The Real Estate Listing So Dreamy, I Wrote a Rom Com About It

published Mar 1, 2018
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Sometimes you see a New York apartment so dreamy, so swoon-worthy it deserves to be the impossibly perfect apartment of the protagonist in a romantic comedy. This is one such apartment, so I took the liberty of writing a treatment of one such rom-com.


Rain patters on the expansive skylight in the solarium, creating a cozy atmosphere. The protagonist, LADY WITH GLASSES, is on the ladder of her massive floor to ceiling bookshelf. She hops down off the ladder, throws the book onto her couch and builds a fire in the wood-burning fireplace. This song plays in the background.

After the fire is lit, she surveys her 3,000-square-foot triplex apartment. Even though she works in publishing (low enough in the ranks to have an intimidating but ultimately warm-hearted boss, high up enough to be in charge of the book by the ROGUISHLY GOOD LOOKING WRITER with an attitude who just needs to be loved) she was able to afford the $2.695 million dollar asking price.

As she stares up at her barrel vaulted ceilings, and ionic columns, she wonders why she feels like something is missing when she seemingly has it all. She looks down at the hardwood floors that run throughout the living and dining area and briefly remembers the spark she felt with the ROGUISHLY GOOD LOOKING WRITER. The doorbell rings.

She buzzes her best friend into the pre-war 10-unit co-op building, where basement and bike storage are included. Her friend BRASSY KNOW IT ALL WITH THE JOKES sometimes stays with her since she is a single woman in a two-bedroom, three-bathroom apartment that could eventually be converted to have more bedrooms should the right roguishly good-looking writer come along.

BRASSY KNOW IT ALL opens the pocket doors into the kitchen to retrieve some crackers to gesture with. She has also brought a bag of laundry to wash in the apartment’s washer/dryer combo because she is a loveable mess.

The GOOD LOOKING WRITER appears at her door with a new manuscript — it’s wet. As the pages dry off in her home office space (that could be converted into a bedroom) the writer comments on the abundance of closet space and also her cold demeanor. She feels seen, she makes a joke about the home’s air conditioning system and sparks fly.

You can see more photos of the listing on Stribling. You can email me directly to buy the rights to this hit.

h/t Curbed