I think the only way to get around this is by avoiding hotels! The best plan is to go somewhere where you can rent a house/condo; ie a cottage at the beach, for example. This springs to mind since I live in the Northeast where beach/lake vacations don't require a plane ticket. A rented vacation house also has a decent likelihood of having a deck/patio or other outdoor space where you guys could grill, chill, have drinks etc after the little one is asleep.

Have you considered a cruise? Some cruiselines offer inroom babysitters so that you can go out in the evening. the first commenters idea about renting a house/condo is a good idea too.

We've traveled with our son since he was 8 months old, and we've learned to let our son set the pace of our vacation.

Our son takes very late naps when we travel (probably because he's so excited about all the new things he is experiencing... it's harder for him to wind down). We were just in Montreal for a week, and our (now 2-1/2 year old) napped so late (usually waking up right before dinner) that he often stayed awake until 10 or 11 PM. We were able to do lots of evening activities (like the Montreal Jazz Festival). He also tended to sleep in until 9 or 10 AM, which was an added bonus!!

Well, we always made sure that we rented a hotel room with a nice flat screen and decent cable, and got caught up on the shows that we never have time to watch!

Every time we've traveled with my daughter (who also goes to sleep at 7) we have had a hotel with a balcony. We love to read so we sit out back and talk and read. Its fun! Good luck! :)

Visit somewhere where the time zone is 2 or 3 hours ahead! When my son was 8 months old, we visited family that lived in a time zone 2 hours behind ours. My son went to bed early, and was up at 3 am... ugh.

My kids have always had extremely strict 7 pm bedtimes, but I've been suprised at how well they have adapted on vacations. They will survive staying up a bit later (8? 9?) and sleep in a bit later in the morning. (Or not. My kids never sleep in.)

Don't pack your vacation completely full. Plan time to go back to the hotel to nap, or even to just lay in bed and watch TV. Go to fun places in the evenings that will keep your kids happy and occupied. Even a sleepy 2 year old won't mind staying up a bit later if they are swimming or playing at an amusement park.

We usually try to stay at suite hotels so the kids sleep in one room and we can hang out in the next room. Other times we travel with family and get adjoining rooms to hang out next door. A monitor also works up to a few rooms down.

I totally agree with Homesweet! My family lives on the other (east) side of the country and every time we visit I panic about nap times and late sleeping times because I know my family will want to spend time with him and keep him up. Amazingly-it all works out-I just keep him on his normal "home" hours!

When my son was 8 months we did a weekend trip to Seattle and stayed in a hotel...we put him in the big bathroom with his noise machine to sleep. That was a funny adventure-we'd have to pee before his bedtime! But it worked out well-we took turns going down into the city/mall and doing things we like (my hubby shopped for video games etc or watched movies I wouldn't like in the room, while I shopped and drank Starbucks and people watched).

Two words: suite hotel (i.e. Embassy Suites type). Its made a huge difference for us. We've also improvised in non-suite hotels when our (now 2 yr old) daughter was younger by putting the pack and play in the bathroom, or even a little luggage nook. At least that way, you and your sig other can have the lights on/talk/watch TV etc. But yeah, traveling with a kid ain't like the old days ...

Ditto the suite hotels. You still end up spending the evening at the hotel, but you don't have to go to bed early yourself unless you want to!

I agree with BambiJo -- your 2yo may surprise you. My allegedly "crib-only" sleepers ended up being quite adaptable on vacations (i.e. sleeping in a stroller or baby carrier) and even if they didn't sleep until 9pm (or 11pm!) or so, they most certainly made up for it during an afternoon nap the next day.

Vacations are overstimulating no matter what, so I've found it's nearly impossible to keep a schedule that's so similar to home. Make sure to ENJOY your vacation, even at the expense of a few lost hours of sleep :)

Always bring another couple! You can switch going out every other night.

Let's see:

- suites are always nice or adjoining rooms. Even partial suites.
- we also like rooms that open to a garden courtyard and take the monitor on the balcony or the pool.
- houses are always nice too. We find them on VRBO.com
- bring your own babysitter. When DS was very small we took my MIL to Curacao so DH and I could go diving.

I know this isn't an option for everyone but we always ask my mom to join us (we have even paid for her flight or hotel room on occasion)--she gets a vacation and is always more than happy to babysit for us while we go sightseeing, etc. My brother and sister-in-law paid to take a teenage neice on a recent trip to Florida for the same purpose.

Depending on where you go, maybe try and find some activities that you can take advantage of early in the day. A special breakfast spot, earlier park concerts or farmers markets can let you spend the time your little one is awake to the fullest. Then in the evening, you wouldn't feel like the day is ending so soon.

What, you mean hunkering down with your laptop and headphones in the bathroom doesn't sound like vacation to you?

