apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

YAY!

Dude, GUINEA pig.

I love your book, I love your website, but most of all I love what you are promoting--doing more with less. It is refreshing and inspiring and has motivated me to make my house a home, despite its small size. That's what I got out of the Oprah show. I'm sorry that you (and your family) were attacked or maligned in any way on the message boards. Thank you, thank you, thank you for all that you've done. From Tara in San Francisco. :)

love your site and what you are doing, sorry that you are under attack. the same people that you are generously helping are acting a little too much like jealous brats....i hope you don't shy away from putting all this info out on the web, i look forward to everything that you post. thank you!

That, my friends, is what you call "class."

Thank you, Maxwell and Sara Kate.

Good for you, Maxwell. I don't live in a big city and I don't have an apartment, but I do like your message and general messages about living simpler lives in the pursuit of happiness.

Keep up the good work. Welcome to parenting from a new parent himself. Many are enjoying and benefiting from what you are doing.

--Jim

I think you have the right to run this site however you wish to. It is your site and you make the rules.

One thing I will say is that I had no idea you had a place to escape to from your small apartment until the flap that happened before this one a couple of months ago. Until then, I thought your family really did have to function full time in your tiny space.

Having even a weekend place to get away to absolves you from many decisions that most of us coping with small spaces full time have to make - like keeping or getting rid of a piece of furniture we like but don't have room for, storing out of season items, and just having room to strech out and breathe. In this regard, I do think you were being a little disingenuous.

Mia -- clearly not the point. Give the man a break.

as a daily reader, i somehow missed the abuse you are referring to, and i feel embarrassed for the readership that you would have to defend yourself in any way. i care only about the fact that I can come here every day and find inspiration to make the most of my means and of my space. i'm sure you will get many notes of support to this degree, and i humbly add my name to the list. thanks for the wonderful work.

It is unfortunate that you had to defend yourselves on your own turf (or in your tiny apartment, as it were), but well said. Salvador Dali once said "The thermometer of success is merely the jealousy of the malcontents". Based on that, congratulations on the Oprah appearance, the book, the successful website and best wishes on your future endeavors.

Dear Maxwell, Sara Kate, Oliver, and Ursula,

Thank you for your explanations, although I'm saddened that you've had to deal with so much snark. Since I discovered Apartment Therapy a few years ago, it has given me much-needed inspiration. I check in several (many) times a day because I almost always find something or someone interesting. For the most part the people who post here are amazing. I cannot number the times I have benefitted from their advice or suggestions. And my life is a lot better for it (complete closet reorganization anyone?).

Maybe I did "drink the koolaid" but I consider you friends whose lives and lifestyle make my world a more sane and comfortable place.

Thank you for everything.

Thank you both for all your hard work. This is a wonderful site and I appreciate what you do.

matilda,

exactly!

Maxwell, I don't believe an apology from you or your family should have been necessary, but it is very courteous and generous of you to offer this response to the Oprah thread negativity brought out by your greater visibility. Hope you're recovered from your illness soon and back to enjoy your lovely little home.

Maxwell,

The responses from you and you and Sara Kate are very gracious. Please keep up the good work, both on and off the Apartment Therapy site.

Hello,

First I want to say, TMI in your explanation. Second, I mentioned that Brooklyn would be a really nice place for your child to grow up. There are great communities there,in parkslope or fort green, clinton hill, or even bedstuy. Really I just wanted to let you know that you should really consider this for your baby. I think that you are going to be rich one day very soon, because of the success of this site. Good luck.

Fourth paragraph, don't forget, i before e except after c....

I'm sorry, Max and fam, that you had to go through this. The Oprah show is waiting for my on my DVR right now, as I've yet to watch it. I do feel it is unfair for people to critisize the way you live. You are a person. A human.

Maybe you guys should have mentioned the home in the Hamptons. Maybe not. If it was a mistake, you are allowed that. Just becuase you have a wildly (and fantastic) site, does not mean you can understand everything that readers might think or assume.

I beleive you are allowed some measure of privacy, and like someone said, it's your site, you make the rules.

Have some chicken soup and feel better.

I missed a lot of the drama, and I'm glad I did. It's evident to me that you have worked very hard for what you have, and I feel bad that that things got so out of hand that you had to defend your lifestyle and your work. People who pick at, attack, and spread gossip are typically jealous folks with low self-esteem.

I don't have an apartment, we own a house but I have learned a lot from you. I bought your book, I read the forum and I'm working on applying your techniques to our home. Please count me in with the group who wants to see you continue to succeed and wishes you and your family nothing but the best.

Frankly I don't care about the personal lives of who owns this site. I love coming here for the inspiring pictures, problem solving and sharing anything I find.

Although I admire M&SK for living a simply as they do, I hardly find it astonishing or a betrayal that they actually don't spend everyday of the year in their small space. Before I was married, I lived with my then fiance and his dog for only a month in his less than 400sqft converted garage apartment while in transition of moving to the house we have now. To me, there's no way 3 people could live in 250 every single day of the year and not go mad.

I didn't read the Oprah thread incident but what it sounds like is that M&SK's ethics were in question. Well what about the ethics of those who were doing the questioning when they posted the AT editors' personal info? Talk about hypocritical.

Thank you for this site. I visit almost daily.
And people, lighten up!

Thanks for taking the time to try to explain some things even though you never had to.

After this whole thing I feel I have more respect for this site and feel more a part of a community. It was good to see people really step up and defend what they think is good and right [both sides] with intelligence and passion.

But for the others.. well..apparently, the best way to destract the naysayers and the 'malcontents' is too give them some gramatical errurs so they have somethin else two complain about.

If you're going to have a public web site, write a book instructing people how to live, and go on Oprah, you really ought not be surprised when some of the public reacts in a manner that may be less than laudatory. The public arena is for dialogue, not monologue. At this point you've made yourself a public figure and the rest... well it comes with the territory. Celebrity, however fleeting, takes its toll. If you can't stand the heat... design a bigger kitchen.

i don't think the spelling snaps are necessary... the guy has the flu for crack's sake!

no explanation or apology necessary! your tiny apartment is lovely and inspiring, even if you aren't there a few days out of the year. as the earlier post said, how many of us are in our homes *365 days a year*? we all take breaks and vacations. i'm sorry the oprah post dissolved into madness (i stopped reading when people were getting mean), but i know that there are a ton of people who love the site, do not feel betrayed or misled, and support you!

Ralph - AWESOME idea!!!!!! sign me up for the Charter Subscription!

it's too bad the founders of this site have to defend themselves and their family when i see the site being about resources, creativity and having fun with small spaces no matter where they are. when it becomes a forum for judging people based upon some sort of ideology made up by self important, self-entitled small space expert philosophers than it becomes more of a "scene." do we read books and enjoy and learn from them for what they offer and then change our minds because we find out the author did something we do not approve of? not to say there is anything to disapprove of in this case but according to some people there are. "disengenious" because someone has a cottage in the woods and a small space in the city? maybe one day that person will learn to think outside of their own little small space too and be happy. but for now i'm sure they are happy in their little "scene" that judges others who don't fit into it. sounds like they need to get out a little bit more.

