The World's Ugliest Condo: My Ballad of Renovation Woes

The World's Ugliest Condo: My Ballad of Renovation Woes

Dabney Frake
Apr 5, 2012

You know what happens after the demo stage of renovating? Stuff starts happening, and happening really quickly. It often involves mind-numbingly dumb things that require tiny spurts of brain usage. These aren't huge earth-shattering things, but they can accumulate and make you crazy. Yes, I know. I asked for it.

Official Disclaimer: This post contains shameless self-pity, copious amounts of princess problems, and unchecked hyperbole. Read at your own risk.

Sometimes when you buy a tub, it will be too wide for the shower alcove. And then you'll discover that the only ones that will fit are almost exactly like the ones that were just ripped out. So instead of the deeper, more comfortable baths you planned for, you get to purchase the same extremely shallow bathtubs all over again (just white instead of off-white). And then the first new ones will have to be returned to the home improvement store, but not before hanging out in the condo for several weeks taking up a lot of space.

On other days you'll have a million pounds of flooring delivered to the condo, and 15 minutes before the truck shows up (late) you'll be informed that the crew didn't want to wait anymore and left. And you'll be left to haul flooring up the stairs yourself with the one remaining dude left on site. Glad I was in town that day.

I blinked and the place got painted. And by painted I mean painted and textured. I wasn't anticipating that. Turns out that my particular handytractors work from precedent, and that involves a certain substance called "orange peel" that must always go on the walls and ceiling. It's not my favorite, but it's certainly not devastating. So I am moving on.

Bathroom vanities can bite me. I've been looking for one for ages. Originally, I thought I'd pull a perfect one (clean lines, right size, easy to customize) out of my back pocket and be done with it. But after many, many, many Craigslist trips, internet marathon sessions, and store runs to visit potential candidates, I'm still empty-handed. There are tons of great dressers and cabinets out there. Some are too shallow and don't allow for a sink and a faucet behind it. Others require too much refinishing. And I am totally unwilling to spend over $1,000 on something that, in my mind, is so not worth it.

So that's the type of stuff that's been on my mind lately. How've you been?

Introducing the World's Ugliest Condo
The World's Ugliest Condo: Scope of Work & Budget
The World's Ugliest Condo: Finding That Special Contractor
The World's Ugliest Condo: A Glimpse of What's To Come

(Images: Dabney Frake)

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