/coop and local coffee shops bum me out though. I don't want to hang out here. The good thing is that I'm just on the edge of the city, like one giant step into the suburbs.

i love a beautiful space but when push comes to shove, i'd have to go with a great neighborhood over a great space. safety, accessibility, community, location are so important to lifestyle. sometimes, if you don't have a choice (we had to live in a god awful town for over 8 years), a great space can make it tolerable. but, in the end, if you have a great space and it's in a bad location, then it ain't a great space!

If you're moving in together for the first time - why not make things as simple as possible? Move into boyfriend's larger place with your menagerie. Agree if you don't like it after a specific period (or when lease ends), you'll find a shared space in the area YOU want.

Relationships require compromise.

I have to say, both, and agree with Bernat's take on it. I like my current apartment very much, but it isn't anywhere near what I'd call "my best" or my dream home. What does make it great is that I'm in a nice older neighborhood and within walking distance of both my friends and all the amenities that downtown Colorado Springs offers, which is incredibly important to me. It is also nowhere near to the pre-fabbed cookie cutter homes that've become de rigueur in parts of town, which would drive me nuts to have to look at all the time. I get the best of both ends of the spectrum.

Everyone has their own comfort level with regard to potential homes. I've lived in some pretty crappy places so my standards are kind of low. The ONE thing that would give me pause is if the apartment were really dark and had few windows.

But I'd never turn down an apartment just because it was boring or ugly, but it was in an awesome neighborhood. You can fix a place up (as long as it's in decent shape), but you can't change your neighborhood. Since I'm single and don't have a car, I'd never live in a part of town where safety or lack of public transport/walkability was an issue, or where the buildings around me are crumbling.

Oh yeah, and what's the point of sacrificing an interesting, vital neighborhood to a fancy apartment? If you're so uninterested in living in the city that you'd rather sit in your place than go out, then you should move out to the suburbs where it's more about the houses than what surrounds them.

Yeah, I need the yard space for my 3 dogs... so i would have to go with neighborhood!

A great neighborhood becomes an extension of your apartment. On the other hand, not matter how great an apartment is, it will quickly become a prison cell if it is in the wrong location.

Neighborhood. Walking out of your apartment into a bad vibe can be soul-crushing.

My very first apartment after college was in a sketchy area five-minutes' drive from my work, which happened to be near a very convenient shopping area. My location was amazing but the apartment was crap. It had potential; a tiny studio converted from a hotel built in 1911, the original murphy bed frame (and what felt like the original mattress), and easygoing landlords who didn't mind a little paint here and there. However, it was dingy, had terribly carpet, no showerhead, concrete walls, burnt wood from when the last tenant accidentally set the place on fire, and very little natural light. And creepy neighbors. I lived there for six months until I moved to Japan. I would repeat the experience for the sake of convenience, but would have worked harder to fix up my living space.

I wouldn't want to live in the gorgeous apartment with all the amenities if I felt that I had to look over my shoulder and not feel safe enough to walk outside with everything locked up. That's no way to live for me. Safety is number one.

...and have everything locked up. That's better. ;) :D

Does "giving up a great neighborhood" mean you'll be moving into a bad/undesirable neighborhood, or just that you'll miss your old one?

I am also moving to LA from OC. I got a great job on Beverly and Robertson, one of the most affluent street corners in LA. In OC, there is nothing older than 20 years old, in LA there are places from the turn of the century. I am personally looking for style! hardwood floors, dome archways, iron work, tile, and temperature. The neighborhood is somewhat important, but you spend most time inside your house, not outside. Just focus on things that matter like a bathtub, dishwasher, dining room etc...

Neighbourhood.

Go for the awesome neighborhood. (At least while I am 'young and hip').
I am currently the person in my group of friends who has the cheap, tiny, run-down apartment without many windows in the 'cool' part of town.
And my friends still think it is 'awesome' and 'adorable'.
I can switch up furnishings, paint, and decor. I can't ever feel safe walking the dog late at night in certain parts of town.

A close buddy of mines is in the same circumstance. He really wants a nice condo in a great part of the city, but the ONLY nice condo he seems to like is the one he is in. The location is almost perfect. However, he will have to settle for a one bedroom one bath.

Its a fairly great city, just nothing he wants in his current price range. I said, "If you like the location, do it!"

Location makes you happy. You can paint over ugly walls

Neighborhood. I listened to my husband and chose size over neighborhood and I would sell my only child to get out of here. I would sacrafice several rooms to get closer to the beach and restaurants we enjoy!

For me, it's a nice combination of both. I am willing to venture slightly outside my ideal neighborhood for a nice apartment. You do have to live there for usually at least a year - so you are going to want something you don't detest. I admit to being a little bit of a hermit but you need a place that will comfort you when you are home.

You two need to go exploring - find a neighborhood you both really like and then find a place there. You won't be happy if you move to his place and he won't be happy if he moves to yours - the same goes for power struggles. Find a place that is both of yours. Search deeply - not everything that is up for rent you find in a rental book -- there are sometimes hidden gems.

