The Worst Real Estate Euphemisms (And What They Actually Mean)

published May 1, 2015
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We’ve heard some pretty delusional ways to describe architectural features over the years. There are always certain less-than-desirable elements to any home and it makes sense to soften the bad things by lying… er— circumventing the truth. So what are the most common euphemisms we’ve come across? Read on.


Nice try, this means tiny.

“Old world”

Means just old.

“Garden level”

Don’t be fooled, this means basement.



“Shabby chic”

Usually more shabby, less chic.

“Open concept”

This is a studio where your bed is in the living room.

“Flooded with light”

It’s a nine-story walk up (you’re up so high though!).

“Full of character”

There’s a toilet in the kitchen.


On a good day, funky means interesting and cool or it might just mean super smelly.

The Many Questions I Have About This Viral House: A List (Image credit: Reddit user liquidthc)

“One of a kind”

Maybe there’s a reason they only made one?


Run down


Random, haphazard layout and finishes.


This means worn in (if you’re lucky) or (more likely) nearly threadbare.


No one’s bothered to update it.

“Great location/close to nightlife”

You live above a bar.

“Walkable to everything”

Parking not included.

“Designer kitchen”

Builder-grade everything, but new builder grade.

This is fun! Add your two cents. What are your favorite roll-your-eyes euphemisms?

Re-edited from a post originally published 5.1.2015 – LS