People were just being ridiculous. This is my favorite blog. You guys need to start a print magazine, though.

I do agree w/ Matilda's point - irregardless of who owns what - I think that someone who doesn't have access to a weekend retreat has more psychological and physical "baggage" to deal with. Its one thing to dash off to the local coffee shop or park to get away from the 4 walls that are closing in on you versus knowing that should the fancy strike, you could at the drop of a hat go to you second home (vacations don’t count).

Speaking for myself - having a second home in the country means that all the things we can't have in town, our extensive book collections, vegetable “patch”, a place for our daughter to run around outdoors - allows us to sacrifice having those amenities for a smaller space in town close to our jobs etc. We KNOW that we have room to stretch out and breathe and it does put us at a psychological advantage over someone who doesn’t and has to cope with permanently making those decisions.

The only gripe that I have with the site is that as it has grown and gotten more popular, it has become less personal. Oh, and Brooklyn is a great place to live!

Now I just need help finding cool rubber flooring in funky colours!

Maxwell:

I've been very much inspired by your design and living style since I first saw your designs/organization style on Mission Organization years ago. I am saddened that you had to give a long explanation about your "simple living" philosophy and give more private details than we deserve to know. I loved the Oprah episode. It inspired me to find joy and comfort from the things we own and to get rid of the excess that we don't need. I am planning to pass along all the things in storage to others that can use them, so I can live in peace with the space that I have. I wish you three much happiness in your "home" and enjoy the time that Ursula is herself small. Good luck.

Maxwell: I would like to know if AT intends to repost the Oprah thread (even redacted to take out whatever, if anything, was "outside the rules," as you suggest). You (or SaraKate) have twice stated that the taking down of the thread was "temporary." If you will not be reposting even an edited thread, would you mind sharing your thoughts as to why not? Thanks.

I did read most of the above mentioned thread and I fount the attempts at lashing out at someone advocating living simply and happily within one's means utterly shocking. I am from Birmingham, Alabama and a 21 year old college student who cannot afford the outlandish tuition prices as well as a tiny apartment that is overly priced (which is finally about to change!!). I am a design student at heart and come here for inspiration on how to make my apartment a place for me and an escape from the world; to surround myself with beautiful things that don't cost me an arm and a leg. It inspires me to create more artwork and to maybe be able to use it for my income. I look at this site many many times a day and am filled with enoyment and excitement that someone out there is helping communities pool their resources and make everyone's life a tad easier - be it by posting where you can purchase something, or wonderful DIY projects. I commend you on your efforts thus far and support you in future endeavors. Thank you for being such an important part in my life and inspiring me to creatively express myself more in life.
P.S. I watched my Oprah show on a VHS and taped over Picket Fences for it. ;-)

I was kind of scratching my head about why our hosts hadn't weighed in on the hoopla; now it makes sense -- being sick and being away.

Anyway... that's kind of the way life is in a fishbowl, and although they're not filthy rich yet, it sounds like this was good practice for when they absolutely will be.

And on the off-chance they don't ever get rich, it sounds like they will always be at least relatively happy and well-adjusted.

Neal--irregardless will never ever ever be a word.

Neal,

I saw them use this coin pattern rubber garage flooring on a decorating show where they redid a kids room. They used yellow, and it looked pretty cool.

http://www.floorjunkies.com/

oh - and irregardless isn't a word - its regardless

It isn't a good statement of our social etiquette that someone can be doing a wonderful job and we are all reaping the rewards of that work, but what is given back is negativity. Why does anyone think he has the right to form opinions or have expectations of people because they do him a service which, by the way, is offered without payment?

I wish you and your family the best. And, as a mother of a toddler, I'm relieved to hear you have somewhere else (even for a weekend) to go because you will need that space sooner than you think.

i shouldn't be one to correct someone - i just saw i misspelled found!

Missed the whole thread, up all night (now in my 30th hour) working on transcripts and the web was off limits.
Hey man, you don't owe us your life story. i honestly hope you make your home life a little more scarce on these pages. You're a nice family and all, but i would be much more guarded about putting so much of myself out there, to the point where some cretins actually do think they "know you" and want to challenge you to "come clean" about your private life.

This site is much bigger than Maxwell. Even if he has the advantage of a big Hamptons home, most people who post/share photos of their homes do not. I don't much care if Maxwell is fudging or not, because I get so many good ideas and inspiration from AT. Those who attacked him would do well to stop reading the site if they find it so offensive.

First of all, I am so grateful that you created AT, and thankful for all that you and the other contributors give to us. It’s something I eagerly look forward to every day.

And it was very generous of you to share your story with us. You don’t have to justify your means (however big or small) to any of us. That said, I did find your story very interesting and inspiring. So thanks. And I really appreciate the positive tone you set throughout the site. It’s rather remarkable and does not go unnoticed. A good example for all of us.

Wishing you, Sara Kate and Ursula boundless abundance! You deserve it!

I'm responding here to the family message and to Maxwell's. You are all showing tremendous grace under pressure. I applaud you for that.

I must say in all honesty, though, that the primary concerns I expressed on the Oprah thread still remain:

1)There's a fundamental contradiction between claiming small living, yet living off the large resources that you have access to. I know that you are not rolling in money, and never thought that you were, but you do have resources that many people don't. Having resources is not, of course, by itself a problem -- I come from a comfortable, privileged, established background myself, and my family connections have opened doors for me. But, in my view, it becomes problematic if you present your lives as your laboratory. Some posters have expressed disappointment with you when they found out that you had another residence you could escape to. Although long-time readers of AT always knew this, I think that this aspect of your lives was sufficiently hidden from your more casual readership to have come as a surprise to them. The "365" statement on Oprah didn't help.

2)There's a contradiction between urging people to pare down, yet constantly pushing this or that new product. You will very likely disagree, but I do think you need to re-examine your message here

3)This is a less fundamental issue, but there's a contradiction between the simplicity and organization your site proclaims, and the total chaos of how it's actually organized and run.

In the interests of full disclosure, let me also repeat another more fundamental objection that I have to the AT philosophy: small is not beautiful. Small is what people have to put up with when they live in places like New York or Bombay or Tokyo where real-estate prices are out of control. Small means having no room of your own, no privacy, no freedom to do as you please. It's oppressive and limiting, not ennobling and liberating. There's nothing beautiful about living in cramped quarters. I know two cases of teenagers who grew up in tiny apartments and suffered from psychological disorders because of the stress of constantly having people around.

People live small because they have to. It's dangerous to romanticize living that way (and it's wrong to do it when, privately, you have access to a lot more). It's certainly very useful to have a website that teaches people how to cope with the small spaces in which they are forced to live and the ensuing stresses. I admire those parts of this site that do that. But I do feel that one mustn't present tiny living as a Good Thing.

Maxwell and Sara Kate,
I continue to be absolutely amazed at the amount of information and photos about your lives that you post online and reveal to the world in other media. I guess with so much out there and esp. with the anonymity of blog posting, it's inevitable to have some bad stuff thrown your way. But I'm am also amazed at the balance and, yes, grace, as others have noted, with which you respond to these assaults. This cannot have been an easy thing to deal with and I admire and applaud you for how you responded. And thank you for taking down that vile thread. Keep up the good work and get healthy, Maxwell!