There seriously is only so much you can do to a rental unit - so even if it is in the best neighborhood, if it's ugly and rundown, dump it and maybe just outside the ideal neighborhood. There is a lot of great neighborhoods - look outside your box.

Depends on how bad the neighborhood is. Having a beautiful place is irrelevant if a) you're constantly worrying about your safety and b) your friends and family refuse to visit you.

Also, if you have a dog and no yard, you'll want a neighborhood where you don't feel in great danger for that last walk at night, or if there is a middle-of-the-night emergency.

Everyone seems to be jumping to the conclusion that the 'less than ideal' neighborhood is a crime infested ghetto. There is something in between!

I am of the opinion if you want to go somewhere, you can still go even if it's not on your block. If your home is too small there is very little you can do about that.

@ Lisa of Montreal--I would terribly miss my old neighborhood and the neighborhood that I'd be moving into has nothing to walk to... no coffee shops, friend's houses, etc. (not to mention no street parking--ever)

I'm a big fan of not being rent poor. Therefore, I found a cheap NYC neighborhood (Washington Heights) and found a small, but thankfully light filled apartment in the best section of that neighborhood (Hudson Heights). It's lovely, walkable, and has a huge park. I got the best of both worlds. I have friends in Jersey that I refuse to visit, but other than that, I never feel out of touch or off-limits. I love it! And I'm actually finding that in a smaller apartment, I'm much more willing to paint the rooms because it doesn't seem like such a task. In my larger apartment (in the ghetto, so glad i moved!) i would only allow myself to do accent walls because i didn't want to have to repaint the whole huge room when I moved.


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This definitely depends on the city. We have a great house (for our likes) in a nice neighborhood in Austin, TX but you can't really walk anywhere (coffee shops, bars, etc). However if I were living in Chicago I would have to live somewhere where you walk anywhere - it's just the feel of the city I think. It really depends on the person too. Our house is only 6 miles from downtown but it feels very out of the way, which to me is a nice thing :)

I'm sacrificing money and space, but every time I can park my car right across the street, stroll quickly to the subway, walk around the corner to the liquor store or down the street for food and shopping, i know I made the right decision.

I'm with the majority of responders, Beth. I say go for neighborhood. I entertain alot and love to be in my house, and I'm lucky that i'm also only two blocks from sunset blvd and all the silverlake spots including deli, liquor store, coffee shop, etc. The thing about working at home is that you need to get out even more than if you work somewhere else -- so it's best to be in a place that allows you to move about when you're getting stir crazy, up against the computer screen too long etc. I say smaller place, neighborhood that allows you to feel connected to the outside world. There's nothing better than being able to go out for a drink with your lover and walk home!

I got lucky when I got my current space, it ended up being the first place I checked out and when I came in to see it the first time, one evening in late Nov - and that's almost 6 years ago now and fell in love with it and it had what I wanted, a balcony, a view, nice light, and was a 1 bedroom and really nice space and a decently laid out kitchen.

The neighborhood was where I wanted to live as it meant I'd be within walking distance to the grocery store, restaurants and downtown. True, most of that meant hoofing it uphill to grocery shop etc but in that time, I've seen the area change, grow and watch the downtown skyline gain even more skyscrapers.

It turned out the apartment is 600Sq Ft and I love it, true I have to park on the street but being on the hill's edge, I can often find a place to park my truck so it's all good. :-)

and I should say, the area is Seattle's Capitol Hill and I've been known to walk from way over near the CD, at Cap Hill's southern edge where a gay bar is and walk all the way home through Cal Anderson Park and feel safe doing so.

I also have walked much of the neighborhood and never felt any issues with doing so and it's a mixed income, family, sinigle, gay/straight area and is in places a bit funky but also vibrant too.

I would first say go for a new, neutral location. I just moved in with my partner and we decided to start in *our* place so there was no residual territoriality. Also, since we both had month-to-month leases, we had some time to find something great that worked for cost, neighborhood, and apartment. I'd suggest looking slightly outside the standard cool-zones to make it happen, though. We ended up discovering the Picfair neighborhood and fell in love. We have dozens of restaurants, design shops, cheap-yet-great theater, boutiques, bars and galleries all in walking distance. (It's definitely approaching gentrification, but not nearly "discovered" or hip. Yet.)

And I love our triplex. Lovelovelove. It feels like home. So it is possible to find, and I'd definitely look for a balance of all three in a new apartment. Good luck!

Honestly, it's a bit of both...trying to find the right balance while making some concessions as long as they are worth it. I would never live in a hole and I hate basement suites but I think of it this way: I would rather have a small, "okay" apartment in, say, Paris then a perfect, large, townhouse in some boring suburban area (outskirts of Calgary, for example) or in a dodgy area (Edmonton) or an area with no culture or nightlife and crappy people (Victoria, where I live now, unfortunately).

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To some of you, I don't get it. Seems like most here would live in a shack to live in their ideal neighborhood. I couldn't live in a crappy apartment no matter how good the neighborhood is. There is a good balance of both.

As allisonharris said, you can still go somewhere even if it's a block or two away. More than likely, if you don't mind the exercise that society tells us we need to do more of, you probably should take the place a few more blocks away and walk it.