This is hilarious. I'm guessing she's not using her tee shirts and sweaters as packing material for her dishes like I am...
If she were moving farther do you think each mirror would be on a separate flight?

So I guess my move's nothing like Martha's. I picked up 70 banana boxes from my local supermarket (small town, they gladly obliged) and we moved them using two hairy guys in a ratty old pick up truck. The furniture went into a UHaul (I know, I swore never to use them again but they were the only ones with a truck available) and down to a friend's big old barn (the kind Martha would doll up and have a candlelit party there, with horses looking on). The hairy guys needed lots of direction which they weren't fond of at ALL but we got the stuff there without breakage. BTW, banana paper makes awesome frame packing material, even though none of mine are nineteenth century mirrors. Whatever works, I guess.

Spacesha,

That is absolutely genius. I am sooo packing my dishes in t-shirts next time!!

Last time we moved across town, we transported all the small stuff ourselves and left only the furniture to the professionals. It kept our moving costs way down and made it much easier to unpack, since we did it over a week or so and knew where everything was.

When we made a much larger move (from SoCal to Seattle), my man's employers covered the costs of movers. These guys packed everything with a forest's worth of brown paper and boxes. It took FOREVER to unpack. Nothing was labeled, and their packing methods were very questionable. They wrapped non-breakable items in 15 pieces of paper, and then shoved my gorgeous Jasper Morrison Rowenta coffeemaker in a box, unprotected, which caused it to crack.

If you don't have a staff like Martha to handle all your moving stuff -- like a carpenter to cut pieces to protect your mirrors -- I recommend an in-between approach if you hire movers. At the very least, stay in the room and label the boxes as they pack up. Otherwise, instead of unpacking quickly and efficiently, you'll spend a month wondering where your kitchen utensils are.

ps I love Martha too, and her magazine is great. I once went to a taping of her live show and found her a bit intimidating between shots, and totally smiley during. I've also heard amusing stories from friends of friends who've worked for her. Don't dare bring in cupcakes that you didn't slave over personally.

Purchase new packing material? Doesn't she have stacks of dirty boxes crammed under beds and behind bookshelves from the last 14 times she moved? No? Well I do. I also find it silly to buy bubble wrap to pack breakables separate from clothes/towels/sheets/etc. I just pack them all together. Saves space and money. But maybe when I have her income I'll move like she does. :)

We once moved all of our things in a 10' travel trailer. But the trailer wasn't built to haul that much. So instead of packing it over again to a moving truck or bigger trailer...we wenched the trailer on to a car trailer.
I'm pretty sure Martha would have died.

Martha Stewart is amusingly surreal, almost Absurdist. She's always pictured with that exaggerated head tilt. She may be trying to look "real," but only looks more like a mannequin. She's so phony that I never liked her or her colors, not even long before her trial. I used to call her Ms. Sage 'n' Beige. The only way I can enjoy her is to laugh at her.

My boyfriend (now hub) and I once moved our things in garbage bags. The new tenants arrived WAY earlier than they should have. Anything that was not already packed and/or unbreakable was tossed in heaftys.

Don't you think Martha sits around on a Friday night, with empty Chinese take out containers strewn about all around her, wearing an old moth-eaten and stained Hard Rock Cafe Acapulco tshirt, watching Housewives of NJ and yelling at the tv? I really want this to be true.

I'm addicted to her magazine too. The above tips read almost like an unintentional satire of the DIY-er. And that photo above: so much art (or "aesthetics" of her Empire), horror and comedy of manic perfection all rolled into one - and only, Martha Dearest.

the image of martha packing cracks me up. i think she has help :)

I associate Martha's absurd poise with her modeling days in the 70s.

This relates to the post a few days ago about intra-neighborhood moves, too, but when I my then boyfriend/now hubby moved into my tiny apt, we used an abandoned CVS cart to move everything. It was only a couple of blocks, but that move was the weirdest by far!

If you do have ridiculous amounts of antiques and real furniture, I recommend hiring any reliable teenage boys you know.

My little brother spent countless hours helping one of my mom's friends move from a very large house. Great for her because he was cheaper (and arguably more reliable) than movers, and great for him because he was making more money than his regular job (and in cash).

Also, sell some of your crap first! Shouldn't moving be the time when you reconsider your "collection of 19th century mirrors"

The last time I moved was from my college apartment into a house. Furniture came from a hodge-podge of places, and on several different days. We mainly used two vehicles: my dad's giant SUV, and my roommate's dad's minivan. We bought some, brought from college, got from parents' houses, and even got a dining set from my now-husband's parents.

