apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

I made the Clementine candle yesterday. Lovely.

Perhaps this will resonate with you as it did with me just now:

In an interview with the Daily Telegraph, the Dalai Lama said the "West's big problem is that people have become too self-absorbed. "

"In the West," he said, "you have bigger homes, yet smaller families; you have endless conveniences -- yet you never seem to have any time. You can travel anywhere in the world, yet you don't bother to cross the road to meet your neighbours...I don't think people have become more selfish, but their lives have become easier and that has spoilt them.

They have less resilience, they expect more, they constantly compare themselves to others and they have too much choice -- which brings no real freedom."

And a good week to all....

Sure, Anne1, Mongolian nomads live the most enviable, free and neoghbor-loving life.

Tat, I actually think that Anne's post (and the Dali's quote) has some truth to it. However, and I know I'm biased here living in NYC, but I really think that this holds much more true as you move out of the urban/city environments and into the 'burbs... and also intensifies as you move West across the United States.

The Dali Lama is on to something. I have been telling anyone who would listen for years now that the West is in rapid, horrible decline by almost every metric imaginable. As each day passes, the more convinced I am of our demise. And I am equally pessimistic about the rising powers who will take our place. They are horrible too, albeit in different ways.

Although I love this site, its fetishistic narcissism is only more indicator that we have lost our way. It's horribly depressing.

The contractor says that heat from my fireplace will "warp" the plasma so the tv is being relegated to the side. The wife wins the battle.

Anne,
Thanks for that...I have been thinking something like that recently, pondering the ridiculousness and misplaced priorities in my life. Wooahhh...deep. :) Okay, on to doing a bunch of mostly meaningless work....

Um, Tat, I think you're missing the point. It's *actually* not about who has the more enviable life.

I tried on Friday night to beat the deadline and vote on all the entries on the LA site in the smallest, coolest contest, since I only was keeping up my voting on the NY site entries, but I could not keep my eyes open and literally was falling asleep at my laptop, so oh well...

So this past weekend I did help make my New Jersey friend's bedroom look nicer by helping him replace the mirror above his dresser and by painting the "oak" laminate dresser and highboy to look like that espresso-colored wenge stuff that's popular at the moment. It's the top left set in the flickr thing that pops up when you click my name. It was my kind of fun way to spend a weekend.

Wow Curtis - that's an amazing transformation. Great job. You're a good friend.

Went home early from work on Friday to nurse a cold and there in my mailbox was my new copy of Apartment Therapy. I passed many pleasureable hours over the weekend reading AT, looking around my apartment, trying on many of the suggestions. I like that Maxwell's instructions are unqualified and expressed with conviction. He writes with authority and common sense. I was happy to learn that I already practice much of what he advises (I cook most nights and make my bed in the morning, for example) but there are things I can do to make life at home better (though I will not get rid of my TV). It all seems manageable. Thanks for a great book.

Melissa, but isn't the life with most freedom the most enviable?

Let's all discard our earthly posessions, turn an updated luddite reincarnation of hippies and move, beloved mid-century chair an/or Eames original sketch found in the garbage pile in tow, to rural village in Himalayas: oh, delightful odor of burning horse poopoo (organic, sustainable fuel!). Have any of you actually tried to live this ideal? I have.

There is NO noble poverty. There is NO noble savant. Nada. Doesn't exist. Or why do you think all those Chinese peasants try to emigrate here, to corrupted Western civilization, and not the other way?

I wish you would be with me yesterday at International Asian Fair at the Armory (link @ my name), and see for yourself, how posession-free, non-violent and unselfish all those sage civilizations of the East really are.(Great show, everyone, highly recommended - it's still on, come and see)

What a pile of horseshit. Literally.

Thanks, NT. It really was fun. I love doing that kind of stuff with other people's paint money.

Jonthan, what about using one of those pop-up/pivot tv stands to the right. Click my name for an example. Granted, those are $5k, but you can buy the mechanism and have a cabinetshop easily do whatever you want.

went to abc carpet in the bronx this weekend. the furniture/lighting prices were ludicrous, even cracked and broken furniture was priced at thousands of dollars. however, the linen sale was pretty good, nice colors and patterns, some great deals.

as for the dalai lama and his quote, i'd rather live in a society in which people have the option of making dumb choices than in a feudal theocracy run by monks.

Jonathan, don't give up yet!

I have said before that a plasma over the fireplace is not ideal but, having seen your photos, that is really the best place for it. Many ppl have done this so, unless your contractor or someone else did a really crappy job on the venting of that fireplace, you will not get a warped plasma.

Take a look through this gallery of other ppls plasma installations if you want other ideas though
http://gallery.avsforum.com/showgallery.php/cat/502

I will try and find an old post with pictures from that site to show a properly vented plasma installation above the fireplace that allowed for proper airflow to avoid the dreaded contractor says so warped plasma.

I'm so sad to see an end to the smallest coolest contest. But like an addict, I was checking for updates 20 times a day so maybe I'll be a little more productive at work now. Maybe.
And it has inspired me to attempt to fill my half empty home. Has anyone ever ordered from europebynet.com? I've been eyeing the rotor coffee table on dwr for a year now and noticed europebynet has it for about $400 less (and no tax!). It says it's by Bellato (same as dwr). Am I naive to think it's identical??

"'In the West,' he said, 'you have bigger homes, yet smaller families'"

the implication being, of course, that a larger family is somehow more salubrious. and seeing what damage families do to their members - not just in the west - i'm loathe to take this little bit of romance (cuz it's no more than that) as an indicator of what is a "good" life, and what is "not."

this is why i love this site. the dalaai lama and philosopy juxaposed to curtis' delicate transformations. i'm pro dali and curtis by the way. but i'd rather have curtis as a friend and read the dali lama on occasion.

there is a balance between living like a hippy and living a compeletely materialistic life. there is a difference between being so obsessed with money and spending it and recognising that money is a means to an end and your main focus should be on leading a happy and healthy life.

but it is not necessarily a conflict between east and west. having grown up in mumbai i can say that the society works a bit different there and there are different values. in the western society privacy is a big thing more than in an eastern society.

but a person in mumbai can be as materialistic as a person in london. there is a great clamour for buying more and wanting more.

I recognise it in myself as well. While what the Dalai lama says is simplistic,there is some innate wisdom in what he says.

curtis, did you use a stain or was it a paint job on the furniture. i have a rustic looking pine bed and some white painted bedside table made of MDF (i think). i want to try and unify them with a single paint or stain. any advice

sorry- dalai.

To all those who were discussing cat litterbox issues the other day: CLick on my name for a link to a Design Sponge entry about a GENIUS litterbox solution! How come I did't think of this - it's absolutely brilliant!!!

