Well said. I'm on the same stumbling boat and even though some days are a bit frustrating, the majority of my days are a gratifying combination of kids and work. Kids are adaptable, I have to remind myself. As long as they get some time with me, they can figure out how to play without me, and that's good for them. Thanks for the affirmation!

I am struggling to figure out how to find a company that will allow a work from home solution. I also can't imagine how I'd find 40 or so hours a week to be able to work with my toddler at home unless I give up sleeping. Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks soooo much for sharing this! I stumble through my day and my job and my identity and earning power daily. It's tough for moms, trying to do it all. We need to know that there are a lot of us out there. What about a neighborhood co-op? Once a week, one mom takes all the kids (maybe only three or four!) and the other moms get a few extra hours to get some work done. It takes a village, even if we're only connected to by the internet, knowing there are others out there. Btw, where did that amazing french bulldog in a suit photo come from?! My preschooler would loooooove it!

I've been working in my position for 7 years, the last 2 years have been entirely at home (the closest office is 2.5 hours away). I'm about to have our first child and have really struggled with coming up with a solution that's going to work for everyone. My husband also technically works from home, but is in and out all day long so I can't rely on him to be a co-caregiver. My job is such that I don't have a ton of flexibility to my days, but can schedule some days to be busier than others.
The solution we're going to try is daycare three days a week (MWF) so we can still focus on getting our business things done just as if we were in an office but will have lots of flexibility and more family time with the child being home on Tues/Thurs.
I feel extremely grateful to have this opportunity to be in my child's life more (just cutting out the commute alone saves me 10 hours a week that I would have been spending!) and wish more companies had alternative working arrangements.

It’s hard to know where to begin with this “article.” I’m a little blinded by the artfully displayed glass of wine and bowl of blueberries on the table and the lack of an actual - um - toddler, but I digress.

By working from home – do we mean, “I blog for free?” or “I earn money to pay the mortgage?” I’m sorry, if you’re earning money to pay the mortgage, chances are you can’t get by with just naptime and bribing your 2 year old in fruit snacks to buy 10 minutes of emails. You have to – gasp – actually pay for childcare like the rest of the sweaty, suit-wearing masses. (Or at least you have to work out a system with like-minded friends and trade off child care.)

I’ve worked from home for 8 years earning – at times – a full-time salary on my own terms around my kids’ schedules.

“Don’t plan on working all day.” Wow – the thing is, when you have an actual job – you have to actually work! It’s amazing how people who pay you expect something in return! Yes, there are days when things don’t go as planned. But during work hours – I’m working. During non work hours – and I do plan for those during the day/week – I’m on train table duty.

Be prepared to have a toddler help with home projects and chores? Wait. Let me stop laughing hysterically. That one is too easy. Never mind … A lunch break? That’s what I give up in exchange for my awesome work from home schedule. Also doing the crossword puzzle on the commute.

Ok, ok, I get it - it's just trying to be cute but ... seriously - NO one has a lit candle on their coffee table if they have a toddler. Just sayin' ....

i find it impossible to work with my 2.5 year old at home with me. she seems to require almost constant attention. when she sees me in front of my laptop, she wants to get on it too. the 2 hour nap is great, but can't get everything done in 2 hours.

Boy was I thrilled to read some of these comments! I've been working from home for 7 years, and I have a 3.5 year old. I work on a project to project basis so sometimes I am a stay-at -home mom but when I am working he has childcare. Because I'm working. People that think you can properly care for a small child and be an efficient and responsible worker are kidding themselves. Even with a part time work schedule and full time preschool (nowadays - he had a nanny until he was 3) I end up working after dinner almost ever night when I have a project. This is a toss up for being able to pick him up at school at 3 sometimes but I wouldn't change it for anything. If you are lucky enough to work at home and see your child for lunch, throw in some laundry between conference calls and even prep dinner during a slow afternoon that's amazing. If you think working at home means you can take care of an infant you are seriously in for a wake up call. "Don't plan on working all day" pretty much sums it up!

Jonnifer, your idea for at least part-time day care is a good one. Just be prepared, both financially and with wait lists at day cares, to switch to more than just 3-days/week if the 3-day/week schedule does not work out as planned.

While jcmom is being pointedly snarky, much of what's posted there is valid. If your work is part-time and can be done a couple of hours here and there, doing it at home with your children there may be a dream come true. But if you simply work from home with the expectation of producing the same amount of work as those who show up at the office daily, doing so with kids at home means you're doing two jobs at the same time (your regular job and childcare).

If you end up with an "easy" baby who sleeps well, and on a pretty regular schedule, you'll be one of the lucky ones who can plan on an hour or two of work during the naps, but you can't count on it (we've had good and bad nappers at our house).. As they get older, and nap less (or, gasp! drop the nap altogether), it becomes impossible to work at home with young children, especially if you're opposed to using the television or other electronic gadgets as babysitters. Even when they're old enough for preschool, most preschools let out at noon or 2:30, which gives you just 4-6 hours of "working" time while they're away from home. Even if your work is flexible enough where you can try to make up the time after they go to bed, you may be too exhausted by the end of the day to pick back up on 2-3 hours more of work you need to do to keep up with the demands of the job.

