apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

i just moved into my boyfirned's home and after 10 years, he hadn't done anything to it. it looked like a college dude house with hand me down, mismatched furniture and stained carpet. i have been slowly fixing his place up in baby steps so as not to freak him out and it's been going pretty well since we just painted and installed hard wood floors. i always ask him what he thinks and he always tells me, "i don't care". i think it's because i'm not flowery feminine and he likes how it's turning out. he does get his 'man space' though where i told him he could do anything he wants. it's in the basement.

The only things we really disagree on are my husband's toys and sports paraphrenalia. He's a professional athlete and so we have this huge photograph of him competing in our living room that, while I'm proud of his accomplishments, is a bit much for my tastes. Eventually, I'd like us to have a big enough place someday for him to get his own private room to keep all his stuff.

This poll is a bit hetero-centric, no? Many people here wouldn't be able to answer accurately tho they may have the same issues. (Not me! I don't have to share the decisions - or the bills - with anyone.)

Uh yeah. Aren't you forgetting that there are a lot of same-sex couples on apartment therapy?!

That's the very best part about living by oneself: not having to look at other people's stuff. As Thoreau says, "Any man more right than his neighbors constitutes a majority of one" and that applies double to decor. It doesn't even matter what the offending piece is. If I didn't choose it, I don't wanna see it. I love my friends, but I choose them on the basis of character & personality, not taste, and it's a good thing. Hell is other people's stuff.

Magnaverde.

I remember that wagon wheel in Harry Met Sally. After it was made into a coffee table, I couldn't tell what the problem was. But it was the 80's and I guess kitsch wasn't cool then.

I love that comment so much - something like "that ugly, garage sale Roy Rogers Wagon Wheel!" It cracks me up almost as much as Pictionary:

"BABY FISH MOUTH! BABY FISH MOUTH!"
"Baby Talk!"
"Baby talk? Who's heard of that?"
"Oh, and 'Baby Fish Mouth' is sweeping the nation?"

I moved in with my boyfriend recently (I'm in Toronto though.. YMMV :-) ). Redid the hall (orange!), bedroom and made a bar - and he loved it all. So far so good - he's skeptical about spending money, but open to new solutions.

He even is okay with me wanting the bathroom pink ;)

I think in any relationship communication is key for design (and for other things as well). It is possible to find a great medium between two tastes, no matter how extreme they are. Just look at this example of a wonderful combination of two opposites.

Warning to people who are currently happy with doing all the design work while their partners sit back and applaud -- be careful not to let him off the hook for basic household upkeep, unless you have paid cleaning help.

The first thing I'm buying with a post-MBA-school pay check is a weekly visit from a paid cleaning service.

my boyfriend and i will be moving in together this summer. we're moving into a fresh, new, empty condo together. so we're starting from scratch. however, i'm already sensing some problems. since we're both students (he's doing his bachelor's and i'm in law school) our budget is pretty tight. however, he doesn't care about the way furniture looks so he's been accepting all these handme downs (that don't go together in any fashion or sense). i'm frustrated over his design ideas, or lack of. i throw in my two-bits but he just complains that things are too expensive. i'm will be doing some serious flea market, estate sale, warehouse sale shopping this summer to offset his fashion sense.

I asked my husband this question the other day. While it appears to be a joint process, his basic end point is that a) he likes a nice space and b) he trusts my taste. The fact that I do ask him about stuff is important, but essentially, it's my domain, just like the yard is his domain. He'll ask me about this or that plant, and he'll run the ideas by me, but he's the gardener.

Mei -- Been there, done that, had the tantrum. If you ever find yourself in Phoenix, the mojitos are on me. Seriously. We'll go to super-cheap vintage furniture stores and load up your car with goodies, too.

Well, as I mentioned in the previous thread above, I have the good (?!) luck to be with a guy who cares very, very much about design, has a superb aesthetic sense, .... and has Magnaverde's attitude about other people's stuff in his place. Well, he wouldn't say it to my face, and he thinks I have a great eye and good taste and all that (seriously, I sometimes suspect he wouldn't be with me if he didn't find my home beautiful and uplifting) - but he couldn't stand to have a thing of his moved. So we both enjoy and admire each other's aesthetic sensibilities. But we can't live together. Truly, this is the biggest issue, and it sometimes blows my mind how important the home is to each of us.

Oh, and yes, of course he cooks and cleans - so I don't have any extra work to do at all. But I don't get to renovate! And his kitchen has needed to be redone for years.... As much as the objects in his home are gorgeous and well thought out, he is what Maxwell calls a 'cool' type, and I am 'warm'. So though our aesthetic sensibilities are similar, our attitudes toward fixing the home are entirely opposite.

My boyfriend and I moved in together a bit over 6 months ago. Thankfully his overstuffed sofa which had seen one too many years of bachelor living wouldn't fit up our townhouse stairs. Our ideas of what we like aren't exactly in line, although he's pretty laid back as long as it isn't too girly. I've learned to live with a large plasma television and have developed ways to incorporate or hide all stuff that comes with it (the 7 speakers, the receiver, etc) and in return I get my bright pink pillow, and candles. I've made most of the decisions as far as the furniture, fabrics, etc that we have, but we both enjoy the space, and he does have his own room that is all his own.