Anne, thanks - that's a nice thought to start the day with - I know that we have a huge "neighbor/stranger" problem where we live - I've been in the yard working, and the neighbor to my left has been on their side of the fence, and not even said hello - even in response to my greeting. Feh.

Thanks Jamie Pup -never heard from u so wasn't sure if you saw pics. Any other advice???? would love to hear it

pphillipp- (great paint chips btw... fuckin' love them)

i think you're correct to take issue with the "smaller families" comment-

however, for me, what struck most true was the "not interacting w/ neighbors" piece. especially with people having more and more space to themselves, with technology pushing us apart, and car-cultures keeping us from ever interacting w/ people we don't immediately know, this part does actually bother me a whole lot.

-Kellen-

Curtis, look at Aponwao Frames collection (link at my name), you might find this interesting. (I think it's brilliant)

Since I have already calculated the necessary "urine arc" from my balcony to the dining area of the outside restaurant over the of the fence of my townhouse backyard, i SUPPOSE i am guilty of the 'not loving thy neighbor' allegation.

Laura, do a search for europebynet.com
I have recommdended them and given details on a number of occassions here.
Shipping and customs may or may not be included in that price (I detailed those in one of my posts) you see but an email to them will clear that up.

All items for sale are the real deal. No knock offs or "reproductions".

J - sorry I should have replied. Will respond later in the day.

re--Interacting with neighbors

I just think the rules and options are changing.
Um, while I couldn't pick some of my two-doors-away "actual" neighbors out of a line-up, I spend a great deal of time on AT with some of my "virtual neighbors." I think that counts. Sure, it's not our parents' definition, but I still consider my life richer for it. And isn't that the point?

I think it's changing in the same the way the definition of family is changing (at least for me). As a single gay man from a rather small family, I define "family" in a broader way. My best friend Vinnie is family. My ex Mike is family. My best girlfriend Lisa (with whom I only keep in touch via email) is family. So, while I'll never have kids (and will *never* agree that fulfillment or contribution comes only via procreation), I have a very large family, for which I am eternally grateful.

I meant do a search in the AT site.

Jonathan, btw- thought of you yesterday at the show (how's the water today?) - there was a booth from New Zealand, wonderful rare art/design books on all things Asian. And I saw a fantastic "Urban Japanese gardens" book, only $30 and arm-thick, with pics and detailed "how-to"...

obi - thanks!

gharana - his set was laminate that was made to look like oak. So after I sanded them (would have preferred to have had my electric palm sander with me), I painted them with a paint made by Kilz, which considered itself to be a one-coat product, and then after the darker "Black Ink" color, I sort of dry-brushed some "Bison" which was a dark brown over it, basically in the longest strokes possible. In some areas, I was basically just lightly grazing the previous brushstokes with the second color, which kind of helped with sort of a grain. The black and brown was both very close in color. I wasn't really trying to do a very dramatic grain thing at all. It was mainly about going dark.

For your project, I you COULD use stain, but I think that paint would reconcile the wood and the MDF a little bit better. Or... if you at least did an undercoat of a couple of pine colors with a graining tool to create faux wood on the real wood AND on the MDF, THEN... you COULD just use a stain over them both, and they might match pretty well. But then you're talkin' about at least a 3-step process. And that's only if you use a tinted primer for that bottom coat! Because it you used a regular primer you're talkin' about 4 different layers. That might be more trouble than you're willing to put out on it.

Tat, I think you are reading too much into the comments. He's not advocating poverty or even necessarily the "Eastern way" (we don't really get any context) but just saying that the West is very materialistic. Does anyone seriously think that American society isn't? Don't we all complain about how busy we are all the time? (I know at my old job, it was like a contest to see who could claim to be the most crazed with business.)

I just read this as along the lines of Maxwell's book, which I haven't yet purchased (but will, I promise!) From what I gather, he advocates simplifying and connecting--and that seems to be what Anne's post was about, too.

I think we are proving the point of that quote by treating it like it's a competition between cultures, and discussing who has it better. Every culture has desirable traits and undesirable traits, so no one would win.

And Patrick, I think you make a great point. I do think that a traditional sense of community is missing within our modern world--but since people *need* that, we are creating alternatives.

It's interesting.

(And I meant "busyness"--is that even a word?--not "business" above)

Hey - I didn't say it would would resonate with *everyone*. ;)

I'm working on a personal cure, of sorts. I want to be more aware, more grateful. More open. Mindful. Much less needy and wanty. Less attracted to shiny things.

And Jonathan, I must admit you're growing on me. You are quite the study in contrasts. And fetishistic narcissism.

Oh - and just because I haven't posted anything on this in a long time: the Adopt-a-Bertoia Project is stalled. The Bertoias are still earmarked for me but the new chairs haven't arrived, for anyone who was following the story of my Giant Bertoia Score. (Click links/saga below if you're curious.) Apparently the fabric on the new chairs isn't fire-retardant enough and was recalled.

www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/011606/open-threads/open-thread-118-005852

www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/011706/open-threads/open-thread-120-005886

www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/012406/open-threads/open-thread-126-006027

www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/021506/open-threads/open-thread-142-006504

On a much more materialistic note--
I went to have three pieces framed this Saturday at my favorite framer Steven Amedee Custom Framing.

I've had these pieces unframed for quite some time, so I was looking forward to finally getting them done.

Steven and I had a great time working out the specifics, and he came up with some gorgeous solutions for each. (Most excited about a plexi-box presentation of my first colored photograph by Martin Schoeller).

I am SO excited to get these back. One piece I think will be the catalyst for a warm-weather makeover of my apartment. So fun!

And this demonstrated my framing mantra about developing a relationship with a framer... he knows me well enough now where the bulk of the time was not spent weeding through every possible stick of molding in the store... instead, we looked at the details that will make these great pieces even more incredible through their presentation.

Plus, there are FAR worse ways to spend an afternoon than with to the handsome/cute Steven...!

The weekend fun continued as I vacuumed the hell out of my apartment with a friend's borrowed Dyson, and shredded my "to shred" pile with the same friend's borrowed shredder.

Good times!

thanks curtis. i will investigate the paint option. not sure if i can achieve a professional look like yours, but it will be better than what it is now

Ah the Dalai Lama....I come from an Indian family, although I grew up in England. We had friends and family streaming into our house constantly. At times, this was a good thing, at other times just tiring. Some of these friends and family were great. Others just enjoyed gossiping about someone or other and would be the first to discuss other peoples problems with glee, including ours.

