My 3-year old daughter has been asking me for a toy lawn mower for weeks now. After checking online reviews and seeing the faded, broken ones at the neighborhood playground, I decided to make one myself. It turned out great (although I wished it actually cut the grass) and she's really happy with it. The only problem now is what color to paint it. You see, I assumed I'd be painting it some combination of classic red, black, and white or possibly a John Deere-esqe green and yellow. But what color does my 3-year old daughter want? Yeah, you guessed it: pink.
And now I'm stuck. I can't bring myself to paint it pink. Why? I'm not sure. Part of the problem is that I've put so much work into it that I feel like it's sort of mine, too. The wheels turn the axels, which turn rubber bands that turn spools on a dowel that turns that wood circle on top. When the big circle turns, the wooden balls hanging off it knock against smaller dowels attached to the body, and it makes an awesome thumping motor noise. See? I really got into this. And although I do love pink, it's just not what I had in mind.
But then I caught myself in an philosophical quandary. What if she'd been a boy and asked for a pink mower? Proudly, I would've lacquered the whole thing pink and even added glitter if he'd asked.
So obviously I have to dig a little deeper to really get what my problem is with painting it pink. I guess that old shaved head, gender studies, question authority part of me wishes that she wasn't into pink, that she loved only boy stuff like machines and mowers and monsters, so I could boast how I've raised a daughter completely free from gender stereotyping. But, alas, as you can see in the picture above, she loves pink. I've made all the choices available to her, easy to do since I have an older son and an older daughter, and my little one loves it all. Tools, mud, mowers, Barbie, baking, and babies.
I keep stalling for time, asking every few days what color we should paint it, and the answer is still unwaveringly pink. I suppose I'm thinking too much about it. I'm prone to that as you can see from the mower itself, which for now remains a natural wood tone.
(Images: Katie Steuernagle)
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I think since you offered to let her pick the color, you need to just paint it pink. Honestly, I think we all make too big a deal about little girls' love of pink. I've been guilty of it myself, but now I realise I've been attaching a host of values to what is, at the end of the day, just a color. Paint it a cool fuchsia if she will go for that or pink with green wheels. Don't worry, you haven't failed to raise a strong feminist just because she likes pink at age 3. After all, she asked for a lawn mower, not an iron. Anyway, at age 5, my daughter seems to moving past the all pink stage already.
I feel your pain...and yet, it's her mower, right? Maybe she gets a pink mower and you get material for a blog post or dinner-party story.
Would it make it better if you painted it hot pink with neon flames along the sides, sort of like a monster truck mower?
Or let HER paint it/color it/decorate it as she pleases. You might be surprised by the color combinations she comes up with!
By the way, I'm in awe of your construction skills!
Oh, yeah. Great job on the building the mower!
That is a really cool mower. I'd stop worrying about your philosophical quandary. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about women overcoming stereotypes. I got a BFA insisting on a woodworking & metalsmithing emphasis instead of jewelry & textiles. This woman can operate a table saw & hammer sheets of metals into bowls w/ the best of them. That's not where I am happiest, though. I didn't feel like I "found myself" until I had my first kid when I was 28 yrs old. Now, I am a stay at home Mom to 4 kids and homeschool. I am happiest nuzzling my little ones on the couch and making our home aesthetically pleasing for our family (we may even have a little pink thrown in for good measure, God forbid!) Honestly, when did it become horrible to be a woman in a traditional role & when did pink become a color girl should abhor lest they fall into the dreaded traditional role? Make her happy & paint it pink or do what I'd do and just poly it because that is how it'd be the aesthetically pleasing.
"it'd be the MOST aesthetically pleasing." Sorry, I'm typing w/ a writhing baby in my arms and skipping words. oops.
Ha. I've been there. Great design by the way. My daughter would say the same thing. She seems to have lot of LIGHT pink in her genes. Of course, so did my son.
There is nothing wrong with pink and plenty of good shades of it. I would probably go with hot pink and lime with some flames.
You can still be a strong capable girl and like the color pink!
And it is a really kick*ss mower.
Love the mower! Paint it pink, if that's what she wants. To me, scorning the "girly" is just one step from scorning girls. You even admit, like a lot of feminist moms I know (myself included), that you would be delighted if she loved more "boyish" things. I think a lot of girls take away from this "boy>girl" and that's the opposite of the message you want your girl to get.
