You've decorated. You've cleaned the whole house. You've cooked up delicious gourmet foods and compiled a well-stocked bar. You've got a killer theme, and you've invited the most interesting people you know. You've spent weeks preparing for this party — but what you do in the last 30 minutes before it starts could be just as important as everything that has come before. Here are five things you don't want to forget.
I love throwing parties, but I also tend to be a terrible procrastinator. This is a bad combination. One thing I've learned, through lots of trial and error, is that nothing throws the mojo of a party off faster than a crazy, stressed-out hostess. So wherever you find yourself at the 30 minute mark, drop everything else and do these five things.
1. Check the temperature.
Having a lot of people packed into a few rooms will make your house a lot hotter. Depending on the size of your space, even if the weather is quite cool outside, you may need to turn on your air conditioner. At the very least, turn the heat down — it's much easier to make the house warmer later if people are uncomfortable than to try to cool it down.
2. Turn on the music.
Every party, no matter how wild it gets later on, usually starts out with a few early guests standing around, making polite chit-chat. Having music not only helps set the tone for the party, it also helps fill in some of those awkward silences as things are getting started. At the beginning of the party, keep the volume low enough so that guests can hear each other — later, if there's a big crowd or you're in the mood for dancing, you can turn the music up.
3. Turn down the lights.
Your guests will have a hard time getting comfy at your party if your lighting scheme says 'doctor's office', so turn the lights down a little. Dimmers are great for this, but if you don't have those, turn on lamps instead of florescents. Light candles. Everybody looks good in warm, low lighting.
4. Put beverages and food where people can easily find them.
It doesn't matter that you have a smashing assortment of delicious craft beers if they're hidden on the bottom shelf of your fridge. Most guests, unless they're very comfortable in your home, won't go looking around for food or drinks — they'll gravitate towards whatever is easy to come by. So put food and drinks in a spot where they'll be easily visible and accessible to anyone just walking in. Try to put the food/drink table in a place where it won't be blocked by an accumulation of people later on — nothing's more frustrating than staring at a bottle of wine, just out of reach on a table that's three deep in chatty, immovable party guests.
If your drinks require ice, don't expect that your guests will somehow know to get ice from the freezer — get a small ice chest, or ice bucket, with a scoop, and place it on the table right next to the drinks.
5. Have a drink.
Or if you don't drink, grab a coke, or a few bites, or whatever it is that relaxes you and puts you in the party mood. You're the host, so your guests will be taking their cues from you. If you're stressed out, running around and trying to get things done, your guests will be stressed too. If you're relaxed, having a drink and enjoying yourself, your guests will follow suit. So have a drink, relax, and enjoy your guests and your party. You've earned it.
(Image: Jen SiskaErin & Danny Living Together in Only 500 Square Feet)

Shaw's Original Fir...
Great ideas. Especially controlling the temperature and lighting.
Great tips, I am endlessly surprised how many parties I attend that have no music playing for the duration of the party.....and also the brightly lit parties are so common, I don't really know why people don't think of the mood.....very awkward......also the drinks and ice in the fridge happens too frequently.....thanks for a common sense but very useful posting...
These are my top party-planning secrets as well! I always say - good, music, dim the lights, and have more alcohol than you think you'll need. The worst is running out of alcohol mid-party. And having a drink 30 min before the guests arrive is imperative (or whatever relaxes you). Your stress will show and like the author said, your mood sets the tone.
I wonder why everybody thinks that MORE alcohol makes a better party?
Last 30 minutes before everyone is due to arrive? Sit down, have a cup of tea or coffee, a quick something to eat, respray yourself with smellies, check makeup, hug your helper(s), make sure your pets are safe, spray scent in bathroom/toilet.
And put out more non-alcoholic drinks.
Fantastic tips, I'm excited to read what others suggest. While not as glamorous as lighting and music, I always suggest double-checking the bathroom. Light a nice, mild scented candle, empty the waste-basket, and make sure there is plenty of toilet-paper out so guests don't have to awkwardly search out more.