I used to live in a small studio apt in Manhattan (never knew my neighbors), then a larger loft style apt in Philadelphia (still didn't know my neighbors), now I live in a single family home about 30 minutes outside of Philadelphia. I now know my neighbors which is great, except when the kid next door is playing his drums at 1 am. We haven't been round to tell him to pipe down, but perhaps if we weren't on friendly terms with them we would have.

I'm waffling....happy Monday to all.

Culture clashes are lovely things, and really there is a little bit of snobbery in both directions. How about "there are many paths to enlightenment" or something like that?

I mean seriously... every hear the one about the guy who fell in a well and had so much time to think about his life, etc., that he had a religious conversion, so he started pushing other people into the well, because he wanted everyone to have a religious experience too?

People in the East and the West are both a little defensive about their ways of life. For instance, some people think of an iPod as a way of stream-lining their music collection and simplifying their life. Some think of it as just another gadget being pushed off onto an unsuspecting public by an evil-monopoly-in-progress.

I think it's just one more piece of technology that I'm just not ready to wrap my mind around and embrace just yet. I probably will though, about 5 minutes before it becomes absolutely obsolete.

Ironic to me that a culture embracing "less is more" had a show dedicated to selling stuff. :)

And the irony continues, with Jonathan bemoaning: "Although I love this site, its fetishistic narcissism is only more indicator that we have lost our way."

Considering the source, THAT made me LAUGH.

But p(too), Jonathan's big-screen TV is not a *fetish.* It's an item of religious veneration. Putting it over the fireplace is like putting a saint's thigh bone there.

The point is that EVERYONE, from whatever culture, is a slave to SOMETHING. We think we're "free" here, but we're not; we're slaves to our material possessions, our busy schedules, our plasma TVs and fetishistic narcissism (I think Jonathan gets the point more than anyone, hence his inability to find peace in even the mundane things, his attempt to escape by immersing himself in them.) Of COURSE you'd rather be a slave to your many "things" than to toil by the sweat of your brow. Of COURSE I prefer shutting my neighbors out-- I'm spoiled, too, I've been burned out by the cloying neediness of people in general. The East is no nobler; they just have fewer things to be enslaved by. (i.e., no Apartment Therapy addictions.)

Interesting that you raise this point in a forum more or less devoted to material possessions, Anne. Although I always respected the whole philosophy of "editing" one's possesions, I didn't think it had a spiritual side.

Kellen, Please. You actually think NYC is LESS materialistic than the west?

Tat, I'd like to hear more about your disillusioning experience in trying to live an ideal of poverty.
Gharana, how DO we find "balance"?

Maybe you can both help resolve the vague dissonance some of us out here are probably feeling. Is it possible to live in this world, experience its few beauties, and still live with some sort of ideals? It seems that giving up all your possessions is as much an attempt to escape as immersing yourself in them.

wende--
Ha! I feel compelled to type "ossuary."

But was laughing more at the "narcissistic" part of his little (latest) rant.

I'd NEVER fault anyone for a fetish. ;)

Fiona, I reread the quote above to see how I misinterpreted it - and nope, I didn't: he compares the West (his words) to those others with bigger families and smaller homes-where are these examples located, by symmetry? We can talk till next daybreak, giving opposite examples of peace-loving non-materialistic neighbors in 3rd world countries (ehm...South Africa? Chinese in Singapoure and HK? Turks and Armenians? etc,etc)- and remain unmoved by the other's beliefs.
But we're not going to literally stick a shiv into each other's throat because of that: and that's the sure sign of superiority of my [western] civilization; I am biased.

I think the "smaller families" comment by the Dalia Lama was not meant to be taken literally, as if he was recommended we all start popping out kids, but rather how disconnected and isolated Westerners are from our families. Sitting in our McMansions, stayng in touch by email. Sure, families are not always a hotbed of mental health and loving kindness, but there are some good things thta can come from staying connected to those we regard as family. I think the best healing comes from relationships - and this society can be very isolated.

I remember seeing a documentary about a small country in the Himalayas where they didn't even have a word for "poverty" in their vocabulary for eons -- until Western explorers came. The western viewpoint had influenced their society to such a degree that just twenty years later, they considered themselves poor and were begging in the streets. They had been content before.

Isn't one of the basic ideas of Apartment Therapy simplying your life? That doesn't mean we destitute ourselves or espouse garbage-picking as the nobler way to be. Personally, I am always seeking to become more satisfied with who I am - from within, and I am learning to surround myself with stuff that affirms that - it's tricky not to give in to the striving to attain lots o'crap in the hopes it will satisfy something that's missing. I think that's along the lines of what the Dalai Lama was saying.

Anna- don't ever 'please' me...

no, i think the east is just as materialistic as the west- probably even MORE SO. happy?

what I was refering to was the fact that people interact on a human level less and less (and YES, i think that happens more and more as you move west... and i'll admit that may be an unfounded bias- maybe not tho).

they live and shut themselves up in GIANT homes in the middle of nowhere. drive cars everywhere (especially to shopping malls), all the time so that they can keep to themselves in their own worlds and never interact w/, be close to, or be challenged by different people.

i wasn't commenting on our 'stuff.' i was commenting on people and if they ever interact and speak to each other.

-Kellen-

Anna, I didn't lived in poverty-ridden country on purpose;I was born there and spend first 30 years of my life - not by choice.

You're not seriously suggesting I will write my biography in the open thread of design site, are you? If that is not narcissistic,I don't know what would be?

Please, type "ossuary" as much as you like! It was good for me, too.

Kellen, have you ever lived in a West Coast suburb, or are you just hatin' on it? My parents live in one at the 90-mile periphery of the Bay Area. They know *all* about their neighbors -- neighbor kids are in and out of the house constantly -- and have been involved in community organizations for so long that they remember many of the "local leaders" as pre-adolescents. It's out in the 'burbs that people grow their own veggies and have other space-consuming hobbies that involve making things by hand, too. You really want to claim that urban New Yorkers are more in touch with their communities and the natural world?

Sure, there are neighborhoods where everyone commutes to the Bay Area from their 3,000-sq-ft McMansion -- but there's an economic crash every 15 years or so to clear those out and turn them back into real places.

Suburbia is not the city, but it's not-the-city in more complex ways than most people give it credit for.

anna you cannot find the perfect balance. all i am saying is that the dalai lama is a great man. he can exist on little and have a great spiritual life. But we can learn from him.

I feel that we all should attempt to lead a spiritual life. that means all sorts of things like being friendly with neighbours, focussing less on material things, being in tune with nature.

These things dont necessarily mean that we cannot have a big house and have material goods. What it means to me atleast is to have some introspection and question the worth of each item you hanker after.

To say "we're enslaved by our material posessions and isolated by physical distances we have to drive to our jobs" is like that 3 yo in a sandbox, who tripped over his toy track and prceeded to beating the indifferent plastic, crying "bad, bad track!" all the time.