It seems that this Oprah thread has created somewhat of a new chapter for AT (management, readers and haters included). How about along with the vow of positive energy, we have a new rule -- no commenting on minor spelling or grammatical errors?

Everyone I know who watched the Oprah show that day (including me) thought it was a great. Your personal lives should not be under attack. Instead, people should use Apartment Therapy to their advantage, as it is a wonderful tool. It comes down to individual choice. If they are not interested in living in a small space and ridding themselves of unnecessary clutter, they should go about their business without indicting others. Thanks for your work on this site. I really enjoy it.

Just wanted to say... For all the good and happiness that AT brings-- I don't need to know Maxwell's life story. All I do know is that he (and all the AT staffers) is darn good at his job and I get the benefits for free! Hopefully those evil posters (I stopped reading it before it descended into madness apparently) have left the AT community or have decided to just chill-- for goodness sakes at the end of the day, isn't this just one of many websites you visit in a day?

Sigh - AT - correcting vocabulary one word at a time; irregardless that I “bastardized” the English language with a word that causes some debate on both sides on whether or not its usage will ever be universally accepted.

Thanks Ralph – I’ve seen a similar product at either Home Depot or Lowes, but am holding out for a local version that comes in sheet form which I’ve seen in a few UK deco mags.

AT,
i wish you would just end this particular comment thread. it's bringing out the "design dabblers." they thrive on negativity. we are small and beautiful when we look at the big picture.

I like to read about different ideas for living spaces and the way furniture etc fits into these spaces along with color etc.

I for one do not give a rats ass about this pedantic bullshit people drivel on about trying to prove their silly points.

But I also have the option of not reading those bits if i don't want to

A generous and thoughtful response to the devolution of the Oprah thread. We, all of us who have ever posted an opinion on this or any site, are participating in the earliest days of an experiment in communication and community. What happens when communicated language is, like the language of a locked journal, utterly free of out-of-the-web consequence? On this site, the result is so often overwhelmingly positive (no not always shiny sweet, but almost always refreshingly constructive and well-considered) that wild swings of free-flying cuts and ad hominem attacks that long ago left any realm of constructive context are doubly jarring. It will inevitably happen again. There will be another thing. People will be heard. Opinions will be voiced and there will likely be a move by some into personal attacks. But at least now it can be short-handed, “Are we really heading in the direction of the Oprah Thread again?”

This site has been my almost daily companion as we cut our square footage in half with the birth of our daughter. A move that was equal parts decision and necessity, it has been a joy and occasional struggle. It was this site, and those who participate in it, that eased the difficulties and helped us to see what we had. While watching the Oprah episode my husband suggested, if we ever buy a place, we keep things this small. Whatever the outlying snark, the heart of this site is inspiration. Thank you for all you have set in motion and continue to foster.

Design Dabbler is exactly right. i'm just glad he/she typed it all instead of me.

thanks to everyone who stood by their guns on the Oprah thread. and for those who didnt see the oprah thread, maxwell's comments above do not address many issues that were brought forth, although SK did say they would take the discussion of the ethical issues related the rent situation into consideration. Perhaps if the thread is truly only taken down "temporarily", you'll have an opportunity to read it.

someone yesterday commented that all the critical postings were wasted there. clearly they were not!

So, Design Dabbler, you see no value whatsoever in proposing to the people that might *have* to live small, that they do it gracefully, joyously, unapologetically and as beautifully and responsibly as possible?

You honestly see no value to that?

So wtf are you doing here, then?

And ps, there are people of means (more than yours, more than mine, more than the G-Rs) who do indeed chose to NOT live in 5000 square feet of Frontgate ostentation.

We breathlessly await pics of you manly pink bedroom, btw.

before someone beats me to it.. "choose"

I thought irregardless was funny :). I have a friend who says this. But, oh well....moving forward....

While I don't think an explanation was due from Maxwell, I do think it shows class. Yes, gaining fame usually means losing some privacy, however, I continue in my belief that personal attacks are, well, tacky, and unnecessary. There is a way to debate issues that doesn't always show up here. That's been my only point of discomfort - enough nasty posts prompts some of us to respond and then a cycle begins.

Perhaps the most interesting post here-in my mind-has been the one from elizabeth in AL - she has gained true knowledge from AT in her chosen field, and she expresses gratitude. How refreshing.

While the fact that you and your family live in a tiny apartment is interesting, to me it has always been one of the least interesting things about this site. I come here for the great work you do in putting everything together, and for the community you foster. I don't think you owed anybody an explanation about your personal finances. The site speaks for itself. Well done.

Okay, here are my two cents.

Maxwell has written MANY posts on the weekend place; when they painted the office/nursery purple before the baby was born, he asked if they should paint a room there all in yellow, etc. They even showed the best little chairs they had around their dining table. (I so want those chairs.) Just because someone cannot search the site and do some research before they attack someone is not his problem. Therefore, since he has mentioned the house numerous times, the term disingenuous does not fit. No matter what your feelings on a subject you should always do your research before you accuse anyone of anything.

In addition, even if they can make it to the house 2 weekends a month, they still have to exist in their apartment space FIVE days of the week.

As I see it, from what the Gillingham-Ryans have shown of the place in the Hamptons, it also follows their philosophy, with its sparse furnishings, lack of clutter, and calming feel. It's just on a larger scale. There is no problem with that, especially since this site is mostly focused on apartments and NOT houses.

P2 - as always, your posts are perfect. Love them.

Whenever I read this site (which is every day and somewhat obsessively), I marvel at the joyful, creative, funny, generous people who post here. And not just Maxwell and the other AT folk – but the community as a whole. I am full of admiration for this inspiring, talented group of people, and I’d like to think that the Oprah episode was just a temporary psychotic break from the constructive and positive dialogue that takes place here.

Like others who have posted before me, I’m puzzled by the urge to begrudge Maxwell and his family a little bounty and grace in their lives when they have given so much of themselves to AT. Having access to a country house (or three) and a financial safety net is a wonderful gift, not a sign of hypocrisy. I wish the entire AT team unlimited success so that we can all continue to benefit from your passion and vision.

Patrick,

why is it that your post (coming from an AT worshiper) is the first on this thread to become hostile? interesting, it reminds me of the Oprah post - the first people to become hostile were AT fanatics like yourself.

perhaps the Oprah thread would have gone very differently if the AT Fanatics like you were not quite so obsessively defensive.

now, i breathlessly await your response.

Well,l on the show they used the sheet as well - SO, just do an internet search "Coin Pattern rubber flooring" or "coin pattern Garage flooring" etc. you'll find it.

i've been a loyal reader of this blog for about 8 months. i didn't read the oprah thread (I wish I could now!), but i wanted to throw in a comment regarding the issue of whether it's hypocritical for the GRs to promote small living when they have family property in the hamptons (or wherever).

there has been a trend in the past few years of which AT is only one example (think of domino magazine, for instance) where a certain interpretation of "NYC living" has set a new standard for interior design. As far as I can tell, this means smaller-scale living, yes, but also a mix of high and low cost decor, graphic/modern visual trends, attention to detail, original objects you can't find "just anywhere” and (more recently) greener living. I have embraced this trend myself.

