Final Weekend!

Watercooler for those who are decluttering this month. Name your project, speak, ask & listen...
(4 Comments Yesterday)


NEW SPACE with floors about to be done by Vincent Devaney


OLD SPACE
Comments (25)
I continue to slowly-but-surely rid myself of excess via eBay, with varied result.
I simply can't get it done this weekend. I'll be away from home at a weekend music fest and there's no way I can finish. But I'll just plug away by myself. sob.
P2, I know from your previous contest entry that you had undergone a major decluttering. Have you generally been able to stay uncluttered?
Pixie--
Hey, thanks for asking! YES! Still decluttered, thank you!
Two ongoing challenges are incoming mail (we approach the height of catalog and credit-card-offer season!) and staying on top of laundry-folding (a stack of t-shirts taunts me even as we speak...).
But it is all easily whipped in shape, an exceptional perk of the original massive decluttering.
I am actually now thinning out my storage space. The act of letting go has been easier for this emotionally-charged packrat by selling rather than donating (although donating was key in phase 1, and still where my used clothing goes... yay, Housing Works!)
This season is especially hard for me, though, since I love all things Fall, retail-wise. But I've actually managed to keep the outflow ahead of the inflow!
It CAN be done. TRUST me!
That's great to hear - a reformed clutterer! Congratulations, that's a huge accomplishment!
One of my major efforts over the last year or two has been a Campaign Against Paper: switching to online accounts, getting off most catalog lists, not getting 2 daily newspapers delivered (I read online, at the gym or cafe, or buy on some days), refusing pamphlets handed out on the street and the like, and getting rid of well over half my paper files - all kinds of stuff, like recipes I was accumulating, but never making. I need to send a request to the place that gets you off junkmail lists too. And get a scanner.
With a bit of a hangover, today is the day of our big move. Our old office doesn't look too good yet, but everything is being packed into boxes for the mover this afternoon.
The new space is smaller but really nice. I had the floors done by Vincent Devany last night (pic above) and the landlord is painting China White this morning.
Good luck with the move, maxwell! I don't envy you in the least. We've moved our non-profit agency - complete with a resource library - twice since I've been working there, and I keep telling the board that if they move us again, THEY'RE doing the packing while *I* take my vacation time! :)
P2, yay, for former packrat clutterbugs! Me too! I'm really tough about getting rid of stuff now, too. One of my rules is: "If in doubt, throw it out!"
I'm a bit of a scavenger (as you know if you've seen the pics I linked to in the Renewal Thread), and although I haven't been "curbside shopping" since I first left home (many, many centuries ago), I like to leave my old stuff beside the dumpster for the current curbside shoppers. Somebody ALWAYS takes it. One time, a man took two end tables right out of my hands before I even got them on the ground. "Are you throwing those away?" he said. "My son just moved out and he doesn't have anything!"
But in my community, which is fairly small, I have issues with the few organizations that collect donated goods and resell them. Except for Big Brothers and Sisters (who only take clothing), the rest are all right-leaning religious organizations that either have anti-gay hiring policies, or have rules like, oh, you can't stay at their shelters unless you are a christian. Grrr.
Good things to investigate when you are donating though. Non-profits often earn a good chunk of their operating money from donated goods.
HELP! I'm in need of some serious apartment therapy. After years of living with other people -- boyfriends, sister, cousin, former "best friends", classmates, coworkers -- I am finally able to afford to live by myself. Two years ago I moved into an approximately 350sq ft L-shaped studio apartment. Two years later, suffering from design/decorating paralysis, I am still living amidst unpacked boxes, tons of full shopping bags, overflowing laundry, empty kitchen cupboards, unpainted walls, no furniture, etc... And it is making me CRAZY. My bedside, the floor, and old bookshelves are piled high with design magazines, books on interior decorating, fabric samples, catalogs, graph paper, furniture templates, and the like. The image in my mind of where I LIVE --my home, my ideal, most representative, reflective, hip, cozy, smart, cool, rich-hippie, rock and roll pad looks NOTHING like my reality. Chaos, clutter, and piles and piles of stuff(crap) surround me everywhere I live and look and breathe and eat and sleep.
