Middle Children, You Haven’t Been Forgotten: This Candle Is Just for You

published Nov 18, 2019
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Credit: Whiskey River Soap Co.

Middle children have a reputation. Between the boundary-breaking of their older sibling(s) and all the needs of the younger one(s), middle children can be overlooked, left to fend for themselves and find creative ways to get their parents’ attention. Short of validation and nurturing, one gift you can give your favorite middle child to show them how much you care is this cheeky candle from Whiskey River Soap Co.

What does being a middle child smell like? Well, according to the label of A Candle for the Middle Child, it’s a largely invisible scent (but also it’s grape). Like the candle, its description perfectly captures that unique middle-child frustration:

“The only thing worse than being unnoticed is still being unnoticed when your hair is neon pink and you dress like you’re in the Matrix. Um, hello? Being the first child ain’t all that. The only people who think so are #1. my older siblings and #2. my dumb parents. And I haven’t even gotten to the part about the (cry)baby of the family. Oy.”

For the rest of the family, there’s also A Candle for the First Child (“smells like you’re just more important”) and A Candle for the Youngest (“smells like an afterthought”). For the parents, there’s A Candle for Okay Moms (“smells like truth”) and two options for dads: A Candle for Dad Jokes (“smells like groaning kids”) and A Candle for Dad Bods (“smells like cookies & cable sports”).

You might remember Whiskey River Soap Co. as the company that brought you A Candle for Fucking Meetings, which figuratively smells like it “could have been an email” and literally smells like bourbon coffee. 

The Candle for the Middle Child comes in a 17-ounce size, which costs $19.95 and has a 60-hour burn time. That’s long enough for some cathartic journaling of your middle-child feelings.