But I know that NYC is worlds apart from the rest of the country (especially non-urban areas), and that the people who live here are usually *very* well-off, regardless of occupation (or how absurdly small their apartments are). this is the reality of post-1990s New York! i don’t like it either, but wouldn’t it make more sense for those of us who think it’s wrong to work at changing our political and economic system (which has become decidedly more “neoliberal” and aimed at helping the wealthy over the past 30 years) than to get all huffy on a design blog?

I Heart you Guys! Nix the haters! Keep doing what you do and congrats on meeting the big O.

I am glad to see all the positive comments above. I didn't catch all the Wild Wild stuff, but was a bit saddened that you had to explain yourself. I do understand your response.

I enjoy your website and the message that you convey. It really resonates with me as I try to start my own design business in the Philly area. I am inspired by Apartment Therapy and use it as a reference frequently.

Wish you all the best.

Jackie (of course I am speaking to the original one!) you have made my day.

OMG - I actually have a decor related question...

Re: the coin patterned flooring, I have read that it is easy to maintain, that it is washable, however, has anyone here actually used it? I'm wondering if dirt becomes stuck to the edges of the raised pattern.

Since I have a hairy cat and minute little things flying around my apartment (art materials and jewelry making residue) I can't help but imagine that the relief of the flooring would be easy to clean. Any thoughts on this?

stephen--

You think that was hostile? Wow.

But, um, even if so, not aimed at the people who make this forum possible, correct? See any distinction?

And btw, I was sooooo not a contributor to that Oprah thread trainwreck. I believe you were one of the lovely gents wearing the conductor's hats, if indeed the same stephen.

And quite honestly, that thread was soooo not full of, or driven into the gutter, by any regulars that I recognized.

Patrick,

apology accepted.

elizabeth in AL: Seriously, your comments exhibit much more intelligence and grace than many of ours have lately, probably including mine. It's nice to see someone young(er) have brains, talent, and grace. It means that all is well - somewhere. :)

stephen--

nice come back

and make sure to introduce yourself at the next AT function

:-D I don't know how to put a big toothy smile in a blog....but...makes me wanna say "let's be friends!" ha ha. and that is a compliment that is taken to heart and very much appreciated.

patty,

I'll be wearing my pink peacock outfit. i hope we don't match!

You know...I made a mistake chiming in that Oprah thread the other day. From now on, let's just not repond to these negative, out-to-get-you bloggers.
Their tree leaves may rustle, but there won't be anyone there to listen. Of course, they will try (as they did with this one) to hoard all threads with their bad vibes, but again, the rest of us will just bypass their comments and continue on with our own.

Maxwell & Sara Kate, Thank you for AT!

Design Dabbler, since you disagree so strongly with the AT philosophy, why do you read/post to the site? I'm not being snarky, I'm genuinely curious.

Stephen: I remember commenting on that post numerous times attempting to get you to stop your rant and I also posted then that non of the "in" crowd were involved (I'm not the "in" crowd) except perhaps one.

Today's thread opened well and I just wonder why we can't keep it that way? Why can't we simply keep this thing civil? You still seem to be the only person holding on to this anger.

Oh, and to be clear, the first person ever to become hostile on the O thread was Steve R, and then you. You, Stephen. Not an AT regular.

thx for the search tip Ralph, it just didn't occur to me to use "coin pattern" in my searches, the ole google spat back a number of returns i hadn't seen before! cartwheelfactory.com has a product called soft floor tiles that i'll look into since they have a variety of bright colour options - most companies only do "dingy"

jackie,

"Why can't we simply keep this thing civil? You still seem to be the only person holding on to this anger. "

that's exactly what i was asking patrick.

and hopefully you'll be able to read the oprah thread again to see who said what.

this thread was opened by maxwell RE: OPRAH THREAD. there will be plenty of design threads after this.

Jackie i don't think the ridges are that high/deep? we have an OLD cat and a toddler who both leave debris in their paths so i think this is the perfect product for our entry way, which is curretly a rather gnarly lino product from god knows when - i don't want the hassle of pulling it up but have toyed with the idea of painting it - which of course would mean tossing my family out for a few days - hmmm now that might not be a bad idea!

Design Dabbler:

Some people do decide to live in a small place because they prefer it. I'm much happier in my small, cozy apartment than I was growing up in a big, lonely house. I feel comforted by the manageable size of my apartment. I'm sure that there is more to the "psychological disorders" of your two teenagers than the cramped spaces in which they lived. The apartment I've occupied for the past 13 years was previously my landlord's. He lived in it with his parents, wife, and three sons. None of them suffered any "psychological disorders" either. If you object to the apartment lifestyle, perhaps your time would be better spent by browsing websites which cater to spacious housing.

To Everyone:

Please ignore him. Attention seems to be fueling his rants.

I missed the entire Oprah thread. That said, I am a regular reader of AT (NY,LA,Chicago and SF). Maxwell may have referred to a Hampton home but I missed that as well? This does tend to remind me of the time that Martha Stewart held a $500 a plate dinner at her home. It was later determined that the fried chicken came from the Colonel. There was quite a stink over that. Silly for the attendees to think that Dinner at Martha's would = Martha cooked dinner? You decide.

Stephen:

GZgoingMod aka Geraldine has a good idea, and I will begin practicing that now.

I'm sure all of the upper management represented by each commenter here would agree: all of this drama is killing productivity.

Moral of story: we love our drama, our Anna Nicoles, our bald Britneys; we become little Simon Cowells everytime we think we know better than someone else.

I'm a lurker on this blog, but it is one of my favorites. I live in the suburbs and long for the simplicity, the "smallness," and the style of a smaller footprint. "Regardless" of what anyone says, there's a reason we all keep clicking back over to AT: we love it.

M and SK, keep it up.

p2, what were you implying you would you do if stephen introduced himself at the next AT function? it all sounds very threatening.
i think it's time to re-examine who's actually angry here...
and figure out a way to quell these cat fights.

I also think people are freaking out based on the words "Hampton home" with overblown visions of Georgica Pond, Lizzie Grubman running down the locals and P.Diddy's Hummer.

There are relatively humble abodes out there in the Hamptons... would people be getting so hung up if they had a "family cabin in the Catskills"?

Neal:

Ok, maybe I'll look into this. I have a small kitchen area and my work area where I want to cover the carpet and this product might be a good idea.

I will look into this further. How would you go about painting it? I have an extensive knowledge of paint (prior artsy career). Is this rubber? I would be curious to see what type of primer would be necessary.

To Maxwell: Bravo.

It never ceases to amaze me how many people comment so negatively. If the philosophy/spelling/content of the site is so unbearable and wrong, why even bother looking at it?

