This Is the Secret to Actually Enjoying Your Weekend (Say Goodbye to Sunday Scaries)

Heather Bien
Heather Bien
Heather Bien is a Washington, D.C.-based freelance writer whose work has appeared on MyDomaine, The Knot, Martha Stewart Weddings, HelloGiggles, and more. You'll often find her making pitstops for roadside antique shops, drooling over original hardwood floors, or perfecting her…read more
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How often do you get to the end of a weekend and wonder where the time went? Did you have big plans for relaxation or crossing chores off your to-do list, and somehow you accomplished neither? There’s so much pressure to have a perfect weekend, every weekend, and yet, too often the hours fly by, leaving you feeling underwhelmed and wondering where your two precious days went. 

Alexis Haselberger, a time management and productivity coach, explains that weekends can sometimes create as much stress as they’re meant to relieve. “Weekends are often fraught because people are still thinking about work, because they’re still doing work, or because they’re thinking about the fact that they’re not doing work.”

Not doing work becomes as much of a chore as doing work, but at the same time, pretending that the perfect weekend will fall magically into place is a farce. Rest and fun require planning, just like chores and errands. When it comes to enjoying your weekend, here’s the expert-approved 10-step plan for shooing away Sunday scaries every time. 

What Is a Perfect Weekend?

The perfect weekend looks different for everyone but, at its core, it has a balance of knocking items off your to-do list, finding time for rest, and being with family and friends if that recharges you. 

One weekend, that could mean bouncing from social plan to social plan on Friday and Saturday, then taking time Sunday for a deep clean of the house and a movie night in. Another weekend, it could mean spending Friday night in, making time for a yoga class and a long walk Saturday, then meeting a friend for coffee on Sunday. 

The ideal weekend is going to be a moving target, and that’s what it’s supposed to be. But, regardless of how you’re feeling this weekend, here are 10 steps to enjoying your weekend.

1. Define Goals for Enjoying Your Weekend

The best way to have a good weekend is to know what you want from the weekend. Rachael Chatham, LCMHC, of Whole Self Therapy, PLLC, explains, “A perfect weekend starts with clarity. If you have no idea how you want to use your time, you’re likely to find yourself with a case of the Sunday scaries and nothing to show for it, perhaps asking yourself ‘Where did the time go!?’”

She suggests getting clear about what needs to get done and then finding the time in your weekend calendar to accomplish those goals, regardless of whether they are rest, social, or to-do list-related goals.

2. Plan for Next Week on Friday

Arriving at Sunday night and realizing you need to spend a few hours organizing your entire life schedule can drive weekend anxiety. Haselberger suggests getting ahead of it on Friday. “This way, everything on your work to-do list has a next action date of Monday or the future. And this means that it’s much more likely you’ll be able to leave work (and work anxiety) at work, and actually be present in your weekend,” says Haselberger. 

If you do leave it until Sunday night, there’s a good chance you’ve spent part of your weekend worrying about what’s on the list. Write it down on Friday and let your Monday self deal with it. 

3. Understand Your Social Needs

No two people have the same social needs, so you need to figure out what works for you. Haselberger says, “We’ve all had those weekends that were so social but left us feeling so tired, and like we need a weekend after the weekend to recover. Decide in advance how much social time you want and need, and stick to it.”

If that seems daunting, Haselberger recommends looking back at your calendar and reflecting on the weekends, particularly in terms of the number and type of activities you had planned. “Do you remember feeling overloaded or like there wasn’t enough going on? Use those reflections to inform future plans,” says Haselberger. She advises building in time for rest and recovery if you’ve felt overloaded in the past.

She asks, “At the end of each weekend, or each week, take stock of your social battery; did you do too much, too little?” If you have trouble finding clear patterns, Haselberger suggests leaving weekend plans open so your schedule can come together in a more spontaneous way. You can decide each day what you’re up for and make plans as they feel right.

