The Messiest Closet? Nicholas’s Split Personalities
Name: Nicholas Noyes
Hood: SoCo (ie South of Columbia, aka west 100’s)
Dimensions: A generously appointed bedroom closet – perhaps 9 ft high, 3 ft wide, and nearly 2 ft deep.
My bedroom closet constitutes a link between my early adulthood and my current self. Because, somewhere underneath last summers tropical shirt, and a fairway bag full of paid bills and credit-card solicitations, there are bags full of crap I scraped up from the floor of my old closet when I moved into my current apartment nearly twelve years ago.
And beneath that, I’m convinced, at the bottom of it all is box containing a folder full of useful information given to me during Freshman orientation, six cool looking beer caps, and a party tape of Joy Division, Mission of Burma and the Human League all of which were packed up when I left my dorm-room the first year of college and have been toting around every since.
The middle strata is full of good intentions (plastic storage cubes with neatly folded clothes which were lost to me as soon as they entered the closet) and bad deeds (holdalls full of dirty laundry from the mid-nineties).
Added wrinkle: The closet contains the shut-off valves for our
bathroom, and so the closet must be (partially) emptied under the bemused eye of the super anytime plumbing work happens in the bathroom.