Up until now, nothing was too precious to be broken. With my next move, it's going to be a lot more careful and a lot more stuff!

We recently moved and used a big goose-neck horse trailer for most of it. lol. wish I could move her way!

Our recent move (from our first two bedroom apartment as a married couple to our first house)was done over the course of two months since we had two months between getting our house and ending the lease (just the way things worked out). We took over a car load almost every time we went over to the house for the first month (while we painted and stuff like that), then rented a small Uhaul and moved all the furniture (with the help of two friends) over at the end of the first month, then got the rest of the stuff from the apartment in car loads over the next month (while we were cleaning up the apartment and such). It was dragged over a long time span and I still have a couple boxes to unpack, but it was kind of nice that it wasn't a big huge burden at any point (and it was cheap, even with gas since we were going back and forth anyway).

During that time we also had our parents bring out some stuff they had for us (while they came to see the new house) and we brought a ton of stuff back when we visited them for a family function. But we just crammed stuff into the car and one the little platform trailer we have, nothing fancy like Martha!

Martha might be controvertial, but she is self-made & can now do & say what she wants really

We hired packers/movers for an out-of-state move. A few months later, when the holiday season came around, we looked for the folding chairs and the liquor from the bar and both were missing.
I have a vision of a bunch of tired movers sitting on folding chairs, drinking our CASE of 12-year-old scotch that was left over from our wedding.
Oh well, they didn't break anything...

So Martha didn't have to have all her stuff gassed in the moving truck for three days to kill the bedbugs? That's what MY last move consisted of....

I sat down to read some AT to escape the packing process (and redoing the front porch complete with columns and a bizillion spindles) and now I feel even more anxious!! I wonder if Martha would come over for a while and lend me a hand....at least send over a few of her well-trained employees.

LOL! I should file this next to Gwyneth Paltrow's cookbook... ;-)

Martha, your chadelier candles are crooked.

Always interesting, I kind of see her as a real-life version of Happy Homemaker Sue-Ann Nivens. Charming and endearing on camera, dragon lady when cameras stopped. 8^O

I expected Martha's move to include color-coordinated, hand-crafted labels with calligraphy. Or maybe handmade paper to cushion her china.

Every move I've made, except two, has been done with trucks, a borrowed flat-bed trailer, and the help of friends and family. And the two moves that were the exceptions were when my mom gave me some furniture and it was easier to hire movers and when my husband and I did our first cross state move and were on a time constraint (so we snagged a Uhaul).

As far as the mirrors go, they are apparently more resilient than you think. My dad gifted my mom a HUGE 4x6 ft mirror years ago and it's went through 3 moves over the years and has (knock on wood) never broken. The last move was from her house to my house, 150ish miles away. I was paranoid the entire trip that it would break, but there wasn't a scratch on it.

Can you imagine the fear for their life those movers must have felt moving her 19th century mirrors, with her hovering over the top of them?

We have never hired movers, just my brother. I give him a few bucks, pay for his meals while he's working, and he's happy. We've used U-Haul trucks and horse trailers. (hey, we even hose the trailers out before using them!) I get all my boxes free from the grocery store, and I, too, wrap things in towels and tshirts, and use garbage bags.

While I love Martha, she is absurd and has no concept of 'real' people. I remember watching her show years ago. On that episode, she was going on and on about how to feed a weekly group of friends. I was interested because I usually had between 10-15 people each weekend over for a game night.

She showed the viewers how to make Shitaki mushrooms as an appetizer for each person. I laughed hysterically as I realized what she gave to one person for an appetizer was more than I was paying for dinner for ALL 15 people at my home. While I realize my budget was slim and my skills were meager, it was still insane to think that the average American household will purchase a $15 per lb. (if they can find it) appetizer for a large dinner party. Maybe for a wedding, but not a weekly dinner party, which is what she was suggesting.

It's nice she shares how the other half lives. =)

Ms. Sage 'n Beige - I love it!

It's just surreal to suggest to make 20 trips just to move the china...
I agree with Zilla-Mama, you must have time and money to do something she suggest...

(something that Martha suggests)*

Movers are worth every penny. My last move I packed up the boxes and the movers took over. We were only moving about a mile from our former place. The movers put all of the furniture in place and even set up the bed. All I had to do was stand in the hallway and point when they came through the door. By the time I went to bed that night we were completely unpacked. The next day all I had to do was hang the artwork and mirrors. Best money I ever spent.