My creativity, my career, my love life, my social life, my state of mind... are all casualties.
I would LOVE to empty my entire apartment of its contents and start from scratch. Sort through everything, keep only what I love, shop shop shop every weekend at flea markets and second hand stores and craigs list and modern urban reatail. I live in apartment building in NYC. I can't empty my apartment onto the front lawn because there isn't one. No room in the hallway, no temporarily vacant apartments down the hall, no blank canvas to work from.
Please help. What is my problem? What can I do? Seems like the logical cliched answer would be to, "Just do it!", or some shit like that. But I don't work that way. I need to understand the psychological reasons why I won't budge. Is it fear? Of change, of failure? Of cultivating roots and being unexpectedly uprooted? Or finally happy? WHAT IS IT? I've got to make sense of the "illogical", before I can let it go and evoke/embrace change.
Any ideas, advice, solutions???...
Thanks. Peace and love... MJ
Hi Mary jo! I'm not a therapist, nor do I play one on TV, but here are a couple guesses about what's going on with your apartment:
1. You live in a space sized for someone who owns two pairs of perfect shoes, four perfect dinner plates, and cleaning equipment that looks like art when hung on the wall ('cause there's no closet space for it).
2. You've already started shopping/scavenging for your dream design, with the result that you have a LOT of stuff.
3. People gave you things to start your first apartment with. These things are not necessarily "you," but they're hard to get rid of because people GAVE them to you.
4. You want it to be PERFECT, and that's a long way off.
5. Every possible task looks like a big job -- and, in fact, when you start a task, you get sidetracked into four more tasks, and the next thing you know, you're sitting amidst complete chaos re-reading an entire back run of NEST or something.
If this sounds like you, take a look at http://www.flylady.net . This gal is a bit of a demagogue, but... she's also basically right about a lot of decluttering and housework issues, including Mt. Laundry. Some of her material doesn't apply to city living, but the "you don't have to be perfect," "you can do anything for 15 minutes," and "you can't organize clutter" bits ring true.
Mary jo--
You might consider hiring our gracious e-host Maxwell for a Therapeutic consultation. It's well worth the time and money.
Other than that, here are some rules I lived by digging myself out (you can see the befores and afters by looking at entry #13 in the Smallest Coolest apartment contest)...
One of the hardest parts is what you describe: No way to "clear a starting point", but that situation will improve as you delve in .
The biggest thing is, before you start, preferably from somewhere outside the apartment, visualize a very concrete, very easy-to-achieve step, such as "I will put all my Summer clothes in one place." Then, go home and don't do ANYTHING but that first step. Very often, when I did this, the next step would automatically suggest itself. I would actually work up a plan, mentally, all week, to arrive at a step that seemed "do-able" on Saturday. WOrked every time.
Consider short-term storage to clear some space.
Acknowledge that many, many steps will make it worse before it makes it better. Say it outloud when the disarray of clearing seems worse than when you started.
As mentioned, set a fixed amount of time EVERY DAY to tackle. It does not need to be hours, but to make a serious dent, it may need to be at least an hour, and some part of your other daily routine may take a hit (for me, it was gym-time...)
Put like things with like. That may sound stupidly simple, but you'd be amazed how it let's you see into what your problem areas might be, or what you'll eventually need to house them.
WAIT to buy storage solutions until 80% or better of your decluttering is behind you.
Get a shredder.
Ask for help, ask for company. Some of my biggest inroads were made when my partner was sitting quietly with his computer-- nervous to move lest he derail me! Something about feeling the need to stick with it when I had a witness really kept me going on days when I'd rather be at Short Hills Mall.
Turn off the TV, turn on the music.
Digitize your music.
Keep only the pages of magazines you want. Create a system to determine how many magazines you can keep. For me, I keep a year, and when the new November issue comes in, before I let myself read it, I return to last year's November issue, and raid it for pages. (Truth be told, this plan was kickstarted by the aforementioned partner, who offered me $1 for every magzine I got rid of... I took him up on the offer, and the result was enough money to buy a Ralph Lauren Modern Hurricane lantern...)