In short, successful working from home depends a lot on the demands of the work you're trying to get accomplished from home.

I'm a work from home mom and I think it's totally doable. It depends on a hundred things, of course, but I've honestly been amazed at how many different ways I see friends doing it.

One woman I know works a full-time job, holds down a major volunteer position with a nonprofit, and has two tiny children. She's wonder woman, obviously, but she does it very capably. I think she's a rare gem, but it's amazing to watch her work.

I work about 10-20 hours a week and I have one day at week where I have to be at the office. That day, someone watches my son while I work, and the rest of the time, I work during naps, independent play time, and during the evenings. Coparenting is a must, obviously.

Maybe it doesn't work for some people, but it's not "us freaks" who've figured it out, at least in part. It's a real number of working women who are working our hardest to be successful and we're no different than that "rest of us."

This article just made my day! I don't know another mom who works from home and has to juggle work with a toddler. All of my working friends take their kids to daycare or are stay at home moms and don't have to worry about any type of work getting done. You hit it on the nail for me! You also made me realize that I do need to step back and take a break sometimes and often I find myself getting frustrated with my toddler instead of doing just that that. One thing I can add that has really helped me stay on top of my work load is hiring an intern. I take my toddler to the park in the morning, wear him out and my intern comes at noon when I put him down for a nap. We get double the amount of work done. Then by three my toddler is up, but we manage to still squeeze in a few last minute things while he is reading, eating or hanging out. So instead of me getting in four hours of work I get in 8 hours with two people. Changed my life and now I am able to spend my weekends and evenings with my family:) Thank you soooooooo much for sharing!!

I have a full time job and I work from home 20 hours per week with a 2 year old. I agree with everything you say, and was glad to see that I intuitively do most of that. I hope you don't feel discourage by some of the less than kind comments folks posted. AND, blogging is a real job (if that is, in fact, your job). I manage my company's blog, and it takes a ton of time.

The key, in my opinion, to being successful is to have SOME outside of the home work time, even just a few hours per week. Because this then gives the liberty to take the smartphone and just go to the park when my son desperately needs it. Part of the terms of my employment were that I be available during all work hours and do the best I can on the days that I work from home. I admit, I have a fantastic boss, and many don't, but I do think society needs to allow for creative solution for work at home moms (and dads).

Thank you for this post.

I guess the right balance depends somewhat on the nature of the work, and the nature of the child. But honestly, you cannot do two things at once. I work from home 40 hours a week. When I am working, I am working. There is no way I could also watch my 2 yr old son while I am working. It would be a disservice to him and to my employer. Working from home/"telecommuting" does make life more flexible - I can take time to go to the park or storytime. But when I do that, I am not working. The comment from jcmom is pretty snarky, but most of it rings true to me.

I'm sorry but working at home with a toddler around is impossible. I work from home and I barely have time to get dressed on most days as the phone starts ringing early as people know I'm not on the commute. My employer pays me to work and meet the deadlines that this involves; there is no way that work can be put aside to indulge in play time with the children. What this piece doesn't mention is whether you work for an employer or for yourself...

I managed about 20 hours a week of work time with one toddler, but now I have a three year old and a one year old and I'm lucky to get a couple blog posts written a week. It's way harder! Especially when they don't sleep at the same time (I have a night owl vs an early riser and they nap at different times, believe me, I've been trying to fix this)

I have two little kids and even with another parent in the house, and two floors so I can escape to a quiet area when needed, working from home is very challenging.

I knew this post was a fantasy when I saw the combo of red wine, blueberries and a candle... toddlers would promptly eat the berries, spill the wine and proceed to burn the house down or at least burn themselves on the hot wax...

it IS possible to do house work with kids around. I can do laundry, clean a bathroom, and cook with them in the house (awake even) but even getting those tasks done can be a challenge

real "work" for a real length work day just doesn't seem feasible to me and believe me I have tied (just yesterday in fact)

I'm with jcmom and slopegirl!

Seems that it can be really difficult with kids. I work from home and sometimes I find it difficult with just my dog (she shreds things during teleconferences). I know in my company we don't have the flexibility with hours to take off part of the day - someone always needs something right away. I've seen a lot of coworkers with kids struggle with that, unless they have additional help.

The federal government makes you sign a form stating that you will not be the primary caregiver to another person when teleworking.

I did large graphic design projects for two PGA tournaments when my son was a toddler. It was challenging carving out the time and trying to speak with clients when my son was screaming at the same time, but somehow I managed. I found that it became more challenging to work from home as he grew a bit older. He didn't like to play by himself, and I felt guiltier about not giving him attention (I don't do the babysit with DVDs thing). I ended up with a lot of late nights. In the end I decided to pursue a more frugal lifestyle and be "just" a mom and wife for now, but I'm glad I experimented and found out that it IS possible to continue my career and do really rewarding work from home. Once my kids are in school I will probably seek work again.