1. Put out new toilet paper roll.
2. Clear space for boots and coats.
3. Invite (or Warn) your neighbors.
4. refresh your memory for all names of spouses coming with.
5. turn on the outdoor lights.
I always check the bathrooms right before guests arrive. A helpful thing to do is to sit down on the toilet and have a look around the room - THAT'S the view your guests will be getting of your bathroom! Do you see any clutter or dust bunnies? Fix 'em, fast. And while you're at it, flip up the lid to see if there's any grossness to deal with, because that's what the men will be seeing.
I also put out drinks first, so even if people are early they can fix themselves a drink while I fuss about in the kitchen.
Another trick of mine is to designate a couple of friends to be the "VIP Crew." That means they come about an hour early to help my husband and me with last-minute setup (and get first crack at the snacks). This also means that as early guests arrive, they don't feel like the dorks who showed up first, because there are already several friends there.
I vote no candles...one errant tipsy person, or dangling sleeve, and you've got a fire.
Oh, and if you do all this, and have a few minutes left, fill up one of your medicine cabinets with ping-pong balls. They make a HUGE clatter when someone goes rummaging through your bathroom.
This is funny, the 30-minute countdown. Makes me think of kids' parties where everyone arrives bang on time and all at once.
You've decorated. You've cleaned the whole house. You've cooked up delicious gourmet foods and compiled a well-stocked bar. You've got a killer theme, and you've invited the most interesting people you know.
Hold on, I have? I've done all that? I think I disagree with the premise of your suggestions.
I would love to be this put together, but in reality I'm usually...
1. Manically vacuuming
2. Trying to cram extra stuff into hidden spaces
3. Washing dishes from things I tried to cook too close to the party
4. Getting yelled at for doing everything last minute
5. Showering
A reminder to make sure the candle is not placed where it can easily be knocked over (especially by guests who've taken to the eggnog) or, if there are children at the party, it's totally out of reach. You know, drunk/child-proof. My friend's aunt had a candle in the bathroom (along with a '80s wall-to-wall carpet) and I ended up stomping out a fire started by a 3 year old, making for an unforgettable Christmas!
I could have used this before our last big party, and we won't be having another one until later next year. But I'm definitely saving these tips for the next one, as well as setting a timer so I don't miss those last 30 minutes and adding WendyMR's ideas about pets and bathroom scents.
Last 30 minutes...let's see:
For the bathroom:
1. Stash anything sensitive in the medicine cabinet away in a bedroom drawer (meds, hemorrhoid cream, whatever you don't want people to see - guests can be NOSY!)
2. Like bettyjomoore said, put out a brand new roll and keep one readily available.
3. Stash Advil, tampons, band aids and hairspray in an easy to find spot.
4. Wipe out sink, edges of bathtub, the toilet and mirror. Then wet a paper towel and wipe down the floor - the whole thing takes less than 10 minutes.
Keep in mind that the bathroom is the only well-lit place (if you keep the lights dim elsewhere), so it should at least LOOK clean.
For the Kitchen:
1. Put out food - something, ANYTHING while the rest is baking, if necessary.
2. Put the ice out near the bar and uncork the wine
3. Have a drink (but not red wine - it will stain your teeth and lips - save it for later)
4. Set out the glasses
For the Living Space:
1. Put on music and dim the lights, light a few candles (in a safe, out of the reach place of stumbling drunks).
2. If your music is playing off of your computer, you may as well clear your searches and erase your internet history...someone could decide to play DJ...just erase your history.
4. Put on something sparkly and pop some champagne.
I vacuum but skip washing the floors until after the party. I also like to roll up my rugs and store them in the bedroom as people will wear their shoes inside, which I don't mind since laminate flooring is easy to clean. A little dust on a mantle never killed anyone either.
Your tips are genius, especially that last one.
Oh, I love the VIP crew idea!! I'm stealing that because I'm always running around like a crazy person, yelling at my husband. :(
keltrue...a VIP crew works WONDERS. Usually just one or two extra people come an hour early, and it's so helpful to have extra sets of hands filling ice buckets, putting drinks out, etc. Plus if you get any early arrivals, your VIPs can entertain them while you finish up in the kitchen.
