apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

Hmm. I don't actually HATE this craft, but it annoys me a bit: those decorative tea towels with the crocheted handle attached to the top, ubiquitous in old-lady kitchens. I mean, I get the purpose. I just don't LIKE them.

(I do, however, actually have one in my kitchen. My husband was working in a nursing home for a day and couldn't resist buying one from a crafty 97-year-old lady. Sigh.)

"time out kids"...
life size dolls
you stick in the corner
they were pretty
creepy

crochet top kitchen towels, yuck. Looks ugly and makes the towel difficult to use.

Anything macrame. :)

LOL, that doll cozy!

Macrame owls! There was one in our laundry room when we moved into our house, and it made me jump every single time I opened the door.

My mom had a version of the toilet paper cozy that had a crocheted poodle's head with button eyes instead of the doll. That was pretty awful.

Macrame anything & Tole painted items *shivers*

My peeves are more pseudo crafts because they require no skills: coloured sand layered in glass mayonnaise jars and twigs with anything glued on.

anything decorative made out of tampons

Silk floral centerpieces...yikes!!

ugh! scrolling upon that doll/tp cozy picture just made me queezy! :(

i definitely hated those things! and anything involving crochet/doillies really.

In my early 20s I used to make picture frames, waste bins and Christmas wreathes out of empty cigarette packs. In retrospect, they were pretty tacky.

Definately the tp cozy. My daughter bought a lime green one topped by a poodle at a garage sale that I keep trying to slip in the trash but she catches me. It's hideous!

Plastic canvas "needlepoint" cozies, you can make whole matching sets for your bathroom! Tissue holders, TP holders, cotton ball holders, you name it!

Ditto on the crochet dolls and the kitchen towels. And almost anything you can buy at a christmas bazaar. Sorry, I'm a snob...

I second the "time-out kid" comment. They were especially creepy if you turned one around and found that nobody had bothered to embroider a face on it. Eeek!

Padded picture frames with lace edging!

My mother has given me those crochet-top kitchen towels two Christmases in a row, and I hate them. I can't get rid of them either, because she would notice.

time out kids, those coin purses made out of baby socks, wood blocks covered in shells, plastic bead and safety pin designs usually for pins, and shrinky dinks

Am I the only one who actually likes the crocheted doll toilet paper cozy?

Self-righteous crafting - It is handmade so it is automatically prettier/greener/more precious/better all around than you're purchased item. Often it's not.

For my wedding I received a glass cube stuffed with Christmas lights with our invitation glued on the front with puffy paint and stickers surrounding it. It's worse than you can imagine and it is NOT a precious keepsake.

jean pocket purses. They're hideous. No excuse for them.

OMG! I thought that the crocheted toilet paper doll was a Portuguese exclusive!

Crochet taken very “seriously�: crochet protectors for the couch’s arms and head and… crochet little purse for your cellular phone!

Answering suzy8track: not possible, the doll is beyond kitsch.

Ghastly, but even worse the twee-ness behind having to hide a spare roll.

You're not the only one, Suzy! I used to hate things like that and the plastic canvas needlepoint cozies that Minyuette mentioned, but now I just think they're tackily hilarious.

My least liked craft would probably have to be wire-wrapped jewelry. I'm sure a lot of people make it and some of it looks nice, but for the most part, it is just not my style. Especially the ones that look like the maker just wadded up a ball of wire and haphazardly strung a couple beads on for good measure. Just ends up looking like the big bang in jewelry form.

I was going to post something else, until I read "Time Out Kids", and now that's all I can think of. Yeah, all kinds of awful!

they are indeed tackily hilarious, but one has to hide them away...

Meanwhile I found some pictures of the protectors I mentioned:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_vkwS-3u1uao/Spb9VdJQsEI/AAAAAAAAAak/IwuuP_l9Q5o/s1600/Protetor%2Bde%2Bsof%C3%A1%2B013.jpg
these ones I had never seen
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vkwS-3u1uao/Spb9VLl_jFI/AAAAAAAAAac/mVN_4a4ld7E/s1600/Protetor%2Bde%2Bsof%C3%A1%2B009.jpg

and… I also found this
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_vkwS-3u1uao/SczWeCTRHwI/AAAAAAAAAJ0/eX_BnF180zY/s1600/croche%2B003.jpg
a crochet trash can!!!

Macrame plant holders with a big tassel hanging off the end. Anything made using seasonal fabrics. Pantyhose repurposed as anything.

FLOAM.