Great read, nice to hear that other mums struggle with it too!
It's such a juggling act. I miss out on a lot of sleep! But love being able to see my daughter grow and learn.
I have only just started my business so maybe when it starts making money I will find it easier!

naysayers like jcmom and the like should seriously consider calming down a bit. The situation described in this post sounds EXACTLY like what my wife does, which is work for an actual employer, and has to meet actual deadlines. If our 3-yr-old had his way, he would get undivided attention. (read: he is very demanding and pesters her all day). She handles it like a champ. And based on the fact that the majority of the comments are saying, "me too!" and "thank you for posting..." i'd say that there are quite a few folks handling it like champs, and it's not much of a "fantasy".

It seems to be implied pretty clearly that this post is not talking about a 40-hr position, but some type of part-time arrangement. Either way, the negative comments just come across as transparent jealousy, or a real, unfortunate state of dissatisfaction with one's lot.

Great post! It's good to get that affirmation. Thank you!

I work for the federal government full time telecommuting from home. During the early years of my boys' lives, my husband, an executive chef (with a night job) watched the boys. I had a closed door policy on my office (ok, our bedroom) with breaks to run downstairs, get coffee, say hi, etc.

In most 'real' telework jobs where you're employed by an outside entity, you are not allowed to be concurrently watching your children and doing your job. I was blessed to have a good co-parenting situation.

Now the boys are 9 and 12. I lost my husband unexpectedly 3 years ago, but by then, the boys were in school and had been trained all their lives to hush if the phone rang and I had to take a business call. I won't say I'm lucky to have this wonderful of a career where I've been home with my kids all their lives while earning a good wage because I worked hard to get here, but I do feel blessed.

This article is a smidge misleading with the poorly chosen (though very fun!) header photo. Perhaps the kind of job the writer is doing should have been noted to avoid confusion. Whether you're able to work at home while raising children depends entirely upon your job and company and how many hours you work and what time a day those hours must be worked.

Along with many others who have commented, I could never work my full-time job from home while wrangling children. I do, in fact, work from home once or twice a week. However, I have signed an agreement with my company that my work will remain seamless whether I'm in the office or at my kitchen table.

I'm a dad who until recently was the sole earner in our home. When people asked "does your wife work" my answer was always, "Yes, harder than most people I know."

She took care of the 3 kids, and did a million and one other jobs to keep our household in order.

Skip to now. She is now a business owner of a dance studio... yup. We realize JUST how much she was able to accomplish at home now that she is also doing a full-time job being a business owner and dance instructor...

Lots of things Moms and Dads do when they are able to- to stay home with kids...

Lots of things left undone when Moms and Dads have to work full-time at real full-time jobs.

This blog is generally where I come to see a picture of a clean house, because face it, we don't have one :)

The comments were great to read! jcmom said it right. Amen and Hallelujah. I am mom blogger too, dont get me wrong, but what type of work day will allow you to sit outside or build blocks with your kids? In my "real" job, I'm not a contractor, or its not a project by project basis, its deadline driven in the crazy world of marketing in the middle of silicon valley. I am thinking about working from home with my three children, and while this article seemed like a great solution to my mommy blogging job, my job and deadlines that I owe my employer cannot wait until after Bubble Guppies. Just saying the WFH moms have higher expectations and more deadlines than folks that commute into the office everyday and this is understood.

This post (and some of the comments) fail because it lacks the definition of work and does not outline what is at stake if you do not complete your work.

This post is highly unrealistic if you are talking a 25 - 40 hour a week job, one in which you have an employer, one in which you have to connect with others during normal business hours, and one in which your income is necessary to pay the bills. If you are talking about being a freelancer, or working 10 - 20 hours a week, have minimal deadlines, or if you are a writer writing 400 word count pieces, and your income is not a make it or break it part of the family budget, then this post makes sense.

For many years I was a nanny for various families where the moms worked from home. All were financially well off, hence able to employ me. One was a women who went into her barn in their backyard and painted. She would roam in and out of the house, and would probably consume berries and wine. If she finished a painting or not it didn't so much matter. Her work week was about 20 hours and her husband's income supported the family. This article would have fit her fine.

Another was a wealthy, serious economist who shut the door to her home office and would have probably killed me or her kids if we interrupted her for anything short of notification that the house was burning down. She was on conference calls, had case loads, reports to be completed for court cases, and I am sure worked more than 40 hours a week and would laugh at this post.

My all time work and raise kids hero is Alice Munro. She chose the short story form because it was a workable length for fiction written while her children napped.

Lastly, I don't think @jcmom is snarky. She sounds realistic. And, maybe jealous of the ability to interchange blogging, cleaning, and swilling wine and berries and call that a work day. She may be one of the vast majority of Americans who do not have lives that make this possible.

grammarpolice, I didn't think it was obvious that it was a part time job. We're not jealous or overly snarky, but instead are providing counterpoint. In my company someone who would only work part of the day just wouldn't work out - or more likely, the person would end up working past midnight to get everything done (I've seen this, and they eventually quit out of pure exhaustion). It's GREAT when it can work but it shouldn't be presented as something as easy as it is presented here.

A friend of mine is a WFH dad, but he gets up at 4 AM and works 5 hours before he takes over his dad duties when his wife goes off to work. He manages another 1-2 hours during nap time and maybe another hour at some point in the evening. Sometimes he can get a full 8 hours in, sometimes not. But he has a flexible job with an ability to work any hours he chooses.