There is hope he'll grow up, though.

gharana,
I agree - the Dalai Lama is a great man. I had the honor of seeing him speak at St. John the Divine here in NYC about ten or so years ago. It stayed with me for a long time. He is a very tolerant and compassionate man, and perhaps his comment taken out of context doesn't give a more comprehensive impression of who he is and what he stands for to those not familiar.

Tat, I'm not sure you if you are misinterpreting the Dalai Lama, but you are definitely misinterpreting what I said. But no matter.

Diane, I also assumed that it meant nuclear families vs. expanded families, but it's hard to know. Western families aren't necessarily that much smaller, but do tend to be more separated.

Wende-

you bring up valid points that need to be acknowledged about suburban life. I can agree with these because yes, I spent the first 21 years of my life in the 'burbs- and not on the East Coast- and I did not live an east coast life...far from it.

Actually, i grew up on the border of Illinois & Wisconsin. Land is plentiful, there essentially is no public transportation, and mcmansions and SUVs are abound.

Yes, there can be a strong sense of community in these places, but I have always been struck by their homogeneity and extreme whiteness and white privlege.

And, yes, there are GREAT space consuming hobbies that can be undertaken- my family was extremely driven by landscaping, gardening, and wood-working (still is to this day).

But, I still feel that this is unfortunately not the norm and individuals and families do not appreciate the advantages of suburban life... and, just as what happens on the coasts- people isolate themselves and continue to consume & buy more.

For me personally, cities seem to offer more opportunity for interaction, exchange of ideas, and growth-inspiring challenges.

-Kellen-

Fiona quoth: "I just read this as along the lines of Maxwell's book, which I haven't yet purchased (but will, I promise!) From what I gather, he advocates simplifying and connecting--and that seems to be what Anne's post was about, too."

He also requires walking to the market to buy gourmet food at 4 p.m. on Sunday afternoon and only allows an hour for the entire trip. Much as I adore this site and worship at Maxwell's feet for a lot of inspiration -- that's not "simplifying" unless you're a Sex & the City character.

That's upscale consumption, and it depends on living in a certain kind of neighborhood that has gourmet shops open and well-stocked on a Sunday afternoon -- also a form of upscale consumption. (I live in downtown San Francisco, and it's a 25-minute walk to the nearest significant source of gourmet provender -- which would be wilting and grim at 4:30 on Sunday. People who want snazzy food go to the farmer's market on Saturday morning.)

A lot of this site is about consuming more elegantly and selectively, not about resisting consumption. Obviously, I'm not against that or I wouldn't be here so much! But I'm not sure AT really qualifies as the flagship for a less materialistic lifestyle.

I think interaction is based on the personality of the inabitant, and not the locale of the habitation.

I have a friend who could make friends on an ice floe.

My sister moved into my condo in Miami, one which I had inhabited for the three years prior to her taking it over. On her second week there, she told me, "Doug and Patty are getting a divorce!" To which I replied, "Who are Doug and Patty?"

So to me it's not a city versus 'burbs issue at all, but rather how you grew up, how outgoing you are, etc.

I must really not be expressing myself well today!

Like I said, I haven't read the book (yet!) but what people seem to have quoted the most is cooking for yourself and getting rid of your TV. Obviously, not everyone is going to do everything in the book (just as I love to read Martha Stewart's stuff, yet am not nearly ambitious enough to actually attempt most of her multi-step projects) but your point about the gourmet stuff is valid.

And I'm not comparing Maxwell to the Dalai Lama! (Sorry, Maxwell, I like you and all, but...) I'm just saying that it's obvious that we as Westerners are going to consume, but (at least to me), it makes sense to consider those decisions, make wise choices, and be happy with our choices.

I personally try to question whether I really need or want what I buy, and a lot of times, I realize that I don't need or really want something. This is something that has developed only within the past few years. I think it has made me more content with what I do have. That's just my own experience, though.

Now I'm going to go try to actually work!

Patrick-

Yes, but i do think the burbs allows those who are not inherently connective, but have the potential to be, to remain relatively isolated & in the bubble- when an urban environment may propel them to connect out of necessity, especially with those who are different.

at the same time, to play devil's advocate to my own point, cities can also be lonely places to which many people feel that cannot relate, and they may become even more isolated and overwhelmed by the differences, overlap, and juxtaposition.

-Kellen-

Interesting little sub-point about how you're brought up. Patrick's very own SISTER interacted so very differently to that apartment and neighbors. They were (very likely) brought up in the same home, right? But each of their very own personal nature was that different.

I think in retrospect the suburbs will ultimately be viewed as a great social failure. The consequence of the suburbs has ultimately been one of frayed social fabric and polarized politics. Suburbs exist for a good reason: the urban decay that took place for 25 years. Cities were disgusting and unsafe, and those who could afford it left. Now the opposite is true: the wealthy stay in New York City and those who can't afford the $2 MM 2 Bedroom are forced to leave when they have kids. The reason for this flip flop is, simply, that city life has become safe and clean and the putrid NYC of 1970 is now the dynamic, vibrant NYC of 2006.

The people who paid the price for the alientation of the suburbs were the wives, whose daily grist consisted of driving the kids around and interacting through the social prism of kids, schools, bake sales, etc.. A woman in a city can be a mom and have a far more texture life outside of that. I don't like what the experience of suburban life did to my mother or the mothers of her generation, which is why we opted to stay in the city. but again, that is a privilege of wealth.

It bears mentioning: the Southwest has a different kind of suburb - these giant towns that focus around 30,000 auditorium mega-churches...sort of a squeaky clean quasi-religious republican suburb. These towns are growing rapidly. That is not my experience nor the experience of most on this site, i'll wager.

And for non-business people, let me be the one to tell you: there is no greater capitalist or materialistic place on earth right now than Asia, full stop.

Weren't cities traditionally where one went to enjoy anonymity?

Until the book came out, I always assumed that the "therapy" part of the site name referred to coping with the barrage of "when are you buying a REAL HOUSE?" demands from people who don't understand that a small apartment is really perfectly fine.

I *prefer* big cities -- but I'm cheerfully superficial and just want my convenient little ethnic-dive restaurants, my short walk to the opera, my quick-to-clean space, and my ability to walk most places I want to go. I don't see it as a moral choice that's inherently superior to other lifestyles.