I've been there. I hope you find some great solutions... Now I'm off to see what suite-style hotels exist between our state (NC) and my parents' (KS) because I just can't do the bathroom thing anymore.

-Abby

Rental house, apartment, or hotel suite with at least one bedroom. Of course it's more expensive, but you plan for that, and it's worth it because you can move around and do things after your child is asleep. Worth the extra cost. Don't be afraid.

This was hard for us, too! Here were the tricks for us:
* our daughter was surprisingly flexible on vacations, especially that young. Just go for it! But make sure you don't have high expectations for your first one -- let your child surprise you.
* don't go with single friends, or to visit them -- it never really worked out for us. My friends just didn't get the baby routine, and even though they're awesome, I hated feeling like I was dragging them down by having a child who needed to eat/sleep/chill out.
* don't plan things that must happen at certain times (plays, dinners, etc). Go when it feels right, have snacks and backup plans.
* the suites were really important to us, too -- having a space where we didn't have to tiptoe and keep the lights off helped us feel like it was a vacation.

Good luck! You'll have a great time!

Suite hotel! Whenever we travel with our kiddos (who both goto bed around 7) we specifically pick the hotels with suites, even the low to mid-range priced hotels now offer these, you might be surprised how many offer this option. It may cost a bit more but is usually much less then 2 rooms connected and you have the piece of mind of having your 2 year old close by while not having to go to sleep yourselves at 7. Also consider a travel crib (we use Graco, same one for years) as well as bringing along his/her favorite sleep buddy (teddy bear?). Also we utilize the same sound machine (set low) when we travel as we do when home. Any continuity you can bring with you while traveling will pay off in better rest and an actual vacation for your entire family!

When I was a teenager some friend of our family took me on several vacations with them. I got to do whatever during certain hours and they got free babysitting during times of their designation.
And while I can't imagine it being financially fees-able for us to do in the next few years. I think it could work out well for some.

I agree with everyone else--suite hotel! it really does make it easier. you put the baby down at her regular time and then hang out in main room.

definitely agree with all the above...

get a 1 bedroom suite with a small kitchenette, pull-out couch and a balcony on the beach (doesn't have to be ocean view if trying to save $$). when you arrive at your destination go out and buy some breakfast foods, drinks, "adult" dessert or appetizers, and some kid friendly snacks. have a big family breakfast each morning on the balcony. then go for a long walk on the beach. come back for the nap and then head out in the afternoon for a little sightseeing and a late lunch/early dinner at a casual but yummy looking restaurant. come back early to do your regular bedtime routine. give the baby the bedroom and put him down at the regular time. you & the hubby can enjoy the wonderful beach breezes with a lovely dessert and some wine. maybe bring a deck of cards, order a movie, or play some dominoes. sleep on the pull-out couch. i promise, it's ALMOST like a second honeymoon ;)

happy vacation!!!

While playing Scrabble in the hotel bathroom has its charms, it can get a little old after a while. One trick that worked well for us when our son was a baby was to seek out drive-in theaters--he fell asleep in the car seat, we got to see a movie, and everyone was happy. Now that he's a toddler, I'm not sure it will work as effectively--he's more likely to be distracted and hyped up by the action on the screen--but we may give it a shot, anyway.
Another tip: book a babysitter for a night soon after you return from your trip, so that you can have a vacation from your vacation.

We were in a suite hotel and our little guy slept in a PeaPod tent in the kitchen (under the bar-height countertop). Still trapped in there, though.

BUT the absolute best is going on vacation with another family (whether it's a relative or friend---it just has to be someone you like!), and swapping kid duty on different nights so each couple can go out alone.

These are all good suggestions. Its so important to get couple time alone on vacations! I think renting a house or condo sounds like the best idea. My husband and I are lucky that we have parents that both live in relatively touristy places (ie. arizona and new england) where we can stay with family, do fun things during the day, and have built in babysitters at night. Just make sure you get out!

i have to agree with whoever mentioned getting a condo or house rental. we use vrbo.com for all of our trips now and it is SO much better then staying in a hotel! often it's cheaper as well.

we just got back from a 4 day vacation in san francisco and we rented a 1 bedroom apartment for $150/night in the marina district. they even had 2 pack and plays for us to use for our 8month old and 2.5 year old. we feel so much more a part of the city of community we are visiting this way also and it gives us so much more flexiblity for meals, sleeping, etc.

What I love about holidays is that our routine can go out the window upon arrival, but once home everyone easily goes back to it.

We waited a long time to do the "not with family" trip, and were pleasantly surprised.
Allowing your kids to set the pace is definitely a way to cut stress, but often giving in to very late bedtimes can be terrible so beware!!
We worried about sharing hotel rooms with them, and where possible tried to get one/two-bedroom apartments. We have never had complete quiet while our kids sleep, because I feel it's important they learn to sleep with noise, but at the same time we don't have a TV playing close to where they are sleeping.