Wow. Katie. Gorgeous work! And beautifully said too. Pink is such a loaded colour isn't it? My little guy loved pink ... until the kids at pre-school told him he wasn't supposed to. Why does a colour need to be so darn complicated?!
From an aesthetic perspective, it's also tough. But there are a lot of different kinds of pink to choose from ... maybe one you can stomach seeing on your masterpiece? And maybe they are only highlights instead of the whole darn thing pink? Just a thought! Which I'm sure you already thought of.
: )
Good luck!
I love pink and have no issues with it whatsoever, but I personally wouldn't want to paint that mower pink either! I would either lacquer it or go with classic red. It's just gorgeous and classic the way it is and I'd be afraid pink (or most other colors) would take away from that. Although you can always paint over it again! If I were to go with pink I'd do a combo of pale pink, peony and raspberry. I think that'd look really cool actually.
first of all, it's a rad mower! lucky girl! but if you asked her to pick the color, you've got to let her have the color (otherwise just avoid giving options, which is my usual go-to line of defense ;)
i would choose a shiny hot pink or a hot coral color. summery and girly and she will love you for it.
I agree with others, there's a wide range of pinks out there besides the dreaded Barbie pink. I also like the pink/brown combo you see a lot these days.
I don't really understand the double standard. If it's OK for a boy to like pink, it's OK for a girl to like pink. I say this as a woman who doesn't like pink with a husband who does.
i absolutely understand the hesitation! my (almost) four year old is also a "paint it pink" type. although the pink thing doesn't bother me as much as the princess thing. it goes against every feminist bone in my body. luckily, she hasn't gotten there yet and hopefully we can bypass it all together. but if/when she gets there, the only thing i can do is bite my tongue and roll over.
Personally I like pink, I embrace the pink. I just don't like plastic Barbie pink. Since you asked her, I'd go ahead with the pink. (though personally I like it wood toned and would have just sealed it)
How about a pink colored stain and then then sealant?
Awesome job on the mower! I say since you offered to let her choose the color, go with pink. Maybe even take her to the store with you and let HER pick out the shade of pink and even let HER paint it herself. Yeah, it won't be perfect, but it'll be HERS and that's what she'll love (and she'll feel so proud of herself)!
Beautiful mower! How about staining it pink? You could dilute some burgundy stain if you can't find pink wood stain. This way, I think, while she gets the pink, you still maintain that handmade look that make it less "princess" and more "real girl" -- for lack of better words...
Okay... Tanya rocked the answer. Staining it pink is a brilliant idea... And THAT is a brilliant mower no matter what color you paint it!
How about John Deere colors? Green and yellow! Or Honda? Red and white!
You're a great parent, not the kind who will ask her what she wants and then do what you wanted to all along anyway, which sends the kind of messages I'll bet you NEVER send.
Pink it is, then.
How about a combo of natural stain on 80% of it and then a raspberry stain or paint on the "motor box" and the dowel for the handle? Best of both worlds?
As a color expert I would say : paint it pink, yes, if she asked for it....but add coral-red and turquoise accents. And maybe a bit of golden yellow. You will be surprised how non-pink the result will be, because it's out of the pink symbol scheme.
1. That mower is too cool. Color choice aside, I can totally understand not wanting to paint over your careful work. But you'd be even sadder, having done all that work, if she played with it less because it wasn't a color she loved, right? I dig the stain idea, but I bet you could paint it really beautifully. Not just in block colors, but with her name or some flowers or other summer images. And it'll clean more easily!
2. I understand the soul searching, I really do. But maybe her choice isn't the failure you're thinking it is. Maybe she's just she's a step beyond you, she's a post-feminist - for her, all toys and all colors are on the table: it doesn't occur to her that a lawn mower *wouldn't* be pink.
3. As everyone has said, your only mistake was asking her if you weren't fully willing to follow through. Lesson learned. Pink!
I think this is a parenting life lesson. In the future, perhaps you will not ask the question of color at all and instead present her with a lovely handmade mower that is natural wood and stays that way. We try to buy as much natural wood as possible because it is so classically beautiful. Especially if you think you might have another child down the road who may not agree that pink is the best color out there. Good luck with choosing the right pink!
I love Tanya's staining suggestion as well. It's a great mower, however I am rolling my eyes at the color concern. Why does it matter? Kids are their own person too, and if she likes pink, let her like pink.