Kellen,
Sorry I over-reacted! I got protective of the two most down-to-earth people I know, who come from small towns in Idaho and Washington. Growing up with open space, nature and farms just gives them a refreshing perspective. But they really needed the city for exposure to diversity, as well. You are right that cities in the west are more spread out, suburban, sheltered and car-centric. It is a form of deprivation, every strip mall like the last one. (There's a book called "Death by Suburb: How to Keep the Suburbs from Killing Your Soul" that I want to read in case I ever have to go back.) But for me, like Wende, part of the appeal of the city is that you can get lost in the crowd and avoid actual interaction. Do people you share public transit with, or who sit next to you in restaurants, actually TALK to you? I thought that was actually a sign of suburbanism. I have a problem being friendly with neighbours, I LIKE isolation, I call it PRIVACY, but I did admit, I'm spoiled. So I'll continue my self-centeredness (I like to think of it as introspection) but at least I'll have the texture of life in a city!

Jonathan,
I suspected you had some gushy softness underneath the thorny exterior! Love that you protect your wife from soccer-mom-ness. I doubt the contractor who you suspect of sleeping with her can offer that depth of understanding.

Well, Tat, sometimes deprivation makes people appreciate what they have; sometimes it makes them all the more materialistic. You're right, it's not the possesions themselves, but our attitude towards them.

Re: "smaller families", for many people, the sole reason not to have children is that it will affect the lifestyle they have grown accustomed to.

patrick (the other), thanks for the vocab lesson of the day!

Anna, One can be introspective without being self-absorbed. When I think of self-absorbed people, they're the inconsiderate ones who think that they're the center of the universe and they have no respect for personal space - they won't take their backpacks off in a crowded subway car, they barrel down the sidewalk ready to run you over with a stroller, they lay their beach blanket right next to yours when the beach is almost empty, or marinate themselves in so much perfume that when they sit down in a movie theater you're choking on it two rows away.

In the context of the Dalai Lama's quote, I would say that self-absorbed people have forgotten their connection to others, they think that their problems are more important than anyone else's, they don't reach out because they're so busy trying hard to hold on to the things they think will make them happy.

"pphillipp- (great paint chips btw... fuckin' love them)"

well thanks! and the great thing is - you can have them! free!

agree with p2's "family" comments, btw.

Took a break to check out AT (as I oft do), and this discussion is fascinating and actually, strangely, relevant to the kinds of things we discuss on AT. I think that what I have decided to take away from the Dalai Lama's comments is that there is a need for balance (not that that is precisely what is said there--and it could be out of context, because it does seem that he's somehow recommending the Eastern way of life as better)--nothing's black and white. The city is NOT inherently better than the suburbs or vice versa. The East is not inherently better than the West or vice versa. I do think that we have a serious case of affluenza in this country that has muddled our capacity to enjoy *other* things that can fulfill us more than material things alone--whether that is spirtuality, family/other familial-type relationships, thinking, interior design (oh, wait...). I'd also echo what Wende said about the suburbs, because where I'm from in Western PA, there is none of that detachment that others have talked about. I personally grew up in the same house my dad grew up in in the same neighborhood my grandfather grew up in and we knew all of our neighbors. My parents live in another neighborhood now, where we moved when I was 12, and know all the neighbors there, who bring them dinners when they're sick and zucchinis and tomatoes from their gardens. Obviously, things are changing and I tend to romanticize it--because I've left. But, there are times, despite my friends who I love dearly, and the things I like about the city, that I miss this kind of interaction and connection, and feel somehow alone. Especially in DC, I feel like my friends live further and further away in the metro area, people move away, and though I see my neighbors and people from the neighborhood and most are friendly enough, there's still a detachment. Of course, there are benefits too--cultural experiences, exposure to other cultures (that I feel hate me sometimes...), but all I'm saying is that neither is *better*.

On to the material concerns...Curtis, love what you did to the dressers! Do you think that would work with Ikea-like laminate?

Wow - what a lightning rod I posted earlier.

The megachurches are north of me by about 15 miles.... I can't imagine setting foot in one.

I'm one of those people who choose to be connected. But I will add that it is *very* difficult in a place like Dallas with no street culture, and a civic history that only goes back about 150 years.

I love Dallas because it represents home and roots and family/"family" for me - but I can't imagine what it would be like to move here without all the personal history. Dallas can be a strange, distancing place.

I think it's really to oversimplify other cultures, whether they are in a different part of the world or in your own country.

Christine -
Honestly, I think that the more serious primer, Kilz 2 would probably work better, ultimately as a primer than what I used, but yes, I think it would work on that Ikea stuff, too. I am just a tad concerned about how the TOP of his dresser may wear over time.

That's
really easy to oversimplify...
doh!

GODAMNIT. rememember how i ordered the cheap chinese-made knockoff sectional? the godamned morons just tore the godamned leather while trying to move it into my godamned living room. the wife, who stayed home today to oversee the moving, was apparently shoving cookies in her mouth instead of watching these godamned morons. so now i have a $3,000 torn leather godamned piece of sh*t knockoff and no f*cking recourse because i tried to save a buck instead of ordering from room and board where i could have had insured delivery. this is just classic. this is what happens when i try to save a buck. life comes and f*cks me in a*s.

Jonathan, If you wouldn't tighten up so much, you'd enjoy it.

dIANE,
I'm just in denial about the fact that I AM self-absorbed. I'd rather tune out the world, (full of loud-talking, phone-in-the-locker-room people who should go to the suburbs where they can spread out and revel in their own perfume,) and focus on the circus inside my own head. See, I'm still talking about myself...

But I'm not as whiny as Jonathan, either. (How cute, he had to use several expletives and an insulting comment about his wife to "prove" he's not gushy.)

I've been trying to use "ossuary" in a sentence...

$3K for a knock-off? And you call that trying to save a buck? I don't think I feel sorry for you at all.

Anna,

I hate to break this to you, but the loud cell-phone babbling and perfume-dousing are city tactics for establishing one's space and importance. I never encounter as much of either on trips to the 'burbs here -- even if I have to go to the BMW 'burbs in Contra Costa County. Being sensorily "noisy" allows people to remain self-absorbed within very little space.

The noise in the suburbs tends to be large, loud parties, cruising, and other group activities. The last time I encountered anyone on a cell phone in a grocery store where the parents live, it was... uh... me.

Jonathan, help me out here: what's the English equivalent of Russian saying "the stingy one always pays twice"?

Aside: I was too exhausted yesterday after the Fair to look thru your pics; I'll do it tonight, promise.

Paging Curtis: have you looked at the Frame link I posted above? It features casegoods with surfaces composed of molding profiles (that's what you employed in your dresser' project, right?)-but they have used the trick on ALL surfaces.

...

Amen to that.

maryane--
you catch on quick!! :)

hope this is the right place to post this... I'm very interested in a king size baseline bed from CB2. even had a friend in Chicago go to take a look at it in-store, but she reported back that they don't have one on display! she tells me that the beds generally seem sturdy, but I am hesitant to just order one without someone's first hand experience.

so... does anyone here own the baseline bed? and do you cut your ankles or shins on the metal corners or anything? thanks for any advice on this...

