WHAT THE...Is That a Black Widow SPIDER!?

WHAT THE...Is That a Black Widow SPIDER!?

Grace Shu
Sep 13, 2007

There are many, many things that I have come to terms with as I've gotten older. Such as: I will never be the type of person with perfect hair at 7 am (or any other time, for that matter); I can barely cook; and while I am forgetful with names, I can remember every word to Salt n Pepa's "Shoop." Also? I am not one of those people who deal well--or at all, to be perfectly frank--with creepy-crawlies. So when I found not one...not two...but THREE black widow spiders setting up a campsite in my backyard, I about LOST. MY. MARBLES.

After I screamed my head off like a little girl, I hauled my dog in the house and grabbed the phone and hysterically demanded that my burliest friend come over RIGHT NOW and kill them all. (In true tough-guy form, he said in mid-stomp, "It's really a shame, these spiders are cool looking..." while I flapped around the perimeter squeaking out, "Just kill 'em! And don't forget to kill the egg sac too! OMG! Ahhh!")

After doing some research, black widow spiders are rather common in LA (as well as certain areas in the midwest), and advice ranges from old wives' remedies (putting eucalpytus plants in corners, chestnuts heaps, and vinegar) to scientific (pesticide spray) to old-fashioned (wear long pants and tennis shoes and stomp on them). Anyone else have any spider-ridding suggestions?

PS. If you see a crazy cobweb (they are haphazard, thick, with no typical Charlotte's web-like design and super strong), proceed with caution, that is Black Widow territory. (Mine were hiding underneath my picnic table).

PPS. If you don't see any posts from me in the next few days, please contact one of the other editors. As I could be a) dead from a black widow spider bite; b) passed out from extreme hyperventilation from seeing one; c) standing on a table, clutching my dog because one of those spiders made it in my house (which hasn't happened. Yet.)

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