apartment therapy changing the world, one room at a time

I hope you have taken down the hanging purse, cuz I'm sure your man isn't too thrilled with THAT. ;)

Seriously, though, you just need "grown up" furniture for the computer area.

But also, if you "let him take over the loft" I wouldn't make any grand plan for stickers or anything else for that matter without involving him in the decision...

If you truly "let him take over the loft", then let him do it completely. Not everyone needs a beautifully designed workspace; and by the looks of it, neither a beautifully designed home overall. Just keep things clean, shoes and purses where they should be and hopefully that'll take enough time off your hands to leave your husband alone.

If you can I would look for a desk or create a desk skirt (you could use nuetral solid factor so it isn't girly) to hide the wires etc underneath the table/desk you have now. Paint would probably make a huge difference as would slip colors on everything. For accent pieces or a new lamp I would check out thrift stores, craigslist, ebay, and freecycle. It's amazing what you can find at a really great price. You and your man also need to find some kind of common color scheme so that the whole apartment looks pulled together instead of drastically different in different areas. I would definitely add some art work on the walls and plants. Plants add visual interest and improve the indoor air quality.

N.

http://badhuman.wordpress.com

Since this is about design advice, I have to admit that I'm having a hard time thinking of a re-design for the upstairs loft space while that over-sized light grey leather furniture is still downstairs. I'm sure it's comfortable to sit on, but certainly not easy on the eyes. Best quick fix in my opinion for both upstairs and down is probably getting some art or decorations of some kind on the walls - bring the eye elsewhere. Will probably make the red wall seem more finished too. You can fill in a large wall with a series of small pieces all framed similarly, keeping it affordable.

Room and Board has some great cord management systems that you can stick on the back of the desk and leg to feed the cords down. Twist ties and clear zip strap things work well too.

Having covered storage helps too- I see that most of the papers and stuff is on display, so if you get boxes, files or a desk with some closed cabinets or drawers I think that will help a lot. Ikea has some really well-priced boxes and files that would work. Having office things match I think helps! I found this out through getting our home ready for an open house.

An easy fix for the futon would be a new slipcover to make it feel fresh. I think light blue looks great with red, and it might "lighten up" that big red wall.

Also, since I know your pain/frustration with compromising a space with a loved one, I think that if you have an idea for a new colour, wall vinyl, a lamp or something, casually show them a staged picture from a website or a magazine to illustrate how "good" it looks and make sure they're in a particularly good mood. ;)

This looks like another situation where communication issues are reflected in design & space issues. Your phrasing does yield some clues - you've "taken over" the main level in organic greens, browns, and creams, and you "*sort of* let him take over the loft" but now it seems like you want to rescind that by painting a blue-green accent wall, which is a very different feel from the red and black that he "just loves." So the first issue seems that you two like very different color combinations. In the space you have, you either have to have enough separation between spaces (e.g., door that shuts) so that you can have different looks in different rooms (and really let one person take the lead in each room), or you have to come up with a unified look that truly satisfies & reflects both of you. Otherwise, your place will look perennially unfinished no matter what you try to do with it. Another clue is the tag that red & black are "reminiscent of his room back home"; maybe you think if he brings those colors in more, it will mean he hasn't really left home or something along those lines. Between your purse hanging over the space and his wires all over the place, looks like there's stuff that's not being said - and not being heard. Try some of exercises from the early weeks of the Cure, or take turns listening to each other talk about the space without interruption from the other before you start painting & buying stuff. Good luck and check back in.

I like the purse hanging from the stairs. It has a very "on the go" "That Girl!" vibe going on with it.

As for the loft, oh, just let him do whatever he wants as long as he's "taking care of business."

Bossy, much? I'm glad I'm not him. It's not your house, it's BOTH of yours. learn to talk and sacrifice some things. Allow him to express himself in the space that you say is primarily his. Allow him to have a say instead of taking over with your "organic" colors.

By the way, red and black is awesome.

2 things, get some art get some not seafoam colored furniture that a guy could deal with...

p.s. seems like people are jumping all over her about being bossy etc., (and possibly picking up latent anger in living their situation by the higher-than-usual snide quotient in the comments) but he's got a role in this too - in couple dynamics, if one partner is dominating, the other can be underfunctioning and passive to an equal extent.

The loft isn't the problem (aside from the cords) - the living room is. I don't see any color. The grey sofas, beige carpet and off white walls and blinds make the place look cold and bland.

I'd get to work on that space first with some vibrant paint, colorful curtains at the window, a mantle over your fireplace and some artwork - then you can help him work on 'his' loft.

