This Not-So-Subtle Middle Finger Figurine Is the Best Purchase I Made for My Home This Past Year
Like some others during the pandemic, I expanded my sweatpants collection, upped my red wine consumption, and perfected a killer banana bread recipe. (Pre-roasting your bananas is the secret. You’re welcome.) I even attempted to cut my own hair, which I can confirm did not bode well for me and my already-pesky cowlick. The one task I accomplished most successfully, though, had to be redecorating my tiny studio in New York City.
I’m a colorful guy, both in personality and design decisions, but my mood was a bit more monochromatic and gray this past year. So out went the decade-long orange and lime green accents I had, and in came dark, sophisticated colors. As a finishing touch to furniture, fabric, and wall art upgrades, I invested in knickknacks, trinkets, and figurines that spoke to my interests without being super obvious. A Beyoncé-themed coffee table book (duh!), a metallic seashell (nod to my Florida upbringing), and charred juniper candle (fall is my favorite season) were just some of the new pieces I chose for my shelves and tabletops. A sense of humor is a big part of my personality and decorating style, so I also had to scoop the Interior Illusions middle finger hand decorative object from Amazon. Metaphorically, it’s my big “eff you” to 2020, and it’s actually become one of my favorite pieces in my place.
Flipping (literally) the COVID script with this purchase was goal number one. I didn’t want to buy something that reminded me of the virus itself. Instead, I wanted something that not only memorialized the general mood of the world but showcased a bit of my own personality: crass, bold, and brazenly unapologetic.
Simple in its design and message, the middle finger salute now sits proud and pretty atop a stack of cascading shelves, almost like a star that crowns an off-kilter themed Christmas tree. I should preface my decision to invest in this object by saying that I’m very grateful for my health, steady income, and “just okay” mental state for most of the year. Sure, I had my moments, but I’m thankful every day that my day-to-day was not as dramatically impacted by COVID as it was for so many others — I feel for everyone in personal pain and am filled with gratitude for everyone who’s had to be on the front lines of this virus. That being said, I have always put my work before everything I do, and 2020 was the year that my debut cookbook, “Basic Bitchen” came out, which was supposed to be a life-changing, career-defining event.
As a former publicist and perpetual control freak, it was difficult for me to accept that this book launch, a major goal in life, wasn’t going to happen as planned. So I appreciate this item’s ability to capture my disposition in a way that is not only emblematic of these tougher times in general but also clever, uncomplicated, and funny versus vulgar (at least in my opinion… but that’s up for debate, I guess).
Now that there’s a glimmer of hope on the horizon, my Amazon find (which can be painted to match any room!) may seem a bit over-the-top or unnecessary. Life is always going to throw curve balls though, and sometimes nothing will remedy the sudden urge to say “eff this” and flip the bird at the situation you’re in. This figurine will be staying in my apartment as a not-so-gentle reminder that no one’s really in control of life (least of all me!), but small things can make you smile and help you get through each day with a little less anger, heartache, and disappointment.