P2
I suspected ... = P2
I guess you wouldn't have gone undercover.

i resent being called "whiney". What you see here is masculine, frightening rage. Not whining. Please. Give me some dignity.

Bigger homes, smaller families:
Those who need the space and could put the space to good use don't have it. Those who have the space, don't use it.

Too much choice:
If there were only two sofas, red modern, blue traditional, the choice would be easy, no? Instead we seek out the "perfect" sofa that supposedly says so much about ourselves and our "good taste" that we miss the point of the sofa...to keep our butt off the floor.

Big city life I've found is much like "diffusion of responsibility" in Psychology. There are so many people, so many chances at interaction, TOO many people. How can you ever know them all?

Yes, seeking out other people online that have the same interests does mean something. It's much easier to find people with similar interests online.

But I always wonder, how many other neighbors and people I meet on the street, how many of them do I have something in common with too? IF I SPENT THE TIME, I would know.

So I tend to treat others as if we DO have something in common. None of the pictures of people on this site have labeled them as being someone who knows or is interested in design. Nothing in their appearance says "I, too, live in an apartment, you and I have something in common."

My nightmare would be to see a post on a board somewhere that describes an interaction with a stranger, that was a bad experience...only to realize that the board friend was actually the person I had the bad personal experience with. LOL!

I figure there's something we all have in common, if we take the time to find out what it is. And there's probably something about every one of us that the other would find absolutely appalling. LOL! Perhaps as simple as "you voted for WHO?"

Rachel (in Denver)...thanks for the litter box bench link. Looks good. But GEEZ!!! Didja look at the price?

"kattbank comes in 14 different lacquer finishes and four different wood veneer options for prices ranging from $1750 to $2200."

They're going to have to move the decimal point to the left before I'm jumping on the bandwagon. There used to be an unfinished toy box at IKEA that doubled as a bench for 10-20 dollars.

Let's see, David and Im's table saw...Curtis' paint talent..insta-bitchin-cat-box-bench

Andree--
Um, why do you assume the collective tools and talents of David and Curtis would yield a price tag any lower!?

Pixie--
Please! I always take full "credit" for my questionable comments and dubious double entendres.

P2-I'm shocked that I even for a moment doubted this!

Andree--
re: "Instead we seek out the 'perfect' sofa that supposedly says so much about ourselves and our 'good taste' that we miss the point of the sofa...to keep our butt off the floor."

I think there is more to a sofa (or bench or chair) than that.

Um, I think the *beauty of design* (and art and music...) has an important place in our lives.

I think there is indeed a difference between "conspicuous consumption" or buying something to make a statement to our friends, and making sure something that functions also has as much beauty as we can afford... "afford" being relative to the person, and the situation at hand.

But the desire for beauty doesn't mean the buyer is superficial, a label whore or socially irresponsible.

Andree quoth: "Too much choice: If there were only two sofas, red modern, blue traditional, the choice would be easy, no? Instead we seek out the "perfect" sofa that supposedly says so much about ourselves and our "good taste" that we miss the point of the sofa...to keep our butt off the floor."

Perhaps. But the AT community is built around the premise that the RIGHT sofa -- the sofa that perfectly displays one's good taste and style -- is a life-changing acquisition, and that merely keeping one's butt off the floor is emotionally and psychologically deadening.

That's why it's rubbing me the wrong way to hear people announce that apartment living is more enlightened and non-materialistic than being in the 'burbs. If anything, we hanging out here care *more* about how our stuff reflects our style than do the suburbanites who just buy a living room suite at Ethan Allen and call it good.

Having lived with real non-materialism before merging my furniture with my husband's -- his apartment was scantily decorated in the theme of "someone gave it to me" -- I find shallow materialism works really well for me.

Yikes - my comments are aimed at Andree, not at p(too), who was posting almost simultaneously. I agree with p(too).

Wende, don't back off: you should attack P2 whenever possible, whether warranted or not. If you read AT's historical posts carefully, you will ultimately conclude that P2 is a profoundly evil man. Certain sources inform me that he tortures puppies, sodomizes rabbits, drinks his grapefruit-juice-with-extra-pulp from the carton and occasionally turns his cellphone on vibrates, crams it somewhere and then calls himself.

This is not a man to apologize to.

Jonathan -- Fancy that! So you're sure he's everything I admire in a man. Pity I'm not one, too.

OK, forced to stop luking and speak up...

I do live in the "BMW suburbs of Contra Costa County" and work in San Francisco. I hope that the term "suburbanite" doesn't strictly refer to anyone who has chosen to leave the city for a little peace and quiet, good schools, etc. I love that I can walk from my house to a reservoir and even have wild turkeys and deer roam our street. I also love that I come to the city everyday and enjoy the diverse restaurants, shops, cultures.

I assure you that a) my home is not huge and b) my living room is decorated with items that reflect who I am as a person, not what the buyer at the chain store. Over the years I have carefully chosen items that make me happy - whether from DWR or the Oakland salvage yards.

Wende, your defense of the west coast suburbs is admirable and understandable but I think does not represent the (trying to find the right word in the context of suburbs) majority of the suburbs in the US. That is if research on the last 30 or 40 years of the growth of suburbs suggests.

Good for you that you know a place that is different from the norm and that even those places that are the same will revert back to utopia when these ppl lose their jobs, but I don't think you represent what is really going on just as my experience with getting to know a huge community of ppl in our downtown nyc hood (through kids, neighbours etc) represents life in nyc. To a vast number of ppl, city living can be isolated. I am fortunate that this is not the case for me.

No offense BTW, but your statements do seem to be definitive.

I also think it's all relative to what you hold important.

Some people don't bat an eye on spending hundreds or thousands on dinner out when McDonald's is cheaper, four-star accomodations when one star will "do," a bottle of wine when a six-pack of Schlitz will get you just as buzzed, or a pair of Jimmy Choos when PayLess just as effectively "keeps your soles off the pavement."

I agree, P2. I feel that way about tiles (imported from italy and gorgeous) and prostitutes (I insist on hiring only those WITHOUT chlaymyddia)

Jamie Pup, I respect your points immensely but strongly suspect that we've read the same books on suburbia. They always strike me as having been written by scholars from New England or NYC who are so busy scorning what they're looking at that they don't take the time to understand it.

My own little book chapter in this field argues pretty strongly that "urban" and "suburban" have simply become fancy ways of saying "good" and "evil" -- quite apart from realistic depictions of urban or suburban life, or from even coming up with clear characterizations of what counts as "urban" versus "suburban."