I've moved more times than I can count - most of the time with cardboard boxes. I discovered rentable (and recyclable) plastic moving boxes and gave them a try on my most recent move to Vancouver BC. It ended up saving me time (so easy to pack/stack) and a lot of waste cardboard to deal with at the end. Just thought I'd pass it on. Great article.

Oh Martha, you really shouldn't pack your dog in that box, no matter how big the box is!

I thought we were the only people who had moved using a (marginally clean) horse trailer! And get this, Martha, when we moved using a horse trailer, we were moving into a trailer park. (It was on-campus family housing at my husband's university, but still!)

My husband and I have had ten full-household moves in the almost six years we've been married including three during my second pregnancy. In our last move (five months ago) we used a rusty box truck owned by my husband's company. Yes, my sofa got rust stains.

We are now preparing to move across the country at the end of the month, and it will be our first move with professional movers who come and pack and move everything. Makes me feel like a regular Martha Stewart! Our last cross country move we used Relocubes, which actually worked really well and I would highly recommend.

I'm in the process of moving now. I have a month of overlap between my furnished temporary flat and my new place so I'm doing it almost entirely by packing my suitcases and taking them on the subway (no, I don't have any large furniture to transport, luckily!).

It's not so bad, and I can get each load unpacked and in place before bringing over the next load.

Unlike martha, it only took me one trip to transport my "china" =)

I would have thought that "moving the Martha Stewart way" would simply entail ordering your servants to deal with it.

It reminds me of a moment in which an expert on Oprah was giving tips on how to organise some aspect of domestic life, and she asked, with rather subtle archness, how Oprah herself dealt with these problems. Oprah just gave a fractional smile and said, "I have people."

She has tips on how to pack your chandeliers? Shouldn't chandeliers kind of be left behind? You'd be pretty pissed off if you thought the chandeliers you saw at the open house inspections had disappeared when you moved in!

20 round trips to move the china! Wow, I thought I had a lot of stuff. I've moved several times over the last year due to the downsizing economy and each time I have less. I'm actually enjoying the less stuff. My last move I filled the back of a large pick up truck and my car, and did it in one trip. I thought that was a lot.

I'm a moving pro! Nine times in the last six years, in fact. Can we put moving tips here, or is this not really That Thread?

Doing it anyway.

1. Pack a First Day box with anything you need to get ready for bed on your first day/get up the next morning on your second day. Coffee maker, two mugs, one spoon, one clean flat sheet and your favorite pillow, your basic toiletries. Whatever.

2. For people who are moving whole households, pack a First Week box! Extra clean towels, a basic saucepan/frying pan and four plates, etc. I'm usually unpacked by about Day Two but if you have a lot of stuff, you might still be searching for your linens on Day Nine. Don't be. Put them in the First Week box.

3. Put like things with like when you pack. Wrapping your dishes in Tshirts might seem like a good idea until you can't find your Tshirts because you forgot that one box of dishes and it's now in an attic/closet/storage space. Put all your Tshirts in one place, and get some used/recyclable newspapers for your dishes.

4. LABEL BOXES. This is a big reason for putting "like with like", so you can write "decor" or "sewing" or "books" or "folded clothes" or "dishes fragile/non-fragile" on the outside. You don't want to have to write "1 lamp w/o shade, 4 sweaters, a bunch of hangers, and extra vacuum attachments from the depths of my closet" on a box, ever.

5. Put all latching, fastening, and shelving hardware in ziploc baggies and tape it to the articles of furniture in question. Remove all shelves from shelving, stack 'em flat, and secure them to each other by wrapping them both ways with saran wrap so they make one bundle. Wrap the shelf support hardware onto one end, underneath several layers of plastic wrap.

6. Use plastic wrap to wrap up dresser drawers with their contents still in them! This way the drawers can be stacked and you don't have to empty them out. Plus the dresser is lighter and easier to move (without damage!) when the drawers are out. Also use plastic wrap to make sure cabinet doors don't open, folding bookshelves don't unfold, jewelry boxes don't spring open in transit, folding garment racks can be transported in one piece, and mirrors have pieces of cardboard and something rigid in front of them (I cut up unused packing boxes, slap them on the full-length mirror glass, reinforce with the yardstick, and Saran wrap the lot). You'll use a lot of plastic wrap, is what I'm saying, so stuck the hell up.

Martha's carbon footprint must be HUGE!!!