I (dare I say) CHOSE to live small. I could have had a place twice the size of the one I live in, if I wanted a bland McCondo with all the charm of a styrofoam plate. Living small is not necessarily a negative thing, I'll take the 850 sq ft loft in the old candy factory facing the Bunker Hill Monument over the 3000sq foot McMansion facing the other 3000sq ft McMansion 12 feet away any ol' day.

everyone should just take a deep breath, exhale, and click back on over the design part of the blog and RELAX - or stay here and show support. no one needs to argue. especially about who it is that's arguing. that's just silly.

heatehr--

oh dear lord.

I just meant that things said here, under the cover of anonymity, tend to be different than what someone would have the balls to say face-to-face, and that comment was meant to serve as a reminder that there is indeed also an actual physical, real-time AT community here in NYC.

Neal: I just re-read your last comment. I can't believe I thought you meant you were going to paint the coin tile.....oy.....ok, back to normal now.

ENOUGH ALREADY!! really does it matter. He who is without fault has cast the first stone I guess. It amazes me how trifling people can be. The family has explained, he has parents who own it's like the Dallas compound all family members own it by default. Sucks to be the rest of us whose 'rents were not able to afford us that. He works and he publishes. So you know what people, move on. Get your own and stop spoiling this site for the rest of us. I am getting a lot of ideas here as well as enjoying the lovely "regular" (for want of a better word) homes not the high-brow stuff in printed mags. Can we just leave them alone now.
Maxwell, the explanation was totally unnecessary. You've shown the haters your throat.

I'm completely out of the loop as far as the Oprah drama is concerned, but I have to respond to Design Dabbler's statement that small is not beautiful. To me, living small is one of the most beautiful things that we can do in this era of tremendous waste and excess.

Small means that I am constantly surrounded by things that I truly love.

Small means that I am not forced to fill extra space with meaningless possessions that I must waste my life keeping clean/updated for the enjoyment of...no one.

for real mat

I have a "family home" on the Cape. Its roof is caving in, and the windows need to be replaced (yes, all of them), and it's settled so far (due to shoddy construction and lack of a proper foundation) that furniture shifts in the night. It is, in short, the very shittiest house on the Cape, but people do get all worked up when I mention it. The fact is that nothing my family owns belongs to me, but the cost of upkeep, repairs, and taxes somehow does.

I just have to say that rather than seeing anyone at AT as a hypocrite, the fact that you guys CHOOSE to live small says a lot more than if you HAD to. I think you are being true to your beliefs in deeper way than those who have no other choice. I love this site and its philosphy, and I think you're doing a great job. I didn't see the nasty thread, and I'm glad. Keep up the good work!

I am not one to comment except in the most dire of cases (microsuede being a dire case in my mind :)) but have been a dedicated reader for a little more than a year. I love this site, I have derived much pleasure and value out of it. I see no need for Maxwell to defend himself.

The oprah posts that I saw, and I think I saw most, were fairly civil. They did bring up questions about the use of rent controlled apartments by the non poor (though not wealthy) that seemed fair to someone who knows nothing about rent control.

Personally, I could care less as I don't live in NYC, and such questions hardly devalue the site in my eyes. But they weren't entirely unreasonable.

Both sides represented, it is the diplomat's daugher in me!

maxwell, you don't have to apologize or explain anything. i never felt you were misrepresenting your life or lifestyle. i certainly envy it, but i don't begrudge you it. (although i would it mucho if you guys could offer more budget design suggestions for us starving artists.)

i for one like small spaces. i find them beautiful. i live in a small space by choice, although i could afford more square footage. it keeps my life simple and my material/ecological footprint small, and that's more beautiful than any sofa.

i like this site. i'm sorry people who don't like this site continue to visit it and then get nasty when the site doesn't please them. if they post their addresses i will send them some pampers.

peace.

I'm sorry, coco, I missed that. Could you please post it again?

My comments on the Oprah thread and the comments i've made here, to me, are certainly not just "hating" or cat fighting etc. they are much more important than that to me. i wouldnt spend time commenting extensively if i was just causing trouble.

the issues that were raised on the oprah thread by me and ALL the others (both sides) are extremely important.

Obviously i use this site, visit it wuite often etc. I'm not "hating" on people. I and others raised several issues ont he oprah thread that were completely valid and appropriate, and were met with obstinance and idiocy instead of an open conversation, therefore leading to hostility (on both sides, agreed). the prime example of this can be seen on this thread, when someone raises a completely valid issue, albeit in the minority, and is met with moronic childness instead of genuine interest or response.

i never posted anything regarding this subject except where this WAS the subject (regardless of whoever else did) - that would be two threads - the Oprah thread, and now this one - both of which are/were the appropriate place to post my comments regarding that/this particular topic.

the hostility on these two threads, and other basic design related threads TRULY usually does begin with a few regular people who have something smart and sassy to say that doesnt really matter or have any real criticism or value.

On the one hand, living small is giving back to the Earth by not taking up more space than you really should. On the other hand, I really wish I had 3 houses in the Hamptons where girls could give me sponge baths.

My 2 cents. I found the Oprah-train wreck posts an interesting read. Would I want it every day? No.

When is that smallest apartment contest starting? That's why I came back to the site a couple of days ago.

Tony G.

umm, I fixed the "guinea" pig spelling.

p2, i completely understand but perhaps if we don't agree with someone we should just leave it at that. instead of "wtf"ing right off the bat and figuratively stomping our feet on the ground... it only adds fuel to the fire. "design dabbler" is allowed to his/her own opinion just as much as anyone else - even if we may disagree with it. as i read i, he/she wasn't personally attacking anyone

HA! Good one Oliver. I think this thread seems to have the beginnings of another train-wreck....can't we all just agree to disagree? by being negative we only invite more negativity in our lives.

FYI - a difference of opinion does not equate negativity.

You continue to be a class act, Maxwell. I hope one day to be able to call you a friend.
~Monica

Stephen,

Simply disagreeing with you (or Design Dabbler) doesn't make one a hostile poster. Perhaps you are being a bit oversensitive to imagined slights.

heather--

There is context and history to my response to him, so it was not "right off the bat."

And where were you yessterday, policing the civility of responses? We could have used your even keel then, for sure.

Lemon,

I'm mainly referring to the Oprah posts, however, as more than one person has already said on here, Patrick threw out what was percieved to be a hostile comment for no reason, unprovoked.

I think this was a very gracious reply. I also have to say that Maxwell has mentioned the Hampton home numerous times. If people missed it--well, that's not Maxwell's fault.

That said, I couldn't care less if Maxwell was filthy rich or if his parents are filthy rich. This site has been invaluable to me as I have renovated my own small space in NYC. I appreciate this site and the owner/community guidance very much. If that means I "drank the Kool-Aid," so be it.

Maxwell has said numerous times that the site is about carefully considered purchases, not about living the life of a monk and giving up all possessions. It is also true that there are people who choose to live in smaller spaces. If you offered me a 5,000 square foot McMansion, I might snap it up and sell it, but I wouldn't want to live there.

Patrick,

"And where were you yessterday, policing the civility of responses? We could have used your even keel then, for sure."

i think this is exactly what i/people are talking about... instead of stopping with your first sentence, you just had to throw in the little stupid jibe.

...and why has no one touched onthe fact that it was OPRAH for Pete's sake. She's not exactly known for her minimalist tendencies.

