
We are hosting Thanksgiving dinner at our home this year, for the first time. My family hasn't got a traditional dining style beyond simply gathering together, so I'm busy contemplating the logistics of such an event in our home! Do we have a sit down dinner? Or go buffet style?

I recently helped put on a baby shower for a close friend, and we opted for a buffet style event. (Even though we've seen record breaking heat this summer in Austin, I know we won't be having a garden party for Thanksgiving — the photos above are from the shower!) When I think about buffet style, I typically imagine a scenario that yearns for more formality and elegance. However, my friends ended up orchestrating a buffet dinner that was full of both.
This got me thinking about the pros and cons of each style of dining: sit down dinners vs. buffet. I've tried to outline the advantages and disadvantages of each, but please feel free to chime in with things I may have overlooked — I am still undecided about which approach to take for our holiday dinner!
Buffet Pros/Sit Down Cons:
- With a buffet, your table may be set without leaving the necessary room for serving dishes and platters, as you would need for a sit down dinner. This means more room for centerpieces and decorative dinner and glassware.
- There is no need to figure out which way to pass serving dishes if you opt for a buffet. There is so often a bit of confusion about direction when food begins to get passed around, and somehow, I never seem to get the mashed potatoes! (As a sidebar on this one, I actually take a great deal of pleasure in the bustling that goes on at a dinner table, so it's not entirely fair that I call this a sit down con...I'll leave it to you to decide!)
- At a sit down dinner, those who have difficulty holding large serving dishes sometimes have some trouble passing. At a buffet, it is much easier to negotiate serving, or find someone to help out.
- If you opt for a "serious" buffet, chafing dishes and warmers may be used to keep food the proper temperature. Dishes left on the table will inevitably cool.
- You have the opportunity to embellish your buffet table as well as your dining table. Some of us take any opportunity to arrange and decorate, although if you consider this more of a burden, go ahead and move it to the other list!
Sit Down Pros/Buffet Cons:
- If you haven't got spare room, setting up an entirely separate table or sideboard for a buffet may not be an option. Sit down dining may be the best option, spatially.
- There is an air of formality to a sit down dinner. The pomp and circumstance of such an event can really add to the specialness of an occasion. Even though I noted that our aforementioned buffet party still retained a lovely formality, sit down dinners can be more solemn and intimate events---which many people prefer for the holidays.
- At a sit down dinner, although food will take a moment to pass completely around a table, everyone begins serving at the same time. A buffet requires a line, or at least a modicum of "taking ones turn" that tends to be a little less hospitable.
- When going for seconds at a buffet, it is much more obvious than at a sit down dinner! Never mind thirds or fourths...
- Folks will have chosen their seats at a sit down dinner prior to holding a plate full of food. Unless the seats are assigned, of course. This prevents the search for your place at the table with your dinner in your hands!
I'm sure I've missed something---what do you think about buffet vs. sit down? For my family, it truly is all about being together for the holiday. I'm just trying to set myself up as much as possible for a successful event!
Images: Jessica Blake Tata

Nomade Express Slee...
I'm all about the sitdown dinner. If you've got the room for everyone at the table, sit-down dinners create such a better, shared experience. And passing plates and serving is a great conversation starter. I would only do buffet if everyone can't be at the same table. and in THAT case, get everyone an inexpensive bamboo tray to eat on. Makes eating out of your lap, balancing wine and silverware so much easier. Pier One has them but I see them all the time at thrift stores usually for $1 or less: http://www.pier1.com/Catalog/Dining/tabid/977/CategoryId/114/ProductId/1571/ProductName/Natural-Bamboo-Tray/Default.aspx
and while you're at it: pick up a bunch of these d ishtowels from ikea -- nice and big, to cover your entire lap (especially important when eating on the couch) -- just 79 cents each, and reusable: http://www.ikea.com/us/en/catalog/products/10100909/
pamh
howtorunyourlife.blogspot.com
Why can't you do the sit-down-buffet thing? We always lay out the food on whatever kitchen peninsula is closest and then we all sit down together. No need to balance plates with all that gravy, and no need to worry about food getting cold and overcrowding the table.
Thanksgiving is a very formal/special time for me, so I could never do a buffet. It works well for a baby shower, but you can't beat sitting around the table, eating and drinking all at the same time.