Credit: ra2 studio/Shutterstock.com

4. Time Block Chores

Chores, life admin, and errands are usually unavoidable during the weekend but, if left unchecked, they can take up the better part of a day. 

“Most of us have life logistics stuff to get done on the weekend, like grocery shopping and cleaning. You might feel like you have more free time on the weekend if you confine the chores to a single window of time, maybe a 2-3 hour block on Saturdays,” says Haselberger. Don’t let the chores drag on — set a timer and once it goes off, you’re done.

5. Make Downtime a To-Do 

Sitting down to do nothing is just as important as meeting a friend for brunch, but so many of us have trouble getting into a downtime mode because we feel like there are other things we should and could be doing. Haselberger suggests getting over that ‘should’ guilt by adding a timeblock to the calendar that tells you to relax and do whatever you want.

“You’ll feel a lot less guilty doing ‘whatever you want’ even if that’s binge-watching Netflix, if that’s what you’re supposed to be doing according to your calendar,” says Haselberger.

6. Have Activities on Tap

Weekends waste away when you’re not sure what to do — you end up sitting around trying to think of things to do instead of getting out there and doing the things. If you have activities on tap, it’s easier to fill a free afternoon. “Brainstorm the types of activities that ‘fill you up’ and make you feel refreshed and energized. Keep this list someplace visible and use it like a menu for how to spend that weekend time,” says Haselberger. 

Need ideas? Museum visits, exploring a new neighborhood, or trying your hand at a recipe that’s too involved for a weeknight are all good ideas to keep in the free weekend afternoon queue. 

7. Alternate Action and Rest

“If I watch a movie, I try to make my next time block active: Go for a walk, unload the dishwasher, take a shower,” says Sara Lobkovich, OKR expert and consultant at Red Currant Collective. You could even do some of these at the same time. She suggests folding laundry while you watch TV. Give yourself a balance of action and rest, even if the activities at hand seem mundane.

Credit: Kseniya Ovchinnikova / Getty Images

8. Move Early in the Day

On the weekend, you may not be getting the steps you normally reach during your commute or going to your after work fitness class. But fitness and wellness coach Gina Aliotti emphasizes that it’s important to stay active, even on the weekends. “Things come up, the weekends are filled with activities, gatherings and spontaneous social events, don’t wait to get in your workout, get in your workout first thing,” says Aliotti. Of course, your movement of choice doesn’t need to be a gym session — it can be whatever feels good, from a stroll around the block to some light stretching in bed

And, since a perfect weekend means feeling good, she also recommends continuing your weekday meal routine — don’t skip meals just because your daily schedule is different.

9. Unplug on Sunday Evening

This is the time to put down the phone and get yourself in a calm, centered mindset for the upcoming week. “Take time on Sunday to prepare for the week. Meal prep, set your week’s intentions and allow yourself to detox from social media a bit. Creating Sunday self-care rituals and routines will ensure you step into your week ready and excited to tackle your goals,” says Aliotti.

Anouska Shenn, founder of The Office Yoga Company, points out there’s no one-size-fits-all way to feel more balanced on a Sunday evening and ready to tackle the week ahead — but the answer doesn’t need to be complicated. Often, it means doing the opposite of what you are expected to do during the week. Give your mind and body the opportunity to stretch in different and calming ways.

“If you work a lot with screens, focus on doing some kind of analog activity or body-centered practice, like breathwork,” says Shenn. “If you’re a freelancer and work remotely a lot, something more social might set you up better — like a walk with a friend or doing some volunteering.”

10. Remember That Rest Is Doing Something

Remember, resting is a key piece of enjoying your weekend. “Don’t forget that something gets produced from rest, too: ease, space, and calm. Maintaining the pace of a 40-hour work week can be a real challenge, so be sure to honor your body’s need for relaxation,” says Chatham. “While you chill, you can celebrate having found the right balance and fitting it all into your weekend plans!”

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