Where "suburban" used to mean community, connections, etc., now we use "urban" the same way and claim that suburbia lacks all these things -- without troubling to check whether our little anecdotes about the goodness of it all apply to anyone but a handful of upper-middle-class intellectuals and professionals.

Starting to get snarky *and* referencing my own publications is probably a sign I should clean the kitchen, though. :-)

P2, if it costs $2,000 to cut a hole and paint, I think I can buy the tool and do it myself.

Too much "us and them"...putting everyone into broad categories that may not apply. I do it too. LOL!

I noticed some of the "complaints" for the Smallest, Coolest, was that everyone seemed to have the same/similar furnishings? Does that reflect "good taste" or simply liking the same things? Is it liking the same things, or conforming to everyone's expectations as to what is considered "good taste"? Does a certain chair actually say something? And if so, what?

I dunno.

I thought 'urban' was code for
'having access to broader culture'

all the rest of it
(alienation or community)
is up for grabs

and if I had a choice between a red and blue sofa
(the same red and blue sofa that everyone else had)
I'd grab one and start tearing it up to make my own
as would my favorite people on this site
(some would have to hire Curtis to do it for them, but whatever)

When it comes to talking about city v. suburb, I think the point is that there IS no "norm" and that thinking anything is definitively one way or another is wrong. I personally can't even speak for what it's like in the vast suburbs of identical reproduced mcmansion housing developments. I do generally make value judgements toward those kinds of places, which I find repulsive for simple land consumption reasons alone. However, some people may have developed great communities there. People certainly like living there for some reason...and I doubt every single one is a soulless selfish person who keeps to themselves. I just love when city dwellers (of which I am one) think themselves somehow superior or assume it's a vastly preferable lifestyle. I'm being redundant to previous posts, but maybe if you can stroll down to your gourmet store and peruse the precise mustard you need for that sauce for your filet that night and then return where the doorman helps you with your purchases, it's a glorious lifestyle...but if you live in an area of the city where you can barely make it to the corner store where you pay 3x the amount for a can of soup (and not because it's from England or something) for fear of being shot, let alone a supermarket in another part of the city, I can see how the suburbs would hold an appeal. Not to mention for the people in the middle who would like their children to attend good schools and be able to play outside. Having no kids and having a tolerance for some discomfort, I like living in the city, but there are some clear advantages to the "other" side, too.

if you REALLY want to distill urbanism in America to its essence, I suppose you could define it as (i) decent Chinese food, (ii) Jews and (iii) proximity to black people. take away any of these elements and you don't have a city.

I merely put that out there.

Andree--
Ah, yes, you can beat that price for sure as a DIY project. My point was that the talents of talented people like Curtis should not necessarily be assumed to be inexpensive (even though he is outrageously generous with his great and creative advice.)

"The people who paid the price for the alientation of the suburbs were the wives, whose daily grist consisted of driving the kids around and interacting through the social prism of kids, schools, bake sales, etc.. A woman in a city can be a mom and have a far more texture life outside of that."

oh, yes, so much has changed for the woman in the big, wonderful city. so much so, that it seemed totally natural for you to note that a woman can be a mom and a career gal in the city, yet you never mention what the FATHER is doing.

the default assumption is still, for many, that the woman takes the responsibility for raising the kids, and the man doesn't "make such compromises."

I wish there was a separate session for the discussion of this article. Its an interesting topic. Thank you for the posting.
I am American, and was raised in a midwestern US suburb with Mcmansions, chain resturants, high divorce rates, alcoholic teenagers, and overscheduled kids. I don't care to live in that sort of enviornemnt ever again but my parents will remain there until they retire.
My home life did differ from those of many I knew in the community, and I do liken that to my parents being African immigrants. They grew up poor and never acquired a taste for consumerism, although they appreciated the US for it's opportunities for employment and professional acclaim. There was a strange tension between the values and experiences they brought from home to the US, and the life they were now living and raising children in. We went home a lot, so I always understood simple living, sacrifice, and downright poverty. I never romanticized those things either though, and knew I wanted something different. My family wanted more for me as well, and never thought they were "noble" or "enlightened" for their situation. Our family at home is very proud of us and do not judge our relative affluence with moral disdain.
As an adult I try very hard to strike a balance between attainment of all sorts, and centerdness in my faith (Christian service with social justice liberalism), family (small but close), and spirit(flighty, free, and sometimes burdened). I feel grounded and comfortable with the luxuries I do have (i.e. free time and means to peruse AT) and not guilty about the. I dont use anyone (including the Dali Lama) elses values as a metric for my lifestyle. I

yes, pphilipp, the default assumption IS that the wife is the primary caregiver in most American families. Ahoy, mate, and welcome to the Good Ship Reality! Feel free to join us on a break from the coffee cafe at Brown University.

Wende: I kind of was thinking that all the annoying folks should be SENT to the burbs, but I take it back, because it sounds too much like WWII Japanese containment camps.

"no longer a city dweller": I did generalize about suburbs based on my experience: an interstate in the back yard and a half an hour walk to anything that was NOT another cookie-cutter house (probably with a white family and 2.5 kids inside.) What reward did I get for my childhood trek? A gourmet market? No, Walmart. (Shudder. Another can of worms.)

Andree, I DO tend to treat others as if we have something in common: I assume that they also wish I would leave them alone. That's why I married an anti-social hermit. It's also why Jonathan's (very un-whiny,) chauvinistic, masculine, frightening rage makes me laugh instead of offending.

Now somebody tell Deborah about the CB2 bed!

"Ahoy, mate, and welcome to the Good Ship Reality!"

...and god forbid anyone question "reality"!

i was trying to highlight how little things have changed in certain arenas, but i guess you missed that while obsessing over your coffee at cafe self-involvement, eh?

Anna -

I understand your generalization - I lived for a short time in one of those types of suburbs (used to joke with the husband that one of us had to stay sober so we would know which house was ours). I never saw any of my neighbors. I hated it there. I also lived in an urban area where I learned to identify the type of gun by the sound of the shots. And I lived in San Francisco for years and loved every minute of it.

But things change. I am adopting a child and the birthmother and I had an understanding that I would provide a safe and comfortable home and all of things that she could not.

I think we tend to forget that there are other types of communities. My town currently has only 24,000 residents, and has fought any developer who wishes to build a gated community of mcmansions and certainly no Wal-Mart-type business would be tolerated. I only recently discovered that there was even a fast-food "restaurant". Maybe that's more typical of California (somewhat) coastal areas than the midwest - I don't know from personal experience.

I guess my point is, there are a lot of assumptions about folks who don't/can't dwell within the city limits. I'm only 18 miles from the city and strive to take the best from both worlds.