Organizations like Housing Works are your best ally.
When dealing with "gift guilt", ask what's best for the gift: to sit unused, unappreciated, or to find a home where it is used and loved. That honors the act of the gift more than hanging on to it but sticking it in dark recess. If that doesn't work, sell the items and donate your profits to a favorite charity, or use the money to buy art. Every time you look at the art piece you end up with, you'll have the satisfaction of having supported an artist (always a good cause) and that the love of MANY friends and relatives made that acquisition possible.
Hope some of this helps. Good luck.
Mary Jo,
There is a really great book that really explains all of the psychology behind clutter and why it is so hard to get started on removing it. It is called "It's Hard to Make a Difference When You Can't Find Your Keys" by Marilyn Paul, Ph. D.
I hope this helps you.
Randi
wende and P2, thank you
I'd never stomach the flylady whole, but you both provided very helpful bits of advice in a form I could take in. It just takes some reminders sometimes...
P2, VERY interesting thought about storage containment AFTER clutter removal -- I've always approached my apartments as storage problems needing to be solved, but perhaps there's another way to think about that...
Flylady was overkill for me too... but I did like the idea of setting a timer and doing 15 minutes at a time. THAT'S much more palatable than "oh my God it will take me years." Also, as someone who never knows where to begin, I use the work-around-the-room-clockwise suggestion to great success.
15 minutes, work around the room clockwise. It's worked great for me, and I'm a major slob with lots of stuff.
I, too, rip pages out of magazines now.
P2, where do you store the mag pages you tear out? I'm a bit dumbfounded on that one, so right now they're just stacked. I have toyed with the idea of putting them on matboards, but many of them are ads and it feels a bit silly.
My dilemma: I'm moving from NYC to Chicago this month. Because I'm breaking a lease, it might be soon or at the end of the month, so I'm a bit paralyzed. Any suggestions on how to handle packers and movers? I've only ever moved myself, so I'm not sure what to expect. (MGR, not sure if this is "renewal," so please forgive.)
Hey Mary Jo - It sounds to me like you are totally overwhelmed by the big picture and it's creating a barrier to beginning. I felt this way about my clutter two years ago. I was in a serious disaster, and I couldn't see how I could overcome it.
The key - and this is something I got from FlyLady - is to start breaking it down into smaller tasks. It sounds counter-intuitive to say this, but you really do have to STOP seeing the big picture for awhile. The big picture will only keep you paralyzed.
FlyLady can be tough to take if you're not "into it," but as others say, it's true in that she has some really good lessons about overcoming big-picture-itis. What probably needs to happen now is for you to break the work down into manageable tasks, and focus on each one as you are doing it, without getting sidetracked by the rest. It doesn't matter if you've got a stack of boxes to the ceiling in every other corner if you can get one corner slowly cleared out. One corner will be eventually followed by another corner, and another. Once you deal with the clutter, the decorating will start to come together on it's own. As someone who's gone from an embarrassing mess (at one point, I wouldn't even let my best friend in the apartment) to a cute (IMHO) little apartment, I can promise you this.
Don't worry about where to start. Start where you are. Stop what you are doing right now, turn to the left or to the right, and just start. You can do it even if you only put in that 15 minutes at a time, as others have described. I did it, and I have a disability that doesn't let me do more than 15 minutes at a time. (It took me a month to paint my living room - and that was with family help - because I could only do one wall per week.) Don't worry about doing it perfectly. "Perfect" is another barrier that will keep you paralyzed.
And if you can, do try and use the tools that FlyLady offers for free on her website, and/or through her e-list. The one thing I love about FlyLady that is different from a lot of other organizing tools is that FlyLady herself is a recovering clutterbug like the rest of us. She understands how we think!
Hey Marisa - I've never had anyone pack for me, but I hired movers when I moved in here, and after doing that, I will never move my own crap again! It was such a sweet relief not to have to deal with lifting all that heavy crap. Just make sure you mark which items/boxes go in which rooms, and it will be less work for you when unpacking.
I keep my magazine pages in a couple of file folders in my filing system, though ideally I'd like to get them into clear pockets in a binder. This is not a priority for me right now, though, so it will probably be a year or two before it happens!