I started reading AT when I knew I would be moving into what I thought was a small place. Sure, it's a studio, by virtue of having no interior walls except for the bathroom, but it's 16' X 30' - a veritable expanse in comparison to the places I often see here.

I've got the book, and I plan to use it (stand back!) and I love the ideas I see and the links I find. Let those that think they know better go ahead and to their own blog.

Man, I can't believe that thread turned into a flame fest! If people have probs with Maxwell et all, then gtfo, noone is forcing you to visit the site.

GET WELL SOON MAX!

patrick, sorry i'm not on here all day, every day. just read this post this afternoon and found it curious that so much anger still remained from something that happened yesterday.
let's all take a deep breath and try to let go!

Stephen--

Wow, super-duper endurance. I loooooovvvee that in a man. Someone's been taking his blogger Cialis.

But, hmmm, when you (or someone you agree with) have(has) a negative opinion, it's all about the art of the debate, civil conversation, freedom of speech and important issues.

When I express anything *remotely* negative or annoyed, it's "stupid jibes".

Interesting standard.

Now, where exactly did calling me "patty" or using the word "stupid" in your response to me fall exactly... free speech or artful debate?

Stephen,
Sorry -- I misinterpreted your post. There must be some sort of rule that every public interweb forum must eventually devolve into chaotic fighting. Just the other day, my sister was viciously attacked and called all kinds of vulgar and crazy things on a message board for -- of all things -- children's figure skating. Something about anonymity combined with lack of tone...

Well, I did my AT detox for a while and then curiosity got the better of me. There has been an interesting response.

Some people, like me, in the Oprah Thread had less of an issue with the country house and more of an issue with the rent control aspect. To me it was a question of fundamental honesty. Hearing the claim of "holding on" to the small NYC apartment despite having other space was kind of like hearing someone brag about cheating on their taxes. It was also disheartening to see people bending over backwards to justify the site owners. Taking advantage of the system in this way just smells bad to me.

uhm...Stephen...I don't believe I necessarily said that a difference of opinion was negative - I believe I said "agree to disagree" which, and correct me if I'm wrong, is not dissuading or condemning the difference of opinion but harping on the subject all day long is argument simply for the sake of arguing, and that, my friend, is where it can be taken negatively. i did not specifically say anyone was being negative - it was just a meager attempt at trying to come to some sort of a resolution here. everyone is expending so much energy on such an unimportant issue - or it should be taken as such - as someone's material possesions. it seems (actually is obvious) that this world is now just a menial display of bought objects by which people measure themselves against eachother rather than companionship and compassion for the fellow man. this is where i leave this thread and everyone can continue arguing about having oposing beliefs.

bitter queen

Negative posting makes baby Jesus/Oprah cry. WWOD?

Heather (and Olivia, too),

If you missed much of the hostility, that's good. I checked in late last night, and was quite flummoxed and horrified to see the pictures posted (no matter how hard people try to justify them) and the address. Not to mention, the posts making fun of Ursula and her name.

Yeah, it wasn't pretty. There were some interesting points made in the thread, but not by the people throwing out stuff like that.

Stephen--

Ah, your debate skills are ever so sharp today!

patrick,

you're wearing me down. i cant keep up. gotta go put my face on.

The fact that you have the means to live bigger makes it even cooler to me that you guys live small. I don't think that having a weekend place deters from that. Heck, I rent a storage locker, does that make me untrue to my (relatively) small space? I watched (only your bit) of Oprah and I thought it was inspiring.

As for people who think it's unfair or "dangerous" to romanticise small living, that's ridiculous. Sure, many people live small because they have to - I know I do. But isn't that all the more reason to celebrate ways to make it beautiful?

Thank you for sharing your home. I didn't see the other thread, but you should not have to put up with that sort of stuff. If people don't like the site or it's philosophy, move on.

I'm sorry - I really was leaving - but are you really resulting to name calling?

Thoreau

-Bobby

Stephen--

Yeah, calling people "bitter queen" is really tiring, isn't it?

Someone just ip block that guy already >_<

well this is it, you've got your wish, i'm outta here.

interestingly enough, i'm heading to my cottage upstate...

have a great weekend everyone. especially you patrick. you're cute when you're all red and mad.

Stephen:

"bitter queen" ?? I do not know P2, except for his regular witty posts on this site. And I do not know the Gillingham-Ryans personally. However, I feel compelled to say that whatever your feelings on the G-Rs, their financial and/or property ownership status, we have now learned enough about you to determine that you are irrational, exceptionally rude, bigoted, intolerant and tactless. And I would prefer a part-time small-apartment dweller, part time Hamptonite, all the time class act over that anyday.

er... make that "its philosophy..." sorry, typo.

You should see me when I'm BIG and RED.

just thought i'd check back and see what's happened. good-looks like it's turned in on itself and is burning out. phew!

Obviously if only you didn't have the audacity to have a well-off family (really, how dare you?? in fact, how dare you have any personal background/life at all??) then all the rest of us would have lower rent to pay.

The internet is such a bizarre place. Sorry you've been getting such negative feedback. I couldn't care less if you owned three neighborhoods and a hair salon in the Hamptons, it wouldn't make it any less fun/useful to visit this website (and I don't think it's any of my business to begin with).

Maybe this site is not the place for it, but the snarkiness, unease and tension surrounding the question of wealth and resources available to devotees and founders of AT alike signals to me a desire for a more complex and sustained discussion of class in this country (and beyond). In particular, the way consumption (and the choice to refrain from consuming) can mask people's true relation to production (i.e. their class position--do you sell your labor for a living? Do you own the means of production? Do your parents?). This is not deception on anyone's indiviudal part, but one of the main characteristics of psot-industrial capitalism. The betrayal possibly felt is just the rude awakening that consumption is ultimately an illusion of some sort.

I LOVE this site and have the book and am grateful everyday for it. I also appreciate the trickier, pricklier comments that push the premises of our exchanges. However, I did not read or see what sounds like super mean stuff posted on the oprah thread.

The other thing getting lost here is that even if they DO split their time between two homes (and even that does not seem accurate), the COMBINED square footage of the places they live in is STILL less than what most peopel consider "small".

I've been reading AT for forever, even though I never comment. I don't really have much to say about the debate here (except that maybe everyone's taking this all a bit too seriously), but I wanted to say that Design Dabbler/xyz's satire on AT in Open Thread 375 was totally hilarious. And so right on. I love AT, but I think we should be able to laugh at ourselves AND have a little debate now and then without getting so... angry. Here's the link to the thread for everyone who needs a laugh:
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/open-threads/open-thread-375-018252

Also, the Oprah thread is back up, for everyone who has no idea what everyone else is talking about:
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/news/at-is-on-oprah-now-018277

I love you guys.

Folks who criticize "hypocrisy" are inadvertently sending the message that people who CAN live large, SHOULD live large, or else be seen as fakers. I live in a small apartment but have the luxury of Prospect Park as an escape. Am I a hypocrite because I have the fortune and wealth to live in New York City and not Calcutta?

I admire keeping to a "small is good" ethos even more in those who aren't simply forced to by circumstance.