Anna, yeah, I think that people wish I'd leave them alone too. LOL! I talk to anyone anywhere about anything.

Maybe it's because I was raised in a small town, of about a thousand people and everyone knew everyone.

So I strike up conversations with people I don't know and may never see again. I'm the person you wished worked at the local stores, because I'm the person who shows you the various products and where they are located. Of course, if I worked there, they wouldn't let me do what I do...and when they do let me do what I do best, the rest of the employees have a day off all day at work...like when I leave the job and they actually ask me "who's going to do all the work now that you're leaving?"

Anna, Jonathan tickles me. LOL! I love to read his horror stories every day. Maybe because he's like me. There's the part in common...stuff goes wrong all the time for him, just the way it does for me. Just want to give him a big hug and say "yup, tomorrow's going to suck too".

I'm living in San Francisco, city and county, and yet I couldn't be farther away from the downtown areas than I am...without living outside the county. I have no knowledge of anything that goes on downtown or what people do there.

The few times I've been outside my little area I walk around gaping at the buildings and the people and the shops and the streets and all the activity. I'm always surprised at how many others don't look around at their surroundings at all. How there aren't many smiles. Like they have to save their smiles up for only the few people they really know well. Smile at some "strangers" and they clutch their pocketbook.

It never says that I'm entering a "bad-high-crime" area and I'm surprised to hear someone got shot next to the place I ate at the other day. Because I walk around blissfully ignorant and smiling at everyone like they're all my best friends. I think this confuses people, and they may think I'm insane and therefore steer clear.

*pphillipp, I'll give you one example of what Father is doing (only the most famous blogger in US, if not in the world): takes care of little Gnat while her mother's ot most of the time in a day being a big-shot lawyer; writes at least 4 columns in various newspapers, appears in radio talk-programs, maintains 4 or 5 ongoing blogs every day, and writes books. Oh, what hilarious (and true) books!

Buy his "Interior desecrations", f.ex, you'll not be sorry.

I can't refuse myself a pleasure of linking to sample pages of the Lileks' book (at my signature); enjoy!

Oh, he also has another book, called the Gallery of regrettable food (http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/index.html)
a valid counterpart to ID.

I think this discussion is all superficial, anecdotal, and boring.

Tat -
I tried to go to that site, but it never came up on my computer; sounds interesting though.

P2-
If I wasn't so anti-gun, I'd force you to be my agent at gun-point.

I hope that all this talk of "hiring" Curtis to do all this stuff will one day plant some seeds that will make it bloody happen!

Curtis,
I put the link @ my signature; flash - and some patience- required; go to their "objects" cathegory and then to "frames". I love the way he disguised the drawers under all this opulence - and also the vertical application; brilliant.

You can be sure Curtis, once I finally buy my own place, you'll be the one hired to paint that "merry dancers" frieze.

OK, now it misbehaves on my computer, too.
I included a different link, Curtis.

In the unlikely event anyone is awake and has a view on Chinese stools (I refer to the chairs, not Oriental bowel movements):

Nnow that the entry hallway is done with tile installed and shoe cabinets afixed to the wall, it is time for a BENCH so icky guests can take off their icky shoes without ruining my beautiful restored wide plank pine floors. So the question is: which is better, a Chinese stool (Room and Board does a nifty rendition for a hundred bucks) or an Eames knockoff from Ebay, about $250?

A lot of developments today: sofa, plasma, electrical, recessed halogens, finished tile. Time to take more pictures.

Grrr. Just reading this OT now. Missed the whole thing.

I agree with folks who have spoken to the fact that each culture has positive and negative aspects. Learn from all cultures; take the good stuff, leave the bad stuff.

With regards to the urban/suburban topic:
Can we talk about health here? Can anyone deny that the vast American car culture is simply not healthy? Not for our planet, our pocketbooks, or for the health of our own bodies?

Jonathan,

I am up. But should go to bed. As for the stools, which do you like better?

Meant to post this before - loved your coffee table links from the other day which you posted for NT. Made me smile.

Jonathan,

For some reason, I really don't like the Eames chairs. The look more like plant stand than anything. If the R&B stool you like is the Chinese stool for 129, I think, along your line, they look like for people with big butts... Maybe the Mingshi stool, or better yet, the Shinto bench from R&B?

Jonathan, that stool mentioned at Room and Board, it's not deep enough:
http://www.roomandboard.com/rnb/prod.do?pfid=399885&grpType=0

It's only 10" deep. That's a one-butt-cheek stool. If you side sideways. People may have to cross and uncross their legs in order to put shoes on and take them off, and all the shifting around...well, I'd end up toppling over backwards, scraping the stool all the way down the wall, with the legs of the stool all across the new floor...which kind of would be worse than folks walking on it.

Geez, I fall off this chair occasionally, putting shoes on and off.

Although the Chinese Stool does look like the letters AT together. LOL!

a "one butt cheek stool"...i'm smiling and not through my morning 'jo yet

Tat -
That credenza IS brilliant, isn't it? Wow! Makes me want to go out and buy one of those big ole electric mitre saws! Of course I have no workshop, but I'm not sure that would stop me, except that I'm reeeeeeally trying to acqure excess crap. I'm wondering if I should investigate places where I could rent such a thing in case I got a bug in my bonnet to make something like that.

Curtis, you should do a regular how-to column for AT.

Thanx, Pixie. I think that would be a fun thing, actually. Not sure exactly how that would look, but it would be a fun thing to do. DEFINITELY.

I love this thread. All this chat about non-materialism on a decorating website.
The best part is, "let's do Maxwell's The Cure. Go buy the book!" More materialism. The irony!
Excellent!

Materialism doesn't mean that you don't ever buy anything. Materialism means you are obsessed with your possessions and the impression you make on others.

Here's the dictionary definition:
1. Philosophy - The theory that physical matter is the only reality and that everything, including thought, feeling, mind, and will, can be explained in terms of matter and physical phenomena.
2. The theory or attitude that physical well-being and worldly possessions constitute the greatest good and highest value in life.
3. A great or excessive regard for worldly concerns.

Me, many of the homes featured in the contest have not been expensively decorated. pphillipp's, for example, was one of the crowd's favorites.
I'm not sure how spending $200 furnishing an apartment is materialistic.

I also feel that buying Maxwell's book is a show of appreciation for the great site he has given us. If that's materialistic, so be it.

Plus, I probably have a lot to learn.

"pphillipp's, for example, was one of the crowd's favorites.
I'm not sure how spending $200 furnishing an apartment is materialistic"

it was?? shucks!

that's me, mr. anti-materialism. or, as sally called me, in another thread, "plain ol' cheap." charmed, i'm sure.