I dislike crocheted pot holders - they serve the intended but they are just so ugly! Also, city dwellers may not know what I am talking about but there used to be hese wooden lawn "ornaments" painted as if an old lady were bending forward to weed the garden in a pose that showed her knickers and doughy knees. If that isn't the height of tackiness, I don't know what is unless it is the companion piece fof the above, a wooden figure of an old man bending over next to the old lady ornament. Just plain weird.

It's not the craft, it's what you do with it.

Doilies in grannies homes: awful. Doilies used as snowflakes in a Christmas MS Living: wonderful !

Still, anything that covers a roll of toilet paper cannot be beautiful. Tacky and funny, yes. Beautiful, no.

I have a personal pet peeve: the crochet afghan. I know you guys in the US find them wonderful. I have a handful I'm willing to send for free.

Since i'm not that crafty, i love doing paint by numbers, but apparently the entire PBN world only likes landscapes or animals. Any kind of modern paint by number is very hard to come by! update my one and only semi-craft project please!

LOL, chesterandtrudy. So true! I also love that your comment sort of read like a poem.

has no one else ever gotten plastic hangers that have a crocheted cover on them?.....ugh....i suppose the cover is to keep thing from slipping off but they are hideous especially in bright colors left over from other projects!!!

Clampers-I agree with you. Crafts like the TP doll make me laugh. I don't get uptight about them.

lol Motherbear — i totally remember those wood cutouts of the fat lady bending over! my grandma's neighbor had one, and even as a kid i thought it was tacky!

Amen to all of thee above. And I second the puffy paint motion. Especially on sweatshirts in kitty and teddy bear designs. Ugh!

Whimsical creatures made from sea shells circa 1979! Those tiny beaded purses.

You should go to http://craftastrophe.net/ and http://whatnottocrochet.wordpress.com/ for some really crafty awfulness! Craftastrophe does have some really cool crafts, but most of them just make you wonder 'what were they thinking?!?' (Both sites only make fun of crafts that are being sold or have patterns posted online, so they're not bashing amateur crafters) CakeWrecks is also an awesome site for fugliness in cake form: http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/

Glad to see that I'm not the only one who appreciates kitsch!

Doilies. They make me cringe.

These comments are craptastic.

When I was a kid my neighbor had 2 regular white mailboxes mounted side by side. One had her house numbers painted on it and was for mail. The second was mounted 15 feet above the first and had 'AIR MAIL' painted on the side. Twenty years later, it's still there.

My great-aunt had one of those doll toilet-paper-roll cozies. I remember finding it fascinating as a kid.

On the topic of gifts, I wish I got more hand-crafted ones (and I'm not talking so much about "professional" stuff purchased from Etsy sellers, though I do love that site). There's something cool about a gift that someone made themselves, even if it's useless/ugly.

That said, add me to the list of people who hate the time-out kids.

What? I love Macrame! I'm with chesterandtrudy on this.
The 'time out kids' or 'hide and seek' life sized dolls dressed in real kid's clothes and placed around a room are horrifying... even before you realized that they never gave them a face.

I think I can top all of you. remember or have you seen those crocheted hats- crocheted linking beer cans?

I found one and its scary because these are still made-
http://community.livejournal.com/ugly_crap/429547.html

But when crochet is cute its cute-
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_SqhhJb_P3Kk/SbP_AfP9dCI/AAAAAAAAFqw/TL4OEU6r1Io/s400/dog crochet bonnet.jpg

I like the crochet & doll toilet paper cozies. It goes back to my childhood. My great-grandmother and my aunt had them in their bathrooms. They were great women. I used to sit on the can and play with the cozies to make sure they had legs! Are the things tacky? Yes! But they bring back fond memories.

Crafts I hate:
Silk flower arrangements
Anything knit with "fun fur"
Anything reeking of cinnamon
Time out kids
Anything stuck into a Styrofoam mold shaped thingy

Macrame anything - but especially macrame plant holders. Eeew!

tp does not need a cozy.

what is it gonna catch...a cold? c'mon

ok here is my list

those crazy dolls in the corner
tp cozies
silk flowers ( hello dust collectors)
decorative towels( why even bother having them if i cant touch them)

"Craft Mall" crafts.

Hearts cut out in wood or painted on. Painted wood in patriotic colors, mauve or country blue. Lace on brown picture frames. Dried flowers glued to everything. Cutesy bears stenciled on anything.

Just your average "craft mall' stuff. Blech.

Anything that collects dust like that annoys the crap out of me. I can clean a lantern or a bottle easily, but how the heck do you clean a crocheted doll? You can't exactly throw it in the washing machine. I suppose you could beat the dust out of it, but it's never really clean that way. Besides all that, they're creepy!