I didn't read the other Oprah thread, but really?!, it was about rent control and a family house in the Hamptons?
As the holder of a 400 sq ft rent-stabalized apartment in New York, and the mother of a five month old, who has very recently been looking into what else I could get, the options are not good.

Perhaps the people acusing M & SK of taking advantage of the system don't get the history of rent control, (it was created, not for the poor, but for the middle class), or perhaps they don't get the very large leap they would have to make to stay in the neighborhood they live in in the same amount of space!!! $2000/ month is a reasonable rent jump, just to maintain in a 275 sq ft,one bedroom, not stabalized, apartment. That's a jump of $24,000/year, and a two bedroom, even more.

This is a beautiful site, with a great community, and I have to say, M & SK's willingness to share their 9 month cure and Ursala, helped me and encouraged me as I struggled to come to terms with my small space and my baby.

While I don't like eveyone's tone, I admit I appreciate both side's POV.

I live small but with only one apartment and no escape hatch, I do feel like I have to face certain issues that people with a second (or third or fourth) home do not. These are the issues I struggle with most. I would LOVE to live light and leave 10% of my space empty. At the same time, I don't want to get rid of my wedding dress, or the dress I wore when I was 9 to my mother's funeral. I want to store Christmas decorations, more than one winter coat, my son's artwork. I've had to sell furniture that my parent's owned and that I loved and it broke my heart to do it. My husband's closet houses paintings his mother made but we don't have room to hang. I worry that my kid will never own a bike because I don't have room for it. But do I want to spend $200+ a month, month after month, for a storage place?
These are the issues I really have a hard time with.

I did somehow miss that the G-R's had the houses in the Springs. I could care less about the location but - oh - how I'd love the space! But that space does allow them to perhaps live more lightly in the city than they would otherwise. On the other hand, it's really no business of mine. This is their site and I've been helped by the community more than once.

Anyway, it's probably not worth getting all nuts about. I like to live lightly emotionally as well as physically. That is the real secret in my opinion.

It's too bad we're getting trolls here (like stephen), but I suppose it's to be expected as a part of the site (and community) going through it's growing pains.

I'm sure it'll work it's way out, and at least we have a little moderation to help! :)

M, S-K and O:

I agree with the posters late in this thread who are urging us all not to get too worked up, but there are two additional points I'd like to make:

1) You're running a business. I see no reason why you should be ashamed of it or present it as something self-sacrificial. As I said in my earlier post, what you're doing is useful (even if I don't agree with the overall philosophy). You're also making a living, and there's no reason to portray it in any other way. Several of the comments today have thanked you for running the site -- as if it were some sort of charity for the design-challenged. The site, the entire AT-package, is how you make your living. Embrace it. Otherwise, when you do become the next big thing, and independently wealthy, you'll have to produce for your disappointed fans excuses for your success.

The general atmosphere of "the G-Rs are above petty commercial success" that sometimes hovers over this site is what, I believe, a lot of people find off-putting.

2) Consider the tone that you want your site to have. Do you want one that encourages an open exchange of ideas and vigorous debate? What has struck me today is how close to the truth my parody (under the assumed name xyz) comes. It's a bit like parodying Dick Cheney or Bill O'Reilly. How can you do a better job than they do themselves? You've collected around you, I'm afraid, the beginnings of a cult. It must be hard, I realize, to reject all that adulation, but your long-term interests lie beyond the hard-core believers. There's no way you'll be able to expand the appeal of AT without broadening your base. You'll need to find a way to accommodate dissenters and doubters, along with true believers. If you look at the discussion today with an honest eye, you'll see how those who disagree have been branded "the haters" and how they are constantly being urged to go away. It's not in your interest to have that happen.

I agree that civility is important. But I am not in favor of blocking people. I wasn't in the case of Jonathan in the past, and I am not in the case of somebody like P2 now -- even though he greets my every post with comments that are distinctly uncivil (when he talked today, on another thread, of my "miserable disposition" I had the distinct impression he was not complimenting me). Let him stay, I urge you. Your daughter will need bibs for some time to come.

Wow, my cable cord was knocked out of place so my VCR didn't tape the Oprah show. Then I've been on insane deadlines so I hadn't checked the blog. I'm actually glad I missed the Wild Wild West of the Oprah thread.

I only started reading the blog last fall and totally picked up the fact that there was some kind of Hamptons space. The pics of the home also suggested it was humble.

I really appreciate the message, inspiration and community of AT. It's really helping me honor "homemaking" and creating a sanctuary for my husband, poodle and me.

What an exercise in futility. Don't you all realize how worthless it is trying to convince the other side you're right? I'm always amazed by how heated and excited people get, and for what? Nothing comes out of it, you go on feeling your way and the other feels the opposite. Just go on and do something productive.
As for the whole GR thing, isn't the only real valid question, is it illegal for them to live in their current small apartment or is it legal? I mean the rest is all opinion, you have your right to share it, and that's what makes it good and the GRs bank on you sharing it to make their site successful, but hasn't every angle been covered? Why do you keep repeating? Are you contributing anything anymore?

Oops didn't mean to post twice. That was weird.

I just want to clarify that although I have, in the past, posted on the topic of the genuineness of various statements in light of access to a second home, I did not post this past week - the "A" of the Oprah posts was someone else. IIRC, I last posted, in response to SKGR's invitation, about the kitchen installation (and how the uneven wall was fixed). Just so you regulars know . . .

I personally bear these people no ill will, and just want better transparency on the product recommendations.

A

I neither saw the Oprah show nor read the Oprah thread. But from context I'm getting a sense of what went on.

The idea that anyone should have to apologize for promoting small space living because he/she has another space to go to on weekends and holidays is so breathtakingly stupid as to be offensive.

Maxwell has NEVER hidden the fact that he has a weekend place. There have been numerous posts about things he's done there to make it gorgeous. The How To: post about painting your floors and not screwing it up is the one I remember.

And why SHOULD he have hidden it? Is his rare sensibility for making the most of a small space -- and his obvious commitment to green, responsible, beautiful living -- suddenly of less interest because we find out his family has some resources? For that matter, since when is frugality only for the resource-poor? I live in NYC and I know many people who are astoundingly, mind-bogglingly rich. Not all of them choose to live like Croesus.

In my eyes, this "debate" has betrayed very little about Maxwell that he hadn't already told his readers about himself. What it has mostly done is reveal many readers' astounding capacity to miss one of AT's most steadfast convictions: that riches in fact have very little to do with money.

lol Who cares what Oprah has to say... she has a budget plan, diets and things she advocate and promotes... did she fix her weight problem??? Does she need to be on a budget?

I love this site. I hate getting sucked into the internet because I start feelling guilty about everything I could do that needs doing....Dog walking, Laundry, re-upholstery projects, ext. However, I am addicted and check it at least once a day if not more. There is a wealth of information here that could be utilized by almost anyone regardless of social standing, or apartment size. I WANT TO WORK FOR MAXWELL!!!!! I THINK THIS SITE IS GENIUS. I could photograph interiors for the house tours. That is my dream job. A magazine is a great idea..... I could be an intern. Think about it.