A common misconception is that a "work from home" job means setting your own hours, with a motto of "just make sure you get your work done" and then the rest of the day is yours. The vast majority of WFH jobs are not like that.

jcmom and many of you are spot on. I have worked from home for about 1 1/2 years, and even though I consider myself blessed to have the flexibility of taking a quick shower mid-day or running my dog outside while microwaving my lunch, I am expected to be at my computer/on the phone (working) from 8 AM - 5 PM everyday -- because that is what my employer pays me for. If I'm not working, I don't get paid. Period. I don't even have children yet, and I have a really hard time imagining how I'd work around a newborn/toddler and remain consistently productive, day to day. Without outside help, I can't imagine it would be possible.

This post is about a person doing TWO jobs at the same time. It's unsustainable, but luckily, kindergarten will arrive soon.

Yep, I'm on a wait list at the moment for both full-time daycare and part-time daycare. The part-time was a shorter list, so I'm anticipating that will be what we end up with while we wait for a full-time spot to open up. We've already set aside funds to cover full-time daycare in our budget, as well as additional babysitters, so I think we'll be set - but thank you for the advice! We're definitely new to this game and I'm sure it will take some time to find a balance that works well for everyone.
I work for a huge corporation and am expected to be available during normal business hours, 8-5, without exception. I can't imagine that I'd be able to fully concentrate on doing the job well if I tried to also provide the primary caregiver role (our company actually makes us sign a document and provide proof of having another caregiver). Giving up my job to stay home is not an option as we need the income and the health benefits it provides. I'm just glad working from home means I can use the time I would be commuting and getting ready in the morning to squeeze a little more time in with my family.
Most of my co-workers that work remotely have the same arrangement. Those that go into a telecommuting role thinking it means sleeping in, long lunches and flexible days don't last long in their position. :)

I am a WAHM, and this is the first year I feel basically sane again -- because my guys are both in school! I wouldn't trade the past 7 years for anything BUT it was a crazy juggling act with many "workdays" crammed into 9pm-12am sessions staggered with 3am-6am sessions coupled with passing the baton back and forth evenings and weekends with my FT working hubby so that much of the time we didn't get a lot of time as a whole family (lots of mommy time, some daddy time, not a great deal of both at same time). For a couple of years I "time-shared" a nanny with 4 other families and we had her 1 day a week. Helpful. All of this sounds crazy, but the ultimate goal was this: raise our kids during their baby/toddler/preschool years as much as possible ourselves, rather than outsourcing to daycare. I'm so so glad we did. You never get those years back, and if there is any way to make it work -- even if you feel a bit bonky at times -- it really and truly is worth it. Teaching and guiding your kids is an amazing process. But it is far from easy, and I only now feel the return to true work-life balance. But, everyone is different -- some will find it easier, some more difficult. I really do think everyone would find it worthwhile, though.

(Oh, I am a freelance designer, and was a designer well before having kids. I feel very fortunate that I could bend this career to fit the above for a few years! But it's true, many WAH-parents can't set own hours...)

Really like this blog and newsletter but I have to say, this post makes me feel miserable.
I gave up the work from home allowance my company gave me because I was not able to find the right balance between work and 2 toddlers (+nanny)
I so agree with Thorndale, and would fit more in the "economist mum" she describes which ended up making me very sad that I could not just "have it all"
As a result, I work in a office and get home to be a 100% mum in the evening wish is a better balance.

What does this have to do with apartments or therapy? I don't get it.

Gerrysing's post is exactly why I was so snarky. The vast majority of working women can't "work" this way. They see blogs like this and moms trilling about how awesome it is to just take an hour for themselves in the middle of the day and feel like a big ball of crap because they can't do the same.

I DO love my WFH life because I actually can set my own schedule but I still need paid child care. Some work I can do at night. I can pay a buck to grade-school aged Chicken #1 to watch toddler Chicken #2 for an hour. Fortunately I fall into the middle ground - I'm not the economist mom, but I'm certainly not the dopey painter. For the middle-grounders, who need some paid child care, some creative juggling, etc - here's how I make it work:

Like a previous poster said: Nanny share. Did this for a while with a teacher during the summer. We guaranteed her at least $16 an hour (2 kids) - each additional mom paid an extra $8 an hour. Sitter got max $32/hr for 4 kids and we got off with an $8/hr nanny who was not going to drink all the gin and leave the kids at the firehouse.

Babysitting swap: Get your two best mom friends. I watch my kid and their two kids on Monday for 3 hours. On Tuesday Mom #2 takes all 3 kids; Wednesday, Mom #3 takes all 3. You work 3 hours to get 6 hours of child care. Expand to cover as many hours as you need.

Pre-teenagers. Yes, they are more jaded than when we were teens but they still get pretty excited about $5 an hour and a 12 year old can watch your kid for 2 hours after school and make sure they don't set your drapes on fire.

Oh, and also I am hereby planning on using the word "bonky" as much as I possibly can because it's awesome.

