Brondell Swash 800

(Image credit: Apartment Therapy)

We’d like to test drive this in our test lab just like Walt Mossberg at the WSJ has: “We Test a Digital Commode That Warms, Washes, Dries; Sometimes Old Ways Are Best.

Copycatting Toto’s Neorest line, the Brondell Swash 800 takes the Johnny Depp pirate approach to the bathroom by swashbuckling in and upgrading the last thing you would have thought needed it: the toilet seat.

Priced at $1000, the Swash 800 retrofits on 98% of all standard toilets and provides you with “a more comfortable and luxurious bathroom experience.” How? With a cordless remote control firmly in hand, it allows you to warmly wash and dry your tushie: “two retractable wands to provide a filtered posterior and feminine warm-water wash and features a warm air dryer for a shower-fresh feeling.”

Gizmodo has already had fun skewering Walt Mossberg’s review over at the Wall Street Journal, but the motive for this invention is clear: Brondell is trying to cash in on the rising trend in bathroom remodels, where Americans are spending more of their money than ever before. (Thanks, Oliver!)