Magazines, books, interesting articles etc are all good to take, and are nice quiet activities for when kids are sleeping. Often we have found we are so tired after a day's sightseeing that we pretty much follow the kids to bed.

These days on hols we watch a movie each night altogether (always a movie they haven't seen), and then all go to bed at the same time, but usually a little later than the kids normal bedtime and a little earlier than ours.

We also buy drawing/art activities and give them to the kids once we arrive, which is a great, calm way to spend an evening. Another success (although this was a one-time thing only) was when we did a driving holiday, and my husband bought a train set on the way there (sigh!) and the kids were obsessed with it for the WHOLE holiday. It occupied much time indeed!

We, too, went the hotel suite route. Usually just a one bedroom where we'd set up the pack n play and then we'd hang out in the living room. We found the prices were quite reasonable and worth the extra 10-20 dollars a night. It's worth becoming a AAA member for pretty decent discounts. Our vacation this year was so much more enjoyable. And often these suites have a refrigerator, which was handy for milk, snacks and libations.

Besides renting a suite or a room with a balcony, we have alternated who stays in with our son, so that one of us can go out and do something while the other had a night in watching tv or catching up on reading. However's out just has to be really quite coming in.

Some hotels have family suites. I haven't tried it myself, but I have friends who've had good experiences with it. You're still stuck in the hotel room, but at least you don't have to be quiet in the dark so your child stays asleep. :)

We've been known to put the pak n play in the closet or even in the bathroom. To be able to shut the door makes all the difference.

We've also spent hours pushing a stroller up and down the hall in the middle of the night so the baby wouldn't cry and wake up the other hotel guests. We just have a kid who won't go to sleep if mom or dad is in his sight line.

Bring a sitter. Or stay with friends.

I have to third the suite hotel. It's the way to go if you can afford it. Also, and this is a little off-topic, but we found that a roll of masking tape and some popsicle sticks is a great and cheap way of entertaining the kids during travel. Enjoy your vacation!

phew honeyhaze... how we'd love the money to buy airfares, a hotel room, food, transport and pay the wages of a sitter every holiday. Not every family can afford this. And not every friend is willing to play host to friends and their offspring... especially childless friends. You must have a very easy life indeed.

Since our kid is not good about sleeping in new places/is a very light sleeper and we were on a very tight budget since J was born, we have not done much traveling. When we have tried it has usually been a sleeping disaster. I know it would have been much better if we could have afforded suites/rented apartments and airfare, etc. We keep the adventures small and know that things will loosen up eventually.

Strongly second the condo option--just back from a week in Maui with a 7 month old. Putting him in the bedroom while we hung out in the living room and porch made ALL the difference! (And the kitchen made daytime MUCH easier, though we mostly went out to dinner.)

Suites! And true suites. Call the hotel to ensure that the suite actually has a separate bedroom with a door. Some snarky hotels advertise a suite, but really mean one room with a bed and kitchenette in the same room (like an efficiency apartment.) You can usually get a roll-away, pac-n-play, or sleeping bag for 1 or 2 kids in the bedroom around the bed for the grown-ups. I know this usually costs a little more (not always), but it is well worth the extra cost. If you can't afford the 7 nights in a suite, cut your vacation to the 5 nights you can afford. Truly, this is the best way to go. We have a 2 & 5 year old, and would not sleep in a hotel unless it was a suite.

Each summer my mom, sister and I go to the beach together. Now that I have a daughter, she joins us. We got for a few nights and each night one of us has baby detail. Two of us get to stay out late, one stays in and watches baby. We choose a hotel room that is right across from the sun deck so the baby monitor reaches that far so that person can sit out there, or stay in the room. We can't afford a suite but this is a nice alternative and everyone gets at least one night out having fun.

I will chime in to add my vote for getting a suite in a hotel or renting a condo or other property through a website like vrbo.com or homeaway.com. Especially when you're just traveling with one, you can save money by renting something very small that has a porch or balcony where you can spend the evening while the baby sleeps.

Another thing we do: take the time to research before you go, and grab some great cheese, wine, and charcuterie while you're out during the day and you can have an awesome dinner while the baby sleeps.

2 things that have worked for us:

1. Travel with friends (with kids) or family, company that you enjoy, so that a bottle of wine and some take-out/room service can make it a nice evening for everyone. Also, take turns babysitting and give each other some adult time off.

2. Have a great stroller that is comfortable enough for the child so sleep in. On our most recent trip to Europe, we'd head back to our room to get some rest, give some dinner to our toddler, freshen up and then head out. We could typically hang out for a couple of hours and enjoy a nice dinner while he slept in the stroller. Of course he is pretty good with transitioning back to the bed and doesn't wake up too much.