I'm a "lurker" here too, I never post, I never even read the comments really. But I love the site, and even the snark (and arguing about arguing) have added another element of entertainment for me. Keep up the good work, all of you! I got a great giggle from the open thread 375 as well.

OH ERINOREA you beat me to asking for a job! noooooooo! :-)

I think the argument that it's maxwell's site so he can do whatever he wants is stupid. Yes, it's empirically true, but it misses that the point of the site (and particularly the commenting system) is the community it serves. Deleting discussions is not in the interest of the community, especially if you then go on to talk about them... at least let me SEE what you're responding to. Close a thread to new comments if it's gotten really acrimonious, but to just hide the whole thing, then have your say is really the wrong way to deal with a community that has reached a size that will necessarily include fans as well as polite dissenters and even outright trolls. That's just part of what AT has become and deleting entire threads is not respectful of the majority of the community.

I think there's too little acceptance of dissent amongst some ATers and too much "troll feeding". If a comment is seriously snarky to no purpose, just don't respond. If you respond, you invite turning the whole conversation into that.

On the topic of how people live vs. what philosophy they promote: If you're going to use yourself as an example in this context, I think it's important not to misrepresent how you live if you want your opinions to be respected. Maxwell has been open about his dwellings (not just now, the weekend place was mentioned before as others have pointed out). Whether or not he has the same challenges as someone else who lives in 250sq.ft. is beside the point. We all are individuals and are going to have different resources and different problems to address. In my opinion, the point of the AT community is to help one another live comfortably in the spaces we have, regardless of their size and our means.

I think it's a mistake to fetishize living in small spaces, whatever "small" means to you.
Living Small or Simple has its pros and cons just like any other choice we make about our lifestyles. Whether it's all you can afford, or you prefer it that way, it doesn't define your quality as a person any more than the brand of shoes you wear.

On the topic of the contradictions of the site: We all have to buy things occasionally, it's part of the way we live. AT isn't suggesting you buy every product they showcase or anything, so get over it. It's a resource to help you learn about useful/beautiful items. We also all have to get rid of things on occasion, this site is also about that. Life is full of contradictions; it doesn't mean they aren't compatible to be discussed in the same forum.

Also: I think that a properly threaded comment system would be both more useful and also helpful in reducing the effect of trolls. Please look into upgrading to some software that handles threading nicely.

Saying that it's "breathtakingly stupid" is as offensive as some of stephen's comments.

The "how to paint the floors" is mentioned again and again as the one example of the other homes. If there were more, I don't know about them. While I'm not saying he's hidden the fact but I don't think there have been "numerous posts". Show me the links

And is have 4 homes really "green living"?

There was also a post about the dining room chairs.

Your family owning and part-time renting 3 properties is substantially different from "owning 4 homes".

plenty of people choose to live small regardless of their bank accounts & family. i know more than a few men who live in a condo who are each worth several million a piece.

good for you! :)

Wowie-kazowie! I’ve been away so long and I tune in to see how the Oprah event went and look at this insanity! While I understand the debate at hand (fame brings drama, yo), it seems like people are putting the emphasis on the wrong syLLAble as my mother used to say.

Now, I used to work for Maxwell, and while we may not have agreed on everything (I loved to stir up the drama in threads- him not so much), this idea that he is somehow manipulating the public with his story is insane. Perhaps if Maxwell had more than the 5 minutes on OPRAH he could have mentioned his blog (about small spaces) his mission (to help people make the most of small spaces) and even his weekend getaway (to get the hell out of small spaces). Omitting these things maybe made Maxwell and family seem hypocritical as if he was bragging about how he lived when in reality he has choice and options. However, it seems clear to me that any of this information would have lessened OPRAH’s story idea, which was that her cutie pie “discovery” Nate is THE BEST and has TERRIFIC and UNIQUE ideas about small spaces. Saying that the G-R’s don’t spend every waking minute in their apartment isn’t a good sound bite for the segment. Mentioning that Maxwell has a blog, book and lifestyle suggests that cutie pie Nate didn’t create the idea first. Not being first goes against what OPRAH is about.

I’m not an Oprah hater- deal with it. But Oprah is all about being first and “discovering” things. (I promise you plenty were downloading The Secret long before Oprah started kvelling last week).

These thread debates were always my favorite part. Yes, a few bad apples can spoil the fun (from BOTH sides). There is nothing wrong with a few points of view especially on things as subjective as design, taste and lifestyle choices. That’s it. I’ve said my peace.

That was fun!

xoxo

Oh Maxwell & AT,

I don't know how you tolerate all the mean, psycho posters. I would've punched their lights out (i.e., deleted and banned them) for highjacking my blog as one or two people have done here. You don't have to explain anything. Let them get their own blog.

Best,
Jackie

Hey Maxwell!

Mostly a lurker here - a small space advocate in downtown Vancouver Canada - and until the Oprah show I didn't really know your personal living space situation, so it's not like it has a huge impact on your suitability as a design guru. I've got your book, enjoyed watching you on Mission Organization, and find the AT site a great repository for small space ideas.

After the Oprah show, though, I find the weekend getaway house reality just a little disappointing because it seems to conflict with the "350 square feet 365 days a year" image you presented on the show. Then again, I've worked in broadcast and newspapers and have yet to find a story told 100% right - essence can easily get lost in the telling and the production, and it's easy to let the wrong words slip out.

Regardless, great site, great book and you have a fan in Canada's West.

Allison--
Did you miss the part where that thread is back up in all its original glory?

Are they doing anything illegal? Because if not, this discussion should end. END. E-N-D. It's over, what more can you possibly say that is not just futile?

G-B: I seem to have missed a whole lot of nastiness. I have found your book a good motivator toward a simpler and more manageable home. Your site and your regular readers have been helpful to me several times. Your links have been a terrific resource, since there is a dearth of style where I reside. As a longtime reader, the cottage in Hampton ( I feel I'm missing some clues on the importance of Hampton) was not a surprise: I seem to remember it as a place for experiments in colors between renters. Your message seems clear: simplicity and beauty are one.

I didn't read the Oprah thread--and probably won't even if it's back up--nor did I see the show. In fact, I've never seen the Oprah show, which probably makes me part of a tiny minority in this country.

But I do know that I found AT at a time that I needed it. I don't really love "small," but I had to embrace tiny living about two years ago. My husband died suddenly--at a young age--and I knew that sooner or later I'd have to give up my 5-bedroom house in the northern suburbs of New York. The sooner/later turned out to be 9 months, and I decided to return to where I grew up--Manhattan. But all I could do was a 1-bedroom apartment, and to say I downsized is the understatement of all time. AT has been invaluable to me as a source of ideas to make my incredibly shrinking space livable. I check in every day, and I'm rewarded every day.

Maxwell: I owe you this url from the multi-site Xmas party. It's lokifurniture.com. The owner/artist is Jamie. He makes steel windowsills (for those of us with grotty, unredeemable sills) and many other things.

Neal: Please look at dalsouple.com. Fabulous colors for rubber flooring. Not local, but all you'll find here is the traditional "dingy" rubber flooring look.

Po