We have company living with us the entire month of December. We live so far that when people come they come for a long time. I think something that is helpful is to let go of the idea of perfection. Try and plan and organize as much as you can, then when they get there let go and relax. It only makes the situation worse when you have big expectations and things don't go as you hoped.

Make breakfast a sit down affair each day. It becomes like a family meeting where you can discuss the plans for the day. And it lets whoever is sleeping on the couch know that it's time to get up and restore order to the living room.

Try not to be a "host" but a housemate -- your guests don't need a chaperon. As such you can do things like create a list of house guidance (as opposed to rules) that help everyone keep their sanity. Guests want to be helpful, but they don't know what is an infringement on your privacy/routine and what isn't. By creating a list like this, you like your guests know that they can feel at home while contributing like it's home!

For example:

1. Help yourself to meals -- but please reserve the lemon curd for Jane's morning toast. [subtext -- finish my curd and your toast!]
2. All dishes, knives, and utensils are dishwasher safe -- but the Calphalon plans and Kaiser bakeware are handwash only. Drying towels are in the pantry. [Subtext -- clean up the kitchen after use]
3. The washing-machine is HE -- please follow the directions on the laundry soap bottle for HE washers. [Subtext -- do your own laundry]
4. The dog is on a diet -- no treats, including human food or cat food!!
5. Joe has to be at work by 9:00, so he's showering and getting ready for work between 7:30 and 8:15. [the person who needs to be at work gets to reserve the bathroom & hot water!]

Friendly, helpful, welcoming. And you don't have to be a Den Mother

I am not sure which individual's people are letting stay at their homes for days and days at a time, but I am going to assume it is family. These are people that have either raised you, grew up with you, or have been in your life forever so the "host" should pretty much know how to deal with these people. For example, I can tell any of my family members anything straight and to the point. On the other hand you do want people to enjoy themselves and, if you are like me, want people to have the best experience staying in your home. So I say have lots of food and some menu ideas. Plan out some activities and be open to suggestions. Take off work if possible. But remember, it's family so speak up when necessary and let them be honest with you if you become too territorial. Finally prepare yourself mentally ahead of time. If it's a mother-in law that always has a little something irritating to say, know that is what is going to happen, except it and just laugh it off.

I have to remind myself to ignore the clutter -- constantly tidying makes my guests feel unwelcome! Anyone who stays with me for a long visit is already at home enough in my house to help themselves to whatever they need. The most important thing is to remember to provide a list of house quirks (you have to slam the back door to get it to lock) and the wifi password.

Plan everything ahead of time - especially meals. Grocery shop and cook as much as you can ahead of time. Make schedules - what to do each day, opening times, driving instructions etc. Make sure all your shopping and cooking and anything else is completed ahead of time. Dig out and post the guest password for your wifi.

Then, give it all up and just enjoy the chaos. What happens, happens. Nothing is more important than spending time with people you love.

Except for the part about the guest password. That's actually important, if you are in my family.

Have a table set with a home cooked meal or delicious nibbles for when your guests arrive. Thereafter, if your guests want to share with cooking and chores (mine always do), let them have free rein in your kitchen, and show them how all your appliances work. It's much more relaxing and convivial, and puts people at ease.

We tend to have guests fairly often, and it's not uncommon for visits to last several days, or to include several guests at once. I've learned that being upfront about household needs and requirements makes things go much more smoothly.

I tend to feel that if I know you well enough to have you in my home for days on end, then I know you well enough to put you to work. There are some exceptions to that rule, of course, but it does apply to family and family gatherings.

~ I post meal plans and times, including which meals are "on your own" or don't have a set time. If there is a large group, I include a sign up sheet for kitchen duty - including prep, setting the table and clean up (as needed).

~ I also make it very clear that there are plenty of snacks and munchies available and that folks are welcome to help themselves (and clean up after themselves) if they want something. I clearly label all "meal plan" foods.

~ I make sure each guest is given a towel, hand towel and washcloth, as well as clear information about showers and hot water. Those who have a schedule to keep get priority access to showers/hot water.

~ If guests are staying several days, they're given a cloth laundry sack for dirty cloths. Our washer and dryer are super easy to use, and we keep all supplies in clearly labeled bins in the laundry room.

~ I accept a certain amount of clutter will happen when there is a crowd, and I quickly learn who is good about wanting to help pick up/tidy up and will happily call on them to help give a quick, 5 minute pick up as needed.

~ I let my dishes sit. Dishes can wait, guests cannot. Meals are cleared and dishes rinsed and stacked and then left for a while. That way, everyone can be sociable and relax for a bit and not feel like they're missing out on anything. Later, as things settle down, it's easy to slip off to the kitchen to do the clean up.

~ I put together information about our neighborhood, a simple map with landmarks, address and phone number for several local attractions and restaurants as well as the website for buses and trolleys as well as numbers for cab companies. If we have time, we work to schedule mutually chosen activities; if we don't, then our guests have all the info they need to manage on their own.

~ Folks staying in the living room have plenty of space to keep luggage and bags neatly in the hallway (big hall), or in one corner of the living room. I do ask that air mattresses are either pushed completely to one end of the room, stored on their side in the back hall or deflated during the day so the main room is usable for everyone. But we usually try to accommodate everyone in bedrooms, even if it means doubling up and putting air mattresses in the bedrooms.

~ We make the effort ahead of time to ensure there is extra space for guests. The hall closet has room for coats. The big hall has room for suitcases. The bedrooms have space in their closets and there are shelves with empty baskets to hold incidentals.

~ I keep the under-sink cabinets in our bathrooms essentially empty of daily stuff. There is a basket with extra TP and soap, and then there are small baskets to help guests corral their belongings.

And the biggest thing we do? We love having company, and we accept that it means some level of sacrifice and inconvenience. We've tailored our home to make it as easy as possible to have guests, and we enjoy having a full house.

Decide and announce organized meals and when guests will be on their own. Assign tasks. I just ask someone to go collect all the towels and start the laundry, or scrape a mess of carrots for the week, or would you mind walking the dog? After the first request everyone relaxes and pitches in. Thanks niece Annie for unloading the dishwasher and buying the orange juice!

Don't forget to take a little time for yourself each day, as needed. I need time to myself, so if I have guests (or am a guest somewhere), I tend to get a bit cranky (my husband would debate the actual amount defined by "a bit") if I miss that crucial alone time. I realized that it's OK to say "I'm going to rest for a little while" and give myself 30 minutes to be in my own head, in my own space. It definitely helps keeping Ms. Crankypants away!

Great suggestions, all!

When I have guests, it's not the meal times that wear me out--it's constantly dispensing drinks to everyone who wants water, coffee, soda, juice, wine--and keeping glasses and cups clean! I get mini cans and bottles of beverages ahead of time so everyone can help themselves without dirtying glassware--and I put someone else in charge of the coffeemaker.

And one thing that helps everyone's mood (especially toward the end of a long visit), is to plan a walk every day, weather permitting. If the weather is lousy, get out the board games!