The upside to working from home is that the time you save commuting you can spend with your children. I have discovered in the last six years of transitioning from part time work at home and caring for the children full time (which meant working during nap time and after bed time and fielding phone calls at the park) to working full time that you can't really work and watch your children at the same time. You either ignore your work, or your children. There is nothing worse than needing to get something done for work while your child wants your attention and you have to tell them you can't give them the attention they desire. It's just not the message I wanted to give them. So for a while when my kids were toddlers I left the house to do my work. Now that they are 4 and 6 it is easier to explain to them I will be with them when I am done working. Most importantly to making it work is that their dad is their primary care giver now so he is always here to shower them with attention when I am working from home. I enjoy being able to hear them playing, or listening to my husband read them a book while I work.
I think it's important for women considering working from home while being the primary care giver to be realistic about what their work schedule will really be, which is nap time and after bed time. You have to be prepared for the physical challenge of keeping up with your kids and then finding a way to stay motivated for working late at night, or early in the morning. I had to institute a second cup of coffee at 3pm.

As for the photo - drinking wine while working and watching your children. Really?

Good lord -- like one glass of wine makes it impossible to mother or work. Some of my finest writing happens after a nice glass of cab. Keep your head up and ignore the snark. It's true that many women -- particularly those who aren't creative professionals -- can't juggle WFH full-time plus childcare, but I know several women who work part-time (to keep their careers somewhat on track while their wee ones are little) and still manage to look after their kids. I don't have kids, but if I did, it would make more economic sense to work part-time, not full-time, while caring for them and handling the housework. Ladies: No need to heap on the snark just because you don't have a comparable situation.

ps Do you really look that chic working from home? It takes so much motivation to get me out of my yoga pants. I've recently become obsessed with the versatile and oh-so-comfy maxi dress.

In reality squeezing 40 hours in may not be realistic. 30 is definitely manageable as long as you are prepared to work at night and a couple of hours on the weekends, and have a partner who is OK with that. If you want to work 40 hours - you can try for a couple of days with a nanny or childcare.

Forget to add my tips!

I've worked from home for years. First with two toddlers, then one toddler plus one at school and now both at full time school. Actually having one child at school was the hardest, as the school run chops your day into small pieces and my second child got bored without his sister around. I also recommend:
1. Having some backup care available on an ad hoc basis (nanny/carer/grandparent) if you have tight deadlines - you can get a big chunk of uninterrupted time if necessary.
2. Get a cleaner (f you can afford it)! Even a few hours a fortnight - it makes a huge difference to your sanity and forces you and the kids to get to the park for a few hours.
3. Once the kids are at school - force yourself to work when they're out and switch off when they are home. I find this very tough, I may notice a new email and "just quickly check something" and before I know it I've done another hour.
4. Plan your household - plans meals, lunches, sport, playdates etc and use your calendar. So when it's work time you can focus and not be distracted.
5. Hanging the washing out in the sunshine can be quite a nice break from your desk!

I work from home as a designer and illustrator and author...until my son was in kindergarten I had day care three days a week, and when he was a baby I had a great nanny three times a week.. On days my son was with me during the week I was fully with him and would work during nap time , time when he played by himself , and as soon as my husband was back home until late at night. Now I work at night and in the morning , and the only reason I survive is because I work mostly with the east coast and Europe , they can't communicate in the afternoons.

I had some odd moments. Skype is the best and worst of tools : one time my son , fed up to wait for me after a 15mn conference, began to throw his stuffed animals at the computer . And another time he stole a full box of brownie bites in the kitchen and began to stuff himself just behind me. I am glad I work with people with a sense of humor. I don't usually work much when my son is alone with me.

Working from home on my own projects , I do have to work as much if not more than when I wasn't telecommuting. But I do get to run to school if there is a problem, I can settle a sickie camp in my studio, and instead of a lunch break I do get to ride my bike for errands instead, which I really like to do. Sometimes I work late because I took some well deserved me time, and I appreciate to shop when nobody is around, and to work when everybody sleeps.

Working from home is like having the possibility to have your children at work: not for the faint at heart.

PS: I do dress correctly even if I seat between the bedroom and the kitchen . It helps me feeling that I am in fact at work and not at home.

I've still got a few years to go before having kids, but am hoping to creating some kind of balanced working from home situation. My saintly parents will provide two solid days of childcare when I can go into the office (a small-ish history museum). Then, I'm hoping to get somewhere between 16 and 24 hours of work in the other three days. Luckily, my husband is studying to be a teacher, so can hopefully take over the childcare by 4pm each day. It sounds like it will work in my head, but who knows? Wish me luck!

Oh, and I have an outdoor "office" (converted garden shed) that helps me focus when I work from home now, so maybe that will help in the future too!

Once again I find myself reading comments to women about women who are judging parenting skills and work ethic. Just more shaming and not a lot of actual constructive conversation.

Why does work from home mom with kids always translates to work from home mom with toddlers? There is this automatic assumption that every work from home mom has small children and never school aged children who may be homeschooled via online public school charter or other homeschool co-op program. I expected an article that would address living and work space as it relates to working. Nice article and good information...just a little disappointed.

Such an interesting range of opinions on this one. I am 8 months pregnant and work from home (freelance/business owner). I work about 30 hours/week and while I plan on cutting back some in the beginning, I do hope to continue working while also parenting. My husband's (FT) schedule is flexible so that will help some, and I am definitely planning to hire in-home childcare a few hours a week once my little one is past the newborn stage (i.e., crawling and getting into everything). Thanks for the article, and some of the helpful advice in the comments.