Another thing I do is decide which platters to use in advance, set them out on the table, and put a note on each one saying what it's for. Otherwise I waste a good fifteen minutes trying to remember what goes with what.
I'm stealing all of your ideas - thank you!!
The new LED candles give the same effect without the danger. Think I saw box of 4 on sale @ big box home store with 4 hour timers built in for $20 . Useful for gobs of parties and cheaper than ANY fire cleanup.
My mom use to say, "If you can't afford to throw a party, don't throw it". Which means no BYOB or BYOF. I take this meaning to the VIP crew as well. I certainly don't want to me invite to a party and be asked to 'help' out. It may be just me, but I didn't get all fancied up to help serve or clean. Same goes the other way around. NO ONE cleans up after a party I throw. I invite, you enjoy.
Great ideas. I've found that I have to set a "cut-off" time and simply complete whatever I'm doing and go with the flow from that time on. I can't tell you how many times I'm the only one at my party who hasn't showered or applied make-up because I was trying to "finish one more thing."
Lyon - the VIP crew means putting out a few plates, maybe helping in the kitchen a little, and greeting folks as they arrive and showing them where to put coats. Maybe my friends and I are just a pack of inbred mouth-breathing Neanderthals, but I consistently have volunteers for the VIP gig. I don't even have to ask them. Maybe it's because I'm so obviously grateful for their help, or maybe because they know how much work goes into throwing a party and want to pitch in, but it's never been a problem. I've noticed friends who are a little shy enjoy it, because it gives them something to do in that awkward first hour of a party.
I don't see a point in getting uptight about who does what, because we're all there to have a good time. And it's impossible to have a good time when the hosts are swamped. Your mileage may vary...but if you have such a big problem with it, I'd recommend not attending any parties in my home. The rest of y'all are welcome. :)
Comments are cracking me up. #3 is my favorite. I'm pretty sure I have yet to throw what I'd ever comfortably call a "successful party." Something always seems to go wrong. I should keep some of these tips handy for the future :)
I won't even bother reading the suggestion because the 30 minutes before guests arrive find me frantically scurrying around the house trying to finish everything that was supposed to be finished hours earlier and to get the damn meat in the oven.
Brilliant Guidelines! I especially love the ping pong balls in the medicine chest comment! Hysterical!
My own countdown checklist includes: start with an EMPTY dishwasher, a stack of clean dishtowels, a few hefty bags and more ice than you think you need.
I also always take out every serving dish and utensil that I will need for each course and lay them out on the kitchen table. Nothing is worse than trying to find coffee cups or that beautiful serving spoon you found in an antique shop after you've had a lot of wine with dinner! Make up a "coffee & dessert" tray beforehand, too. Someone will always ask if you have any sweet n low. In fact, load the coffee machine so that you only have to push the GO button.
Hire a teenager from the neighborhood to wash dishes. Money well spent.
And have fun! No one cares if the house is dusty. Likely your guests are thrilled to be out of their own dusty house!
The ping pong ball idea is hysterical.
I concur, I don't let my guests lift a finger - no clean up allowed. I do a bit before I go to bed and the rest in the morning. They are there to relax and enjoy themselves and I want to do the same when I go to their parties.
1. Quickly scan each room to check for anything that should be put away.
2. Empty the dish drainer. Bonus points if the dishwasher is empty too. Then you can chuck stuff in there all during the party/dinner.
3. Get the music ready.
4. Spritz on some perfume.
5. Have a drink.
Just as my first guests arrived at my last get together, a glass decoration fell off the mantle and shattered on the hearth. Talk about manically vacuuming while my husband distracted them outside . . . . . sheesh.
Love the ping pong balls. As a shy person I really enjoy helping out it gives me a chance to talk to people and give the host a break. One party I never left the kitchen, got to meet everyone, and talked to them through out the night and the kitchen was spotless when the party was wrapping up.