We always do the buffet-style! I have a huge family on both sides, so we always end up at several different tables anyway, making a sit-down an inconvenient option because of all the platters involved. (We're still at the "kids table" haha)
My grandma does always leave baskets of rolls on each table though... she knows us too well :)
Thanksgiving is my family's favorite holiday and we all love cooking so our dinner is a big deal for us. But we definitely don't look like that Norman Rockwell painting. We put a few dishes on the table (rolls, cranberry sauce, gravy) but since we have to do multiple tables to accommodate our whole family, buffet-style is just the only thing that works. And we carve the turkey before dinner starts. I know, the horror.
Oh and like threeacres, we all go through the buffet then all sit down together. It's not just people standing around with plates all night :)
sit down or buffet with sit down table nearby.
I prefer buffet. I set a beautiful table and I also set up a beautiful food area. I admit that we have a lot of space now but found that in our first teeny tiny home; it was easier there too. I think that it's really down to personal taste though because even our wedding was cocktail style so I'm obviously not a big fan of formality. I think you should do whatever is easier for you to do. :)
My family is way too big for a "sit down" holiday meal. Casual buffet dining doesn't make the time any less special. After all, it's the company that's the most important part of the experience.
Depends on the people you have around.
Buffet is informal but you get foot traffic. I don't like eating with a plate on my lap though.
Either one is great as long as the food is good, tables are pretty, and no one talks about politics or religion...
My grandparents figured this all out: they had a large Lazy Susan table. You just had to make sure not to leave a spoon hanging over the edge of a dish because it would knock over glasses as the food spun around.
When my aunt hosts Thanksgiving dinner for the entire family, she sets up various tables in the open livingroom/dining room space. There's a large table (her dining table) and several satellite table (folding tables that she keeps in a rental storage space). Dinner is plated in the kitchen and each person brings their own plate to their table. We'll all have dinner once everyone is seated.
Each table's got like 1 or 2 conversations going on. Someone from one table is listening in on another's table conversation and then shouting across the space ensues as everyone tries to communicate with each other. Music's playing in the background. It's soo much fun! I love it!
I think you may be overthinking this a bit. Save some energy for worrying about how to have turkey and side dishes ready at the same time. :)
We always always do sit down. It's thanksgiving and we always make room for everyone even if we have to drag tables together and squeeze close. We fit everything including the Turkey on the table but usually some things like drinks and salad & first course plates get put on a sideboard or the counter eventually.
I guess my family is odd. We do a buffet line in the kitchen and progress to dining room table to eat together. As others have said, weaker/older hands can't pass dishes safely. So why put those folks on the spot passing hot heavy serving dishes? I have waited excessive time to coax someone to pass the ____ dish while they are having a lively conversion with someone else. Throw in hearing issues and it's far easier to leave the table for a refill in the kitchen and return.
Picture a very large family which can't always fit at a massive table together. When that happens, satellite tables are scattered around, but everyone still moves through the buffet line and has a chair and table to dine on.
Looks like some commenters have only the buffet line and not the table or tables for sitting down.
I think we are all talking about 3 different options. There is the buffet where people help themselves and sit around the room but aren't eating together at a table; the buffet where you serve yourself but everyone sits together at the table or tables; the sit down where you sit at the table or tables and pass the food. I prefer the second option. I don't have room on my table(s) for all the Thanksgiving food although there is the line up at the start of the meal. But it is easier to get seconds and you can keep things warm with warming trays and such.
I think the type of food traditionally eaten for Thanksgiving doesn't lend itself well to buffet-style, which suits more finger-foods, mezze and things that don't require knife AND fork. If you have the table space, it would be nicer to have a sit-down meal. Buffet meals always feel rushed.
I agree with zanzibar. I prefer a buffet line which leads to everyone sitting down at the same one or two tables (oh how I miss the kids table!) This is almost always how we do it it my family, but we have never been extremely formal.
An added bonus is that clean up seems to be easier with the buffet in the kitchen.
We change it up year to year. Depends on the mood and how many people are over! But one thing is certain- we always always sit around the table together to eat regardless of where to food is stationed! One year we even got really crazy and did a brunch buffet and sit down dinner ;-)