I haven't solved the loose pages problem in any systematic way, but Container Store sells super-cheap cardboard (packing ) boxes that have a "footprint" of just larger than 8-1/2 x 11, and that's where they are now. And where they will stay until my next project-- turning my front closet into a built-in office-- becomes a reality.
If you have the resources to do so HIRE PROFESSIONAL MOVERS and have them PACK. But be prepared... they pack LIGHTNING fast, so make sure you know what's going in what box.
Wallpaper!!!!! Let's get hanging!!!!!
A new subject. I want to hang some wallcovering!
My small circa 1816 "skylighted" NYC garret has been undergoing renovation by my own hands. I've taken many pictures throughout the process. And will now storename drop. Send pictures when done.
It started when I purchased a little 1930 Euro-deco chrome tube and black lacquer side table at ABC that was reduced from $1295 to $50 that I painstakingly and gently restored. Next I bought a new low sexxxxxxy 60-inch $7,000 white leather italian sofa from Property in SoHo, on sale at a Crate and Barrel price. Then came Eileen Gray Tivoli table that was reduced from $3000 to $400 at a store closing(missing a critical, yet replaceable part from the German manufacturer Cubicom. Finally two exquisitely comfortable tan leather lounges from Dialogica. Expensive, even though they were less than 50% of original price. Last of all I got three vintage tomato red fabric covered 1980 Knoll Breuer chairs with arms, like the ones that usually have caning. All these pieces are comfortable.
Meanwhile, I spent many months selling off my old furniture, some mission stuff, some mid-century stuff, some Door Store, some IKEA, some 18th country antiques with varied results to NYC dealers, stores like Aero, Ebay, or ultimately the sidewalk, so it would go to a new home. Acquisitioning is far easier and more fun than the painful de-acquisitioning process!
Buying the highest quality (on-sale) is better way than cheaping it out. This being said, I am about to buy a table from West Elm.....once it goes on sale!
Now I need some help hanging 48-wide flat/matte beige wallpaper I bought on e-Bay for $76. Probably worth $500.
Almost finished preparing the walls after messy spackling of 799 cracks and about to apply sizing. James Madison was President when these walls were constructed. This has taken many months, as my work life gets in the way. One evening prep=two days working=one day cleanup. Dusty as hell and I have to always cover up and protect the precious new furniture.
Now I am looking for a professional to come in and hang the four foot wide wall covering. This type is generally used for commercial applications (offices, museums, hospitals)and has to be done perfectly, and I don't want to screw it up myself! It will be a one day job for a pro, perhaps two.
Does anyone have a true pro to recommend for this smallish job? Like 300-400 a day??
Meanwhile, I must say just how great your site is. I have been snooping it ever since it was mentioned in the NYT's. It's changed little from it's original labor of love, and that's been rewarded by all your commercial stuff, new LA office. Your devotion to small apartments is very much appreciated. I would have loved have gone to your sale, but less is more, and most of us already have enough!Thank God we are not Hurricane survivors without anything.
I hope you can get the wallpaper thread started. It was is only last week when you said you saw wall paper in your future. By the way, the magazine by that name is annoying.
(Kindly do not post my e-mail address)
I finally started tackling one of my biggest looming projects, after the times published an article today on how to do it properly:
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/10/01/business/01docs.ready.html
My paper files were only half-organised until earlier today. Usually I just hide away my old filing envelopes and hope I never need anything from them, but today I went through and actually cleared out all the old ones and put everything important together in one folder. I filled two large-ish boxes with shredding, and I'm proud of my little pile of empty envelopes. I also bought a few little thumb drives so I can have at least one backup with my mother and two in my house. Tomorrow I go through the very last of envelope. Then, I'll just need to start scanning the most important stuff. I'm pretty proud of my little filing adventure. This morning, I couldn't tell you which folder the deed to my house was in, but now I have everything nicely arranged so I can store only the things I really need to have around...
Mary, thanks so much for posting this link - I hadn't seen that article, and getting together my disaster plan and docs is on my list of things to do. This article has some wonderful electronic solutions to make this really easy.