Remember, this is no longer your (singular) space, it's your(plural) space. If you can't find ways to communicate and compromise on decor, how can you expect to communicate and compromise on the more important things in your lives?

Congrats on your first place!

Bringing the red downstairs would give you a more cohesive look. You are already working with a very neutral palette, so you could add quite a bit of color with pillows, art, throws, and a rug. Good luck.

Hey everybody! Your comments have all been great. The pictures of the apartment are very messy, I know, it is usually very clean..but we were in the process of moving in at that time. Next time I will put up some better pictures. But all of the 'stuff' has its place now :)

As far as the bossy comments go... I meant 'let him take over' in a way where he is busy a lot, so I let him have all of the opinions on the upstairs so it is mostly 'his space'.. but he never initializes any ideas so I am trying to make the office space cohesive and it is coming together pretty well.


Thank you to "canadian in swedish clothing" for the office ideas! I am in the process of getting a futon cover with some funky pillows, we organized the desk and wires with some tubes and zip ties. I will definitely have to find some cool matching organziers for the makeshift desk. That is a great idea! I am definitely going to switch out the lampshade (at least) as well.

I agree red and black are awesome, our kitchen dishes are red and black and white. It seems like the gifts we received were on two separate color schemes so we are trying to make do with what we have! So to kind of tie in the reds through the rest of the apartment, we put up a beautiful Gustav Klimt print above the mantle that is mostly my 'organic' colors, with some candles and a wooden vase with some bright red colored flowers in it. In the dining room, more green has been introduced with some table napkins, and a wooden hanging mirror on a previously blank wall from Pier 1.

The oversized bone-gray leather furniture was a gift from my uncle, so no expense was paid in receiving it. I guess its just a bad picture, because it warms up the VERY open space nicely. Anyway! Chocolate loop curtains were put up and now we are just looking for something for that darned wall. Oh, and I typically do not hang my purse up on the staircase. :)

I guess next time I will put up some better pictures!!! Thanks again!

PS, thanks to Karen H too! I appreciate your view of psychology in design!

I forgot to say also that we have added some plants as well. Great idea to keep things relaxing and fresh at the same time, as well as tying in different color schemes from different rooms!

Thanks again!

Glad to help. Would love to see pix with the additions you mention in your posts. Design therapy is a fun break from cancer therapy, which is what I do when I'm not browsing catalogs... best wishes, k

I have to agree with the other posters -- you two need to communicate.

If the loft is the only space he gets to decorate, and it's his exclusively, then he's going to spend all his time upstairs and you're going to spend all your time downstairs. Not a fun combination.

If you decorate together, then you can both share both spaces.


Get some paintings or posters up on the walls, and maybe also some plants. This doesn't have to be expensive, but keep in mind that you need to agree on things as a partnership.

The rule my wife and I have is that we don't buy (or do) any big things where only one of us loves it. We both have to love it, or we don't buy/do it. And that includes price -- we'll ask not only "Do you love it?" but also "Do you love it at that price?"

And you have to give honest answers -- we made a very costly mistake early in our life together where we both thought the other person was well and truly in love with something, so we said we were in love with it, hoping to please them. Big mistake.

There have been several times when my wife really loved something and I would have loved it if the price had been about 1/10th what I saw on the tag. And we didn't buy/do it. She was disappointed, but overall she's much happier when we buy/do only those things we both love -- and at that price.

On smaller things, I'll usually agree even if I don't completely love it, so long as I do at least like it and feel like it's something I could live with for several years.

And we do have a limit that we set on things we'll buy when we're out on our own. Otherwise, we don't buy them without consulting with the other person. And no cheating doing several separate transactions just to get around the per-transaction limit.


On the wires, lifehacker.com has some good guides on how to hide your wires and make things look much better. Just don't use plastic zip ties -- use velcro straps instead. And label all your cables, at both ends.

Get a rollsign for that big wall over the couch! They look great and take up a lot of space. Usually they're pretty long so you can not only cut it to size, but you'll have enough leftover to hang another elsewhere or, if it's narrow, two side by side.

considering the downstairs, your guy sounds like he has the better ideas. Instead of trying to impose your taste on his space, work with him to create his space. try bringing some of his love of real colour into your living room and work on getting better organized overall.

If you're living with a significant other, the best thing for your relationship is to give each other an area of the house that belongs to just you. If you're going to let him have the loft, then do it completely and let him decide on any design ideas. (Although investing in wireless equipment might not be a bad idea). You should spend your focus on your area- and definately consider selling those leather couches!