I don't think anyone here is judging anyone. Women are just sharing the challenges and experiences of the reality of working at home with children.

For those who need the money, and can't afford childcare (which was me for a while) you can totally pull off part-time work from home with the kids.

But, to try it full-time I don't see how you can pull it off with out some child care.

As an aside, I think the focus on toddlers is because it is so much harder to work at home with a toddler vs newborns or older children. It requires constant adaptation, so flexibility in your schedule is a must.

If you manage to survive the challenges of working from home with little one's, once your children are in school it really does offer an amazing flexibility (depending on the position of course) to carve out time in your day for volunteering at school or doing activities with your kids. I am slowing working towards a schedule that would allow me to finish my work by school pick up time and devote the rest of the day to them. It is an ever changing journey.
Good luck to everyone!

There are really a lot more variables to go into here... is someone a single parent or do they have a partner to help? Is there family nearby? How old is the child? Do they have special needs? What type of education/ experience does a mother have? Is there another source of income?

Basically good ideas, but not feasible for all of us.

What I want to weigh in on is the term "Stay at Home Mom". Because there's "Work From Home Mom". So, what, does "Stay at Home Mom" not work? Hell yeah she does!!! And she doesn't earn a penny for all her 24/7 work! So, that's the bee in MY bonnet. Also, this foto! Who the heck can work sitting on the edge of the sofa with a laptop perched on their lap. The woman in the foto is NOT telecommuting with a few toddlers tucked in for a nap. AT could have chosen a much more accurate foto to represent the "Work for Pay Mom Whose Office is in Her Home" (different from the "Work for No Pay Mom Whose Office is All Over the House"). And I agree with the others- a glass of wine while working AND minding the kids?! Uh, no. Unless she's using the wine to wash down the handful of Valiums! Maybe that explains her maniacal grin!!!

But on a more serious note: Working 40 hours for someone else from home with kids is just not practical. Nor is it "professional". "Having it all" should not include having a nervous breakdown. However, working for ones self, part time, or flex-time... that is perfectly do-able AND helps keep ones skills sharp & up to date (not to mention sanity intact) for the day when mom/dad wants to transition into the rat race (er... I mean work in the corporate world). I worked for myself when my daughter was a baby because I had gotten fired from too many jobs for taking time off when I was sick. Then there was the time she was hospitalized for 3 weeks because of major surgery when she was a year old. This was a life or death scenario for my baby & I was fired. So..... screw the corporate world (yeah, I know, today I could sue the company, but this was way back in the dinosaur days of the early 80s). I started my own business, worked from home, then started traveling for work with her in tow. She learned early on how to navigate & conduct herself in the real world- not just a world parked in front of the TV while mom tried to cram in a few hours of work. So, working for pay from home with kids is VERY doable. However, it takes finesse, strong self motivation & self discipline. Before the advent of mass transport, mass media, & equal rights moms ran the home, raised the kids, & often made "pin money" from selling baked & canned foods, fresh that morning milk & eggs, sewing & taking in laundry. This was done with a herd of kids at the end of the apron strings. Women have ALWAYS worked from home!!!

O.k. I gotta laugh because I am wondering if anyone bothered to clicked the link at the end of the post indicating the source of the image. While the choice of image may have been a poor one, I don't think that person is a work from home mom. It's a post from a House Tour. Anyway, I am a SAHM. I did not become that by choice, I was laid off this past summer. Before my husband and I were doing split shifts to save on child care something I will never to again if I can help it. Basically both of us were single parents 5 days a week and had only two days to catch up on chores and family time. I do believe some comments, while negative, may have been true. I am working on a career change and I want to work from home...for myself. I think as moms, women, parents, we need to be more positive. I will make it work and adjust accordingly. You have to be realistic not pessimistic. I know of a women who finished med school after giving birth in the process. People can do anything they put their mind to. In the height of our split shift schedule (had to be up at 4:30 am and out of house by 5:30 am) I was working on my new found love for party planning, design, and blogging while working (in laboratory...have a BS degree), raising my child (no t.v. until 2 yrs of age), cooking, baking and cleaning. When I first got laid off before I got pregnant I was getting up at 5:30 am to take advantage of my hubby being home until 9:30 am and then stay up til 11:30 pm to give myself more time for research, cleaning after my son went to bed at 7:30 pm. So point is, don't be negative, don't "hate"...do what you can, don't do what you can't and give props to those who can kick butt and do it all. I have days where I can jump out a window and run for the hills and others where I want to throw myself a parade. If I see others doing it better I get motivation. Some of you depress me, but when I can get my career going which is scarier with baby 2 on the way and a wild 2.5 yr old boy being a hot mess, I am going to try to kill and meditate on days I can't.

Oh, I just saw a massive amount of typos on my comment so be kind. When I said going to try to kill I meant "kill it".

KFair- anyone doing as much as you are should automatically receive a "free pass" on typos! Don't forget to take some time to pamper yourself. So many times women get caught up in the "I wake at 4am work work work and hit the hay at midnight" syndrome. All good, just don't let yourself crash & burn! Pace yourself & enjoy the journey!!!

Thanks Ecuadorianan1, you must be a mom cause you know that is a problem that I struggle with and probably will forever.