JMC--
I'd suggest submitting your wallpaper question to the site as a "Good Question". I think it might get lost/buried here, and it is a good question. Submit it with a photo of some sort and it gets pushed to the top of the line.
Pixie -- You're welcome! They also had an article around a month ago with a list of things to get to stock up for emergencies... I don't have the link, but I clipped out the image that listed the basic things to get. If anyone wants that, just email me...
Marisa-
I've moved NUMEROUS times, and here are some things that I've discovered when moving:
1) That whole de-cluttering thing is a good start, because you do not want to move things that you're sure you'll want to throw out once you get there.
2) How much furniture you actually get rid of, however, depends on whether you're moving to a bigger or a smaller place; prematurely throwing out a piece of furniture that could have been useful will seem wasteful, but be really sure that you really do love it, and/or that it's unique enough to not be able to replace easily and economically once you're there.
3) For actually packing, make sure that you keep an "open me first" box around, so that as the VERY last thing before you move, you fill it with the very first things you'll need there -- your telephone, your answering machine, and certain other things that you know you'll need.
4) My apartments have all been too small (moving in AND out of) to even be able to afford to waste space DURING the moving process! So, instead of boxes you get from liquor stores (however sturday and free they may be), DO go ahead and get some boxes from Staples or somewhere that are meant to store file folders in. Besides being perfect for files (they tend to be Legal Size X Letter Size), they're great for books, because they're not so huge that you'll kill your back (or your friends' backs, or your moving guys' backs) while schlepping them. For one thing, they will stack BEAUTIFULLY and neatly as high as you need them to, so that you minimize the floor space they need to take up (assorted-sized boxes tend to stack in a very precarious way).
5) Buy some computer-printer-friendly labels that are the size of full letter-sized sheets. On your computer go ahead and use an enormous type face to indicate the contents of the box, and go ahead and print out enough to put them on ALL FOUR sides of each box, so that it doesn't matter how they get stacked -- you'll always know what's in them. Especially if you end up needing to put some of them in storage once you arrive at your new destination. I once had to move the offices of a horrible lawyer that I worked for, and all his law books had to be packed up and identified, and kept in order during the move. So, by doing the thing on the computer, I was able to not have to re-type the name of the set, and only change for each one which particular years worth of it were in that particular box. It was very, very useful.
6) If you're one of those people whose place is VERY cluttered and VERY full, and yet you know where every single thing is, then you're like this one friend of mine that I helped move after over 25 years in one place and had an amazingly huge number of books. So, in some cases we indicated "Art Books 1 of 6" etc., on the sides of the boxes. But in some cases, we just had to say "Left Window in Living Room" for the stuff that had been piled in the little niche of that particular window. By doing that, since he knew where everything HAD been, when we actually installed shelving in the new place, and organized it all, he knew where to find things by the indications on the boxes of the previous locations of its contents.
By the way, that thing about using those letter x legal sized boxes is also wonderful when the actual moving happens, because they stack beautifully on a hand-truck, and are very easily to stack in the back of the moving van or truck. Seriously. No. Really. I mean it.
MJ-
I was (and still am to some extent) in your place. I finally got some professional help- an organizer who helped me unpack the remaining boxes I had from my move a year ago (several of those boxes have never been opened through 3 moves!) and find places for the stuff. She also set up a filing system for me and put everything away. I really wanted to just leave and come back and have everything done, which it was mostly. I helped with going through things (deciding which shoes to keep, etc) which was quite refreshing. I find that the upkeep is not as overwhelming as the initial de-cluttering. Not that I haven't gone back to my old bad habits, but it's at least more manageable now.
MJ -- It took me two years to really move into and decorate the studio I live in. Luckily I moved from a 9x10 bedroom into my current space, but I still had more stuff than I needed and the wrong stuff for a place that was mine all mine. Other people here have given you some great advice, so here's mine -- give yourself time. It'll take a while and it really is a lot of work. Tackle one thing at a time. Make a wish list, rather than a to-do list, so you feel less guilty and can put cooler ideas on it without feeling bad if you cross them off without doing them.