The ping pong balls are a funny idea, but this completely misses the point. Your guest could be looking in the medicine cabinet for something pretty innocent they may need desperately, like a tampon, and you just humiliated the hell out of them. Way to treat your friends.
Good tips - during winter, I always turn down the heat a few degrees before people come over; the temp in my small apartment usually skyrockets once it's crowded with people.
Out of curiosity, though, does anyone really spend weeks preparing for a house party? If I'm REALLY on top of things, I invite people the weekend prior.
I agree with adalaio. Guests can have legitimate reasons for looking in your medicine cabinet. Better to hide your sensitive items and put out the useful stuff (like Advil or stomach medicine) where those in urgent need can find it easily! If anybody snoops beyond that, you know, if they're so hard up for a thrill that they can only get it by finding out which feminine hygiene products I use, whatever.
Lock the kitties in a bedroom.
Unplug the digital piano; musician friends aren't going to start playing at a party without some discussion and coaxing first, and I don't want to hear any of the rest of your drunk asses banging on it. ;-)
This sounds very familiar... :)
Hahahahaa, that sounds like me!
I don't get the ping-pong balls. Why would you do something like that to your guests? If there are things you don't want them to see, hide them.
What on earth does "a killer theme" mean? I haven't been to a party with A Theme since I was ten. Name four Killer Themes. Explain.
Oh, good heavens. It's a party, which means it's supposed to be fun and people shouldn't take themselves seriously. I'm a very informal hostess by nature. Guests are taken care of, they have a wonderful time, but I don't put on airs or consider myself too perfect to ask a friend to refill the ice bucket when I'm busy with other tasks. Friends are there to look out for each other, not sit around like lumps waiting to be waited on. In my group, we're always asking hosts if we can come early to help set up, if we can bring anything, and if there's anything we can do during the party to pitch in.
I have yet to have anyone be offended, let alone "humiliated" by the ping pong balls and it's a prank I've pulled off and on for a decade. It's not about deliberately hurting anyone's feelings, it's about getting a laugh from the fact that everyone gets tempted to snoop. Once the balls all fall out, there's usually a sign that says "Gotcha!" or a small airplane bottle of liquor and a note saying "In case you need to steel yourself before going back out there." My friends all know I have an oddball sense of humor, and if they didn't like it, well, I wouldn't have very many guests at my parties, would I? As it is, I have an apartment full of people any time I open the doors.
I put the necessary things, like tampons, Advil, etc, somewhere obvious, plus guests tend to ask me if there is something specific that they need.
I mean, cheez. Between the "nobody lifts a finger because I am the Best Host Ever" and "I would just DIE of humiliation!" people, I wonder if some of you could put a lump of coal up your keisters and have a diamond fall out. It's a party, not the Spanish Inquisition.
If it´s too hot inside, why don´t you open the windows? It´s getting faster and it´s cheaper and better for the environment.
Best thing to do: tell yourself that it is going to be great! Then go doll yourself up! It's your party enjoy it!
Nice tips! I definitley need to crack windows when guests start showing up!
Nobody wants schweaty guests!
If I locked my kitties in a bedroom they would destroy the door and holler all night!
They love visitors! More hands for belly scratches! :)
@ ScannerJockey - LOL!!! I though that I was the only smarmy person posting around here! Thanks! I am NOT alone after all. I thought the ping pong balls idea was brilliant. And, if anyones guests are going to be uptight about getting caught with their hand in the medicine cabinet then they would get uptight about ones having invited the shy OCD friend who chooses to spend all night in the kitchen helping out. The uptight should never be invited anyway!!! So, yeah, most smart people put out a basket of "necessaries" which includes pads, bandaids, alka seltzer, clear nail polish for stocking runs, even a few make up cleaning wipes. And most smart guests ASK, discretely, if you have an extra nail file they could use for a chipped nail. (Incidentally, I save the little guest packs from hotels for this purpose. The ones that come with 3 Q-tips, mini file & mini cuticle stick). In all these comments however, even the ones suggesting LESS alcohol, no where have I read the suggestion that car keys should be requested BEFORE the heavy drinkers start in and there should be a cab company's number prominently posted. If one lives in a small enough town/city, like I do, you could even call ahead to give a heads up that yopu are having a party & ask how many cabs may be available that night. Trust me, this does work. I've done this & it's great to look outside around 10 pm & see a cab idling nearby. Maybe one couldn't expect this in LA or NYC, but it does happen! And it's a life saver. Literally. Remember, the host can be held liable if a drunk driving crash happens after the guest leaves your home. THAT is NOT a fun party favor to live with. Hope everyone has a fun & safe holiday party season!