I think it all comes down to the specific job and specific kids! If either or both are super flexible it might work - however my job is so structured and my toddler so "needy" that I can't just juggle them as I see fit - I need at least 6 hours a day of childcare, and even with that I struggle terribly to get in the rest of my full time job. Most days I truly want to throw in the towel, especially with Baby 2 coming.

On the other hand, I supervise someone who's been managing quite well so far to do his job and take care of his daughter all day through age 1. On the one hand I think that's great for people when it works, but on the other, I have to wonder - just because she doesn't fuss, isn't all that time sitting around without stimulation unhealthy? I couldn't do it even if my child would let me.

This pretty much sums up my experience exactly. I am very thankful to have a full time job that allows me to work at home every other day; MWF at the office and TTh at home. It allows me to feel like I'm still spending a lot of time investing in my daughter and managing the home while also keeping my job (and income) that I love. When she was an infant, I could work most of the day but with frequent breaks. As she became a mobile baby and now toddler, I've realized, like you, that I need to make a choice. I can't do both work and give her attention so I need to just break away from work and be a mom…usually for a big chunk of the morning. Nap time is awesome. I can get SO MUCH done in 3 hours when I know that's all I'll get until her bedtime. Obviously that's not an 8 hour work day. If I'm slammed at work, I'll put in an hour before she gets up and then get back to it when she goes to bed. I can also steal about 30 minutes of work time with a captivating episode of Yo Gabba Gabba when I'm desperate. It's a tricky balance but I'm so thankful that I can do both - work and be a mom at home, at least part of the time. It's nice to hear that others are having the same experience.

A few thoughts on this article:

I'll concede that the photo could be perceived as misleading but like KFair said, it's just an image from a House Tour, not of the author herself. The photo itself is not a big deal.

The author -- Sarah Robbins -- is sharing her own experience in hopes of helping others. Nowhere in the article does she say this is how everyone should do things when working from home with kids. I think that's important to remember when reading it (and then offering your own opinion).

The article could have used some more context -- what the author does for a living, for instance, would have helped to frame the conversation. If you click on Sarah's AT contributor profile, you can follow a link to her site -- she's a photographer and editorial writer, a job which I'm sure allows her flexibility in getting things done.

I can appreciate other commenters' frustration with trying to work full-time jobs from home with kids, without daycare or in-home help. From experience, that's a pretty unsuccessful scenario (at least generally speaking), unless -- as others said -- you can give up sleep.

BUT -- like the author pointed out in the first paragraph -- technology has enabled people to work from home AND make a decent living. If you're a photographer, writer, designer, consultant, BLOGGER (people are foolish to discount blogging as a way to earn income, whether directly or indirectly), you can make this work, at least on a part-time basis while your kids are little.

If you are telecommuting or working for an outside employer (especially an established company), then working with kids tugging at your sleeve all day or babies screaming is not productive.

So, within that context, I think the article is great. As a work-from-home Mom of a 22 mos. old (making a part-time income as a consultant and designer), I can relate to -- and appreciate -- Sarah's comments.

I do take advantage of nap time to get things done that require a lot of mental focus. Having worked in the corporate office environment for over a decade before having kids, I can honestly say that I often get more done undistracted in that block of time than I did during many 8-10 hour days in an office where I was constantly distracted by conference calls and pointless meetings and office chit chat.

I also try to get things done while my toddler is awake. It's impossible to do a lot of housework but I focus on what I CAN do -- folding laundry, dusting, wiping down counters, etc. Every little bit helps.

And I try to get up an hour or two before he does every day to get at least one big thing accomplished. That way I feel good about getting my day started right before he wakes up.

Great article -- thanks for writing it!

P.S. I meant to write Sarah Dobbins, not Robbins.

I love the glass of wine in the picture. You can't do that at the office.

There are definite benefit and drawbacks of being a Work-At-Home-Mom. You get to see your kids, be there for them when they're sick, take a nap when you need to if you've been up with them all night.

I think the key is honoring your time. When you are with the kids, be with the kids. When you are working, work. Trying to do a little bit of both can drive you crazy. At least it does me. The kids feel it.

Then there are times I need to get work done. I've had to tell my kids repeatedly that Daddy is not the only one who works around here. They are still astonished by this fact, because I'm at home. Daddy goes to "WORK WORK WORK" (said in a daddy voice) and Mommy "Oh, she just works works works" (my kids pretend to type on a computer and giggle). The emphasis is there and their's. I found this curious and am actively trying to reshape their way of thinking of WORK and work.

I just want to chime in with some of the others that I am fairly certain the author of this post either works in more of a part-time situation or as a freelancer. (Apparently, she works as an editorial writer and photographer, as someone else commented --- both of those things can be freelance.) In either situation, you have more flexibility to live the life she describes. I work at home too, and love it. I too, am an artist and a writer. I think of myself as working part-time, and I am a freelancer. If I had kids (I don't --- just animals) my day would proceed largely as hers does. However, I can't imagine working a true 40 hour work week in which you have to respond to the needs and demands of co-workers and colleagues with kids constantly underfoot. I actually am not so sure it would be possible if you are counting a true 40 hours and you have young kids. But I think it's definitely doable if you are a freelancing writer and artist and no one is expecting you to log in a certain number of hours but rather just produce copy or a photograph. As others have said, the author probably should have put it all in context as "working at home" can mean vastly different things depending on what field you're in, and it can also mean 15 hours a week or 80, full-time work or freelance.

