I don't know what came over me last weekend (probably the imminent visit of my brother and the crazy urge to clean that always proceeds the arrival of guests) but suddenly I felt overwhelmed by everything in my house. "Where did all this stuff come from? What possessed me to buy this or order that?" Everywhere I looked… stuff. I couldn't take it anymore. "Out you go", I thought, and out went: chairs, rugs, tables, bowls, and stools. And knick knacks. Soo many knick knacks. In came a handful of cash and an overwhelming feeling of peace.
I've been living in my home a long, long time. And stuff accumulates. I moved in with one suitcase, a set of Thonet chairs and a fully-stocked kitchen. I know that when I move out, I'll need much more than a van to transport everything. And that feels overwhelming and burdensome to me. Maybe it's an age thing? I do notice that the older I get the less stuff I want. (I feel pretty sure I could go overboard the other way.) I've definitely become less sentimental about stuff. The things that I used to have trouble parting with I now put happily into the bag destined for the charity shop. Now what I find appealing is space. White walls. a few really amazing pieces with a story … a lamp I found on a trip to the desert, chairs from my uncle's studio, grandma's silver. I want to spend less time dusting and more time drinking wine with friends. I want room for a spontaneous pajama dance party or an invigorating game of Wii tennis. I want room for my friends' kids to come over and not have to worry about them bumping into furniture or breaking a knick knack. And the furniture and tchotchkes that I do have must be functional. A couch comfortable enough for a long afternoon nap or to play the role of bed for a friend who's in town for the weekend. A dining table that also works as a desk, a craft table and a place to roll out cookies.
That's the dream, at any rate. The reality is that I'm human. I love shiny, pretty things. I need those… owl coasters, crocheted pillows, hand carved bowls. I want to take them home. Sometimes I win the battle with myself. Sometimes I put it down and walk away. And sometimes… not so much.
It's a constant struggle, one I know I'll never win. And that's okay. Because I love stuff… even when I don't.
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This summer I finally buckled down and got rid of over 20 tubs in the basement of stuff I just didn't want anymore. It took about 5 Sundays of setting up at flea market and dropping off at Goodwill after. It felt sooo good!! We ran out of warm weather and now I'm hating the 8 tubs that are still in the basement. I've also edited so much throughout the house...ebay and Etsy have been a God send for me.
It's definitely age and the overwhelming task of cleaning and dusting everything that drove me. Impending visitors with too much stuff means maniacal cleaning sessions. I'm starting to really love the idea of less is more even though, I too, love stuff!!
oh, how very true!
I've been helping my parents declutter and it's made me want to pare down my own belongings. It's one of those things you have to keep up on constantly.
I moved into my first bought home about six months ago, and promptly set about buying all the designer pieces I'd dreamt of having. Arco lamp, Bertoia wire chairs, huge MCM sideboard, Eames eiffel dining chairs... the list goes on. Now I'm about to move again and I've realised just how little of it I actually need - I was just buying things which fitted the image I had of my home, rather than the actual space!
Amen.
Yeah, STUFF happens. I am guilty of having too much of it, too.
I kept saving everything for a garage sales or for posting it on Kijiji etc., but I had 2 garage sales and I realized that the money I would make is not worth it. People are extremely cheap and expect to get expensive stuff (in mint condition) practically for free. So lately I have gotten more radical and I force myself to drop it off at Value Village. I just gave them a rug for which I had paid $350 (wool). Some items are harder to part with than others ..... it's a work in progress.
It is so funny to read this post-earlier today I blogged about this very same subject. I have challenged myself to get rid of 1 item per day for the entire month of October. It is going awesome and mostly I get rid of 2-5 items per day. Crazy that I can let go of that much stuff and still have a full house.
So...I know exactly how you feel-good to know I am not alone :)
True, people are cheap, but I also find that many people trying to sell their "stuff" think it's more valuable than it actually is. When I am looking to buy things, if the price of a used item is somewhat close to the price of a new item, I'll just buy the new one. Garage sales are not the place to try and get top dollar for your stuff. People simply are not going to pay a lot of money for stuff at those kinds of sales.
True, people are cheap, but I also find that many people trying to sell their "stuff" think it's more valuable than it actually is. When I am looking to buy things, if the price of a used item is somewhat close to the price of a new item, I'll just buy the new one. Garage sales are not the place to try and get top dollar for your stuff. People simply are not going to pay a lot of money for stuff at those kinds of sales.
We recently sold one house and moved to another. Lacking experience, this took about 3 months. All our stuff was stored in a friend’s basement and we lived in the new house, empty, for a month before we finished the renovations. The lesson we learned, besides planning better or not moving, was that we really didn't need that much stuff. In fact, life is simpler, cleaner and easier with less stuff. Now we have a basement full of boxes and feelings of dread in unpacking and finding places to put everything.
My coworker returned from a posting in Chile and when she got her stuff out of storage after 2 years abroad she just decided to bring most of it into her new house's living room and then invited her friends to have at it. I envy her ability to let go. I just moved myself and every knick knack thrown out feels like a stabbing but afterwards the relief at having less stuff is just so, so great.