I agree with LizinCo. Craft mall stuff is irritating to look at. My grandmother used to make and sell that kind of stuff and, while a little wooden doll with crazy hair that says "Housework makes you ugly" is funny for about .000026 seconds, the amusement stops there. Get it out of my house.

My mum made the whole family crocheted bedspreads. They weren't THAT ugly, but very heavy, and when you were reading or lounging on the bed, you got a crochet-pattern on your butt or elbows or any other unprotected body part....

Sandra_margarete you are so right- crochet is the national craft of Portuguese grannies! My grandma's and great gran's houses were these musuems of crochet gone very very wrong.

The TP cozy was a dog tho, not a doll. my fuzzy memory suggests the creepy doll head perhaps rested atop the fake dress body which concealed the plunger? or was crocheted onto a broom? Something tall. The trash can was crocheted too, and the tissue box of course had had a nice gingham cozy sewn for it, with ricrac edging.

There was also a burlap and felted newspaper...sling...I guess I'd call it that went over the door, lots of wooden country cute cut outs with key hooks, silk flowers and plastic butterflies trapped inside bell jars atop resin "driftwood"
All the planters were macramed, all the windows were suncatchered. It was this crazy fantasy land for a kid. I loved it then, it would kill me now.

when I was little our neighbor would host an annual craft sale at christmas time. most of the stuff was relatively well-made... but was extremely tacky. nonetheless I begged her to buy a rock painted like a curled up cat (seven-year-olds aren't known for sophisticated taste). though even I grew to know how tacky it was it stuck around for quite a while... she only just got rid of it a year ago when they gutted their kitchen.

@MKW: Can't believe that just today I needed and was wishing I had kept at least one of the many crochet hangers my mom made for me from scraps. Honestly, tho, they really did keep slippery things from sliding off. Our TP holder was a plastic mouse wearing a dress and hat.

Whoever made the Portuguese comment is SO right! I thought my Portuguese relatives had the choke hold on the creepy crocheted dollies. Even now, the picture gives me a memory of that old-lady smell, and of a small terrified child sitting on the loo trying to figure out where the TP is and how to get it without touching the dolls, in a house where you were told that the dolls are not for touching. (Sinister laughter.)

Chesterandtrudy--

Holy crap, I recently visited a chiropractic office with those in the corners. Not appropriate for the environment. Or any environment.

I find a cozy of any kind to be highly amusing. The most trite thing I've seen are wooden yard ornaments shaped like the backside of a bent over person, complete with checkered drawers and polka dot panties, when you're driving by it looks like someone is bent over in the garden.

That being said, I can certainly appreciate the intricate heirloom-quality doilies and tasteful baby booties my ma-in-law crochets (mind you, she does not annually foist these items upon family members– she displays a few alongside her herbs & produce on her table @ the local farmers market, and they sell for a price commensurate to their limited number and her level of skill).

ÃœBER UGLY = wooden shelves with heart shapes cut out of them, with pegs that you hang country blue decorative soaps-on-a-rope that are also shaped like hearts

kinda like this: http://gonecountryantiques.com/pictures/Shelf-with-Heart-and-Pegs%281%29.JPG

http://hickscountrystore.com/images/heart_shelf2_iyvq.jpg

I can't stand anything with cutesy sayings on it. No, I will not "live laugh love" and I don't take orders from inanimate objects, dammit!

Now, now LizinCo, those 80s country crafts will be back. I give it about another 10 years, maybe less. Who would have thought the 70s would be back with such flair--that pyrex would be collectible and orange would be the in color for kitchens? 15 years ago those would have made most folks shudder...

I also hate those time out kids. My sister used to make those. She has since "graduated" to making reborn dolls. They creep me out too because they are so lifelike. The creepy part is to see grown women carrying them around like they are real babies. Plus, part of the process involves baking them in the oven and imagine seeing one of these almost finished in the oven! http://www.reborndollhouse.com/reborn-doll-photo-gallery

@safarikate: Check out http://craftfail.com too!

Anything that is crocheted/knitted just because it can be. Just because you can, does NOT mean you should. (This is where crap like crocheted-toilet paper-doll-cozies are concerned.) I really think that you should use media that's appropriate to your project and not just whatever you think of mish-mashing. Now I'm not discouraging experimentation, I just think it would be more beneficial (and cool) to actually learn new skills instead of giving yourself a crutch and limiting yourself to just one trade skill. (I.E. making EVERYTHING out of yarn!) Am I the only one that feels this way?