I would kill for a 40 hour work week, and truthfully I don't personally know anyone that works less than 60 hours a week. Of course, that isn't to say that people aren't working 40 hours a week, but I think this article really needed qualifiers on the type of work that is possible to do from home with a child.

Ok...Seriously some of these posts are crazy! I work from home...for pay even!! I have worked anywhere from 25-40 hours a week for the last year. I also have my now 2 year old daughter home with me. She just recently started daycare 2 times a week but that was for socialization, not because I needed her to be. I take what we call "giggle breaks" through the day for a few minutes at a time and I take time to have lunch with her and such but I still get all of my work done in a timely manner. I have conference calls all the time and yes she is usually in the background but nobody minds. If you prioritize and are good at time management you can get it all done. Granted my house usually looks like a tornado went through it and the dishes don't get done right away but it gets done when I have time. I'm also a Navy Wife and I don't have my husband home majority of the time so it falls on me. I do have a 13 year old as well that helps in the evenings if I need her to and a great support system of friends that are always there for me if I need it.

I guess my point is this...Being a working stay-at-home mom is totally do-able!! I love being able to work from home. My daughter has a play room filled with toys that keep her busy and happy and I don't miss a moment of her life. If you can't find 5 minutes to break away to look at the tower she built or to help get the crayons and coloring book out then you are doing it wrong. My company is a great non-profit. We all work from home, and we're all military spouses and majority of us have small children at home. Yet, we are all very productive and get our work done. I may wind up making my day longer by taking my little breaks BUT I love what I do and I love having my little girl at home with me. I've always done it and she's used to it. We have a schedule and it works for us.

I HEAR YA!

This post is completely unrealistic for a full time job with an employer--though perhaps not for a part-time, freelance/projects based job. I don't think it's "snarky" or "jealous" to point out the obvious. I am a professor so while my class time is limited, the other time I need to be researching and writing. Can't do that during nap times and late nights alone. I had a nanny for my two kids when they were infants, and while I sometimes worked from home so I could poke my head in and see them, there was was no way I could have WORKED and taken care of them at the same time. I think not being upfront about all the issues other commenters have raised is what sets the bar unrealistic ally high for working moms everywhere.

I'm with jcmom and slope girl - my son would be in serious danger if he stayed home while i worked. I can't even surf the net without him grabbing my arms for attention... its happening rite now as i type! so daycare it is... for both our well being.
ps. im in architecture.

This is timely for me because, after about 3 years of working MORE than full-time from home in healthcare consulting, I'm quitting this Thursday, 2/28.

I'm with the "impossible" side of the argument, but it really does depend entirely on the kind of work you do. It is certainly impossible if you have a job like mine that requires all day phone and web meetings. With my schedule and the demands of my job, there is NO WAY for me to take "giggle breaks," or go to the park or even tend to a sick child. Most days, I'll mute my phone and throw it on speaker just to take a bathroom break--it's THAT nuts. I eat at my desk every day. Lunch break? hahahaha... For those of us with jobs like this, there is NO WAY we could do this *and* tend to children. The handful of days my childcare has fallen through and I ATTEMPTED to work with my (single digit aged) children in the house, I nearly died from the stress... and I certainly wasn't an effective or competent worker with my children hanging on my ankles. If I did that every day, I'd be fired in a heartbeat.

I've even had full-time childcare this entire time, and yet I'm STILL quitting because it is all just. too. much. The plan now is to do contract work for my employer a mere 10 hours per week--the exact amount of time that BOTH of my children are in school each week. At least this will allow me to lose the babysitter (and all the stress and chaos that comes with that), but I am realistic enough to know that I can ONLY work when the kids are not present. My manager is pushing me to do 15 hours, but I won't budge. The only way I could manage that would be to work in the evenings, and I just refuse to do that anymore.

I work from home/stay at home with my 14 month old son. I'm a photographer, and I put in an average of 16 hours every weekend on shoots, while my husband is home with our son. He's able to work from home one day per week, so it's usually Friday, and my "weekend" includes Friday shoots. During the week when I'm home with my son, we do all kinds of things to allow me the time I need to accomplish all the "not out shooting" work of maintaining a photography business - editing, scheduling, corresponding with clients, marketing, blogging and website updating, social media, client orders and deliveries, etc. That all comes to anywhere from 12-18 hours per week. I do them in the morning while husband plays with son before work, during his nap times, and after he goes to bed at night. I also can work a bit while he plays in his crib next to my desk. The rest of the daylight hours I play with him, feed him, do housework, and answer emails from my smartphone when I can. I get it done. I could not pay all my families bills on what I earn but I more than break even and contribute financially to the family. it's hard and it's frustrating, but it is also really rewarding and makes me push my boundaries, get scrappy, work smart. No need to criticize the article if your situation doesn't work the way hers does. Some jobs don't lend themselves to flexibility - others do. Finding one that does may be the key to working from home while caring for your children.

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