Make sure you have a conversation with everyone who comes. Not just "how's it going" but try to engage in some sort of meaningful interaction to make them feel like you are happy they came.

Have drinks ready to go - glasses out, bottles open, etc. Only serve one dish that needs to be hot, any sides or hors'd'oevres should be good at room temp. Introduce everyone and say something about them: "This is Sarah. She writes a blog about ponies." That way, people have something to start a conversation. Make sure you have clean guest towels and enough toilet paper.

Carrotsticks,I so agree!

From my experience, being there for the guests is the most important. When I didn't know better, I used to be so busy preparing and cooking and cleaning for the party that I forgot to entertain the guests. Now, I try to make less varieties of foods and let the piles of dishes sit there and try to engage with the guests more. Of course, hiring a helper is probably the best idea..=)

I try to make food that doesn't have to be cooked once company arrives - casseroles, dips, etc so that I'm not stuck in the kitchen while everyone else is having fun!

I do as much as I can beforehand so that I can spend time with my guests. I always have most of dinner ready, snacks pre-made, a bar set up with drinks and glasses, and a house cocktail made especially for the occasion. Having a house cocktail makes guests feel special and it's a fun way to start the party. If you're enjoying yourself, so will your guests! Also, the TV should be off unless you're gathering around it to watch a game, election results etc.

Definitely for me, hiring someone to help is key. I do all the cooking and prep myself and then hire someone to come in to tend bar and pass appetizers and clean while they go. That way, while I may be a crazy person for a week right up until the party, by the time the party starts, I am relaxed and in full hostess mode and feel like a guest at my own party!

Play music that's good but sort of non-specific - either instrumental, like Django Reinhardt, or in another language, like Edith Piaf or other old French torch music. It'll set a festive mood but won't be too distracting in terms of conversation or genre allegiances.

Use real dishes and glasses and linens (within reason) and stash the dirties out of sight until everyone goes home. I use the bathtub. The bathtub is also good for hiding junk, like your bike or a large house plant, during a party. Also, have a place for coats. And DON'T ask people to remove their shoes. I HATE that.

In Texas, if the host is cooking, most things that take a while are ready to go and the fast things are made with guest participation. So really you have a grazing table in the main area and then the real meal is served about 30 mins to an hour after the guests begin to arrive. Not all guests will fit in the kitchen so you let them lead the conversations out in the main area. This obviously works best with a partner to help. The idea of two separate parties until meal time works because if someone doesn't find interesting conversation in one are they can find it in another.

Keep the food and drink AWAY From the kitchen (if you plan to be in it). People naturally gravitate toward these two things, so unless you want to be shooing them out of the way all night, keep these things in the communal areas as much as possible.

I agree that a "house special" drink in a large beverage dispenser is a must. Set up multiple trash locations. Cups with sharpies for labeling will help reduce the number of cups people use when they forget where they put theirs.

Inevitably, certain guests will make requests of you that you did not anticipate (allergic to onion? wish you had told me before I put onion dip mix in ALL the burger patties). Roll with it, try to be as accommodating as possible, and take note if you plan on inviting them to your next party.

Agree on prep the food beforehand and make sure it's low-fuss items once the guests arrive. Best thing we did is build a house with a kitchen open to the great room, so even when we are fussing we arent cut off from the party. We also set a bar/coffee station/appetizers out far from the kitchen, that draws people away and helps them circulate. Clear all your surfaces of unnecessary items ahead of time and if you're not into coasters or glass rings on your tables - throw interesting fabric or ceramic tile toppers on them. - you will be glad you did.

Focus on the food first and foremost. If budget is an issue, always put majority into food. Honestly I never hear a complaint about any event when the food is awesome. I think people actually forget about anything else. Of course, drinks are next. Have variety or, at best, the most popular beverages. Finally know your crowd. If it's family that you know love to play games, well have some awesome games lined up and throw in good, fun, and/or silly prizes. If it's a more sophisticated bunch then prepare to do a lot of introductions and have conversation topics ready and like several people previously mentioned, go around and talk to everyone. The worst thing as a host or hostess is to invite people that don't know each other and stick with just a few of your closest or appear cliquish. That is the ultimate no no. Truthfully I always feel like good food and drinks take a party a long way!

My new party hosting mantra is KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid! I believe Ina Garten said that you don't need three entree options, just one. One great side dish or two make up for three cracker/fruit spreads. It doesn't need to be spartan, but you don't need to drive yourself nuts cooking. Clear off all surfaces - party prep is a great time to purge all the junk sitting around (old magazines, boxes, random receipts, etc), or at the very least, to throw it into the cupboard. I also make sure the bathroom gets a wipe-down and that there's a candle burning (unless there are kids, then no fire, but I do hide the kiddie foam soap and pull out the "nicer" one).

Raise your glass and make a toast, at least three times during the meal. Once for the host, once for the cook and those who prepared the meal and once for the guests who honour you with their presence. This simple ritual usually inspires others to do the same. Through our appreciation, there begins the magic of sharing the moment together.

Make it easy for your guests to make it easy on you. Have clearly marked, accessible receptacles for trash and recycling; have soap available at every sink; leave extra toilet paper in the bathroom (and make sure there's a toilet plunger and some air freshener in there, should your guests need them); indicate where they can put coats; have the corkscrew or fondue forks or whatever implements people need handy; don't forget to put out a pitcher of water in addition to more interesting beverages. In short, anticipate your guests' needs so that they don't need to come ask you to attend to little annoyances like the toilet paper when you should be greeting people and mingling,

I like entertaining, but at the same time, I can't remember having a party where I didn't feel frazzled and pulled in every direction making sure everything flowed smoothly. I love the idea of hiring someone to help. I just wish I could do this without coming across as kind of pretentious. Not sure about it, but I love the thought of having people over and being able to just enjoy their company without having to fuss the whole time!

Everything Parnassus said in the 2nd comment.

Have a big glass of wine about 20 minutes before you think the first guest will arrive

It is a bit old fashioned, perhaps stodgy, but I love circulating with trays of drinks and food. I find that when I have a crowd of 40 packed in my apartment, all engaged in great conversation, people appreciate it when I dive in and out of the conversation offering up a tray of spiked hot chocolate or an already cut and plated slice of cake or pie, or a cup of trifle. For some reason, I find people timid about cutting and plating their own desserts, like they are afraid to mess up a nice looking cake. If I do it for them and hand them a plate and fork people seem to chow down and are even more likely to eat seconds when I just whisk past them and hand them the plate.

hrhprincessfiona nailed it. :)

But also yes, don't make food that you have to fuss over instead of visiting and enjoying your guests. Ina Garten is my go-to for those types of recipes! When you as the host are relaxed and having fun everyone else can, too.

Oh, and, don't drink too much.

I don't stock liquor so if you want to drink alcohol, you're welcome to bring your own and share. But I always give people a spot where they can leave bottles of wine and liquor.

Lighting, Music, Food... in that order. You get those 3 right and the party will host itself!

I liked to serve very yummy, gourmet style finger food that tastes great at room temperature. From topped crostinis to lettuce wraps to the tiny cupcakes - no forks, no knives and two hands are not needed to eat. This way people can stand and eat if necessary, plus it is easy for the guests and easier on me after the party. Room temperature allows you to put the food out and not worry about it.

And I agree with amvolpe, Lighting, Music and Food are main things to get right. Also, be sure to properly introduce someone who is new to your group, and like someone else said, actually say something about them, not just their name.