I appreciate whoever mentioned emptying the trashcans, especially in the bathroom(s). God knows I don't want to look at used floss, clumps of hair, and whatever else is on top of a full can. Also, I have friends who keep their cats' litterpans in the bathroom/powder room and leave them full. There's something no one needs to be sitting and looking at!
Count me as pro the ping-pong ball idea, because I'm a looker and it would serve me right!
ecuadoriana - You know, I never really think about car keys because I live in DC and everyone just takes the Metro over. But I agree with you that it's smart to take keys.
One thing I also do is inflate and make up a couple of Aerobeds and put them in the bedroom. That way, if a guest is too tipsy to get home safely, I can just bring out a mattress and have them stay over. Much easier than fiddling with air pumps at two in the morning!
Also, I let my building's security guard know that I am having a party, and run down with a plate of treats at some point during the evening. It's a gracious gesture that wins points every time.
ScannerJockey- LOL! MY bad! At first when I read "inflate a couple..." my mind went- "Whoa! How come I'M never invited to Scanner's parties?", then I read the rest of the sentence. Hehehe! Yes, inflatable mattresses is a good idea (or even inflatable party dolls!) & of course, greasing the palms of neighbors & security guards is good insurance. Everyone should have a good time this year at all the End of the World parties! I think everyone should really go out with a bang- since there will be no day after hang overs to contend with! Right?! Happy Holiday Season everyone!
ScannerJockey- LOL! MY bad! At first when I read "inflate a couple..." my mind went- "Whoa! How come I'M never invited to Scanner's parties?", then I read the rest of the sentence. Hehehe! Yes, inflatable mattresses is a good idea (or even inflatable party dolls!) & of course, greasing the palms of neighbors & security guards is good insurance. Everyone should have a good time this year at all the End of the World parties! I think everyone should really go out with a bang- since there will be no day after hang overs to contend with! Right?! Happy Holiday Season everyone!
We have hosted large family sit-down dinners and usually hired a couple service people to assist. This year, with the economy and a couple family members looking for work, we decided to provide all the food, but not the service. My husband and I aren't extroverts, so we enlisted my extroverted brother to play our expediter (we're 50-60+). I would just say I need someone to put ice water in the glasses on the table, and two family members for a to plate a course. One person would build the shrimp salads and another the Caesar salad, and a third to take them around.
He loved pointing at a family member and saying "YOU!" ... report to your Aunt! Brother would assign tasks according to ability and age so that each person would be able to participate and help. It was fun and no one was asked to do anything out of their skill range or burdened with too many kitchen or serving chores. We had people set out courses, retrieve and clear dishes, take "orders" when we offered a selection of tamales (vegetarian, chicken, beef, pork). People filled water glasses, setup condiment bowls and chip bowls for the table, took orders, cleared plates and served courses, drinks, and dessert. Nieces, nephews, aunts and uncles rotated through the kitchen and dining room so we, as hosts, got to chat for a minute or two with each person while our hands were busy.
While we rotate hosting duties throughout the year at each others homes, and we often share out the dishes, this is one of the first times we've really had the "kids" help. I think it may become a tradition. For the past few years, my husband has also asked (a week or two ahead) one of the nieces or nephews to stand and share a welcome greeting. He's preparing them for the future of giving toasts and it's lovely to hear their thoughts and insights. Happy Holidays!