Sigh. I'm in the process of unpacking after a lengthy and painfully expensive home rehab, and I'm having trouble figuring out what to keep and what to toss. I know I have too much stuff, but deciding what must go is difficult, partly because I keep hearing a little voice inside my head asking whether I'll need this in the future. In fact, other than feeling overwhelmed, my reaction to all that I've accumulated over the years is quite different from the author of this post. When I was younger, I had little difficulty getting rid of things I no longer used or needed. These days, I'm much more likely to hang onto useless objects only for their sentimental value. Go figure!
My trick is to live in smaller places, so that I can't get more stuff. It's crazy how my friends kept buying larger houses so that they can store their stuff, and have to spend more time working to get the money to buy more stuff to fill the house. Complain about having no time, no space, then go out and buy a larger house!
My family and friends are mostly mild-hoarders. When they buy stuff, they attach the feelings to their self-worth. I think it is a bit of a mental problem. (Buying an iPad doesn't make you a better person.) They have a hard time parting with stuff because it seems to destroy part of themselves.
One thing I've noticed with me is that sometimes I put things away and discover them later on as a buried treasure and at times they are nothing but garbage. I wonder sometimes why I bothered to buy a lot of things but I don't beat myself up over it.
Just get rid of what you don't want, hold on to things you aren't sure of for a year and treasure the things that matter.
Having some hoarders in the family helps me to keep myself in check despite having tendencies to save things, myself.
I feel like I go back and forth on this issue. I'll have a moment where I get rid of all the "stuff" in my space. But then later I'll look around and think something should go there, I need something here. And then I'm back in purchase mode. I guess the key is only buying things that 1. you need 2. you love 3. will last. Easy said then done.
God, yes. I'm going through the same thing. Part of what propagated it was a consignment shop that opened down the street. It became easy to dispose of things and maybe get better furniture that suited me a little better. Also I saw what other people were throwing out and it made me think about throwing things out. I've long felt "the tyranny of things" taking up mental space. Things I've inherited, things that have a memory attached to them. But I've always felt comfortable in an entirely different sort of space. One where there is a lot of emptiness.
As far as couches...I've gone through that too. I want my dogs to be able to sit with me. I want a couch I can fall asleep on. As much as I like some of the more architecturally inclined pieces of furniture in the end of the day I went with a slipcovered sofa. I can get it all cleaned when that one spot is driving my ocd insane. And I can sleep on it.
I don't think it's getting older, I think it's getting smarter and realizing the mental toll all these things are taking up in your mind and that life is short. Time to simplify and find your passion.
Yup, it's a neverending struggle to keep on top of stuff. I don't buy a lot of it to begin with but it still feels great to drop stuff off at Goodwill and get rid of stuff that I don't need and use.
Ah yes. I discovered minimalism about a year ago, and it is a long recovery from what I realize was near hoarding to where I currently am, and we still have a long way to go, but for a family of 4 very active people with many interests, we are doing pretty well.
The exciting thing is the influence it is having on my daughter. She will regularly bring me some toys or books and say "These can go to Goodwill, I don't need them any more" and out they go. She loves to do gymnastics on the floor at home, and she knows the clutter would get in the way.
I breathe a huge sigh of relief when I see clear surfaces, white space...for me it means peace, calm and sanctuary from the crazy, busy, material world we sometimes live in.
Oh, and for the mental problem aspects of "stuff"...I think most of it is a type of blindness. If we can remove ourselves from our space and return to it with fresh eyes, see it as a stranger might, suddenly we realize how much crap we have accumulated. I find that helps a lot.
Also, cultivating the ability to like and admire something without feeling the need to OWN it....I love to admire pretty baubles, but before buying any, I catch myself and get that mental picture of me having to clean around it, move it, store it, and eventually cart it off the Goodwill and suddenly I'm happy to simply admire and move on...
I love taking things to Deseret Industries - Utah's Salvation Army. I know that my things will go into the "flow of life" instead of just bulking up drawers, closets and tabletops. Space, and in particular, "ma" - white space - is the true luxury.
@ adora
Word.
I want to give a shout out to Freecycle. Great way to give your unwanted stuff a new home, as long as no money exchanges hands. I have had very positive experiences giving things away in the Chicagoland community. Nowadays, I post to my Facebook page first to give friends first dibs.
Well timed post. I am moving for first time in six years and really looking forward to the new space and having had purged. Not mentally ready for the purging itself. :^|
WHY do we collect so much stuff? How does it happen? I think living in a small space or moving frequently or having frequent houseguests can help, but I wonder about the underlying urge to collect/purchase/own. I have been taking bags and bags of things to various thrift shops and charities in preparation for a big move (after 16 years in the same HUGE apartment), and I cannot believe I have accumulated so much stuff over the course of that time. Who has a good resource for decluttering, streamlining, simplifying? Im starting to think I need to go on a reality show!?!
in anticipation of a year abroad traveling for work, i subletted my apartment to a friend. he had some of his own furniture (bed, chairs, desk) but mostly he's using my stuff. some of my furniture and all of my personal items had to get crammed into a single, large closet. that process helped me get rid of a lot of things and inspired me to cut back even more when i do finally move back in.
also, by living out of two suitcases and a weekender bag for the last 2 months, i've wanted to cut down on that stuff as well. i'm hoping to reduce everything to a single suitcase and to lighten up the weekender. gone are the days when i thought i could get by with just a duffle bag.